Secret garden

SON NAEUN

[hayounga]

[exgndjonghyun-deactivated201501]

Orgel [ Naeun & Jonghyun ]

The sky had turned a hideously pale shade of grey, mixed with the swirling white forms of clouds, spilling across its vast expanse, before darkening into the heavy black storm cloud forming above it. He was surprised it hadn’t rained yet; behind the grey sheet, the storm looked so menacing, it made him shiver just looking at it. The wind had picked up, and was blowing his hair wildly over his forehead, the little triangle built by hair gel all but destroyed. 

He walks along the roof top, staring out at the campus. The buildings were low, so he could see far beyond as well, even to the town a few kilometres away. Slowly, he walks towards the edge of the building, and stands with just his toes hanging out over the open air. He wasn’t going to jump, oh no. Jonghyun wasn’t that far gone. But there was a certain thrill in seeing the ground so far below his feet, even though he knew he could reach it in less than a second. The feeling was almost enough to make him giddy. 

[gndnaeun-blog]

Naeun had a strange love for storms, they had always scared her when she was younger but there was something wonderful about conquering fears and there was something even better about standing up to them face to face. She walked up the several flights of stairs that led to the dorm rooftop slowly, she hadn't heard the patter of rain yet so she had a lot of time to waste making her way up there. Eventually, she opened the door and stepped out into the cold air. It was quite dull outside, something she found mesmerising especially on a typical Seoul summers day. Naeun saw somebody on the edge of the roof and felt tempted to turn around and go back inside, she wasn't sure if she was interrupting something. In fact, she wasn't quite sure what to do.

She didn't say anything but she'd learnt something about stepping out of comfort zones and instead she walked forward to where he was stood and sat down on the ledge, her feet hanging into the empty space, right next to him. For a moment she sat there in silence, admiring the scenery and then she looked up to the person she was sat next to, Naeun recognised him from the Student Radio meetings. "What are you doing up here?" she smirked, resting her hands behind her and leaning backwards.

[gndjongsuk-blog]

At Night // Naeun and Suk

Jongsuk was taking a drive at night a lot of things had been playing on his mind. He was struggling being a single parent and work was hard, not to mention his intense feeling of loneliness. He was looking on the street when he saw two large men approach a young girl. Wary of the girls safety he pulled over and watched. She had no shoes and looked a little drunk, the men began to talk to her. Jongsuk got out the car and began to walk towards them. They seemed to be trying to grab the girl. “YAH! Move away that’s my girl,” it was the first thing he could think of. The two men backed of leaving him staring at the young female, her feet looked like they were bleeding. “Are you okay? Where do you stay?” He gently lifted her up into his arms with her permission of course. “I’m a doctor you should let me look at those feet!”

[gndnaeun-blog]

Naeun wasn't quite sure how she had ended up in the situation she was in and she also wasn't sure where one of her shoes had gone but she held the other one in her hand and walked along the gravel floor of downtown Seoul. She had been separated from her friends and she was slightly drunk, being confronted by a group of older boys usually didn't bother her but this time she was alone and they wouldn't leave her alone no matter how hard she tried. Out of the corner of her eye she saw a car pull up and a man get out, she recognised him through the blur of the alcohol, she recognised him from Univeristy. She wanted to run away but she knew he would take care of her, Naeun also thought he was good looking so she stayed put, still clutching her shoe. "Thank you," she smiled at him, her balance faltering slightly "You saved me!" She flung her arms in the air and grinned from ear to ear before hiccuping and leaning against the wall behind her, she was pretty sure she'd end up in a heap on the floor soon. Through her hiccups she tried to answer all of the questions he'd thrown at her "I'm a student at Gangnam Uni," she answered "you work there right?" With that she lifted one of her legs, pointing her feet at the doctor, her expression changing almost immediately to a pout, she hadn't noticed the state they had got into.

[teokisaram]

[gndnaeun-blog]

reckless together;- myoongi + snaeun

Pressure from exams and everyday student life had got Naeun bogged down in a sad, emotional mess. All of her friends were in the same frame of mind too but it seemed to her that they were a little less up for going out and spending a night together, as young people should do. She'd set off on a walk round the campus to clear her head and hopefully to find something more interesting that sitting in her dorm room complaining to the walls about her life; there were parts of the campus she still hadn't seen and it seemed like a perfect time to go and look at them.

