baseball?? that game from twilight?
tennis?? that game from death note?
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@gothbeyond
baseball?? that game from twilight?
tennis?? that game from death note?
my personal favorite yotsuba lawlight flavor is when people exploit the hell out of the âyou forget memories but not feelingsâ deal and make it such that pre-yotsuba light already had a crush and so yotsuba light has to deal with being inexplicably fond of this guy who has been nothing but unjustifiably terrible to him ?????? what is happening to him. is this illness
rewatching death note rn
Dusk of Silence and Sovereign of Darkness.
I wonder who they are fighting⊠:0 anyways i thought this would have been an intresting concept if somehow Dark Choco and Dark Cacao reunited but just very differently. Them both being corrupted.
(Art block and school are eating my time to draw anything sorry đ„Č)
sometimes you do have to remember what does he do late at night when the world is sleeping does he see pixels not dreams
i love how "the way it ends" sound almost like a break-up song
because it is, in a way. L and light are the only people who have ever truly challenged each other, and because of that, it'll be a bittersweet victory to whoever wins
"though it feels right, a part of me knows that it's wrong" i know this line is referring to L's actions being controlled, but tell me this doesn't also go so hard as an analogy for he and light's relationship
"life will continue just the way i've always planned" and it really feels more like light is trying to convince himself of that. that killing L won't affect him at all
"i've always stayed a step ahead but you were with me all the way" INSANE thing to say about your enemy. please kiss already and stop it with the divorce arc
"i've seen through you from the start" "i've simply let you play your part" "you'll never, ever get away" "don't you see that you will die today?" this is like listening to your parents fight... the audience is lawlight's children of divorce
"the message that it sends now sounds exactly like a closing door" everything about this is just so break-up coded i can't even
"feel how a minute spends now, when you wish you had a minute more" "like a closing door" "a minute more" LIGHT SOUNDS SO YEARNFUL?? like he doesn't want this to end, their game is coming to a close and it's just so bittersweet. he wants that cookie SO BAD.
and their voices are so insanely good!? light is trying to dominate the song and L's voice just keeps coming back at him and fighting it. and all the emotions in the lines?? oh god i'm gonna be ill
even the title being "the way it ends" feels like it's referring so much more to the end of their relationship, not just the end of L's life
art collab with my friend!!! x: @junsui4089
THANK YOU FOR AN AMAZING ART COLLAB KA!! đ„șđ„șâ€ïžâđ©čđ«¶đ
đđ
traitor
if you're there, reading this, ive died. wanna know why? Noelle. you guessed it. NOELLE DID THIS. SHE HATES ME AND MY TUMBLR.
alderic? more like SMELLYRIC.
You made Noelle leave the VC.
HELLO
hello everypony, today i am attempting to read HOMESTUCK. i am very sad i didnt read it sooner because now i will unfortunately be labeled as NEWGEN. sigh! so far, i HATE it. stay tuned! heart emoji
NEW GEN NEW GEN NEW GEN NEW GEN NEW GEN
rumor.
hey tumblr fam. i recently heard from a friend of a friend that a certain person named ASH likes to roleplay ww2. thanks for listening in. tell ur family!
I am not dignifying schoolyard taunts with a response. /ref
Hello. When is your fanfic dropping.
hello, fuc off middle finger emoji
oh okay đ
i just sang the entire alphabet to try and figure out what came after Z just to realize its the last letter,,, -@gothbeyond
FOUL
I really hate red velvet's hair I can never draw it the same đ©
I do enjoy indulging in shadowfaerie from time to time
đ
Every time I try to fly, I fall
PAIRINGS:Â Rex x Marshall, paired with some Blackbird for my old man yaoi freaks.Â
WORDS: Â 7.4k
GENRE:Â Hurt/Comfort
WARNINGS:Â Lots of pain and hurt, aggressive arguments, self-harm
SUMMARY:Â None, good luck!
The wind whistles through the grass, lifting the leaves through the air. They danced along the wind. Beautiful as can be. There in Oudega, Sawyer had gotten a plot of land and built a quaint, vintage house for Stratford. They lived there with some of the kids, the kids they claimed as their own: Alderic, Liam, Selene, Ryung, and Rex.
Rex. She grumbled, staring out the window of the top floor. She stared at the beauty of the land. She couldnât help but feel restless and disgusted with herself. Could she even claim her name again? She was no longer the strong person she once was. She no longer lived up to her name. Thatâs what she believed.Â
She perched herself on the nook attached to her window. Leaned up against the window frame as she placed another cigarette between her lips. She had already gone through half the carton. Chain smoking out her window as she sat in the silence.Â
Rex had recently been broken up with. It was the first time she had been broken up with, usually itâs her that initiates it so she feels nothing. This time, she grieved what she loved.
