Thoughts on 2018/2019 Season
Actually, I am supposed to be on a figure skating fast because I want to take a break, take a step back, and remove my feelings from this sport. It’s helped me a lot this week. But I think before I refast, I want to say I’m just so glad this season is finally over. The way the corruption of this sport escalated was beyond what I even expected. I knew about the corruption, the politicking, the amusement of the way judges score skaters, however, I didn’t think it took less than 1 season for it to get to a new level. I see skaters getting low 80s to mid 90s throughout 1 season. I see robbing everywhere. I see selective calls. I know it will not change even after this season ended, but having this off season will allow me to breathe.
Over the past weeks of grieving about World Championships 2019 Men’s event results, I am now in a mix of stages among bargaining/depression/acceptance. I think I ranted too much on twitter and Planet Hanyu last two weeks that I don’t think I need to talk about my denial or anger stages.
There were many what ifs that went through my mind during these couple of weeks.
“What if Yuzu was never injured? not at cor 2018, not at nhk 2017, or not even his many other injuries that he’s decided to never share with the public? He would probably have been invincible by now.” But that is such an unrealistic and greedy expectation for an elite skater. Also, Yuzu is a human who simply makes the most out of what he has. I don't want to think of him as invincible or superhuman. We are all human who think we are subhuman trying to be superhuman. Yuzu is already inspirational by being his full potential. He allows me to love both the weak Yuzuru and the strong Yuzuru.
“What if I never discovered Yuzu in 2016? What if I never discovered figure skating in 2010? When I first came to know Yuzu I thought because he won so much, the sport actually rewards talent. After a while I slowly discovered the ugly truth that even when he did win a lot in his life, he’s been robbed and underscored chronically. It was he who earned those titles, snatched those scores off from the judges’ dirty hands, challenged the system, and fought his way to be above the scoring corruption and above the sport. So when I found out the truth about what this sport really is, I really wished I never knew about it.” But then to know Yuzu is also one of the best things that happened to me. He inspired me as a person in so many ways. And to know Yuzu means I have known what true figure skating is. There is real figure skating in Yuzuru Hanyu and the figure skating that ISU is promoting.
“What if he never won at PyeongChang? That might have been better for me to quit watching figure skating at that time." But that would be super selfish and stupid. The gold medal is one of the best compensations that happened to Yuzu throughout his competitive life as a skater.
“What if he retired after PC? The sport doesn’t deserve him. Everyone benefited from his presence except the man himself.” But I am not Yuzu and I can’t walk his journey. I can’t feel his pain or happiness so how would I know he won’t still enjoy his difficult road ahead.
“What if Yuzu changes the way he skates? What if he tries to go with Nathan’s or Vincent’s strategy? The system doesn’t judge program components correctly or penalize incorrect techniques, so why bother following the rules when you’re not rewarded? Or "what if he changes his nationality to Canada, Japan doesn’t deserve him anyway?” But I realize from Yuzu’s interviews that while he hates losing the most, he would never change himself in order to win. I realize that it is as hard for Yuzu to empty his program for the jumps as Nathan delivering a complete program. Likewise, it is as hard for Yuzu to cheat his techniques as Vincent trying to correct his. And even if Yuzu did all of these things Nathan or Vincent did, he isn’t an American to get this treatment. Yuzu isn’t the one who should change, should lower his standard. It is the ISU, the judges, the tech panelist, the federations. Yuzu does not need a new passport to win. He did it before to be beyond the corruption, he can possibly do it again.
After bargaining so much, I realized none of the what ifs will do any good for Yuzu, for the other skaters, for the sport, or myself. I was led to a stage of depression.
I guess to many spectators, the scoring discourses on social media and among fandoms seem very silly or “not that deep”. But as someone who thoroughly invest my time, energy, and emotion as a fan for it, I find the necessity in having these voices so that even if the scores don’t stand or the system collapses, the true figure skaters can be remembered, the message of unfairness can be reached to new fans. Seeing myself, who is this much invested into the sport just as a fan, I wonder how much more the many figure skaters, who’ve gone through such pressure and discipline, financial hardship and injuries, emotional breakdowns and sacrifices, have been robbed of their potential titles/scores/sponsorships.
