If David and Michael didn't have wives I would have assumed they'd fucked at some point during filming because their chemistry is seriously unreal
the amount of sexual tension is fucking insane, y'all have no idea what you're in for
SPOILER WARNING SPOILER GOOD OMEN SPOILERS BELOW!!!!!
Scene 1: The ep starts with a flashback to 2500 BC. Crowley is getting ready to destroy goats using fireballs when Aziraphale appears and tells him not to. Crowley tells him he has a permit, which is basically a really long scroll, and he explains to Aziraphale that heâs doing this because God has a bet with Satan on how Job will still remain true even if he were suffering. He has to destroy everything Job has. Aziraphale is disturbed by this. Crowley rains down fireballs on the goats.
Scene 2: Aziraphale is in heaven, examining a copy of the âpermitâ with Muriel. Longhair!Gabriel shows up and pretty much reaffirms what Crowley said. He tells Aziraphale not to worry because Jobâs going to get everything back anyway, and that heâll have 7 ânewâ children. Aziraphale is upset because that means the 3 original children will still die.
Scene 3: Crowley pretends to be a shoemaker as he talks to Job and his wife to ask where their children are.
Scene 4: Flash forward to the present. Aziraphale is trying to read but Gabriel keeps interrupting him (this is the already posted scene where Gabriel asks âwhat comes after K?â). When Aziraphale tells Gabriel to make a noise whenever he moves, Gabriel eventually starts dusting the bookshelves and singing âEverydayâ. Aziraphale asks where he learned that song but Gabriel doesnât know.
Scene 5: Crowley is sleeping in his car, parked in a sidestreet not in Soho, and is woken up by Shax knocking on his door. Shax teleports into the passenger seat of his car and tells him Gabriel is missing and that a huge energy signature (they have a specific term for it) was detected at Aziraphaleâs bookshop. Crowley feigns ignorance and jokes to Shax that it mightâve been him (Crowley) who did it.
Scene 6: Aziraphale visits Maggieâs record shop. He asks Maggie if sheâs familiar with the song Every day (he sings a bit of it). Sheâs crying again, this time because she worked up the nerve to give Nina a record only to find out that Nina has a girlfriend. She then explains to Aziraphale what the song is and gives him a record â apparently sheâs been getting a lot of copies of the Every day record from The Resurrectionist in Edinburgh because every record there transforms into Every day. Aziraphale asks her if she senses something big and she says no. Panicked, Aziraphale runs back to the bookshop just in time for Michael, Uriel and Seroquel to arrive. Gabriel greets them (as Jim) and they notice himâŠ. But they donât recognize him as Gabriel. Aziraphale realizes the miracle worked.
The angels interrogate Aziraphale and asked why there was a huge blast of energy from his bookshop. Aziraphale is flustered and (looking at the record Maggie gave him) lies on the spot, saying itâs because he was trying to get Maggie and Nina to fall in love. They ask âwell, did they?â Aziraphale says he doesnât know yet. The angels say theyâll send down someone to verify that it worked and then leave. Throughout this scene, Gabriel is getting their attention and at some point Michael notes that he seems familiar. The angels leave.
Scene 7: Aziraphale and Crowley meet at the pub. Crowley is surprised Aziraphale asked him to meet there and Aziraphale explains that they canât meet at the coffee shop now either. While Crowley is getting their drinks, a man (Mr. Brown) from the shopkeeperâs association ambushes Aziraphale and tells him he has to host their annual party (the ball, basically) in a few days. Mr. Brown leaves and Aziraphale is all âthis is why I donât like going to pubsâ lol. He and Crowley exchange updates about the Gabriel issue. Aziraphale tells Crowley they now need to get Nina and Maggie to get together because heavenâs gonna send someone to check if itâs true. Crowley says they should get them to huddle âunder an awningâ in the rain and Aziraphaleâs all mm nah that wonât work. Aziraphale asks if Crowley knows Jane Austen and Crowley said she used to do all sorts of crimes etc and Aziraphale is weirded out and is all âNo?? She writes books!â which Crowley is surprised to hear about. Aziraphale explains that Jane Austen always included balls in her books and that they should do that.
Aziraphale tells Crowley about Gabriel singing every day, and he keeps calling it âa clue!!â to which Crowley always looks irritated lmao. They walk to the bookshop and Crowley interrogates Gabriel, asking him what the earliest thing he can remember is.
Suddenly Gabriel gets purple eyes for a few seconds and starts reciting a quote (something about humans). He goes back to âJimâ mode right after and says his headâs not big enough for these things, and slinks away.
Crowley and Aziraphale exchange glances because they remember him saying the same thing back in Jobâs eraâŠ.
Scene 8: Flashback to Crowley entering the house where Jobâs kids are. Aziraphale blocks him off, trying to convince him not to kill them. He tells Crowley âyou donât want to kill kids!â and Crowley is all âI do want to kill these kids just like how I killed those goatsâ. Aziraphale says he knew Crowley as an angel and Crowley says âIâm not that angel anymore.â Aziraphale gives up and Crowley prepares to cross the room. All of a sudden the crows around them start bleating. Aziraphale smiles and miracles them back into goats. Crowley gets embarrassed.