Her hands shook as she stared out at the sunset. Rex felt utterly numb in this grievance. She hadn't left her room, hadnât eaten in days, barely drank any water. She just smoked her cigarettes and stared out her window.Â
She attempted to doll herself up, to make her feel pretty. But as she stared into the mirror, she couldnât help but feel disgusted in herself. Every thought of herself brought her back to him. That night it went down.Â
Rex looked over to Marshall, who was now stumbling around the room. High off all the pills he took. She had asked him to grab her other lighter from the table, but he could barely stand.Â
She shot up and went over to him, helping him to his feet. As she stared at his face, his eyes were blown open and his mouth was agape. He looked like he couldnât control himself.Â
âWoah⊠Baby, maybe we should get you to lay down and eat something?â She asked.
âFuck no, Iâm fucking fine, Rex.â His eyes shot up to meet her gaze. Typically, his attitude never bothered her. She could deal with the drug abuse and the temper, but for some reason, this time it hurt a little bit.
âDonât yell at me,â She furrowed her brows, âIâm only trying to help you, you could at least be a bit fucking nicer about it.â
âGet the fuck off me, I donât need your fucking helpââ He ripped himself from her grip and grabbed the lighter.Â
âYes, you do. Youâre about to fall over just standing!âÂ
âMaybe I want to fucking fall!â He yelled at her, towering over her small frame. âYouâre not my fucking caretaker, Rex, I donât need your fucking help!â
For a moment, Rex was silent. She didnât know what to say. Sheâs always been a caring person, albeit her tone and language may have sucked a bit, but she always cared. Marshall never seemed to mind till now, or at least she thought so.Â
âYou always want to help people, take care of your fucking self before you go and âhelpâ other people. Youâre not helping! Nobody helps, you donât know what youâre fucking doing or talking about. Itâs all BULLSHIT!â He screamed at her. Rexâs breath started to shake as she backed up against the wall.Â
There they stood in the abandoned house that Rex had found to smoke in. She was trembling, and didnât understand why. She was always able to stand up to him no matter what. Why was she so scared this time?
âI⊠I donât like this side of you,â She shook, âYouâre scaring meâŠâ
âYeah? Well maybe you should be fucking scared. Youâre dating a fucking monster.â He growled. He didnât even look like himself. âWhat? What, Rex? Scared because youâre seeing the truth? Youâre seeing the true side of me and what? Youâre fucking scared?â He snapped at her.Â
âYes! Iâm scared, Marshall. Youâre fucking tweaking!â She cried out.Â
âMaybe Iâm not tweaking, maybe youâve just got a stick up your ass!â
âMarshall! Youâre fucking shaking, youâre scaring the shit out of me! Just calm down, I know who you areââ
âNO THE FUCK YOU DONâT!â He screamed and slammed his hand into the wall, making her flinch. He stared at her, feeling his vision spin in guilt. He stared at her, terrified of him. âMaybe⊠Maybe Iâm not good enough for you.â He whimpered.
âNo, no, baby please donât say thatââ She went to reach for him, and he ripped away.Â
âGo home. Itâs over, Iâm⊠Iâm not good for you. Iâm a monster, youâre sitting there shaking terrified of me. Just go home, Rex.â He said and grabbed his shit before walking out the door.Â
Rex trembled in place for what felt like forever. As soon as she came back to reality, she grabbed her bag and started to call out for him. âMarshall? Marshall!â She yelled. She ran through the whole abandoned house, tripping on rubbish left in the house.Â
She ran outside. Everything was gone. The car, her dignity, Marshall. Everything. She stood in the silent, still air of the darkness. Rex stared into the distance. Nothing. She was left alone⊠again. Just like every other fucking time.Â
She couldnât help but drop to her knees and scream. Again and again. Again and a-fucking-gain. Every fucking time she gets close to happiness, it gets ripped from her.Â
When she came to, she hissed slightly. Realizing that she accidentally rested her burning cigarette against her leg. She pulled it away immediately, staring down at the small, circular burn mark on her thing. That was the first time she felt something since Marshall left.Â
She couldnât help but stare down at her skin. It wasnât the first time sheâs put a cigarette out on her leg, which was shown with all the tiny burn marks strewn across her soft skin, mixed with the healing cuts atop her thighs.Â
Without thinking, she took another cigarette and put it out against her thigh again. Hissing at the burning pain, and sighing when she pulled it away. It didnât feel good, but she felt something.Â
She stared down at her lighter, placing the lit cigarette back into her lips. Steadily puffing and blowing the smoke as it floated through her mouth and lungs.Â
She grabbed the lighter without hesitation and lit it up, letting the metal heat up. Barely flitting her fingers over the orange flame, but quick enough for her fingers not to be burned, just to feel the heat.Â
She paid no mind to the world around her, not even the creaking of her bedroom door opening. Not even when Liam spoke out to her, âSmoking kills, yâknow?â She just stared at the flame, before it finally went out, sticking the metal part into the skin of her wrist, letting out a shaky breath followed by a short wince.Â
She was ripped from her thoughts and actions when someone grabbed her lighter and wrist. âWhat⊠What are you doing?â Liam stared down at her in shock. She looked up at him, her once soft brown eyes now black, soulless.Â
âAre you insane?â He whined, taking the lighter and shoving it in his pocket.Â
âNo! Please, Liamââ She cried standing up, but barely meeting his height. âPlease, justâ Just give it back, thatâs all Iâm asking. Iâm begging you, just give it backââ She choked out.Â
He just stared at her. Fear, shock, guilt. It all riddled his bones. Nothing bad has happened to any of them since they started living here in the Netherlands. And surely nothing like this. Liam didnât know what to do. His mouth fell open, but the words were lost.Â
âIâm sorry, I canât.â He said before leaving the room. Rex couldnât even chase him. She didn't have the energy to leave. She couldnât leave looking the way she did. Feeling the way she did.Â
She just curled up in the middle of the room. Pulling her knees into her chest and covering her ears with her hands. She started to panic. Her breath clutching her chest and squeezing on her heart. That was Marshallâs lighter. The only thing she had left of him. The only thing she had left.
