I once stumbled upon this term when I was reading one of the books that I read during this quarantine period. Surprisingly enough, I got intrigued enough to search it in the web just to confirm its very existence. I was so amazed. Man, never in my life had a word perfectly describe my situation: ronin.
The second time I read this word was maybe, just maybe, one of Murakami’s short stories. I felt so cool reading it the second time around. The familiarity and the understanding it gave me.
Although, I must admit it was only cool to see and hear it, but to actualize it? NAH. Just nah. It felt funny but most importantly, I felt lost. I am aimless. Being an academic ronin is only good if there’s a slightest hope of getting to a school. But even with that, there’s not much an assurance to it.
It’s quite late for this blog post. Well, there’s nothing else I should do at this hour, so here it goes.
I have always believed that everything happens for a reason. Undoubtedly, it is. There will always be a reason - it’s just a matter of whether the reason is valid or anything. And to be honest, I think it is good for me to believe that there is a valid reason for YouTube to place productivity and college-related videos along my feed today. It is the algorithm, no further questions.
It now puts me in a position to think whether have I been diligent enough to prepare myself for what is to come - college.
And you know what, I’ve been battling with how I should put up with the activities I’ve placed myself in - mostly hobbies. Hobbies that I’ve just immersed myself in this past few months. I tried to schedule things out (days when I should study French, paint, journal, and even play an instrument). Apparently, it didn’t work so well. I spend so much time in journalling that I couldn’t even finish a spread in one sitting. Learning French was convenient for me in the first month I tried learning it - and now I feel like I’m all over the place with all the oui’s to all the hobbies I felt I was deprived of when I used to be younger.
It’s just now that I feel I could ditch all of it at a moment’s notice. And it’s sad. I really thought that I could at least give it a try and maybe get at least the smallest of consistency in my life. However, adulting gets in the way. No, I mean it’s inevitable unless I d**.
I don’t want to make this post in a tone that sets me off, but I guess I just have to properly (I wish I could do it instantaneously but I couldn’t, I know) bid myself to my hobbies slowly. Retreating from giving in to the pleasures these hobbies provide. Sure, maybe when I have the free-est of time, that’s when I’ll give it a go.
Now, aside from being hopeful for what is to come, I also want to push myself into being productive as to achieve the goals I set for my own. I think I should start little by little and eventually, add things to my list when I felt the urge to do so.
In the end, I feel like college’s somewhere between near and far. It’s just a matter of time, really.
Thanks Elliot Choy for the motivation.
I also want to place this as an end quote for myself and if ever someone would come across this post.
“Have no regrets in the sixteenth second.” - Kyle Martin
I have almost forgotten the existence of this account. It’s just recently that I was able to take a hold of this account again. I never even remembered my log-in details, to start.
I do not really know what to put in here actually. Perhaps, a life update? I mean there isn’t a single person who even cares what I think.. (at least, on the internet)
Anyways, here is the life update no asked for.
I’m currently on my last days of vacation and waiting until my senior year starts on Tuesday. I believe I should be reviewing for CET’s by this time, but my lazy ass won’t let me.
I did a quick run through of my previous posts here in Tumblr and all I can say is IT IS AWFUL.
Like seriously, all I did in the past years was to actually dwell in romantic stories? I could’ve done better lmao.
Uh, I guess that’s all?
Well, this is uncalled for, but I really like the indie music scene now! I’ve watched them play and in a course of 10 months? I never felt so alive (in terms of my music inclination). I am hopeful for the months (and hopefully years!) to come that several indie artists would come and perform here in the south.
lol. i know how it's unusual it is to open my tumblr but yeah ; ~ ;
don't look at my fugging face. - . -
so yeah. im doing my english script and it annoys me like wth. im cramming and i just cant -.-
many things happened. got a new crush and i like him so much much much much much much. i like him better than all of the crushes i had. i mean srysly, he's so thoughtful, so good at playing guitar, can make me laugh, can make me smile like there's no tomorrow, can make me feel loved and worthy. plus not just that, he's so sweet. he's also protective, plays basketball (y'all guys know that i'm a basketball addict, right? :3) didn't know that he's on the friend zone all this time. we're so close. he got everything.
and yeah not just that. 21st foundation did really go well. i mean, in letran, it's not enjoyable. we got a tons of booth but we're not allowed to go out of the classrooms since we still hold classes. but in cdbs, feel free. go wherever you want, go with whoever you want. and i just can't forget the foundation week bc it's very memorable. the zagu booth held alot of memories for me and glenn. the day he admitted he likes me, and i liked him back.. the very day when he gave me his first treat as my crush. and it felt so good. i just can't let him go. and i won't let him go. btw, the pic was in the night sky cinema. t'was the night where i got to sit with him. but i kept calm and yet deep inside my heart's going too fast. it's beating way swiftly. so kilig that night <3
everytime i remember those days, it really made me happy. my words aren't enough to express my thoughts about us. we had so many memories, good memories. but i won't forget who made all these things possible. and it's Him. My Father. My Loving Father.
