g l i t t r b u g

whaddup, y'all! i'm in los angeles. i like to blabber about television!

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As usual, I LOVE BLAKE

Why are you stealing Nic Hawk?

Why is Adam such an idiot?

He's like... the best. He knew to save the sassy gay dude with dance moves & a cool voice. Its so confusing that he does all this stuff that is supposed to make me want to marry him & yet, is already married? I don't get it.

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Holly Henry's Little Brother

IS THERE ANYTHING SWEETER AND MORE MAKING OF ME TO FORM TEARS AND REMEMBER I HAVE A TUMBLR ACCT THAN THIS LIL FELLA?!

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"You don't have to be sorry for not being in love with me."

Um. I dunno. I think you should be a little sorry, Des. I'm sorry about all of this crying I am having(yes: choosing) to watch.

I want Drew to know that even though I have a pre-existing relationship with Brooks, that he is more than welcome to come over, take off his shirt, and have as many hugs and bowls of ice cream that he wants. He is a beautiful boy & knows how to express his thoughts & feelings - which is like - s'cool.

Aw. Don't be so sad! And I have some thoughts on your feeling - "she's the most amazing woman I have ever met."

Drew: meet more women.

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ATTA BOY, BROOKS

It was difficult, but Brooks finally told Desiree he was choosing me.

I know he didn't talk about me specifically, but we all know what he meant.

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BACK OFFA BROOKS

Ugh of course Desiree chooses her first date to be with my boyfriend, Brooks. Yes. MY BOYFRIEND. I love his teeth and he looks like a sleazy dude from an 80's movie. I love him. Stop touching him, Des.

SO UPSETTING!

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WHY DESIREE WHYYYY

What in the hell are these drawings they keep showing her do? It's like she is 12! If I were a dude and I saw one of these, I would be like... AW HELL NO. Which makes me think the producers are pushing this aspect of her so that we all think she might be mentally challenged.

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Desiree loves to camp

Now just checking... but this is the girl who we learned - in an awkward conversation with the bachelor Sean - had to live in tents when she was little because she was so poor, right?

So this exchange was supposed to make me slightly die, right?

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Trying too hard

Is not something that Jonathan did - unless he was trying to be the biggest creep ever...? I was so confused. Obviously he had to go home... but it's too bad we couldn't glean some more dating perspective from him.

Or what about 'that guy seems to be trying to rape me. Definitely don't want to hang out with him ever again'?

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Zak W.

Did the producers make Desiree keep Zak W? I hope not. I hope she kept him for eye candy/amusement. He is special & 100% serious.

I really hope to discover "Drilling Fluid Engineer" is a euphemism for "Porn Actor."

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I was disappointed.

SO WAS I! That Larry got kicked off! I wanted to hear him completely self-destructing some more. He is strange, clearly not 34, and an ER doctor! But like- totally a babe & I think we'd get along. How do I meet him?

My only concern is that he is short - he looked short. I'm not. And I suspect he might want to be a Soap Opera doctor instead of a real one.

But if not: call me, Larry!

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Whoa C. Perkins and Chris Thomas were so cute singing together. C sounds like he is autotuned sometimes - it's crazy! I knew Usher gonna git 'im. I saw it in them sparkly lil Usher eyes.

Shakira is so good at 'I'm really enjoying this performance' face. Like... the best.

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The Voice is back and I still love Blake

How can I not?

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Sean is like... whatever. But I like that he was in love with Catherine so hard that he was in tears about it constantly. That's cool, man.

But hey - were you girls like so disappointed by these 'getting dressed to ask one of deez bitches to marry me' images? I mean that shirtless situation is questionable, right?

I know that's all you care about!

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F*ck a Duck

"I swear to GOD if that thing attacks me I'll literally have a heart attack. It attacked Daniella the other day - she told me!

I dunno. I dunno. It's got its mouth open like it wants to bite something and it's coming at me."

This Jackie chick freaking out over a duck was my favorite Bachelor outtake.

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50 Shades of Awesome

I knew Sean wouldn't keep Ashley- she was just WAY too drunk to get a pass. And way too awesome, really. I mean- I cannot tell you how often I wonder if we need me to start dancing!

I vote for a show that collects all the girls/guys that are too drunk and crazy to make it past the first night & dumps them in a house together to get wild. Not the creeps- just the ones who are too 'fun' for anyone to think the bachelor/bachelorette will choose them as a life partner with whom to start a family. Cause I feel gypped having only gotten to see her antics for one night. Bye Ashley! Hope you get your own show!

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The Voice: Season 3

It's been fun. FINALLY A GIRL WON!!!! I wanted her to- it just made sense.

Thank god the 2 coaches sticking around next year are Blake & Adam... Ceelo's theatrics will be missed... but Usher sings about himself in all his songs, so I bet he'll bring something ridiculous to the table. I continue to be impressed that there is a singing competition show that doesn't make me wish everyone would just die. The Voice is fun. I like fun. It is loose and silly and doesn't take itself too seriously. As visual support I leave you with these lovely shots of Adam playing the guitar solo for Dude Looks Like a Lady. I mean- come on.

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Clearly Deborah - from this season of The Voice - styles herself after Steve Urkel. What I was waiting to see was the Stefan version of Deborah... but maybe she isn't ready.