My favourite movie at Christmas time this year was The Polar Express. In fact, I’ve still been watching it almost daily and it’s waaaaay past Christmas now. Maybe next year I’ll be invited aboard.
I didn’t realise there were so many things to do before Christmas. I had to write my letter to Santa, bake gingerbread cookies and buy a Christmas tree!
I was also forced to learn my numbers or else I couldn’t have my chocolate from my advent calendar. I learnt them soooo well that I could open my Ma’s advent calendar too and am soooo civilized that I could explain to her why she should be sharing her chocolate.
I visited Rudolph and the other reindeers at Sea World before they had to head to the North Pole. They also had snow there and I took a sled ride!
Grandma Kitty was visiting over Christmas and on Christmas Eve we went bike riding around Balboa Park. We found the Grinch’s Christmas Tree!
And some nutcracker soldiers!
Before I knew it, I woke up on Christmas morning...
I couldn’t believe it when I had a whole stocking stuffed with Hot Wheels! I must have been really good!
Mama and I had these super cool matching PJs on Christmas. Dada didn’t seem to be jealous but... I knew he secretly was.
When I went downstairs I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw all of the presents so I ran around in a circle as fast as I could until I fell over in the middle of the floor.
I was sooo lucky and got really cool presents including a Fire Station and Lego Police Station. I stayed inside and played ALL day.
The next day apparently we had to leave to get some fresh air. So I said a dramatic farewell to my toys as I took my scooter for a ride around Mission Bay. I took a short break from riding so I could practice writing my favourite letter in the sand. H for Harrison!
Then treated myself to another break with Grandma by a tree. And by break I mean, trying to entice her into a game of chase.
I knew how much Grandma likes trains, so I took her up the coast on the blue train (my favourite).
I allowed her to sunbathe while I entertained myself on the beach.
And soaked up some rays myself.
We spotted SO MANY construction vehicles on the tracks. I was worried some people would miss them, so I shouted them out as loudly as I could so everyone in the carriage would know of the excitement.
The last things we did with Grandma before she had to go home, we took her on a nice muddy walk to Mission Trails and to see the sea lions at La Jolla.
Why was I the only one in rain boots? Appropriate footwear next time guys!
Lastly, we took her to La Jolla as we’d never taken Grandma there before! And after the sea lions we ate french fries and onion rings to our hearts content. The perfect send off!
Wow, it’s been a while. I’ve been doing so many things!
Firstly, I haven’t posted a photo of my Halloween outfit:
Don’t be scared, it’s not a real ghost. Just me, Harrison.
Soon after that, Grandma, Grandpa and Uncle Tom arrived.
Of course, the first morning Uncle Tom and I had to pop down the road for donuts.
Before heading over the Coronado bridge to Grandma and Grandpa’s hotel where I went swimming in the hot tub the whole entire day.
The next day, Uncle Tom and I started out our day with coffee... and then more donuts.
And then.... more hot tub time. I was in serious need of this vacation.
On their last day in San Diego, it was Grandma Ali’s 60th birthday so we thought we better celebrate by hanging out in the hot tub some more. We also took a walk on the beach to build some sandcastles.
And went out for dinner. But that’s not my kind of thing, so I just went to sleep instead.
The following day we headed to Palm Springs for Thanksgiving week. It was pretty freezing in the evenings but I needed my sunglasses on at this restaurant because of the ginormous fire in the middle of our table. I didn’t know we were allowed to have fires on table. Note to self: remember that and find some matches.
There were so many activities to keep me busy. Riding pretend bikes around town...
More hot tub time...
Watching tarantula’s on TV with Auntie Katie and Uncle James...
Taking a trip on the bus...
Eating bread rolls for Thanksgiving dinner and turning my nose up at everything else...
And finally, trying to join in but being left out of every game being played...
We also took a cable car up this huge enormous mountain!
It was really freezing but also very sunny, and then just as we were arriving back from our hike, some clouds blew over and it started to snow!