Naeun turned left down a corridor that usually went straight onto the dance studios but she'd been there several times before, they were nothing new and with her melancholic mood she wasn't really feeling like going and dancing right now. She followed the halls on and on until she entered a part of the university she had never been in before, this was obviously the home of a completely different major to her; she peered in one of the windows into what looked like a classroom but it was getting late and the lighting did not exactly help her eyesight. Naeun walked straight into the room only to be met by another person who looked like he was in the exact same mood as she was. "Oh, I'm sorry," she bowed towards the boy "I've never been in this part of the campus before I was just intrigued as to what this room is." Naeun smiled slightly and tried to liven the situation; instead of running away she sat down on a desk that was near the door. "You look how I feel," she laughed "Bad day?" Maybe at last she had found someone who had been so held down by school work that was desperate to have a good time, someone to finally save her from her own boredom.

[gndnaeun-blog]

stumbled upon;- bbaekhyun + snaeun

Living on the Fourth floor had sounded like a wonderful start to her time at University, what could be better than a dorm high up in a building looking out over the cityscape? Her mind had been completely changed after she found herself walking up and down several flights of stairs, box after box piled with junk and in that moment she wasn’t quite sure whether she needed it all or if she would miss it if it were to be accidentally misplaced. The pile at the bottom of the stairs had shrunk drastically and there were only a couple left; on at least her 5th time of walking up the stairs, Naeun had completely lost the will to live and her concentration had drifted, as it so frequently did.

She walked into an open door and placed the box down in the middle of the room, sighing loudly to herself, taking a moment to breath before she set off on another venture back down the stairs to retrieve the last of her belongings. With that she looked up and scanned the room, with a squint she noticed the colour had changed and funnily enough none of her boxes were piled up inside of it. Naeun almost froze on the spot her heart dropping when she turned round to face the  door she had just walked in, she picked up the box and over the top of it saw a boy stood at the door.

Flustered, Naeun started to babble “Oh my god!” She moved nervously around the room trying to edge out before she would have to interact with the other person “I’ve got the wrong room, I’m so sorry, I’m just moving in next door.” She bowed politely, and very subtly, the box restricting her movements and with that she suggested that she wanted to leave the room, edging towards the door.

[jindeulie]

✿

[gndnaeun-blog]

quiet curiosity;- lmin + snaeun

[thexafflicted-blog]

[…]

As their discussion progressed, Min had only answered Naeun’s relentless question with one-worded answers, slight movements such as a shrug of her shoulders and even grunts. Honestly, Min didn’t even know why the girl took her precious time to get to know her better.

So in the end, as their class were dismissed and the crowd of students were slowly trickling out of the dance room, Min turned to Naeun and said, “Why?” She pauses. “Why do you want to know me? What’s even so special about me?”

[gndnaeun-blog]

Talking to Min sometimes felt like talking to a brick wall, but with constant attack Naeun thought that perhaps she would be able to break down the boundaries that Min felt against other people; she knew it would be really good for her, her dancing career could progress onto something perfect if she would allow it. "Why?" Naeun responded, with a shrug she sighed a little and look straight at the other girl "Well, I think that you're actually really talented and I think that maybe if you would let me help you, you'd be the best dancer, like, ever." Naeun smiled a big grin at Min and clasped her hands together as she did so.

"Also," she continued "I'm intrigued to find out why you are so reluctant to let me be your friend." Naeun knew she was very loud, brash and maybe a little too upfront but there was really no harm in having a little confidence minus the fact that she scared almost everyone away. "Actually, I really have no idea if you even like me or not," she sulked "I don't like not knowing where I stand with people." In her brain Naeun was kicking herself, she knew that when she started talking she found it difficult to stop and it probably wasn't helping Min in accepting her. With that she stopped and whispered "I'm sorry, I'm a little loud."

[gndeunji-deactivated20140710]

roommates ✛- eunji & naeun

[…]

Eunji was in the middle of doing homework late at night again; it had always been a rather terrible habit of hers to take a long nap in the afternoon. When the sun had already set and it was time for dinner, she’d wake up and go down to eat. Finally as she remembered the uncompleted homework for tomorrow, then she would start doing it. Usually turning on upbeat and fast music would help move her progress on her homework along, but it wasn’t working well for today. As she was in the middle of being exasperated with the problem she was faced with, Eunji was surprised to hear the doorbell ring. Who would ring the doorbell this late at night? Opening the door, she was taken aback to see a petite-looking girl with a suitcase in her hand. “Hi, do you know which room are you looking for…?” 

