Dae looked up, thinking about the question. “Hmm… I think I’d like ‘and man the great light’ a little bigger, in like… a more bold font? And the rest smaller in some sort of pretty cursive? I’d have to look at some examples, though, I don’t really know anything about tattoos, only that I want one.” She giggled, putting a strand of hair behind her ear.
scarlett let out an all but subtle laugh. she was interested --- in the tattoo and in the girl. mostly, her laugh --- a SINGLE noise --- matched dae’s giggle. “ lucky for you, i know a lot about tattoos, “ she played, leaning down to put the end of the cigarette out on the street. “ i’ll draw some stuff up for you, yeah ? you can stay here, if you want, but it’ll take me a minute. “ it was something for flirting. usually, she just let them go home. but why not try ?
it wasn’t that the thought had never crossed his mind before; only that it was an ill taste q preferred not to harbour. and now he’d brought it on himself; expecting the answer, acknowledging it, and shoving it into the open air all the same. of course they could.
and maybe, she already had. like the woman on the screen had found some way to tangle herself up in someone new. quincy hadn’t seen liara in such a LONG time. surely she’d felt his absence the way he’d felt hers. with immediacy and too much strain to swallow. but then, maybe, she’d learned to breathe easy again. found some other way to go on, alone or in the arms, and jackets, and late-night kitchen adventures of someone new.
after years, he didn’t think he’d have it in himself to blame her. or even to be b i t t e r. it was a dull hope that lived somewhere in the depths; buried under pieces of him that screamed that ‘guys like them‘ weren’t worth waiting for. could never be.
“do you ever wonder if your efforts, no matter how kind or honest, will never see you redeemed for the things you’ve done?”
aaron ordered a fourth drink as quickly as he could and his fingers made a desperate grasp for the AMBER liquid that beckoned his attention above all else. even quincy, despite his new friend. or maybe because of quincy --- meaning, if this were the conversation, he would need three more at least.
he couldn’t imagine he knew the other’s wealth or misfortune, but the same could be said in reverse. the man, like any other man, would surely distance himself upon the confession that aaron was a murderer, that he lived a very loose code of conduct and quenched his thirst with only three things ( maria, liquor, and homicide ). he took a long drink before looking back up at the television. could he answer honestly ?
“ you have no idea, “ he muttered. he brought the glass to his lips again with a shrug. “ i stopped trying to redeem myself. if god’s real, then i’m already going to hell, “ he snorted.
Dae’s smile got wider. She knew she was about to go overboard, but she usually did when someone asked her anything about something she loved.
“So it’s from the book ‘Forgive Me, Leonard Peacock,’“ she began, her hands already moving expressively. “I like to think of it as the modern ‘Catcher in the Rye.’ It’s about this guy, Leonard Peacock, who’s bullied by his ex best friend, so he decides to kill him and then himself? But he’s writing letters to himself from the future? Like from his future wife and daughter and father in law, and in his ideal future, most of the world is underwater because of global warming, and the family mans this lighthouse? They do it for oncoming boats, but they have never seen a boat besides their own, so no one is looking. Then, when Leonard is about to kill himself, he explains to his favorite teacher about the letters, and the teacher asks ‘Do you ever feel like you’re sending out a great light, but no one is looking?’ And it just…”
Dae realized that she had been talking for way too long and chuckled nervously before saying “So, yeah, there’s the context in a nutshell.”
the idea didn’t appeal to scarlett particularly, because she’d read catcher in the rye in high school and didn’t get the hype. she didn’t understand, at all, what big lesson it was supposed to teach her. why choose that for a high school book ? but if other people liked it, then that was the beauty of literature. besides, holden caufield didn’t speak for forgive me, leanoard peacock. still, she likely wouldn’t seek it out. but she liked that the other made it her own and a positive message seemed behind it, so who was she to care ? “ okay, cool. you got any edit specifications ? --- like, line breaks, font format, stuff like that. “ she took two more, quicker puffs from her cigarette, then leaned down to put it out, carrying it between her fingers until it found the trash can inside the shop. she wanted to destroy herself, not the everyone else.
