Gyan

[gyanshare]

Learn to move on & free your brain.. will you ?

You were Cheated? You were hurt? You were sidelined?

If you remember any of the above, do remember that some % of your brain is occupied keeping these memories intact. 

Spend some time calculating how many of those 8760 hours a year did you  spend thinking about the beauty, goodness and happiness around you and how much more you can add. 

My personal and most successful way of bringing peace to my life is by getting rid of “What if” scenarios. What If I am not able to do that job right? What if I loose my job? What if my ill family member passes away? What if I have no money for my survival? It’s is easier said than done and I have gone through this as well so let me share with you something which I promise will help you forget “What if” and I also promise that you will be a step ahead of “What if” and that is:

Where/What do I want to be ?

This means you are not waiting for things to happen to you but you are planning them and actually deciding and dictating what things should be for you and here are some examples:

- I want to have $10 Mil when I turn 45

- I want to have a house on the mountains 

- I want to drive a sports car

- I want to live a loan free life 

Literally build a roadmap for yourself and under each “Where/what do I want to be” write 5 steps to get there.

Here is an example that I can share:

I wanted to have a house of my own before I turned 35 so I bought a house on loan/ mortgage when I was 25 and decided to pay the entire amount in 10 years. An average working class individual went for a 20 years mortgage which was almost the norm then but I had my route map clear so I almost doubled the monthly instalment to the bank and finally managed to have a fully paid house (loan-free) when I was 35.

[gyanshare]

Convert Negatives to Positive and your positivity multiplies

There was a time when I always used to pray to god to give me materialistic happiness like money in my bank account, a nice car to drive, my own house, ability to go to five star hotels without thinking twice, branded cloths. While I haven’t become one of the top guys yet but I have got enough to realise that this can only take you to a level of happiness and after that it has to be beyond materialistic happiness. 

You know, it is very easy to identify the most negative person around you so try this. Think of your social circle and identify that one person who always complains about his life, his finances, happiness in general and imagine if you have more than 50% of such people in your circle what will you be hearing day in and day out :) It’s tough. 

I found many such people. Initially, I used to get dragged into all this very easily and that had a big impact on me but later I realised the magnitude of that impact and I started distancing myself from them. What a relief it was. Slowly and gradually I started disconnecting with such people on social media (This one was easy), friend circle, relatives, cousins etc but soon I realised this was a very selfish solution (Not wrong though).

I decided to do something about it and did some experimenting again. Here is what I figured (Tried and Tested):

A- Some people are negative because of their upbringing. They probably learn to complain about everything through out their Childhood

B- Some people are negative because of consequences - Bad health, dissatisfying job, unpleasant relationships, lack of basic amenities

I tried working with the category A (From above) but failed miserably and so much that I started to think like them which further impacted a lot of stuff so I decided to use my original selfish method of keeping away (May not be the best one). 

I then started working with category B and you know what - half of the work will be done if you really carefully listen to them. Just listen and let them vent out. It is very important to take all the disturbance off their mind. Do this multiple times without supporting any of their negative statements. Ask questions to further probe their complains (Example below) and do this again and again. Remember: All this while you have to encourage them and talk about their qualities too. 

Example: 

Category B: You know I haven’t been promoted for the past 3 years and I am super frustrated

My Interaction: 

-How many people got promoted in your team?

-Did you do any special project to draw management attention ?

-Did you get any executive appreciation ?

-Are you getting your increments fine ?

[gyanshare]

Feel it, See it and you will have it. Can you ?

I have been trying this for a very long time now. Sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally but I have seen great results. Let me share with you. All of us want to achieve so many things in life. For example: I want a very nice and luxurious apartment of my own despite having a good house already. 

Now what the definition of a nice and luxurious apartment ? Here are some of the definitions that come to my mind but these are not helpful enough:

- A 3000 Sq Ft apartment 

- A four bedroom hall apartment

- An apartment with Modular kitchen, bath tubs in every batch room etc

Despite all this, when I try to visualize how exactly my drawing room should look I am not able to. Which means I am still not clear about my own wish / demand. So here is what I am in the process of doing. Take pictures from internet some thing like the following:

- Your best family picture where everyone is smiling

-Take up best pictures of Drawing room, Bed room, Bath room and put them together to make them look like a house

- Your favorite car that you want to own

- Copy of a text message similar to the one you get from your bank account (With the figure you want in it)

Put all of this in one chart paper and that should be placed somewhere so that you can see it atleast 10 times a day. Refer to my article mind games. You can use these pictures put together to train your mind / brain to believe that all of this is yours and that’s how your brain will give you ideas to get towards it. Let me know if I confused you and I will be happy to explain as this is my favorite subject. 