[gndnaeun-blog]

Naeun was not typically a shy girl but the thought of moving into University accommodation and having to make the best impression possible upon her roommate terrified her; maybe it was more the fact that she was nervous about it that scared her. Either way, she hoped her roommate would be as equally as loud and brash as she was, she couldn't imagine herself getting on too well with anyone else. With a deep breath she pressed the call button of the elevator, her suitcase trailing behind her, she stepped in and pushed the number "4" which would take her up to her new home. Her impression on the accommodation was very positive and that settled her nerves slightly.

She wandered down the corridor after stepping out of the lift, scanning the numbers on the wall and she stopped in front of room 403. Before she rang the doorbell she took a moment to fix her clothes and hair and plastered a polite smile on her face; automatically she stretched her hand out and reached for the doorbell. A girl came to the door, she looked young and the music blaring from the room gave a good impression on her personality. "Hi," Naeun smiled "I think I'm in here with you!" She peered round the girl stood in front of her and looked into the room, clean, she thought, and then went back to her original position, smiling widely.

"Naeun," she held her hand out to the girl "I'm your new roommate!" She giggled and put the handle down on her suitcase, ready to move into the room and start her new life, and hopefully a new friendship.

[gndnaeun-blog]

quiet curiosity;- lmin + snaeun

[thexafflicted-blog]

[...]

NEXT DAY

As usual, Min was earlier compared to the other students as she entered the empty dance studio where her dance class for the day was held. Her class today was just after lunch, and with her spending the whole lunch alone, she decided to come in early.

Sitting off once again in a corner she and some of her classmates had unconsciously labeled as hers, Min couldn’t help but think if that Naeun girl she met yesterday was serious about actually getting to know her dark past.

[gndnaeun-blog]

Dance lessons after lunch were the only dance lessons that Naeun never looked forward to, after lunch dancing round with a full stomach made her severely uncomfortable. However, today, she was looking forward to seeing her new found friend from yesterday and finally getting down to finding out why she always seemed so sad. She walked to the classroom, her bag slung over her shoulder and a group of her friends walking in front of her. She entered the room, a couple of students were dotted around but she spotted Min sat in the same place she was yesterday and with a cheery wave to her friends she sat down right next to her.

"Hello," she whispered, not wanting to disturb the teacher who stood tall at the front of the class "how are you feeling today?" she smiled and crossed her legs, tucking them close up to her chest. Min still looked slightly sad but Naeun was a very determined person and she wouldn't give up too easily. Throughout the lesson she kept trying to interject parts of the conversation she had planned in the breaks in the professors speech.

Whilst they sat in silence, the comments made by Naeun usually ignored, she began to ponder on why Min seemed so sad. Insecurities? She glanced to the girl sat at the side of her in complete silence and frowned, there was nothing there to be insecure about. It definitely could not be her talent because she had more than the whole class combined, Naeun found her confidence in her dance mesmerising. Then what else could it be? With a deep sigh she looked towards Min and pouted before resting her head in her hands. This was going to be hard work.

[balifor]

[gndnaeun-blog]

quiet curiosity;- lmin + snaeun

[thexafflicted-blog]

[...]

She was supposed to go back into her dorm, since her classes were already finished for the day, when a tall and bright girl walked in front of her, facing her. Nodding at the girl’s introduction, Min replies her own name as a form of saying hi. “Min.” Taking the girl’s stuttering and mumbling in stride, she remains silent as Naeun fumbles for words.

Tilting her head slightly as she walked, neither denying nor affirming Naeun's observations, Min says, “Nobody is truly ever ‘okay.’ One is always merely trying to live and not survive.”

[gndnaeun-blog]

She was taken aback by the girls comments on life, surely someone with such talent could not have such a heartbreaking outlook and ideology on life. Naeun grimaced but continued to walk beside Min, her comment had worried her deeply; the belief that nobody was "okay" came as news to her, she seemed to think that she was perfectly okay. "Nobody is "okay"?" she quizzed, "I'd like to think I was okay!" With that she laughed slightly and attempted to brighten the mood.