“ so, tell me what you think. “ jason insisted the other to stay put on their place as ey pulled out a guitar from the corner of eir room. ey then started to play a rather simple but beautiful melody with the instrument in eir hands. completely focused on the playing, ey paid little to no attention to eir guest before finally stopping for a second. ey glanced over at the person, tilting eir head slightly as expecting a reply from them.
for months now, she had known em. jason had played simple, beautiful melodies to her grateful ears since she was seven months younger. she woke up, panicked, and there ey were, a year and five months older than her in this new place. ey guided her. so she always listened to eir guitar playing. she spread her legs out on his bed, uncaring of the personal space that they had long ago abandoned. “ damn, “ she reacted, a SLIGHT grin on her face before she fell deadpan. “ if we weren’t so painstakingly gay. “
it would be easier to parch herself, cracked lips and dry throat, on knowing him and knowing herself. to go hungry in an unknown land out of principle. she’d been smart enough at this point to not suffocate completely in the shared smoke of every cherry lit cone they passed back and forth. her, chattering until she remembered to be silent. him, inside of a haze with no purpose but to remind her not to choke. she cleared her throat, her fingers just that much warmer than they were before. “ are you telling me something else is more important than whatever dumb movie we said we were gonna watch ? ” her smile threatened to blister her lips. “ say it isn’t so. ”
aaron cracked a grin, wide and unmistakable; the kind that only maria was ever lucky enough to see. the same could be said for the way she smiled at him, sometimes. the same could be said for drunken nights and hands meeting in the popcorn bowl. last time, they had let their hands linger. and since then, aaron had been afraid of her. or rather, what he might not be able to keep hidden. he was okay with secrets, but he still ruined parker’s ninth birthday by blabbing. he leaned in, elbows on the TABLE like his mom told him not to. “ nothing is more important than you, “ he offered, still grinning. if he grinned, they got to pretend it wasn’t the first honest thing he’d said all day. a walking liar --- about his life, about his job, about his feelings. he lied to her the most. if parker were around, he’d lie to her the second most. “ what movie’d you pick ? “
LORDT. i am fired ik. click to read more about SCARLETT ADAMS.
· • ⸰ ✴ KRISTEN STEWART. AGENDER, SHE/HE. — have you heard of scarlett jean adams ? the tattoo artist is twenty-four years old and it appears that they are intelligent and irresponsible. even after 7 months here, no one knows that they are a recovering addict. but then, no one really knows anything around here.
i don’t want this life ( tw for drug use/addiction, death, road collision, PROCEED W/ CAUTION Y’ALL )
ok so she was born in amsterdam, which was pretty great for her little artistic butt
she started drawing and painting when she was four and she got rly fucking good at it like whoa yk child prodigy status
her talent and smarts led her into special schools for like her entire life
she requested to her parents that she go to a normal secondary school tho bc she just wanted to live life ? she was like i’ll take classes 3 grades above me just pls stop cutting me off from the world of everyone else
she was 14 when she decided she wanted to use her art to be a tattoo artist n she actually took on an apprenticeship at a pretty good firm
when she was 16, she was in the passenger seat n her bf was driving . n they endured a shit as car crash damn . they were swerving to avoid a cyclist and ran head first into a bus
her injuries were minor tbh but also rly got in the way. she broke her wrist on one hand and several fingers on the other, as well as her collarbone. her boyf at the time..... fell into a coma . and his parents kept him in that coma for 9 MONTHS
that was a grueling 9 months for her, but at the end they decided to pull the plug bc there were just no signs of him recovering
this all fucked her up a bit tbh. she stopped drawing, tattooing, doing well in school . her parents tried to send her to a therapist, but she kept insisting she didn’t need one and just got a job at a local convenience store, wasting away in her depression/ptsd tbh
unfortunately, with her injuries also came taking prescription painkillers . she got addicted to them but she was able to keep it lowkey at first
eventually, after a while, they weren’t enough to get her high so she got hooked on stronger stuff ( i.e. heroin lmao )
she lost like 5 yrs to just being a ghost and a junkie . however, several months ago she started getting a little bit back into her drawing
the night she started drawing again was the night of the eclipse like it just drew her in
she joined a narcotics anon program but kept relapsing so it was just blech
she woke up abt 7 months ago as a roommate to jason ( @jjascn ) and after figuring some stuff out, she sort of settled here and has looked at it like a second chance ( sometimes lmao ), so she’s been sober for a while now and she’s back to drawing/tattooing
she doesn’t know what’s real but she’s pretty determined to not waste this life
ANYWAY if u made it to the end tysm !! so sry abt the length of that lol
Dae lit up before saying “’And man the great light, even when no one is looking.’” She felt herself about to gush, so she tried to hold it back, but some of it leaked through. “It’s the last line from my favorite book, and in context it’s even more beautiful, but even out of context it hits home, so I want it on my body forever.”