[gyanshare]

Take what you want #easy

I recently met one of my favorite bosses from the past and, after a long time. But we are used to it now. We meet for a couple of hours once in two years, we exchange thoughts and ideas and we congratulate each other on achievements. 

This time we did the same but our conversation was slightly different. He is now increasingly focusing on spirituality which in simple terms means “above all the basic needs of life”. This time it was my turn to get appreciated so he said - “Kul, you have created everything you have achieved in your career” and he made me think. 

Guess what, he was so right. I looked back 12-13 years of my life and I remember having a notepad where I used to draw what I wanted for myself. This included my job, designations, compensation, the kind of car I drive and the kind of kid I wanted. Whatever I have achieved in the last 10 years is mostly in line with that. I have had some failures (Very Few) but I think I know the reasons why I failed. 

There is a very easy (but can only be implemented gradually) way to get things that you want in life but one must start small, take one step at a time. 

[gyanshare]

Variation on your mind !!

Some of us have this problem / habit of making quick / failed decisions which is basis some recent events in their life. These can be emotional, inspirational etc. 

Example: I was watching CNBC (TV Channel) once and saw some shares moving up and down out of which one of the shares that I knew of was moving in the upward direction. That was it, I took no time to invest money in the market and in no time I lost most of what I had invested. 

These are called Hasty decisions and can only be right accidentally. 

[gyanshare]

Connect with Positive People !!

Positive Means - Those who don't complaint, those who always smile, those who don't dislike anyone

I connect with a lot of positive people and I can keep talking about them but there is this recent connect that I will quickly mention.

I have this very sweet female friend who I consider my little sister. We know each other for sometime but never connected mentally really and when we did we both found out about each others interest.

All I want to say for now is  - connect with positive people and share any one learning that you get from them.

[gyanshare]

There is an Opportunity in everything that happens to us..

Good and Bad things keep happening to us and that's how life is supposed to be but do you know - you can get a good thing out of everything that happens to you in your life. (I think it is too confusing)

So here is what I mean - A lot of times we complain about a few things and think "Why did this happen to me?", "Why me?", "God, why do you always do this to me?" but I would like you to know that there was a good opportunity in everything bad that happened to you. 

Some real life examples:

A dear friend lost her job - After 3 months she got a better one

Another friend lost his job - He used his free time in a certification that got him a better paying job

There are a lot more examples from my personal life which I am not able to share but what I can share is - whenever you are not happy about something, think of how can you use that opportunity. 

- You loose some money - Think of how you can earn more

-You loose your job - think of why you lost it and what can you do to get a better one

-Someone cheats you -  think of how you can be more careful next time

It will be great if you could share your real life examples.

[gyanshare]

Was it really your money ?

In some recent experiences, I lost some money because of someone else's mistake. Surprisingly I wasn't too worried. It happened so naturally that I didn't even feel the pain of losing money.

After some weeks when I was thinking about it  - I realized that around a month (or Two) ago someone else was in a similar situation because of me. Where I escaped after scratching someone else's car without paying for the losses.

So -

-If someone takes your money and doesn't return

-You loose money in a bet, game, accident

Don't worry too much about it because that money never belonged to you. You lost it because you took someone else's. Now try and relate it to your most recent loses and let me know if this links well.

PS: Trying to put my thoughts to write something on meditation. Also, you see some pictures along with text going forward.

[gyanshare]

Negative to positive

When someone talks about you or gossips about you, their most obvious intention is to show you down.  We have to keep in mind one very important thing that we should not at all get affected with such people and their gossips.

By not getting affected we give a very strong unintentional  message to that person and the message is “you don’t exist for me”.

This is actually a long topic which I will detail out some other time but for now just remember one thing,  if people talk about you -“good” or “bad” - YOU ARE IMPORTANT. .. feel good. ..

[gyanshare]

Appreciation Leads to Appreciation

 Do you like appreciation? Of course you do. Everyone does. Even I do.

Do some home work and try to recollect when was the last time you appreciated someone. What was that appreciation like? Was it genuine? Was it detailed? Not sure what the answer is but I know if it wasn't genuine then its not good enough. The person who got appreciated by you will never feel it if it's not genuine.