"Perhaps," she smiled "if you lose that outlook and perhaps think a little bit more…" Naeun paused and stopped mid-sentence, her brash personality pouring out in a mass mess of words. She hadn't wanted to make a bad impression upon herself but it was hard to agree with a comment completely opposite to that of your own, so, she continued "positively upon life, you might even disagree with what you have to say!" She laughed but then stopped abruptly "I mean, that is your own choice, you know, who am I to tell you how to think?"

Min continued to walk towards the dorms and Naeun followed alongside her like a lost dog, even though she was very young she felt the need to look after the quiet dancer. They stopped outside a room, she guessed it was Min's dorm since it was the floor above her own dorm. For a moment they both stood their, silence surrounding them but another of Naeun's much too common giggles happened again. "Look," she reached out and touched Min's shoulder before taking her hand back again in attempt to not come across as too interfering "I'll see you tomorrow! We can talk some more right?" She started off down the corridor looking back towards the girl who was still stood outside of her dorm "I'll find out what's upsetting you in the end!" She waved back at Min and soon disappeared out of sight.

[jomnh-deactivated20140821]

monkey see | hyejeong & minho

[…]

Opening the front door, Minho waited until Hyejeong walked past him before letting the door fall shut—however, from where he stood, Minho could see how many people had shown up. A lot. He knew a good deal of people he saw, since the majority seemed to be upperclassmen, and he smiled and waved from his spot at the door when they noticed him. It was just another Saturday night and nothing really felt wrong about dragging the young girl along with him. A good oppa should expose his dongsaeng to new experiences, right? 

[gndnaeun-blog]

Hyejeong followed quickly alongside Minho, behind him she probably looked like a small child but with a smile on her face she didn't have a care in the world. The fact that he had ever considered to invite her to a party with him had driven her close enough to almost bursting with happiness and now she was going to show up at the door with him. If only her freshman friends had been able to see this, it didn't matter to her though, she was content either way.

"I'm sure I am," she smiled up at Minho, rushing a little to walk right beside him "wait, I'm not cute!" She should have been angry that someone her age was being called cute yet she couldn't help but blush at the mention of it. Hyejeong nodded in agreement with his comments, everyone in her classes managed to bore her, they all acted far too safe for her liking and were very unwilling to join her out on her planned adventures; Minho had helped her in being willing to show her a more exciting side of life in comparison to the one she had been living before.

When the door was opened the room was filled with older students and the confidence that had been overpowering her had suddenly disappeared at the idea of her inferiority in the group. She looked up to Minho for comfort and at the same time a noise of amazement at the environment spilled from her mouth, he was stood still at the door waving at the crowds of people filling up the rooms. A rush of adrenaline took over Hyejeong and she grabbed his arm, tugging on it slightly, "Oppa," she laughed "come on, show me round!" She pulled him through the door and started laughing. This new world looked to be exactly what she had been searching for.

[gndnaeun-blog]

quiet curiosity;- lmin + shyejeong

It wasn't often that the dance teacher would ask some of her students to perform in front of the rest of the class but it seemed today that she was very willing to ask several students to do so. Hyejeong had sat at the back of the classroom avoiding any sort of eye contact or non verbal communication with the teacher, she just didn't have the confidence or effort to dance for everyone today. She was lucky and instead Ga-in picked out several other students; her friend, another boy who she knew but knew nothing about and then a quiet girl who she didn't quite recognise, she was sure she was a classmate but any sort of conversation between her and Hyejeong had completely slipped her mind, if there was any in the first place.

The girl walked up to the front of the class and without any introduction began to dance; the way in which she moved and the confidence that gleamed from her as she enthralled the audience completely blew Hyejeong away, and with a gaping jaw she stared contently at the way in which the girl moved her feet in perfect sync to the music and focused all her attention on how she could be just the same. The performance ended far too quickly for Hyejeong's liking and with that the girl bowed and sat back where she had come from, away from the rest of the group. Hyejeong furrowed her eyebrows and looked through the group at the girl who had just danced and in that moment she made it her mission to find out why her confidence wasn't there as it was in her dancing.