O Lord, I love you with all my heart, all my mind, and all my soul. I thank You for these blessings You gave me throughout these continuous days of my life. Grant that I may continue to serve You with the Holy Joy You gave to us Bosconians. Amen.
And as i end this post, i hope that i could again maintain my blog. i love you blog. see you soon.
Hi guys! Confirmed na po na marerelease ang book kong Pag Ibig Thingy. Sana ma share niyo sa mga friends niyong sawi at inlove. Thank you po! #pagibigthingy
Minsan bang sumagi sa isip mo kung sino ang mga taong kasama mo dati na wala na ngayon? Mga taong wala dati pero kasama mo ngayon? Mga taong akala mo hindi mo kaya kapag nawala? Mga taong akala mo e makakasama mo pa rin hanggang ngayon?
Hindi ba’t nakakatuwang isipin na sa likod ng lahat ng...
"Pagtuunan mo ng pansin yung mga taong nagmamahal sayo hindi nakatingin ka lang sa taong walang pake sayo"
(via cleyaneccstro) true. why would you settle for someone who doesn't care about you when there's someone who treats you like a royalty? sometimes, we also need to care for the people who's there for us all the time. they also have feelings. try to remember your value.
Pagkatapos nung prayer, national anthem, school hymn, at iba pa, tinawag na si Sir Psalms para sa Morning Talk.
Nagkwento si Sir Psalms.
Eto yung kwento niya:
Sa Manila, mayroong isa amo na may aso. Sabi niya sa aso niya "Hayaan mo dots(i forgot the name of the dog sarreh), pag ako yumaman ibibili kita ng napakadaming tbone steak. Sa sobrang dami, kahit natutulog ka may kinakain ka pa din."
Tumango na lang yung aso. Pero sa loob loob niya "Okay na ako dito sa buto ko. Contented na ako dito."
Then dumating yung araw na yumaman nga yun amo niya. As promised, binili niya nga ng napakadaming tbone steak yung aso niya. "DOTSSS! Ito na yung t-bone steak na sinasabi ko sayo oh!" Pilit na binibigyan nung amo si dots pero ayaw ni dots, gusto niya lang eh yung kinasanayang buto niya.
Day by day, pinipilit nung amo si dots na kainin yung tbone steak pero ayaw nya pa din. Lumipas ang maraming taon at SA WAKAS! Sa wakas pumayag na din si dots kainin yung t-bone steak!
Unti unti siyang lumapit dun sa tbone steak, yung parang nag-aalangan. Habang gumagapang papunta dun sa tbone steak, lumilingon siya dun sa buto niya, baka daw kasi paglingon niya wala na.
Nung malapit na siya sa tbone steak (mga 10 cm), he took his last glance unto the bone. "Pag di ko to nagustuhan, babalikan kita." he thought.
Little, he put his paw into the tbone steak sauce. He tasted it, "Hmm mukang masarap naman eh."
Kumain siya ng kapirangot. ALAM MO YUNG FEELING NA "FINALLY THE FOOD OF MY DREAMS CAME TRUE!"? Ganun yung feeling ni dots!
After that day, araw araw na siyang kumakain nung tbone steak.
Dapat di natin ayawan yung mga oppurtunities na meron tayo. Dapat once in a while, lumabas tayo sa safe zone natin. Dapat magtake chances tayo.
Di naman malaki ang mawawala kung i-try natin diba? ;)
Kaya dapat go lang ng go! ;)
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eh ba't kaya siya ayaw niya ako maging kaibigan? ;(
Please fire me. I am a cleaner and today a woman pointed me out to her child and said ‘that’s why you have to do well in school - so you don’t end up like her’. I go to one of the top ten universities in the UK and I’m only cleaning to fund my studies.