About a day later, Liam was outside pulling weeds. He couldnât get his mind off of the whole ordeal. He didnât want to say anything and risk breaking the trust heâs built with Rex, but it was eating him alive.Â
His hand shook as he pulled up the weeds. Liam continued to fasten his pace. He didnât really know.. what to do. So, he did the only thing he believed he was good at.
Sawyer watched him from the kitchen window, staring intently as he washed dishes. He couldnât help but observe as Liam anxiously frolicked around the yard. Gathering weeds and even just random blades of grass.Â
âSawyer, sweetheart,â Stratford said in his sickly sweet tone, making Sawyer turn his head to watch as the other melted into a hug from behind, âYouâre going to melt a hole in the glass.â
âIâm sorry, dear. Liamâs attitude has me worried⊠and Rex hasnât left her room at all,â He started to shake his head, sighing as he pinched the bridge of his nose. âI have a bad feeling.â
âHave you talked to either of them at all?â
âLiam gets skittish, and Rex has given me⊠the silent treatment.â
Stratford chuckled at him a little bit and pushed on his shoulder, to which Sawyer responded by turning around to face him. He gently tugged on the hooks of his pants, pulling Stratford flush up against him. Stratford gently guided Sawyerâs chin down to give him a quick kiss.Â
When he pulled away, the brown eyed man softened his gaze. He stared directly into the pools of worry that Sawyer considered his eyes to be.Â
âEverything is going to be okay, Iâll go talk to Liam. Will you try speaking to Rex again?â
âShe doesnât want to talk yet,â He sighed.
Before Stratford could respond again, he heard the patter of soft feet against the floor. He slightly stepped away from Sawyer and turned to look at the blonde who was making her way through the kitchen.Â
âSpeak of the devil, and she shall appear,â he paced over to lean against the counter. âYou alright, kiddo?â His playful demeanor filled with worry as his eyes laid on Rex.
Rex was dressed up in long sleeves and her long, flowing skirt that swayed as she walked. She barely looked up to meet his gaze, muttering a weak response as she trudged her way to the front door.Â
âWhere are you going?â
âTo sit on the porch,â She mumbled before shutting the door behind her. Stratford looked back over to Sawyer, who gave him an I told you so look.Â
They sat in a minute of silence staring at each other like this. Sharing unspoken looks of worry. Even though neither of them said a word, they understood the silent conversation held between each other.Â
âIâll go speak with Liam, you handle her.â Stratford lifted himself off the counter, leaning over to kiss his husband's cheek before he walked outside. Leaving Sawyer to groan, unsure of what to even say. Where to start.
Stratford sighed and stepped out onto the porch, he went to greet Rex. However, she had turned the corner on the porch. Going to sit on the adjacent side of the house. He sighed before letting his eyes wander, landing on Liam like a pin point.Â
He watched as Liam wiped the sweat from his brow, still pulling out what he could only assume was weeds.Â
He moseyed his way over to the sweet southern child and crossed his arms. âSo, how many weeds have you collected so far, kid?âÂ
Liam jumped a little bit, before laughing a little bit. âSorry, dad. I didnât see you there⊠Iâve pulled up a hefty amount so far.â
âYeah, I can tellâ He laughed along with him. Noticing that he never met his gaze, just a few glances to the eyes, before he went back to weeding. âJust be careful not to pull up Sawyerâs flowers, we may not live to see the next day.â He gently hit the kids arm in a joking manner.Â
âYeah⊠Iâll be carefulâ He gave an awkward smile.Â
Thatâs when Stratford started to feel a little awkward. Now sensing the worry that Sawyer was talking about. The usually awkward, but happy go lucky kid was suddenly acting just slightly off.Â
âLiam,â He spoke up, making the southern boy look up at him. His brown eyes were soft, worried. He looked like he had a million thoughts running through his head. âWalk with me,â Stratford said and lightly patter his shoulders before turning to the garden.Â
Before Liam could protest, he just sighed and tossed the weeds he held down into a pile. Wiping the sweat from his forehead, he slowly followed after his now father.Â
As they walked through the short garden, it was nothing but silence. Silence neither of them could take. The tension in the air grew, but it would soon be broken by Stratford looking towards the boy and asking a simple question.Â
âWhatâs on your mind?â
Liam didnât know what to say. He couldnât break the trust between him and his sister, especially because their relation with each other was finally turning out okay. When they were roommates at Wolfsbane, it was a little harder. Rex was stubborn, Liam was too nice to her. Neither of them really knew how to interact with the other, despite all the things they had in common. Now? They were siblings. They could actually talk, connect, and care for the other. But.. after the other day, it changed.Â
