Figured you would be the right person to send this Ask to. What exactly is a tar-heeled New Yorker?
Other than sounding like something that was farted out of a trendy hipster unicorn’s ass, I have no idea. I know what it isn’t. It isn’t someone who rolls into town now and then, takes in the sights, goes to shows and museums, and for local “flavor” eats a slice of pizza without a knife and fork before moving on to greener, sunnier, safer places. It isn’t someone who takes the subway for fun. It isn’t someone who thinks going to Brooklyn is slumming it with the rest of the cool kids.
No, a New Yorker is someone who takes the subway because they must. Someone who can tell exactly which nationalities are in the subway car with them just by the smell of which spice is oozing out of their pores at 8:00 in the morning. Fancy some Italian, Polish, Indian, Chinese, Mexican for lunch? It’s because those seeds were planted subliminally early that morning while you were simultaneously trying to keep the degenerate behind you from putting his hand up your skirt.
No, if there were such a thing as a tar heeled New Yorker it would be the neighborhood girls who inadvertently step in oozing 100 degree melting tar while tanning themselves up on Tar Beach (apartment rooftops). Or the kids, whose only way to cool off it to run shoeless on melting city streets under the fire hydrants. Those are the only tar heeled New Yorkers that I know of or, at least, the only ones deserving of the name.
Or from walking barefoot on the boardwalk at Coney Island or Jones Beach @fromheretoeternity1121. The smell of tar always reminds me of the beach…
That damn bio should read born in NC, grew up in Amish country, maybe educated at UNC, moved to NY hoping to get a job…still waiting.
NYer my ass…
Oh, dear Lord, I LOVE my New York ladies!!!!!!
Lol, @heyitsmeme….I’m thinking that NCers would’ve kicked her ass outta that state!
There is no way this girl is associated with university of North Carolina.