The problem I’m seeing is not only the skaters who don’t benefit from the corruption are negatively affected, the skaters who benefit from the corruption also get hate from many people. Look, I don’t hate the American skaters like Nathan/Vincent/Bradie or the Russian skaters from Eteri camp/Samarin...etc. When I don’t like someone’s skating I am usually just indifferent to them, meaning I don’t bother following them. That’s simple; if you don’t like something, you stop watching it. The problem is these skaters are being shoved into my faces and the way they are being overscored robbed me of my enjoyment for the sport because I find it unfair. That’s also very simple. So I hate to see people generalizing all of the rants are coming from a place of biasness or antis. That is not true. Also, as soon as you are a fan of certain skater, in my case a Yuzuru Hanyu’s fan, you are automatically being labeled as a sore loser or hater. The thing is, many fans who truly study figure skating would agree that the scores don’t match with what are being seen. But it happens that they might be a smaller part of a fandom and don’t get too vocal about this. So instead of seeing everyone as an obsessive fanyu, perhaps the reason many of them fight so hard is to see someone like Yuzuru Hanyu, who is the epitome of a figure skater, gets rewarded deservedly. Perhaps it’s because we value great technique and great skating and the skaters who won happen to not have those? I think it is fair to say a lot of people would get hurt because their favorite skaters did not win and the initial reaction could be a bit overwhelming. That’s normal. But if what they are witnessing in the sport that led to their criticism are fair, they should have the right to vocalize their criticism in order for justice to be heard, especially the rulebook to back their criticism.
Yet over and over, no matter how reasonable many people have been. No matter how much effort in putting up videos to compare skaters’ programs or to explain the discrepancies in the way the tech panel called or didn’t call certain elements, the ISU and general public decide to be ignorant about it. They create their own narratives or put up media play to benefit themselves. They take down videos to remove the evidences. I even think of proposals on how to change the scoring system/format. Maybe the skaters shouldn’t get the scores right after they skate? Maybe we should only have 1 panel of the same judges? Maybe the judges/tech need more time to review the elements and program components? Maybe ice scopes should be inplemented for all jumps and in all countries. Every single element will be put into video cuts for the judges and tech to review and mark the bullets accordingly so the GOEs will autopopulate? The definitions in the rulebooks need to be given more objective, quantative metrics based on collective data or stats? Maybe the scores should be temporarily announced 2 hours after the competition (if the scores get announced later, the competition will be shortened) and the public can vote for what scores need to be reviewed. They can ask the judges to write a review at the end of the day on why they score the elements/PC and if the public do not agree they judges will get a strike. After 3 strikes in their career, the judges will be banned from judging? If any fed decides to bribe the public, at least someone can report it? I thought about all of these possibilities...
And I realize the products are not going to change as long as the creator isn’t willing. There will always be some loopholes.
I am slowly accepting all of this, what I cannot do and what I can do. Accepting neither means that I am agreeing with the results or scores nor normalizing the way the sport plays out. I only know that I cannot change the way ISU/feds politicking or how the general public’s view about certain skaters/achievement stans bandwagon on the glory of its beneficiaries' achievements. But what I know is I will not give them what they want: my attention/money/support. I don’t want to give attention to the undeserving skaters whom I feel like they try to promote. Rather than giving these skaters attention through my ranting, instead, I can just go back to how I should, which is stop watching them. It will be hard since Yuzu will be competing against some of these skaters and that I will follow his career as long as he allows me to, which makes it inevitable that I would see other skaters somehow. But if I would just really ignore, it would allow me to stop feeding on my hatred/bitterness toward other skaters, who aren’t bad people and are pretty talented per se, and just support Yuzu as his fan. I want to spread the love so that even if he perhaps might not always win or get the highest scores on paper, his greatness could still be felt and seen. Because of the love that is spread for Yuzu on twitter, Olympic Channel acknowledges him as the biggest star. Laureus twitter now actively tweets about him. Figure Skating is such a low profile sport but Yuzu is often compared to other greats like Rogers Federer or Tiger Woods (lol) or even Ronaldo by commentators. That shows how he really beyond this sport.
At the end of the day, I console myself that whatever Yuzu has achieved does not even define everything about how great he is as a skater. So I will just try my best to enjoy his career when I can.
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