Now my tried and tested statement here is: Appreciation Leads to Appreciation i.e. If you like to be appreciated, appreciate appreciate and appreciate. Everyday you should appreciate one person and the appreciation should be genuine.

What to appreciate? Interesting question but the answer is not difficult. Even the smallest of things can be appreciated. examples:

- Appreciated people for responding to your emails

-Appreciate people for meeting you

-Appreciate people for calling you

-Appreciate your mom (I am trying to do this one) for cooking for you

Finding a reason for appreciation is really easy but keep in mind: appreciation has to be backed up by the reason for appreciation.

Golden Tip: Appreciate people (Genuine) who you don't like

Try this and let me know.

[gyanshare]

Give to Get !!

Take 5 minutes to think what do you want in the next two to three years of your life. Here is what I want: Happiness, Good Health, Good Job and good money. Now that we know what we want, start giving:

Give Happiness: To all who you can, to all who are around. A better way to do this is  - "Don't hurt anyone"

Good Health: help those who are not healthy. Help poor, Donate Medicines

God Job: Help people at work. Guide them, teach them and do what it takes for the others to get a good job

Good Money: Donate !!

I have tried many of these and got good success. So want to give this gyan to others. I am sure it will work.

[gyanshare]

Change your habits !!

  I am talking about only BAD habits by the way. One of the common bad habits identified by me is “Bad Mouthing” about people. I know this is something we have been hearing since childhood and hence it sounds like gyan but my reasoning is a little different for NOT bad mouthing.

After explaining my point of view, I am going to write an exercise that all can try and see immediate results. So, why should we not bad mouth about people? All of us have some friends (Close friends) who we only meet for gossiping (-ve gossip is what I mean). Let’s go to the flashback and think – Guess what, you will realize that these friends are only used for gossiping J nothing else at all. Whenever you meet them you end up talking negative about people.

Impact of Bad- Mouthing

You need to go back and check and I can tell you with 100% confidence that the people who you bad mouth about, do exactly the same about you. Try it and let me know. (Comment on my blog).

[gyanshare]

Mind Game

  Something very different and real but playing it as a game will keep you interested in this. Now you know what your current state is and what your desired (Better) state is. Start drawing, creating a simulation of your desired state. There are many ways of doing it and here are some of the ways I have tried – Simple pencil drawings on a piece of paper, copying pictures from google, use smart art on computers. Draw everything you want to be, everything you want around, everything you need in your desired state. Your dream home, your office in the organization you want to work with, your new home, you favorite holiday destination. Always keep these drawings and pictures around you and make your mind believe that you already have these things around. Once it gets to your mind, it will get to your brain. Remember, brain is the control room of our body and once your pictures and drawings go to your brain through your mind, your brain will make your body act in accordance with what you had put on a piece of paper. Your actions will talk to your brain and hence to your pictures. There is more to it. Try this with small things and that will take you to big ones.

[gyanshare]

Current State to a Better State

Before starting our journey we always know our start and end point i.e. we know where we are going to start our journey from and we also know where we are going and unless we know the way to our end point, we don’t start our journey. Not only this, we also find out the time required for us to cover our journey. So, we should have a similar plan in place to be able to move our life from the current state to a better desired state. Without knowing where we want to be and how does it feel after being there, it’s pointless to want to move our life to a better state.

Definition of “better state” – What do you want to feel when you get there, what all things do you want around you then, what you think will be different for you once you reach that stage. Believe me or not but one has to write all this or draw all of this to be able to know it right.

[gyanshare]

Brain Transformation

Brain – Head of the family in our Body. All that we do, we feel, we want, we accept, we wish is directed by the Brain. In mechanical language, it’s the control room of our body. Do you ever wonder how does all this happen? Let me give you some idea with an example which is off this topic.

The CEO of a company is the one who is appointed to manage the company, look at the market conditions and make strategies in order to keep the organization moving in the right direction. Our brain works pretty much the same way. It takes into account the environment, people around, external conditions, weather and a lot more and accordingly gives directions to our body and body parts.

What I am going to tell you now can become a life changing surprise for you - We can transform our brain by controlling the external conditions. So we can control external conditions, external conditions can control our Brain and Brain can control our body which means we can control our brain and our own acts. Did I confuse you? I am going to make it much simpler for you by giving you some tips on how to do this and get your life in a better state than current state.

I am writing what I know. Haven't made it public yet but if anyone is reading it, I would love to know how they feel.