💕

[comagarden]

maybe we will be keychains on the same key ring in the next life

[pavitraprabhakars]

just did a hit of pillow and blanky

[random-jot]

If Stranger Things was british

[greelin]

being alive is great because there are so many different vegetables you can sauté. but then there are also the horrors

[mohansabbot]

Stranger Things + text posts pt. 5

[sevaria]

honey the killer from scream is on the phone and he wants to know your pronouns

[ampervadasz]

[24ozsteak]

[schizoauthoress]

Today I learned that Van Halen have that rider in their contract about “a bowl of M&Ms with all the brown ones removed” in order to know at a glance if the promoter read the entire contract.  And the reason they do THAT is because they once had a stage collapse because a promoter hadn’t read the proper way to set up all the specific technical stuff.

So if the band goes in the dressing room or catering and sees brown M&Ms, they know they have to double-check the stage setup for safety.

[darkfrog24]

I heard about this on Freakonomics Radio.  Turns out the bit about no brown M&Ms is HUGE, in BIG font, bold, underlined and quotated like they’re on the Group W Bench.

The band was all, “We have fifty-pound lights hanging over our heads and fire being shot out of cannons.  We had to know whether they read our safety regs so we didn’t flamebroil any roadies.”

[gobbochune-deactivated20241018]

interesting how this has become a meme in the music industry about divas. i’ve always heard jokes that amount to “this stuck up celebrity hates the green gummy bears!! they’re refusing to perform just for that???” and its reading stuff like this that i realise how that joke might have come about. people get grumpy that the band refuses to play but cant admit its because THEY’RE incompetent, so they make it all about the M&Ms. another example of artists using a creative method to ensure they have a perfectly reasonable request fulfilled that is then bastardised by lazy people who wanna make money off them. 

[thesylverlining]

…this is like the music industry version of hearing the truth behind the McDonalds hot coffee lawsuit

[pglang]

girls will "🥺🥺🥺🥺" their way out of everything

[kate-boosh]

So Will puss in boots

[cannibaltree]

being horny is so fucking stupid. if you horny you’re immediately a dumbass. that person could literally just be wearing a t shirt and the sight of their collarbone feels like you just snorted a line of coke. god fucking forbid they wear pants rolled over their ankles. you’re foaming at the mouth and crounched on the floor like a fucking animal. you catch the sight of (1) toned muscle? flatlined. dead.

[dude-bro-tm]

This also works for craving romantic attention. Like, they smiled? I'm in tears. Our gazes meet? My heart is fluttering. If I receive a single complement from them, I an proposing.

[nyanbinyuri]

posts that make you understand repressed victorian gentlemen upon witnessing a fair maiden’s scandalously exposed ankle 

[hydro-homies]

Can confirm this

[meckamecha]

Modern laundry sauce doesn’t cause color leaching like old laundry sauce did

[starlightandtears]

…..call it something else

[theponyarchive]

clothes marinade

[mysticalcoffeequeen]

Fabric Juice

[democraticsenator]

me liveblogging the pitfalls of my life on this hellion website for the past 7 years

[manlethotline]

being an adult and buying your own shit is so weird i don't understand why anything is priced the way it is. why did my tattoo cost 8 toothpastes? why does a pair of socks cost a sandwich but a fancy dinner costs a whole jacket? why is book the same cost as 2 bag frozen vegetables? nothing makes sense i just wanna steal.

[wizardgender]

this is why marx wrote that book

there are reasons! go read the book!

[depsidase]

[fruitsoftheweb]

“Dildo-LeLe Sex 8.85 Inches Unique Corn Shape Silicone Dildo with Suction Base”

[clunce-deactivated20210412]

now even city girls can make do

[whitepeopletwitter]

[shiftythrifting]

[pleaseexorciseme]

John Mulaney, a man who is iconically known for loving his wife, after being told by Jerry Seinfeld that his wife only thinks shes good at something

[jackironsides]

Well done OP, you’ve managed to capture the moment John’s spirit left his body

[ryrosryhoe]

Jerry’s lucky that John is too polite to throw hands

[bonepoem]

Okay but I just went and watched this for myself and it’s WORSE

He’s. So uncomfortable. It’s obvious. I cut out the part where John kind of muttered, “That is true, isn’t it” about how all men think they’re funny, but his face is just screwed up in this ‘oh god what have i done what have i signed up for this is not good and this will probably go into my next comedy special of awkwardness’

[jukebox-head]

Just watched this omg bless john bc jerry just keeps trying to do some “take my wife” bullshit and john very politely goes no, no.

[cryptiboy]

proud of John for restraining himself from murdering a man on camera

[wintersoldierfell]

What’s so horrifying about this to me is that this is literally Jerry Seinfeld trying to teach John Mulaney how to gaslight his wife.

Look at that dialogue. “She thinks she knows.” He’s trying to get Mulaney to see his wife’s expertise as instead a weird misperception. He’s coaching him to undercut his wife’s confidence in the truth and her own abilities.

And Mulaney replies exactly the right way: “She does know.” He asserts not only that she’s perceiving the world accurately, but that she is an expert at something he’s not good at.

Dudes, don’t take this shit from other dudes. Mulaney isn’t by any means perfect but he aced this. Stand for the truth. Defend women’s objectivity. Promote women’s expertise.

[randomthingsthatilike1]

Doesnt his wife also work with antiques too?like. Isnt that part of her actual job?

[thechy-fychannel]

I reblog this every time because I don’t think people understand that Anna is literally an interior designer. She makes absolutely stunning Victorian Lampshades. Which she designs.. for the interior of a home… she’s literally an interior designer. She doesn’t think she’s good at it, she knows she’s good at it because it’s her fucking job