- The Queen - @growsbetweenthepines - Tumblr Blog

borntohorny

matchagirl

i’ve been reading and drinking tea all afternoon

growsbetweenthepines

I've been reading and drinking* all afternoon

perfectquote

“Life is not about who you once were. It’s about who you are right now, and the person you have the potential to be.”

— Unknown

un-gif-dans-ta-gueule

The Dreamer

crlhmulher

sunshine-avalanche

Do you think this is a pretty sight? This is the reality of having anorexia for 12+ years. The reality of what eating disorders can do to your body.

When I was in high school and then in college getting my bachelors degree, I spent more time in hospitals and treatment centers than I did out of them.

And then I found out

My organs failed. Permanently.

Last year, I needed major surgery that took about 4 HOURS, and after that I was admitted to the hospital for a week on heavy pain medications, being wheeled around because I couldn’t walk.

I had tubes everywhere.

I had to medically withdraw from graduate school because I had to spend that time in doctors offices, infusion centers for IVs, in the ER, or admitted into the hospital.

Now I have a 6 inch scar across my abdomen and will be on medications for the rest of my life to help my heart and stomach function enough to keep me alive.

I’ve nearly died multiple times from the ED, but I had never believed that my organs could shut down and leave me to deal with that reality for the rest of my life.

That is not a way anyone should have to live life.

This is what an eating disorder looks like. Not the “thinspo” everyone sees on the Internet. This is what you don’t see behind those pictures and it’s not pretty.