âListen, itâs really not any of my business.â He chewed on his lip, occasionally looking over at his father who had an eyebrow raised, confused as to what he meant by that. âIâm justâŠâ He couldnât help but break, he hated lying, and he was no good at it anyway âIâm worried about Rex. Sheâs acting reckless. I donât⊠think sheâs feeling well,â he finally looked up to meet Stratfordâs eyes.Â
Liam sighed and crossed his arms, holding himself tight. âAnd I canât⊠I canât stop thinking about how I could have stopped her, or I could have even helped her. It feels so.. Out of my control and in my controlâI just want her to be safe.âÂ
Stratford sighed and wrapped one arm around the boy's shoulders, stopping in his tracks to pull him closer to his side. âYou canât do everything yourself, you know that?â He gave his son an empathetic smile. âSometimes, people have to figure things out for themselves. If thatâs⊠dangerous, thatâs when you tell us.âÂ
Liam blinked a few times and sighed, before fully throwing himself into his dadâs arms. His breathing was heavy, a few tears were shed, but it wasnât a breakdown. Just a release of emotions.Â
After a while of the hug, Liam pulled away and uttered a short âthank you,â before he pulled something out of his pocket. Stratfordâs eyebrows furrowed as he stared down at the lighter. Before he could ask why he had it, Liam spoke up.
âI took it from Rex. I just⊠I canât hold onto it, but I canât give it back.âÂ
Stratford just nodded and took the lighter, starting to worry a little more about the little blonde who was now being interrogated by Sawyer. Now he wishes it were him talking to Rex insteadâŠ
Rex had found herself curled up on the swing that was located on the side of the house. Her knees pulled up to her chest as she looked out to the land. It was the same landscape she had found herself staring at for the past week. Nothing had changed, just her view.Â
Now she saw it in all its beauty. The long grass blowing while the wind whistled, the sun had been perched in the sky at high noon, she could hear the bugs singing their melodical tone. How she wished to be as free as those insects.Â
Thatâs when she felt the shifting of the swing, she didnât have to look over to know who it was. She didnât speak, she just laid her head in her lap and waited for the lecture to start. To her surprise, there was no lecture. Just a hand that rested gently on her back, which she shrugged off.
She couldnât stand the feeling of being touched, it made her shrivel in the seat further. Sawyer recognized this and let his hands fall into his lap with a sigh.Â
âItâs nice to see you out of your room,â He spoke up, trying to get her to even look his way.Â
She still didnât speak, she had no words to say. Her mind had moved on from the night Marshall dumped her, now she was playing every moment leading up to it. What did she do wrong?
âWhere have you gone?â Sawyer asked, which finally got Rex to look up at him puzzled. He nodded his head to the side. âWhere is your head at, I mean. Whatâs happened that has you so quiet?â
Her words were caught in her throat. She wanted to tell him everything. Yet she wanted to tell him nothing at all.Â
âYouâve never been this quiet. Not even when I first met you, and you and Ryung were⊠whispering and laughing in my classroom, you know that?â He smiled at her, she just squeezed onto her skirt and held herself tighter. Any closer to her own body, and her bones may start to fuse.Â
âMe and Marshall broke upâŠâ She whispered, which made Sawyerâs gaze soften. He immediately felt horrible. Although he never liked the guy, heâs always had problems with the kid but⊠to his knowledge he treated Rex right, and made her happy. Thatâs all he wanted for her.Â
âWhat? You guys have been going so strong?â
âI know! I donât.. I fucked up. I did something wrong. I fucked upâI just wanted to help him, I didnât mean to make him hate me!â She groaned and gripped her hair with her hands, burying her face into her knees.Â
âHey, hey. Donât say that. Marshall isâŠâ He decided to hold his tongue, since Rex loved him, âHe is who he is. Youâre so much better than that. You donât deserve to be heartbroken. You donât deserve to hold all this pain yourself, or feel guilty. You didnât do anything wrong, you were just in love,â He sighed and went to open his mouth and say something else until he noticed her hands.Â
Upon closer inspection, he noticed the small red marks were burn marks into her hand. His eyebrows furrowed, starting to freak out. He reached out her hand and she snatched it away. âRex, what is that? Did he do that to you?â He leaned in closer to try and get answers.Â
âNo! Itâs nothingâI just,â she stood up speechless, searching for the words to say. As her mouth fell open, she could feel the lump welling up in her throat again.
âCan I.. Can I see your hand?â He reached out for her and she backed away from him, freaking out. She didnât know what to do, so she just walked off.Â
âNo, itâs fine. Everythingâs fine. Good talk dad, goodnight!â She yelled as she walked away swiftly.
