Augustus Abrams @gradianauggie - Tumblr Blog

I might be 20 years old and therefore bias, but explain to me how my family could give up lively London for a place as boring as this. I really hope someone is about to show me why this move wasn’t a bad idea because I have regrets.

gradianauggie

Your nephews and nieces are offended and so am I. Go take a walk in the fucking countryside, enjoy nature a bit, huh. Better yet, enjoy one of the fine establishments in this wonderful fucking village that your family owns.

#amiabrxms

txbiaswilde:

We can’t go jinxing it before the race has even begun. Perhaps we can throw that energy into the campaign instead.

Whatever you need, love.

#txbiaswilde

txbiaswilde:

Perhaps we shouldn’t get too ahead of ourselves, darling.

Too late, I’m so fucking far ahead I can’t even see you anymore. We’re going to have a fucking champagne fountain in your honor. That’s how confident I am.

#txbiaswilde

txbiaswilde

Well, I am very pleased to announce that you are looking at an official candidate for the Labour party in the upcoming local election next month. I’ve long considered getting into politics in an effort to make vital changes to benefit the north east, and with Emerson having started nursery full time now, this seems like the perfect time to make this goal a reality.

I do hope I can count on the support of you all — in hopes that a lot of you will be voting Labour, of course — and if so, am looking forward to working towards implementing the changes you all want to see.

gradianauggie

I’ve no doubt of your inevitable victory, love. I’ll start planning the celebrations now.

#txbiaswilde

txbiaswilde:

Are you trying to say you had low expectations of me?

Never, love. I did have very low expectations of the players, however.

Originally posted by karanliksular

#txbiaswilde #ew. imagine a beard.

txbiaswilde

Well, the Charity Week was nothing short of a huge success. A lot of money raised for many recipients — i’m thinking of maybe even making it an annual or bi-yearly event. You can never give too much to the community, after all.

gradianauggie

And the poker games weren’t nearly as disappointing as I thought they’d be. A very nice surprise.

#txbiaswilde

Would you cheat on your s/o for a billion pounds?

Oh fuck off. I value my fucking partner. Wouldn't cheat on him for anything. And I've got all the money I need anyway so that's a shit motivation to ruin the best thing in my life.

@txbiaswilde

#anon #about:tobias

texts 📲 ( auggie & alfie. )

alfie: wanna do fake proposals at fancy restaurants for free food?

auggie: Why on God's green Earth would I want to do that with you?

#texts #alfiesmythe

Are you happy?

Fuck yes, I am. Got me a well run business, the most handsome man around, and our beautiful children. I'm on top of the bloody world.

boxers or briefs?

It's gotta be briefs. Boxers are just fucking uncomfortable.

ghcstfm

I’m pretty new around here so I don’t know all the details, but is it true you’re trying to fuck your boyfriend’s brother?

uhm no?? do i look like the sort of man who’d try and fuck his boyfriends brother?? fuck no, I’m classy, however am I actively trying to fuck my ex-boyfriends brother? yes, It’s called giving him a gift, that gift is me, now all I gotta do is wait for him to unwrap me.

gradianauggie

I’m going to stage a tragic accident one of these days, Theodore.

#ghcstfm

If you could go back in time and tell your 7 year old self anything, what would it be? Why?

Don't get shot in the knee, fucking idiot.

#anon

patrick-stclarington

It has been strangely quiet crime-wise in this village lately. I know I’ve just cursed myself by using the ‘q’ word but I am getting concerned that all of the criminals have just left the village.