scarlett nodded. she liked the quote. she’d never heard it before, but it seemed meaningful. she was hesitant to ask for the CONTEXT, of course, because if it was something that personal, maybe she didn’t want to share it. but usually, in order to get it right, she needed the whole story. she had to be able to relate to make it a good piece. “ so what’s the context ? “ she finally asked as she took another drag of the cigarette.
quincy glanced back at the other. he was honest with no one, these days. but if he was going to project his life onto soap opera characters, aaron perhaps would be the one to understand it best. they’d already bonded over the dark circles and unspoken WEIGHT of the world.
“don’t you think she could do better?” he settled for, pretending he didn’t find the words just slightly b i t t e r on his tongue. the other had had more to drink than he had, maybe he wouldn’t notice it. but q would pretend for everyone but himself that he didn’t find his father in the man on screen. that with the nature of shows like these, he couldn’t see a man searching greener pastures. like he had, and like they all did.
quincy didn’t mean it about maria, but he immediately applied it there. she could do better. she could do better than parker, too. but aaron easily thought more of his best friend than himself. which was why it made no fucking sense that he ever pursue her. even though he had. sort of. at least, she knew him well enough to know. he’d been quiet when he couldn’t lie to her, innocent by OMISSION --- or at least just not guilty of that crime.
aaron nodded. “ of course she could, “ he shrugged. “ they always can. at least when it’s guys like him. “ there was a pause as he raised his glass to his lips, then into the drink before downing the remaining liquid, “ and guys like us. “
it wasn’t as if the other didn’t have a point. but addressing it in truth only seemed the highlight the disconnect between aileen and the way that maybe she ought to be. “would you believe me if i said i wasn’t?”
no, aileen was simply a fan of the quiet. of the silence broken only by those who wished to shed their own shades of being onto the screen. she cared little for the films as a concept, and everything for the glimpses into any life but her own. the abandoned one had only served as a familiar figure, and then a home to the glimpses of – her.
scarlett felt like she discovered a secret. she was nowhere near closer to knowing where she was or who these people were --- if they were real. if she were dead. and if she was, did that make this purgatory ? hell ? the underworld ? no answers. and evasive ones from the redhead. but who didn’t like a puzzle ? an undeniably cute one, at that. “ yeah, i would, “ she said honestly. she enjoyed the films, but she was often seen at both places and had no specific affinity toward the movies. it was the theatre she loved. it structured itself around her heart, walls in chambers that only artists could see. she was always just LOOKING for another one. “ especially if you explained. “ she cracked a smirk at the corner of her mouth, less than graceful, but nothing short of appropriate.
wow here we go. click to read more about AARON PADDOCK.