âNight? Rex! Itâs not even sunsetââ
âGoodnight!â She yelled and turned the corner. Frantically trying to get in the house, she almost ran into Stratford and Liam. In a panic, her mouth dropped open but she just turned and swung the door to the house open. Running inside to get away from everyone else. She passed Ryu, whose face lit up seeing her. Instead of speaking, Rex ran to her room.Â
Stratford and Liam were left outside, seeing Sawyer come poking around the corner of the porch with a sigh. They stared at him and he shook his head.Â
Now the three of them sat there, unsure of what to do. All of them worried about the state of Rexâs mentality.Â
Later that night, Rex was pacing her room anxiously. Cigarettes hung from her lips as she moved from her closet to the bed, and to her drawers. Hurriedly and impulsively, she was packing two bags. One duffle bag full of clothes, and a backpack with her life essentials.Â
In her own slightly manic mind, she had made a short circuited plan. All the money she had saved up working to get her own place not too far from here, she was going to talk that and leave.Â
She decided she would take her passport and cash and leave, she was going home: Germany. Maybe her aunt wouldnât mind her staying for a while. She was still in contact with a few of her cousins⊠maybe they could let her stay for a little.Â
As she finished throwing a week's worth of clothes in her bag, she hissed as she put the cigarette out on the back of her arm and tucked it behind her ear. Rex stopped thinking, the only thing on her mind was leaving.Â
She didnât want to burden any of them with her problems. Rex couldnât help but think that they would hurt Marshall, or even not care for her. Every survival instinct from her childhood and teenage years had kicked in. The only thing she knew how to do when things went wrong was leave. She was always moving around from house to house, family member to another, city to town, country to country. Rex never had a stable moment of peace, not till now at least.Â
And now she couldnât help but believe she was fucking everything up. She didnât believe she deserved any of this. She wasnât good enough for a family who cared.Â
She picked up her backpack and threw it over one shoulder, before she grabbed her duffle bag and car keys. She slowly walked out her room door, attempting not to make any noise. She hurried down the stairs gently, and straight to the front door. Gently turning the knobs so as not to make them creak. It was the middle of the night, and she was sneaking away. It wasnât her first rodeo.Â
She lightly closed the door behind her and quickly made it down the stairs, unlocking her car and throwing all her shit into the back seat. As Rex went to grab the handle, she hesitated. Was she really about to leave her family?
That one moment of hesitation led to a whole unraveling of events. Rex was so caught up in her own problems and doubts, she didnât even hear the person who had followed her outside.Â
âYouâre just gonna leave?â Her heart shattered into a million pieces. She didnât turn and look at them. She couldnât face them, not now. âYou just⊠werenât going to say goodbye?â
âRyung, pleaseâŠâ
âWhat happened to us against the world?â
âNo, please donât do this to meââ Her voice cracked.Â
âNo, Rex, you donât do this. You listen to me,â He stared as she turned around slowly to face him. âYou havenât spoken to me all week, nothing. You wouldnât open your door when I knocked, didnât eat the food I left for you, youâve ignored me. Do you know how much that hurts?â He gripped the edges of the porch. âIâve always been there for you, weâve always relied on each other. What the fuck happened so bad that you canât even tell me!â
âRyung, I canât do this tonight. I canât⊠I canât do it anymore. Iâm leaving, Iâm going back home to Germany,â She let him in just a bit. That was her best friend. Her ride or die. The only person she could ever fully trust.Â
She watched as he huffed, gripping the edge of the porch before he hurdled over it. Landing with a soft thud on the other side.Â
âThen Iâm coming with you.â
âNo, no youâre not. Youâre going to stay here with your⊠perfect little life, and the perfect little family that you fucking deserve.â
âWhat the fuck are you talking about, Rex?âÂ
Their voices started to get louder as they argued.
âYou deserve this. All of this. I couldnât even keep Marshall. I canât keep people happy, I donât deserve good things. I donât deserve any of this. I donât understand any of this.. I donât know good things, I never haveââ
âYouâre acting like everyone here has known fucking happiness, Rex. Stop sitting in your own head, youâre not the only person here whoâs been fucking hurt! Weâre figuring this out! Weâre finding things out, weâre doing this together!â
While the two stood in the yard and argued with each other, everyone was upstairs sleeping away. Besides Sawyer and Stratford, who were now stirring awake from their sleep. Sawyer started to move slightly, groaning as he pulled away from Stratford, who opposed immediately.Â
âSawyerâŠâ He turned over to look at the man who was now sitting up in bed, stretching awake.Â
âItâs okay dear, Iâll be right backâŠâ He whispered as he leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead. âI promise.â
Then he stood up from the bed and watched as Stratford curled into their blanket. He sighed, grabbing his robe and shrugging it on before stumbling out the door. He treaded down the stairs, listening to the conversationâno, argument. The argument was getting more intense by the second.Â
When he walked out to the porch, he looked out to his kids who had shot their heads over to the older man. Ryung was now red faced, sobbing as he was trying to convince Ryung to stay. Rex looked like she hadnât slept, she was frail, and shaking. She looked dazed, confused.Â
âRyung, go inside and let me talk to your sister.â His gaze shifted from Ryung over to Rex, before it went back to the black haired boy. They didnât protest, they just whimpered a bit and retracted from their best friend. Heading up the porch steps and into the house.Â
Sawyerâs gaze fell back onto Rex. They made direct eye contact for a while. She didnât know what to say, Sawyer was trying to find the patience.Â
âYou, come sit with me.â He commanded as he sat back onto the swing that they had shared earlier that day. Rex just sighed, ascending up the steps and to the swing. She sat on the other end of the swing. Silence filled the night.
