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synopsis: best friends suddenly feeling like strangers hurts more than either of you expected. what was once effortless between you and kei is now filled with awkward silences, avoidance and words that cut deeper than intended. but beneath all the tension, neither of you truly know how to let go of each other.
you woke up, the sun being your natural alarm on the weekends- its not like you woke up late. you groan softly rubbing your eyes as you hear your mother in the kitchen making something. you can tell by the music shes playing and sing along too that shes happy- excited even. you sit up slowly, your legs sore from training the day before. the dull ache in your calves immediately reminds you of the upcoming race and you click your tongue softly in irritation. great. as if your brain wasn’t crowded enough already.
you look at the alarm clock on your side table near your bed and you read 9:30. you get up, open your windows and make up your bed, as you do that you start to think about the liabary sitution. how odd it was.
you get ready for the day just to relax at your own house- in your own room so you decided to wash and brush your teeth before slipping into a comforable sundress, the one that compliments your eyes- the one keis mother had gifted you. today you were just going with the flow- well derserved because school was draining you. the tasks, homework and even training being a factor to your exhustion. you walk out of your room letting out a soft exhale after getting ready and your mother hears your room door being opened. "good morning sweets- kei and aunty are coming today." your mother calls out from the kitchen whike you were at the top of the staircase. "this cant be happening." you whisper to yourself. "good morning mother..okay then." you say quickly before going back to your room.
you run your fingers through your hair feeling frustated- not at your mom but at this sitution. before you could pave up and down your room your phone screen lights up.
fubuki alive?
yuki or did the race training finally kill you
despite yourself, you let out a quiet laugh through your nose.
you unfortunately alive
almost immediately:
fubuki you sound miserable
you stare at the screen for a second before typing again.
you kei’s coming over later.
typing bubbles appear instantly.
then disappear.
then appear again.
yuki OH.
fubuki oh that’s actually horrible
you fall back against your pillows dramatically.
yeah. horrible sounded about right.
fubuki
its okay, we are here for you okay?..queen never cry
yuki
you is kind
you is important
you is smart
fubuki
okay the first one is a lie
yuki
LOL BYE
you
ugh guys im so stressed though. ill keep you posted. ily guys
yuki
i love you more
fubuki
i love you forever more
you heart their messages,and close your phone.
the tsukishimas coming over used to never mean much.
kei would walk into your house like he lived there himself, his mother greeting yours loudly from the kitchen while he headed straight for the fridge without asking. sometimes he’d steal your snacks and deny it even with evidence. sometimes he’d sit at the edge of your bed while complaining about practice while you studied beside him. sometimes the two of you would simply exist in the same room without needing to fill the silence. sometimes he'd annoy you just to hear you complain.
it had always felt easy.
until recently.
your mother calls you down from the kitchen to stand by the door when they come because she’s busy at the stove and doesn’t want to leave it unattended. now you stood in front of the hallway mirror pretending to fix your hair for the third time while your stomach twisted itself into knots.
pathetic.
then the doorbell rings- even though your mom told you to stand at the door and open for them she quite sprinted to open the door. your mom happily opens the door, a loud, warm greeting comes from both your and miss tsukishmas mom. they pull eachother into a loving embrace, acting like its been centuries since they saw eachother but it was okay two weeks. you can help but let a soft smile appear on your face- the same scence reminds you alot if your own best friends, girlhood at its finest. miss tsukishma immediately starts talking and meanwhile you and kei are just standing awkwardly behind your guys mothers. keis frame is way taller than his moms, so you can see his facial expressions- he looks bored, like he desepertly wants to be somewhere else but here. you look away feeling hurt but keep your face emotionless.
he immediatly starts to take off his shoes and put it on a rack- his placed it on the rack. he sees your dress, smells your scent, and your painfully sad face thats still beatiful. when you guys were small and naughty, you guys had this thing of writing on furniture and decided to write your guys names on the wooden shoe rack with a perment marker. your heart ached slightly. all of you guys go sit in the lounge, when ever keis mom is over you dad decides to hang out with his friends- its like a little exchanged between your parents. your mother tells you to both keis mom and her some water but kei was already on his feet walking to the kitchen, already knowinf where the cups are, pouring them water. you sit in your usaul spot.
keis mom looks over at you with a tender gaze-she has always seen you as a daughter of her own since she only had boys. she notices the dress you're wearing. "i must say my taste is exquisite, you look so beautiful in this dress." she says lovingly. "stand up for me." she says with a smile, you stand up, straightening the front of thr dress slightly. she looks at you up and down "wow you grew some much- how are alreadly this tall." she contiunes "yeah..this is lovely, you, me and your mother should go shopping together. id love to buy you some more clothes." you chuckle sofly, being compliemented this much made you a bit flusted but you really do loves keis mom. shes so honest and caring. your mom smiles and agrees with keis mom. kei comes in the with the two cups of water and you sit down in your usaul spot, and he does too, the spot next you. but theres so much distance between you guys.
you glance at him over you shoulder, you hair gently coverinf your side profile so he cant really see but his looking at your guys moms talking. before you can say anything you mom talks to kei "you know kei its been forever since youd been over..whys that? too busy for your aunty now or what?" she teases, he lets out a small chuckle "you know aunt its never like that.. just been very busy with school. second last year of highschool and to say the work load and practice is draining is an understatment." he says and your mom nods, understanding. his mom speaks out "school is abusing thie children these days." your mom cant help but nod "look how tired they both are-" keis mom blurts out "especially him, he looks like his one inconvince away from collapsing." kei sighs softly "i can still hear you mom." he mutters. despite yourself a tiny smile almost appears on you face.
