piercing gold hues would stare absently toward the floor. voice of his father reaching his ears and willingly does the son listen with care.
with care... he could remember when the mere sight of his father would cause him to become enraged or even force him to go into hiding as to avoid a confrontation but time and patience... forgiveness, had taken place for a long time, even though the white-haired knight knew not how to approach the man.
“ that is not entirely why i am here... father, ”
he swallowed, that word almost making him stutter. when had been the last time he called this man his father? had he ever even spoken those words to him?
“ what say you to all of this? you say you will not stop me but i know you have something to say. i will hear your words but i will inform you of my knowledge. i am unaware of the difficulties you and sir percival are going through right now so please do not misunderstand and think that i am doing this to spite you... ”
his gaze moves upwards toward his father, eyes that were typically devoid of any emotion were now glossed over, threatening to spill tears at any moment.
— it stings...
“ i am simply tired of this loathing i hold toward you. the longer i am here, the more i become tired of it. i don’t know what to do. ”
body shakes and fingers grip the cloth on his own chest. a free hand would attempt to shield his face from his father’s view. when had he become so... emotional? a child who hardly knew what a smile was... someone who did not shed a tear in life. left by both of his parents, raised to know his ultimate fate. to become the knight of god, living only for his will and the will of his king. emotions had been locked away. to die.
“ i’m tired of it. i just want to have a relationship with my father that is not tainted with resent. i am tired of being alone. i have been afraid of my life since i first understood that the life given to me was not actually my life to live. i resented you and my mother for giving me this life filled with choices that were never choices to begin with. i locked away all of my emotions to accept the fate that was dealt to me since birth and i have grown tired of living this way.”
his composure falters. the facade that had become his own- but was it truly a facade if he had never shown his true being to himself? the knight shuts his eyes tightly, tears freely falling now.
“ forgive this foolish son of yours for the pain he has put you through. ”
snowghoul
titsay
gummygunk
origamiaround
romaincrisis
jacobvanloon