The only thing that could be heard for miles was the sound of the cicadas and owls. Singing their nightly lullaby to the environment around them.Â
âWhere did you think you were going to go?â
âGermany⊠I was going to go home.â
Sawyer sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. He wasnât angry, he just⊠heâs never had to deal with this amount of heart break. Before Sawyer could say anything, the lump in Rexâs throat finally formed into words. Finally, she let her walls turn into a fence.Â
âI was going home because⊠Itâs the only place I understand. Sure, I was treated like shit, but at least thatâs what Iâm used to. Iâve always moved around. Iâve always faced hatred and being used, but I was so used to it.â She pulled her knees to her chest, realizing she was wearing shorts and a tanktop.. All the burn marks were now visible.
âIâm so used to pain and suffering. I donât⊠I donât feel like I deserve your care and kindness. It feels so⊠wrong.â She started to rub her eyes, groaning as she finally revealed the truth about herself.
âIâve never been loved. So to see a fraction of that from Ryung, and Marshall, and.. You and Stratford⊠I felt so out of place.â She looked up and out into the night, letting her arms drape over her knees. âAnd when I lost Marshall, I felt like I messed up. And then I felt like I ruined everything that I touch. I didnât want to ruin how nice everything is here. So, I tried to do the only thing Iâm good atâ She bit down on her lip and spoke, breathlessly âRan.â
âHe doesnât deserve you,â Sawyer responded âYou donât deserve to be in this much pain over some.. Boy.â He gazed at her, and she finally looked up to meet his gaze. He sighed. Sawyer had such a harsh soft spot for his girls. Both Rex and Selene.Â
Rex choked up, watching as Sawyer opened his arms to her. As much as she hated physical contact, she craved to be held. She craved comfort. All she wanted was for someone to see her. She immediately latched onto him, gripping him tightly.Â
âYou deserve good things, Rex. Please donât ever forget that. You deserve so much more than you were given growing up. Youâre not a horrible person, youâre not worthless, and you have done nothing wrong.â He squeezed her, rubbing her back as he felt her breathing become heavy and uncontrollable. âYou were just dealt a shitty hand, and you did the best you could with what you had.â
With those words, Rex could feel her eyes start to sting. All the knots she held in her chest gave out, snapping. She felt tears start to well up in her eyes. For the first time in years, she started to cry. There she sat sobbing into Sawyerâs chest. Scared if she lets go that heâll disappear.â
âAnd weâll always be here for you, Iâm not going anywhere. Youâre a part of this family, and we love every part of you. No matter what,â he gently kissed the top of her head as she sobbed, shaking in his arms.Â
Rex could finally let herself go. Finally, she felt safe. She felt like she was home. A home that loved and cared for her, no matter how hard things had gotten.Â
It had been a few weeks since everything happened. Rex had finally started to feel like herself again. Jean shorts, tanktops, her dangling jewelry. Sunny disposition plastered on her face as she walked out to the porch. Smiling as the sun blazed down on her.Â
She looked down to see Liam, who was tending to the garden. She looked over and grabbed a pair of gloves before hurrying to join him.Â
âNeed a hand? Or maybe two?â She smiled at him, shaking the gloves around.Â
He looked up at her and rolled his eyes, with a short laugh before he nodded to the garden. âUsually Iâd say no, but Iâll accept the help just this once.â
âOh, whatever. You know I would have done it even if you said no.âÂ
âYeah, yeah. Why do you think I agreed?â He huffed, pulling some green beans off of their plant, âJust start picking the damn tomatoes.âÂ
Rex pulled the gloves over her hands and started to pick the tomatoes, dropping them gently into the wicker basket that Liam brought out here.
There they spent time together under the blaze of the sun. Occasionally Rex would look up to look around the yard. There the whole family sat outside. She giggled as she watched Ryung and Stratford brain deep into a chess game up on the porch, while Alderic watched. On the opposite side of the porch sat Sawyer and Selene, trying to learn a new song on the guitar together.Â
She looked over to Liam who was focused on collecting vegetables. She hummed, sighing softly. âHey uhm⊠Iâm really sorry for what happened, I didnât mean for you to see all that.â
Liam looked up at her puzzled, and also sympathetic for her. He sighed and shook his head. âYou were going through a hard time. I shouldnât have reacted the way I did and⊠Iâm real sorry about that,â he smiled at her âYouâre my sister. I care a lot about you, okay?â
She returned the smile and bumped shoulders with him. âYouâre a real good kid⊠Thanks for caring so much. I donât know what would have happened if you didnât.âÂ
He just laughed and went back to picking vegetables with her. Soaking up the sun and enjoying some sibling bonding moments. There was nothing that could get better than this.
