bliss lane
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Sweet Seals For You, Always
One Nice Bug Per Day
roma★
Andulka
tannertan36
Fai_Ryy
ojovivo
Game of Thrones Daily
cherry valley forever
Discoholic 🪩
No title available
@theartofmadeline
🩵 avery cochrane 🩵
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Doug Jones
EXPECTATIONS
h
almost home
seen from Bangladesh
seen from Mexico
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from Liberia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Vietnam
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Colombia
seen from United States
seen from Argentina
seen from Cambodia
seen from Thailand
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@h4nds0m3-j4ck
Polish off my drink, or my dick, whatever works to get you begging for me to be inside you right now. @jimothy-schmawrence
fuck, uh. okay. someone's in a mood.
You're my bitch, does puppy want a treat or are you just going to yap until I force ya?
Polish off my drink, or my dick, whatever works to get you begging for me to be inside you right now. @jimothy-schmawrence
The games rigged from the start, sweetheart. It's just all fun and games until I decide it's over.
It's great how much my fans love me. If they didn't have anyone to fawn and jizz their pants over, who else would they cum to? My existence is practically community service.
I get off to knowing that in the darkest deepest corners of your mind, I'm there. You can't get rid of me, even when I'm gone.
And I'm just stabbing you over and over again, and you're too stupid to realize that it's because you want me to babe.
I get that you hate me because you're ugly and pathetic and insecure, but could ya at least come a little closer so I could squeeze the sad excuse of a life you have out of you? Thanks, pumpkin. ❤️
I love making vaguely-human filth squirm in their seat. They don't believe in a God, but they sure as hell believe in me. Doesn't that make me something special?
You know, breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Guess what I ate this morning?
Serial. Brand name is Murder
Nothing more refreshing than popping grapes and cherries.
Were you drunk when you gave out the numbers to your doppelgangers or what scheme did you use?
Cup Sizes
@jimothy-schmawrence
What would you do if you met your female version?
AND...
Have you ever considered proposing to Nisha?
Answer both questions
Let me pretend these questions are unrelated for a second,
1. Exactly everything you think would happen, but I just cannot imagine for the life of me what a "female" version would even look like or act like..
2. Proposal is a bit too much commitment for her tastes. So, if anyone proposes it would have to be her. But I think her bite marks say enough for me.
You have the most grippable, tiniest, grabbable waist and it pisses me off
39 - 28 - 36, babe ♥️
That my locker combo or my mesurrments?
So I decided to start reading a book on anger managment for IED before bed, because I'm in a "self improvement" phase and I made the mistake of forgetting the following:
1. They're usually for troglodytes who don't read.
2. The people who write them are equally stupid, overcompensatory, and pretentious, and I hate them
That's it. The catharsis of tossing the book in my fireplace barely made up for it. The fucking irony.
Also who the fuck quotes Edison...????
buckle your knees looking up at me, and beg me to spare thee the back of my hand.
Hot 🔥🔥🔥
Fun Fact: Main Character by Will Wood is set as my Alarm in the mornings.
Also, do you guys realize how much of a greedy evil little bastard Timothy is? @jimothy-schmawrence
"If red touches yellow, you're a dead fellow
If red touches black, you're okay, Jack"
- My sweetheart of a dry cleaners' handwritten note on the back of our first reciept~
I have it framed on my wall, and a Manila with every reciept she's given me since. Love you, Laura!
Some others:
"I don't want to know"
"You should just replace these.."
"Somehow I cleaned it, but I didn't think it would be possible this time. You're welcome <3"
"Jack, darling, at least wear an apron next time."
"Thank you for the practice and the business, darling, it's always a pleasure~"
Reblogging two days late for Valentines, Sorry I was on a bender the past week. Luv u Timmy <3~ @jimothy-schmawrence
Anyone watch How To Be A Serial Killer? It stars Dameon Clarke. Go do that.~ It doesn't get nearly as much attention as it should.
It's a must watch on my weekends off when I'm craving some recreational violence on top of my already prescribed violence regimen.
Bart is adorable, reminds me of two special someones.