My favourite time of year!! Pumpkins, Halloween decorations, fancy dress, spiders and ghosts. It’s pretty awesome. But now that I think about it, I do like all of the other seasons as my favourites too. Winter has Christmas, Spring is my birthday and summer means beaches and swimming pools. How fun is life?
I’ve been keeping so busy since I arrived back from England. Mainly hanging with my homies. On an aircraft carrier...
At the air show...
At the zoo...
Keeping cool...
At various beaches...
Anyway - back to Autumn. We had SO much to do in so little time. Firstly I was trying really hard to decide what my Halloween outfit would be. At first it seemed obvious. Construction worker. Done. But then I realised that maybe I wanted to be a super scary snake! Or maybe a ghost. This was tough. Why do I have to make these kinds of decisions at my age? It’s too much!
So leaving that one until later, I got to work on my calendar.
First up was a trip to a Pumpkin Patch. And I don’t just mean the magic Pumpkin Door that opened at Trader Joe’s, although I visit that about three times a week, closely examining each pumpkin. I mean to a real pumpkin farm!
There was also a sunflower field at the farm too. It was coming to the end of their season... So they were a tad wilted. I ran through them anyway! We found SO MANY ladybugs!
After we’d finished here, Pa had an idea to show me my hometown. Mexico. Since we were only a few minutes from the border, we drove over there.
Ma counted four of these signs on the walk down to the beach, I don’t think she likes snakes.
I trudged the long lonely road, with the US to the left, and the colourful houses of Mexico to my right.
I was feeling run down after the mile long walk in the sun, but my energy suddenly came back when I saw the beach. I gave my parents two options - I go skinny dipping, or I go swimming full clothed. They said to stay out of the water. I don’t believe that was an option. I pretended to honour their wishes for a while, but oh no! The ocean caught me! They didn’t seem surprised.
Luckily I’m not THAT good of a swimmer, or I might have tried to swim around the wall that splits the countries up and goes all the way into the ocean! I mean, it sounded like they were having way more fun in Mexico, I could hear the beach parties! And maybe there they might serve me a margarita?
The next day we visited a really cool nature reserve. Nothing to do with the Fall Season, but they were having a special visiting day so we headed down to check it out.
They had lots of animals that they had rescued from the San Diego Bay. Including sharks and giant turtles! I didn’t know they lived so close to us.
My favourite tank was the Finding Nemo one, but I don’t think they rescued them from the Bay. They also had two people holding snakes! Pa and I went to say hello to them while Ma hid.
There was also an ambulance there and I was so interested in learning all about it, and then the medics taught me how to do CPR! I concentrated really hard and think my form was pretty good.
That’s all for now, until next weekend!
Here is my movie of my trip to England this summer. I had to make amendments to the soundtrack, due to Taylor Swift not letting me use her songs! My sincerest apologies for that. Enjoy!
My Pa was on holiday from school and so that usually means we have visitors coming. But it had been a few weeks and no one had arrived yet! So it didn’t come as a surprise when one afternoon we headed to the airport.
Turned out it was Ben! I know him well because he always sends me videos (I have to steal my Mama’s phone to reply to them, don’t tell her). I knew from the first day this guy was cool, because he took me on an extensive tour of the snakes at the zoo.
Then in the evening, I wanted to show off my dance moves so we took him to a concert in the park. He wasn’t nearly as good at dancing as me!
We asked him what he wanted to do in San Diego and he said, “Go to the beach!” which happens to be my favourite thing to do, so we were getting off to a wonderful start! Firstly we took him to my fave beach - Kellogg Beach.
There aren’t any waves so I could show him my swimming skills. “LOOK AT ME BEN!!!” I yelled every time he looked at something other than me.
We also took him to Pacific Beach. I had to ditch him and go surfing by myself though, he just couldn’t keep up the pace. Wanted to sunbathe and go exploring or something.