They go meet the kids. The eldest is played by David Tennantâs son LOL who flirts with Aziraphale by saying he thought thereâd be a different angel while he strokes the front of Aziraphaleâs robe??? Thatâs when Crowley says âHe seems niceâ LMAO. After Aziraphale fails to explain to the kids properly whatâs going on, Crowley starts lighting things on fire. The kids get scared as the house starts to burn. Thereâs a storm raging outside and Crowley teleports everyone to the basement.
Aziraphale calls out Crowleyâs bluff again, saying Crowley meant to hide the kids and not kill them. Crowley turns the kids into lizards and hides them in a little pot. Â
Scene 9: The storm is still raging outside and Crowley and Aziraphale are in the basement. Aziraphale questions Crowley about the goats and asks whose side heâs on and Crowley says âmy sideâ. Aziraphale says âthat sounds terribly lonelyâ but Crowley insists it isnât. Crowley starts drinking wine and Aziraphale looks disgusted, asking why Crowley is drinking human wine. Crowley offers him some and he refuses, looking grossed out. Crowley then picks up some pork ribs and asks Aziraphale if he wants to try those instead since he wonât get drunk off them. Aziraphale is hesitant, and accuses Crowley of trying to tempt him, but tries the pork rib and immediately gets addicted to them, eating non-stop.
Scene 10: When the storm clears Aziraphale and Crowley find Job kneeling under a light, with God speaking to him. Job is asking questions but God just keeps saying nonsense like âdo you know who gave the peacocks their feathers, Job?â
Scene 11: Job returns to his house and his wife asks what God said. Job says he didnât really understand much but that God was talking about whales a lot and stuff lol. His wife asks what happened to their children and thatâs when Gabriel and the angels appear. Gabriel looks incredibly proud of himself when he tells Job that because Job never lost his faith in God, he will now get everything back, but twice as much. Aziraphale arrives late and joins the angels. Job asks about his children and Gabriel says heâs going to give Job 7 new ones. Job collapses on his knees saying he wants his original children and his wife is about to curse God when Crowley interrupts and re-introduces himself as the shoemaker from before. Gabriel asks Aziraphale who Crowley is and Aziraphale says heâs a shoemaker lmao. Crowley says he also happens to be an obstetrician and that he can help Jobâs wife have her new 7 kids.
Job and his wife are confused, the angels are just as confused, and Michael asks how Jobâs wife is supposed to have 7 kids. Crowley mentions that Gabriel would know how humans reproduce seeing as he was there in the Garden of Eden when Eve was created. Gabriel smugly agrees, so Crowley says kind of like how Eve was made, all he has to do is take 3 of Jobâs ribs.
Job and his wife are still confused as hell but Crowley whispers to them to play along. Jobâs wife âpullsâ 3 ribs out of Jobâs stomach, and using a miracle Crowley snaps his fingers and the 3 children reappear (heâd put the pot with the lizards on the ground behind Job and his wife lol). Michael asks why the children are fully grown and Gabriel points out that Eve was fully grown too.
But the angels are suspicious because Job calls his son by his âoriginal sonâsâ name (despite his wife hushing him) and Gabriel asks Aziraphale if the children are the original ones or the new ones. Aziraphale lies, saying the children are Jobâs new ones. Gabriel is satisfied with this.
Scene 12: We flashforward to the present. Aziraphale notices that Crowley is gone and Gabriel tells him Crowley left while he was thinking.
Scene 13: Crowley is walking by the coffee shop and sees Nina. He asks if Nina is interested in Maggie but Nina says âno, I barely know herâ. Crowley asks if she would find it romantic if she were huddled under an âawningâ with someone in the rain LMAO. Nina is weirded out by his question and he walks away, heading for the Bentley. Aziraphale is there and Crowley asks what heâs doing. Thatâs when Aziraphale says that heâs going to go to Scotland to investigate The Resurrectionist. Crowley says âwhat⊠youâre taking the train?â and Aziraphale says heâs taking âour carâ. Crowley gets pissed saying âItâs MY carâ and Aziraphale says technically itâs HIS bookshop but it services them both, therefore Crowleyâs car is also his car. Besides, Aziraphale got his license 90 years ago even though he didnât have to! Crowley is to stay at the bookshop to watch over Gabriel. Crowley groans.
Scene 14: Flashback to Job era, with Aziraphale sitting on a rock overlooking the sea. Heâs crying and Crowley approaches. Aziraphale says he figured Crowley would be the one to do it and asks if heâs going to take him to hell. Crowley laughs at this and says no, because Aziraphale wouldnât like it there. Aziraphale is surprised because he lied to God and is now a âfallen angelâ. He doesnât know what he is anymore after what he did. Crowley comforts him and says âyouâre an angel who sides with Heaven as far as he can goâ, and Aziraphale says it feels very lonely. He tells Crowley âbut you said you werenât lonelyâ. Crowley says âI lied.â
i've had an ep 2 summary typed up for a while but I figure I'd release it later when more have gone to the premiere, this'll be for those poor souls without GO showing in a theater nearby :)
dunno how you get âitâll end on a cliffhangerâ from âitâs not gonna end up with everything neatly tied up in a bowâ but ok, weâll see whoâs laughing in a few days hahahahahahaha