Thatâs when they heard the sound of an old car sputtering, driving slowly down the dirt path of their house. Rexâs head snapped over, confused as to who was pulling into the driveway. However⊠She seemed to recognize the dingy car. Watching as the Irish stepped out of the car, Rex immediately jumped up to her feet in excitement.
âClay, holy shit what are you doing here!â She yelled in excitement.Â
She was still pulling her shit together, huffing as she placed her glasses atop of her head, staring at Rex. Her shit eating cheshire grin fell upon her face as Rex almost bulldozed the taller gal over.Â
âWoah! I was just in the neighborhood, thought Iâd gâwan and stop by,â She looked over to see Ryung who had shot up from the tiny table he and Stratford were sitting at. As well as the dads who were confused as to why she was there as well.
Ryung apologized to Stratford, before running down the steps and bolting over to Clay, launching himself at her.Â
âHey! We still have a chess game to finishâOh whatever,â he laughed before staring down at the chess game he was somehow losing. He looked up to see Sawyer who had set down his guitar. He got up to help his husband walk out to meet them.Â
Clay gave her hugs all around, laughing at the two who were overly ecstatic to see her. âOkay! Okay! Calm down, itâs not like Iâm a celebrity,â she joked as if she didnât basically raise Ryu and Rex in the years that she knew them. âAnd Rex, I brought you a surprise⊠because I was basically begged to,â she said as she banged on the window of her beat up car.Â
Rexâs face twisted from excitement to fear as she watched Marshall step out of the passenger side of the car. He looked⊠torn up, sleepless and like he had been crying. She didnât look at anybody but him, not to her dads who were pissed, not to Liam who was ready to have a few words to say, not even to Ryung who was ready to snap the guy's neck.Â
They all sat in silence, but just as anybody could speak, Rex built the confidence to march over to him. She stood in front of him, staring him in the eyes.Â
She just took a shaky breath and spoke up, âYouâre an asshole. You know that?âÂ
âRexââ She heard Clay try to chime in.
âNo, shut up,â Clay immediately shut up. They all did. None of them knew what to do at this moment. They just watched like catty snobs in a soap opera.Â
âYou,â she pointed, poking him in the chest, âLeft me fucking broken. I thought I did something wrong, I thought I didnât deserve your love because you fucked with my head unintentionally.. You were hurt, and you took it out on me,â She felt the same lump form back in her throat. She started to feel like she couldnât breathe.Â
âAnd you left me thereâŠâ She pushed his chest, âYou just fucking left me there alone! Like I didnât mean anything to you!âÂ
Sawyer stepped forward to her, but Stratford grabbed his arm just shaking his head. He whispered to them to head back to the porch. They all moved away, keeping distance to let them have a moment. The only ones who stayed near: Ryung and Sawyer. They werenât about to put too much distance in case they needed to step in.
âI canât forgive you⊠I canât fucking forgive you for the shit you put me through!â She screamed and looked up at him. He was hurt. She just waited. Waiting for anything. A tear, an apology, a reaction, anything.
âFuck! Marshall! Say something, anything! Donât just stand there and stare, say something!âÂ
âIâve missed you⊠Iâve missed you so much,â he said shakily. âYou didnât deserve that. Anything that I put you through that night. I donât want you to forgive me, You deserve to feel like this.. You deserve to be upset with me.â He hesitated, but still reached out for her.Â
Without hesitating, Rex leaned in to hold him. Gently placing one hand on his shoulder, and the other rested gently on his cheek. She was mad, sure, furious even. She was hurt⊠but she couldnât say she didnât miss him. And she could never say that he was the only one in the wrong.Â
âIâm mad. I canât forgive you, not yet at least⊠but that doesnât mean I didnât miss you.âÂ
He stared down at her, not sure of what to say anymore. He couldnât apologize again, he didnât want to cry⊠he just wanted her back. âI was so horrible to you.â
âNo, you were high. You didnât put your hands on me, you were just expressing your fears. And I took it too hard to heart.â She gently rubbed her thumb over his cheek and sighed. âWe were scared, and⊠highâ she laughed a little bit. âWe made irrational decisions.â
âI fucking scared you, RexâŠâ
âYou were just as scared, you were scared for help.â She gave him a small smile.Â
âIâve missed you, even if you wonât take me back⊠I couldnât leave on that bad note. I couldn't leave with you fearing that again.â
âWho said I wouldnât take you back?â She furrowed her brows and laughed, pulling away from his touch and turning around. âOh, now youâve really pissed me off, how dare you say a thing like that, misinterpreting me andâ AH!â She screamed and started to giggle as he picked her up from behind, swinging her around. She laughed and yelled for him to be careful and put her down.Â
When Marshall set her back down, she spun to face him. He placed his hands at her waist and smiled at her, she smiled right back at him. âYou know⊠Iâve missed your sarcastic attitude.â