· • ⸰ ✴ JAMIE DORNAN. CIS MALE, HE/HIM. — have you heard of aaron kurt paddock ? the bodyguard is 29 years old – or at least that’s what they say. it appears that they are sharp and tainted. even after two years here, no one knows that they have a body count. but then, no one really knows anything around here.
ok his life is tragique. sry bout it ( speaking of .. tw for death/murder, domestic murder/abuse, child abuse, horror/gore ment, mental illness/drug ment/use )
PHEW ok so this tol bean was born in bonham, texas --- a terrible little republican town where a boy did not fit in
to add to that wonderful tidbit, his father was kind of an accidental shitbag. he didn’t really know the effects it would have on aaron, being so young n all, but he was a horror movie buff and like . he waned to pass it on to his son
however he started WAY TF too early with that shit and aaron’s just this like 3 year old kid watching some gory ass horror shit.
so he’s like . as you can imagine, that fucked him up pretty bad
he grew up with his mom and his dad and his mom tried her best, but man she had to support them and work and she was a nurse so it was hectic
this meant she also couldn’t really . monitor what her husband was doing and lbr here
he was smart tho so he sort of just grew up internalizing most of that and lashing out with like occasional sadistic/masochistic tendencies . so that festered into mental illness rly, along with his genetic predisposition rip aaron
went to like middle school ish with maria ( @voyagcrs )
aaron is a pretty quick learner so he can kind of do most of what he puts his mind to . pretty average at most things yk
an ok guy. not the best, but rly could have turned out worse . loves his mom, but wants to kill his dad
woke up here two yrs ago ( with maria lmao ) and has been a bodyguard for her game and tbh ... has killed ppl n is lowkey thriving w/ THAT
so anyway like this and i’ll hit u up to plot w/ aaron !!
“Just browsing,” Dae admitted. “There’s a quote I was hoping to get on my shoulder, and I’d love to see what fonts you do. Are any your favorites?” This quote was really important to Dae, and she wanted it to look nice, but also be legible and have an impact.
scarlett brought her cigarette up to her lips, eyes locked on the other. there was a safe enough DISTANCE that she felt comfortable, and it was respectable. the girl was e a s y on the eyes, too. always helped when hours were spent between the customer and the artist. she nodded as she exhaled the smoke. ah, calligraphy. she took a class on it, but dropped it half way through. didn’t come back after academic probation. “ depends, “ she responded. “ what’s the quote ? “
they navigated through the thought for a moment and a half. “ no. “ they stated very firmly, strummed to a G. “ i would be INCENTIVIZING you to not roofie me.” it was a flimsy retort, at best. banking on the motivations of the other person. but they were drunk and willing to take that chance. “ so that i keep buying you drinks and you get to hang out next to the stage like, hey, i’m with the band. ”
scarlett snorted at the drunken ramblings of warped rationale, shown true by a CUTE, non-binary bar player. old scarlett might have asked them if they partied. this one would just get them a fucking drink. “ i’m gonna get drinks as soon as you tell me what you want, but i feel pretty obligated to let you know that i don’t think you should rely on that reasoning. “ and then, as if she didn’t already know, she called over the noise, “ what chord was that ? “
the last time maria had felt the sun on her face – her sun. the one back home. – she was outside the aquarium in atlanta. p a r k e r had had his arms around her, squeezing the feeling from her elbows. she remembered the perfectly trim grass. “ not if you don’t try. ” she slid the papers closer to the middle that stood between them, pointed to a spot smudged with ink. “ that part says we’ve missed movie night for the second week in a row. ” the last time maria had kissed another person, she’d been standing on the most perfect grass she had ever seen. she pointed again. “ and that part says it’s your turn to buy the pizza. ” her lips slipped over their now shared straw, as if it would be enough.
he wouldn’t dream of telling her that he had missed the last two movie nights on purpose. it wasn’t her fault, but he couldn’t tell her more than he could. there were things she didn’t know that were sure to DETER her interest. his brow straightened, then furrowed and he leaned in as close as he could to the table. “ hm... “ he hummed as he studied the numbers and words. were it filled with what she said it was, he’d be able to read it. “ no, i don’t see it. “ he smirked down at the paper and blindly reached for her drink, wrapping around the cup and consequently, her hand. his head perked up and though he lingered, sure that she saw his eyes first, he retracted his hand. “ sure you’re not too busy with paperwork ? “ any excuse to not want to ruin his best friend’s life.
