idk if y’all will know the answer to this but im femme and my butch gf wants to know more ways to like show that she’s butch when we’re out in public besides her appearance. it makes me really happy and makes her feel more butch. sometimes when we’re leaving places she’ll put her hand on my back and kinda guide me out, stuff like that. do y’all know anything more like that that butches can do to be like loving/protective of their femmes in public w/o too much pda?
it sounds like you are wanting to know about butch chivalry on dates, or perhaps ofos (old fashioned old school) butch/femme etiquette! this is all about showing your femme as much respect and courtesy as you can and caring for her safety. none of these are required in order to be butch, and you should only do the things that make both of you happy, but here’s a few more ideas for your butch!
open doors of cars or buildings and let your femme enter first
when walking down a street, walk on the side of your femme that is closer to the street
position yourself between your femme and the gaze of nearby men. perhaps even stare down men if they don’t mind their own business
when walking side by side, bend your arm, palm facing down, and hold it out to your femme, and she can hook her arm under yours and rest her hand on your forearm
assist your femme walking up or down stairs, especially if she is wearing heels - a hand on her back and walking just behind her when going up stairs, and walking just in front of her and guide her with your hand or arm for support when going down stairs
pull out chairs for your femme, don’t sit down until she has sat
taking charge of ordering food/drinks or talking to waiters - don’t decide what she wants for her though!
paying for meals or gifts - this really depends on your financial situation so don’t feel bad if that’s not feasible or not something that you both enjoy. if it is something that you really like doing but you don’t have much more money than your femme, you could take turns paying for things, or you could pay and then let her pay you back for some of it later
if you’re feeling romantic but don’t want to kiss on the lips in public, lift her hand to your lips and give it a gentle kiss :)
and of course the classic - offer your coat or jacket to your femme if she seems to be getting chilly
and then there’s also a few things that a femme can do for her butch!
straighten your butch’s collar, tie, bowtie, jacket, etc
light touches on her arm or shoulder, or even her thigh when sitting together
leave a kiss mark on your butch’s cheek (perhaps best to wait til the end of the night for this)
compliment your butch’s looks or talents, make her feel good about being butch
let your butch do things for you that make her feel good, and thank her sweetly for them
titsay
turnnoffyourmind
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