After the class had been dismissed Hyejeong hurried out of the room after the girl that had danced, throwing her bag onto her friend as she left. She jogged down the corridor until she was directly in front of her and whilst walking backwards she held out her hand to shake "Hi, I'm Hyejeong," she smiled "I'm in your dance class? Anyway, I saw you dance and you're really amazing, like really…" She moved to walk alongside the girl who seemed very reluctant to have her as any company "Um," she started up again, looking down at the floor, she was never very good at asking uncomfortable questions "You looked really, I don't know, Sad? Wait that's not the right word, quiet? After your performance, I was wondering if you're okay?" She smiled welcomingly at the girl. It seemed there was a reason that Hyejeong wasn't on the welcoming comity at the University.

[gndnaeun-blog]

paper to person;- ybomi + shyejeong

[gnxbomii]

Now:

Breath in. Breath Out. Breath Out. Bomi stood in front of the dance studio. Her hands hovered over the door handle. One. Two. Three. She counted in her hand before opening the door. Crowds of people were standing in little circles. They were all talking, smiling and having a good time. Never in her life did she see so many people in a dance rooms. There were girls and boys, of all different sizes. Bomi kept her eyes on the ground, almost admiring how clean the floors were unlike her old dance studio. A woman with short hair stood in the front of the room and hushed the dancers. Like a person pressed the mute remote button, a hush of silences fell on the crowd. Feeling even more uncomfortable, Bomi shifted her balance from one foot to another. She felt eyes burning into her head as she bowed at over a 90 degree angle. Saying it in a loudness voice, “Annyeong! Yoon Bomi imnida! Please treat me well.” Looking up, a familiar face appeared in the crowd. She squinted her eyes and almost gasped out loud. It was her penpal. Totally ignoring the teacher, Bomi’s mind just wandered around.  When the teacher stopped her, she threw her bag onto the corner of the ground and tapped her penpal’s shoulder.

“Remember me?” Bomi giggled.

[gndnaeun-blog]

Hyejeong couldn't hold in her shock and when Bomi had tapped on her shoulder, she wrapped her arms around her, giving her a huge hug. The two of them had been very close, even though it had never been in physical contact and Hyejeong, especially, felt it necessary to tell her penpal every detail about her life but it seemed that she, in return had failed to mention that she would be joining the same university as her, maybe she had kept it a surprise on purpose. Either way she was entirely thrilled that a friend, so close to her, would be there physically too, a penpal that she was now able to create real memories with.

"Bomi," she cried clinging into her tightly "you never told me you were coming here?" She tilted her head slightly and frowned towards the younger girl who still looked very timid in front of the class "How come you didn't tell me?" she laughed and nudged the girls shoulder lightly before stepping away, back into her group of fellow dancers. She hadn't wanted to make Bomi seem uncomfortable by not including her but she also didn't want to come across as too clingy, both to her penpal and too the class, the class were only aware of her more cool image. 

"We all have to dance right now," Hyejeong sighed slightly "but we can meet up after this lesson for sure, I'll wait for you outside and I can show you round! You are new here, right?" She patted her new friends shoulder and walked over to a boy in her class before she started stretching. It was time to dance.

[gndnaeun-blog]

paper to person;- ybomi + shyejeong

[2 years ago in middle school]

There hadn't been much at school that Hyejeong had actually been willing to participate in but there was one project that had caught her attention and had decided that she'd actually take part, for once. Pen pals; she'd always fancied writing letters to someone very far away though, she wasn't quite sure what they'd talk about, if they'd have anything in common or if they'd even continue writing letters for a long time. But, nevertheless, she walked to the front of the class and received a name and an address from her professor. Yoon Bomi, Australia.

Hyejeong picked up a pen and got out a decorated piece of paper and stared at it for while before even being able to get started on what to write to Bomi.

Hi, Bomi! I guess you've probably heard I'm your new pen pal, Hyejeong, from South Korea. You're from Australia, right? Must be warm there...

She stopped and sighed, scrunching up the paper and taking another piece out from the packet on her desk. After several hours she had finally written up a letter that had explained a little bit about herself, her love for dance and was satisfied. For years after that Bomi and Hyejeong kept in contact, their shared passion for dance being a common topic in most of their letters. Though, she had never planned on meeting her pen pal.

[present day at gangnam university]

Advanced Group was one of the times of the week in which Hyejeong got to socialise with all of her fellow dancers, they'd all created a large bond between them but dynamics were easily adapted when new members joined, and it was the member that had joined on this certain day that had made her stop in her tracks.

When the girl had introduced herself to the class, her name sprung thoughts through Hyejeong's mind. "That's my pen pal." She thought to herself.