âOh really now? Well, I donât know if she missed you tooâŠâ She leaned up and wrapped her arms around his shoulders. Then she leaned in and gave him a kiss, grinning like an idiot the whole time.Â
In the back you could hear Clay cheering from the porch steps, earning a slap to the chest by Ryung. She winced and stared at him, âOh come one Ryu, Iâve been dying for them to get back together. He came to my house just to cry about her to me!â She sighed and put her sunglasses back on. âI mean for fucks sake, me and Leo were just trying to have a calm week.âÂ
Ryungsâ eyebrows furrowed as he stared at the person next to him. Giving him the absolute dirtiest side eye. âYou canât be seriousâŠâ
âRyu, darling. Look at me in the face and tell me those two arenât fucking made for each other?â She raised her eyebrows in a really bitch kind of face. âI mean, your dad may be pissed about it. But those fools are in love, love is hard and itâs found in all forms.â She huffed, almost a laugh but it was too short. âI mean, me and Leo absolutely bullied the shit out of each other, and look at us now? We own a house together.âÂ
Ryung hummed, turning to look at how everyone else felt. Sawyer looked⊠conflicted. He wanted Rex to be happy, but also wanted her to be safe. At the same time, he knew deep down Marshall was just some hurt kid who was never shown the proper care. He deserved someone who was going to care for him⊠and luckily, Rex was really good at that.Â
He sighed and started to walk down to the driveway, Stratford went to stop him, but he was already in motion.Â
âAw, itâs fine pops, your husband will be just fine,â Clay said and started to mess with her curls.Â
âClay⊠Youâre not helping.â Stratford spoke bluntly, yet Clay was still unfazed by his words.Â
Sawyer made his way down to the two who were happy just to be back together. He moved to stand behind Rex, towering over the both of them. Rex immediately moved away from Marshall, but before she could speak he had one statement.Â
âNot that you need my approval, youâre both consenting adults,â he started âBut if you hurt her again, I will not hesitate. You will not live to see the stars of the night, or the morning of.âÂ
âSawyerââ
âIâm just saying! Treat her right, I canât handle all that shit again, my heart actually might stop this time,â he laughed a little bit and turned away, before looking back âAnd.. keep the door locked if you have him over.â
âSawyer!â Rex laughed and put her head in her hands, rubbing her eyes as Marshall rolled his with a smile.Â
Sawyer threw his hands up and moved back to the porch, gently wrapping an arm around his husband's waist. He looked down at Clay who was a little too comfortable on their porch steps. He raised an eyebrow to look down at the Irish indie sleaze, who looked up to meet his gaze.Â
âAm I going to have to deal with you coming over more often?â
âOh, please, old man. Youâve been dying for me to come lighten the place up.â
âIs that a threat or a promise?â Sawyer smiled and Stratford gently hit his arm, before looking down at Clayton.Â
Stratford gently placed a kiss on his husband's cheek, and moved over to Ryung who was coming to terms with this rekindled relationship. He gently squeezed the kid's shoulder and nodded his head, âCâmon kid. Let your sister enjoy this moment, we have a chess game to finish.â
Like a moth to a flame, Ryung jumped around to face him and smiled. He laughed softly and said âYou mean, I have a game to whoop you in?â
âHey, the game could turn around,â He lied to save his skin as they made their way to the table.Â
The other kids had already left to go inside. Sawyer stood staring out at the other two, now standing with Clay who was filing her nails. He sighed softly, unsure of how to feel about this. On one hand, he wanted to forbid Rex from ever seeing him.. But she was an adult, plus it was another chance. He would do the same for Stratford if it ever happened, even though it hadnât.Â
âThe more you stare, it wonât change.â Clayton spoke up, leaving Sawyer to stare over at him.
âYeah, I know. I just.. Care a lot, I guess.â He stared between Rex and Marshall, then panned over to Clay who was still sitting in the same spot. Now leaned back into the steps. She blew on her nails to rid the dust of filling. Sawyer hummed and smiled, âCare for a cup of coffee, Harkin?â
âOnly if you promise a cigarette to go with it,â She smiled up at him, to which he rolled his eyes and ruffled her hair. âHey! Watch the curls, I spend a lot of time on themâ She swatted his hand away.Â
âOh tough it out, kid. Come on, letâs leave those two be. Iâll show you my guitar collection.â Sawyer started to walk inside, and Clay just followed. Leaving everyone to do their own thing.Â
A chess game, unattended vegetables, the hot sun, and nothing but the sound of laughter and the wind. Rex and Marshall were leaned against the Irish manâs car, sharing their first cigarette back together again. She leaned against him and he just sighed, wrapping an arm around her small frame. He pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head.Â
Rex reached up her pinky, staring at him with her large, doe eyes. He took her pinky finger and intertwined it with his, gently kissing his thumb as she did. No words exchanged, yet their actions spoke louder than words. They didnât need words to know they had a promise, a pact. Never to give up faith in the other.



