Failing Musician/Bee Fan

I'm a 22 year old musician who is learning how to adult on his own for the first time. Also a big fan of bee's.

[goldenwhitbee-blog]

Day 2 - Wave

So Day 2, I'm surprised I've made it this far. I have a tendency to forget. How I found out she had moved on was horrible, I had decided to go to my favourite local venue to see some bands with the guitarist in my band. We got there early and decided to quickly nip to another pub that was close by that already had bands on to fill the time before the start of the sets at the venue. We got there after a quick walk and quickly grabbed a pint and started watching the bands. During the change over we sat down and started chatting. Moments later I was tapped on the shoulder to see one of my best friends and his girlfriend, followed by 2 more of our close friends, then 2 more , then 2 friends I hadn't seen in years then finally Her. She was holding hands with this guy I had never seen before as soon as they saw me she quickly walked off and I could see all the faces of my friends drop. They clearly where not expecting to see me. The rest of the night is a story in it's self and i'll get to that one day.. That's was how I found out about him and her. It's hard to word how I felt, specially as just 4 days earlier she told me she loved me still, and the week before we had a a perfect date. This was about a month ago now. So today is a weird one, Over the last few days I've been having a rough time dealing with everything that has happened and it's being getting me down (hence why I started this blog). This is after a week of feeling positive and really starting to feel better I get hit with this wave of sadness that I can't seem to understand. At the start things that would send me into a bad mood would be seeing photo's of her and him together, doing things that we did together once. Going out for a meal with her parents like we used to, going out to the pubs we used to drink at, that kind of stuff. But as time is going by they are slowly starting to hurt less and less. I would also wrestle with myself trying to work out what I could have done differently to change how things went and over think the scenario again and again wracking my brain looking for a solution that simply doesn't exist but I haven't done that in a week or two. So this time I can't work out why I am sad, I just am. I've not seen or heard anything about them, nothing. It's like a wave of sadness just washed over me. I'm trying to keep busy to keep my mind off it all, It kind of works sometimes. Maybe tomorrow will be better?

[goldenwhitbee-blog]

I know your working all the time and that's fine with me. The problem is I'm getting o so lonely

“Birch” - Sarpa Salpa

[goldenwhitbee-blog]

Day 1 - Lunch

So today is day one of blogging. A for warning I have always struggled with English and writing so apologise if I never make sense. Im currently on my lunch at work this will most likely when I update this blog. Most lunches I go for a walk, its good to get some fresh air, stretch the legs and if im honest eat away from others. Never been a fan of eating in public. Of course I do when needed but I try to avoid it a often as possible. Speaking of food todays lunch is a spinach and ham sandwich, not the most exciting but it will do. That been said rewind 2 months and I would have never eaten spinach in fact I didn't eat alot. For years I got into a routine of living a certain way and the same with my eating, I knew what I liked and that was that I didn't try anything new, I point down refused. Since breaking up with my girlfriend (thats a massive post in it's self and seemed a bit too much for day 1) and moving into a place on my own I decided I needed to change. Since then I have been on a mission to try as much as I can to eat alot healthier. Safe to say so far so good, I've not brought a take away since and have good proper meals every night, from quorn to tuna steak to salads. Bare in mind that my previous diet was takeaways and oven pizzas mostly. The only negative I have noticed is that my wallet is suffering more, it turns out eating healthy and buying fresh fruit and veg is more expensive then junk food. But I guess its better for me in the long run. If the weather is too bad outside to go for a walk I tend to read, my current book is "A sting in the Tale by Dave Goulson" so far im really enjoying it! I think this will do for Day 1 I hope we will see but If anyone has any good easy recipes, im all ears! -E

[goldenwhitbee-blog]

Hi I guess?

So this is pretty new to me, I’ve known about Tumblr for years and years but have never had a reason to tumblr? tumble?

Anyway after recently come out of 6 year relationship I’m currently trying to work out how to function as an adult on my own. A friend suggest writing it down so I guess that’s what this will be, a place to get things off my chest.

Apart from that I will probably talk about music, bass guitar and bee’s a hell a lot.

That’s about it I guess.

- E