almost.
your mom and his mom are in their own world- chatting away. you get up to get something in kitchen but kei stops you. your eyebrows furrow slightly but sit back down. he looks down at you while he stood up "what do you want?" he ask monotoned. "sweets.." you say, slightly confused. he goes to the kitchen and gets it for you before settling back on the couch and hands the sweets to you like how he always did without thinking. the reason why he got it for you is because you were slightly limping from practice. he realized that he did it and it gets weird again. you mutter a small 'thanks' before opening the packets.
the moms notice the tension slightly, not fully, but enough to realise. your mom speaks up "why are you two acting like divorced parents?" kei looks up from his phone and you look up from thr packet of sweets that was laying in your lap. kei nearly chokes and you want the whole floor to swallow everything and everyone whole. your mother suddenly waves a hand dismissively. “kei, go sit with y/n while we finish talking. you two used to be attached at the hip anyway.”
your chest tightens.
used to.
your mom and keis mom go to the kitchen. you mom wanted to show her the new recipe she found on tiktok and wants her to try it. you need to get your mom off these apps immediatly.
you sigh softly, the tv playing in the background filling in the oppressive silence between you and kei. now its just silence, not angry silence, somethign that was familiar silence that turned uncomforable.
kei looks at your leg, remebering how you were slightly limping. kei hesitated for half a second before speaking out. his deep voice bounced off the walls, how'd it manage to get more depper- you thoughtd were quickly interupted by what he said. "you overtrained again." you blink "what?" you mutter not looking at him. "your knee," he says simply, like its the most ovibous thing. "you're limping."
oh.
you look at him, his blonde hair slightly messy and his glasses. fimalir, thats your bestfriend- so why does this feel forced. then you look away. "t's fine.." he hums in response. "mhm."
from the kitchen your mom laughs loudly at something and keis mom adds on to their inside joke.
while you and kei sit there quietly like strangers wearing the skin of old best friends.
beofore you cant stop yourself it comes out.
"are you avoiding me?" simple, direct, painful even.
and kei freezes, his thumb hovering over the screen of his phone.
because he has been avioding you, he doesnt even know how to explain why.
"you're overthinking it." he replies vaguely.
something snaps in you. all the built up anger, confusion, hurt and lack of answers catching up.
"you used to tell me everything, kei,"
"now i don't even know where i stand with this-us, you."
your tears well up in your eyes, unapolgetically. threating to spill.
and for the first time kei sees how much this has been hurting you and this isnt only affecting him, but you.
kei’s throat feels tight, the accusation landing harder than you intended.
but instead of looking hurt, his expression shifts into something flatter. guarded.it’s almost automatic.
“you’re being dramatic,” he mutters.
the words hit you like a slap.
your face falls slightly and kei notices immediately—but instead of taking it back, he leans further into the defense mechanism he’s built for himself over the years.
because if he acts unaffected first, maybe this won’t hurt as much.
“i’m serious,” you whisper.
kei exhales sharply through his nose, looking away from you and toward the tv like this conversation is exhausting him.
“so what? i’ve been busy lately. that suddenly means i hate you now?”
“that’s not what i said.”
“you implied it.”
his tone isn’t harsh exactly. just frustratingly dismissive.
like he’s trying to shrink the conversation before it gets too real.
you wipe your face quickly, embarrassed now for even bringing it up.
“forget that i said anything,” you mutter.
kei’s jaw tightens.
because he knows that tone.
the shut down tone.
the one you use when you’re genuinely hurt.
but he still doesn’t know how to fix this without making everything worse.
“you’re acting like i abandoned you or something,” he says quieter now, though it still sounds defensive.
you stare at him in disbelief.
“kei, you did.”
he immediately scoffs softly. “i’m literally here.”
“physically, yeah.”
that shuts him up for half a second.
your chest aches painfully.
“you used to talk to me about everything.” “now i barely know what’s going on in your life unless i hear it from someone else,”
“you keep pushing me away, im always here for you i made it clear, always have kei-“
kei rubs the back of his neck roughly, already irritated with himself for letting this conversation happen.
“people change.”
the second the words leave his mouth, regret flashes across his face.
small. quick. but there.
because your expression completely crumbles.
you nod slowly like you’re trying to convince yourself not to cry harder.
“right,” you whisper.
kei’s stomach twists unpleasantly.
he didn’t mean it like that.
he didn’t.
but every time he opens his mouth lately, things come out wrong around you.
you stand up quickly, needing space before you embarrass yourself further.
“where are you going?” kei asks immediately.
you laugh quietly wiping your tears with the back of your hand, fidgeting with your nails.
“relax, tsukishima. i just don’t wanna sit here and feel stupid anymore.”
his chest tightens painfully at that, he noticed how you used his last name.
because that’s the exact opposite of what he wanted.
you take another step away but kei speaks again before he can stop himself.
“i never said i didn’t want you around.”
you pause.
finally.
kei looks frustrated now—not at you, at himself.
his fingers tap restlessly against his knee.
“you just…” he starts before cutting himself off.
you wait quietly.
but he shakes his head.
“forget it.”
and somehow that hurts even more than the dismissiveness.
a.n: not proofread 💔😅✌🏼