The third beach we took him to was called Laguna Beach. This is like, the BEST beach. But it’s all the way up in Orange County, so we don’t go there often. We stopped off here on our way to LA. Naturally I took a swim in the ocean, fully clothed and rolled around in the sand so I would be in perfect condition to jump back in the car after.
Ben’s other favourite thing to do, besides go to the beach, is eat delicious food. So we introduced him to the Donut Bar.
You know it’s an excellent eatery when the donuts are bigger than your face.
After he enjoyed the donuts so much, we knew he would enjoy the ice cream sandwiches at The Baked Bear.
Yes that’s right, most people go for cookies to sandwich their ice cream, but not Ben! He sandwiched his ice cream with more donuts!
We also took him down to the Cabrillo Tide Pools, but first stopped off for our last gluttonous treat (for the time being): ginormous cinnamon buns.
Then we had so much energy from all of our sugar, we took a Harrison style hike. That means you go everywhere!
And explore every little thing that you come across. Oh, a dead lobster. Lovely!
Ben and Mama were too scaredy to hang out on the cliff edges like my Dada and me.
I got the distinct impression that Ben, despite his lack of cliff diving, was a party animal, so when July 4th rolled around, we took him out to party.
He decked himself out in as much red, white and blue as he could muster and we headed to my buddy’s house.
I spent most of the party riding the mini Thomas roller coaster they have in the garden.
After we’d finished our San Diego adventures with Ben, we were apparently headed up to a place called Los Angeles.
The first evening we headed to Griffith Park for another one of my hikes.
I demonstrated my climbing skills when I found and exposed tree roots. Let me tell you, the amount of little boys staring at me in awe as they walked past... Well, it was off the charts. If you can dream it, you can do it, guys!
Next we found a slide made of cement. How awesome is that? You’re even allowed to paint on it!
The next day we headed to Universal Studios! Mainly for Harry Potter World, but I’ve already told you guys all about that. So here’s what we did the rest of the day.
I practiced my acting expressions while we did the Studio Tour. I was hoping one of the directors would notice me, but I haven’t had any calls yet. On this tour, we rode a tram through all of the movie and TV sets. Seems calm you might think. But we also got attacked by King Kong and got caught in a torrential rain storm and flash flood! Not to mention the earthquake in the underground train station. Whoa.
Then the day took a turn for the worst. Zombies everywhere!!!!! I decided to stay out of my hospital, in the safe, while the others went to fight the zombies inside.
There was also a velociraptor on the loose! They managed to catch him and chain him up, thankfully. I thought he was going to eat me!!!
The next morning - Ben’s final day! - we took him to the best pancake place in the whole entire world. The Griddle Cafe! Let this day be known forever as, the day Ben could only eat half a pancake. He was defeated by deliciousness.
After this epic breakfast, we took a casual walk down Rodeo Drive. We didn’t try to go in any of the shops, as we looked a little too shabby for anyone to think we could afford million dollar diamond rings. But it was a good way to walk off a small amount of pancake.
Everyone was rushing around our Airbnb and I was pretty confused. It was 6am - this is my quiet iPad time where all the grown ups stay in bed. What was happening?
6:30am and I’m being ushered out of the house and into the car - making a quick pitstop to ride the excavator that had been left unattended outside.
A quick trip in the car to Starbucks meant I was eating a cup of whipped cream for breakfast when we arrived at HARRY POTTER WORLD! So this was what all of the early morning fuss was about!
We were so prompt and arrived at the entrance to Hogsmeade at 7am, but there was a power cut! I would have thought it was all powered by magic and candle light but... Anyway after an hour of making it clear that none of us were going to leave and go anywhere else in the park, they finally let us in! Even though we couldn’t go on the rides straight away, we took a walk through Hogwarts castle. In the photo above, I’m closely examining the House Points. Gryffindor was winning!
We wandered through the herbology labs and narrowly avoided the screaming mandrakes, through the Gryffindor common room (where Harry, Ron and Hermione was sneaking around under their invisibility cloak) and then we found Dumbledore! His office was full of interesting things, including a dragon skeleton!
