Quote the raven

Nevermore

[goodbyewhateverforever]

investments, work, n.a and family.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

everything changes for the better. now i understand why I went through even the most saddest things and all the things I did it was to have gypsie and have my love for myself today. no more drugs no drinking eating healthy not drinking soda saving money working two jobs . family loves me.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

time to move on..15 months clean

[goodbyewhateverforever]

These two pictures hit me on the same week and I was weak like it was only yesterday.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

Im living this life pretending now that the one I truly feel love for is not the one. I'm going to focus my energy on my baby for the rest of my life I wish I could have you Sam. I really didn't know life could change this much because of all the dumb choices I've made. Im sorry to say i learned how losing love can harm a soul by losing you. Now I have gypsie maybe she can learn through my mistakes. Maybe someone will make me feel like I'm home and safe in that person's arms. That for me was you. It will never be anyone but you I won't be able to find anyone that lives up to you.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

I honestly get the wrong idea when it comes to you and my better judgment tells me to move on but my heart won't let go of hope. So just hearing from you hurts me I can't handle it. I'm being honest I'm currently obsessed with the idea that I can hear from you now at any moment you wish to speak to me. It's good because I feel good hearing from you. But it's bad because that's all I can think about. I've never felt so sick and ashamed and stuck on someone. You deserve the world and I need to take care of myself. I need to stop telling you what I think I want you to need me but I don't think that feeling will ever return to you. You already told me months ago you care about me and it's just different. I'm sorry I'm gonna ignore you until you try harder maybe that's never in that case we can't hurt eachother.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

I realize something if you didnt text me back within 2 or 3 hours I was being ignored.I dont think anyone can ignore the person they care about that much.On the other hand I care to much about you and not enough about my own family.I’m sick over you and its time I stop.If you want me you can have me that’s the truth if you wanted me you would have came to me by now.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

As long as I have a memory of you I'll never love another truly. I think my soul mate is you and you no longer feel the same and it's been like that for a long time. I know I need to let go but I don't know how.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

I love Samantha more then I love my self right now.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

[goodbyewhateverforever]

I love you so much for caring for me. For being beautiful and having that laugh and those thoughts about me. Keep me in your heart always you will forever be in mine. Some day speak to me in your own voice and hear mine and maybe your heart will collect with mine maybe.just know that I've grown past being a child into a man and that I will be a good friend or the love you can reclaim.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

You are the beez knees.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

I feel so stupid falling for your mans crazyness.I should have known you wouldnt run to me in any way your stronger then he thinks.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

Such odd behavior I dont know whats real sometimes.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

I live for her words and her moments we share are so rare but worth the wait.I miss her so much I crave her so deeply My love for he will never die.I couldnt be anymore in love with another person than with her.The girls I have right now are great but they aren't Samantha.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

You messaged me today and I was happy to know you still think of my face and my name and my existence isnt just something you wish never was.I love you still as much as the day we last saw eachothers face.I love you until the end of time.I would give my entire life away just to spend one more minute with you.I would be a strong man for you now I am so much better at life now then I ever was.I know all this is just a fantasy and its not right and I’m a bad person for saying this but I want you back and nothing will ever change that I guess.I cried when I saw your messenger icon on my phone today because I know you feel something for me still I Just wonder what that is..I feel good hearing from you nothing you will ever do will make me angry or feel negative ever again.I love you Samantha.

[goodbyewhateverforever]

Just thinking about making you smile and the ways I did that.