All of the portraits in the castle were talking to us as we walked past. Well, they weren’t really talking to US, but seemed to be having arguments with each other! Especially the ones of Salazar Slytherin, Rowena Ravenclaw, Helga Hufflepuff and Godric Gryffindor.
After we’d been in the castle (and the parental units and Ben went on some sort of ride where dementors chased them), we headed to Ollivander’s wand shop. Ollivander himself was there to help somebody choose their wand! Or let the wand choose them, I should say. My Ma really really wanted to be picked by him, but he chose some other woman who didn’t even say the spells correctly! It’s wingardium leviosa not wingardium levioso.
Anyway, I decided that was the perfect moment to announce to the quiet room, “I’m a baby meercat!” Everyone turned and stared at me... Ollivander pointed his wand at me and commanded, “Silenco!” After that, my lips were glued together!
We walked through Hogsmeade after that, exploring all of the shops and taverns.
I suggested stopping in at the Hogshead or The Three Broomsticks for a fire whiskey but they said 9am was too early for hard liquor?
I was pretty overwhelmed by the selection of colourful candy in Honeydukes and the jokes in Zonko’s were really funny. But I was shocked to hear Moaning Myrtle in the bathroom when I was doing my business. A little privacy please!
There were lots of wizards and witches in muggle clothing, I kept seeing them waving their wands and making things in the shop window’s levitate. The girl above made a quaffle fly out of the box!
And even though it was summer, the whole village was covered with snow!
I eventually bought some high heeled shoes and convinced the wizards I was tall enough to ride the rollercoaster! Well okay... they didn’t believe me but let me sit on the chair and pull my best scared but excited face.
Before we headed home, we saw a performance by the Frog Choir (I’m not sure I’m a fan of the Dance Like Hippogriff song) and then the Beauxbatons Academy of Magic girls and Durmstrang Institute boys put on a show for us like in the Goblet of Fire. The girls did a very pretty dance, but I really liked the boys as they kept banging sticks. I spent the rest of the evening trying to dance like them, think I pulled it off! I think with my new skills I could challenge Harry Potter to a wizarding duel, seeing as he stole my initials and everything.
It was a full moon, so we had to escape before night fell, when Professor Lupin would turn into a werewolf and the dementors came to hunt him down!
A few weekends ago, my Pa took me on my first ever camping trip. We headed up to the mountains with some other dada’s he works with. They had boys called Noah, Riley and Wesley, aka my camping BFFs.
Once we arrived, we got down to work. The dads wasted time doing something with the tents, putting them up or whatever, while me and the boys quickly started building a giant mountain of dirt and creating avalanches.
After our geography/science class had concluded we went on a hike. “Look, there’s a bear!!!” I yelled to everyone. I swear I had them convinced, I’m very persuasive. Their eyes were darting around the trees nervously as they exclaimed, “Nooo! I can’t see a bear!”
All of a sudden we were distracted from the ‘bear’ situation by a wild turkey running well, wildly passed us! Who’s have thought? Now we know where to have our Thanksgiving camping trip.
As we made our way our of the forest we came to a big giant massive meadow. And jackpot, there was a huge pile of rocks in the middle! Off I went. Lightning speed. I was going to get to the top before anyone else - I’m the king of the world!
On our walk back to the camp site we heard a strange knocking noise and saw a tree full of holes, stuffed with acorns! Luckily my Pa’s friends are all teacher so the science guy told us that it was a woodpecker. They use their beaks to peck holes in the trunks of trees and hide acorns in the holes. Kind of like squirrels!
Soon it was night time and that meant... Marshmallow time! I’ve never been allowed to play with fire before, so this was a real treat. I toasted the marshmallows on a stick until they were gooey. Then discarded them so I could get back into that fire. The others were eating them before toasting another. What a waste of fire play time!
In the morning, Pa and I played lots of games in the tent and ate candy for breakfast while we waited for the others to wake up. When they finally did wake up - Noah had a surprise for us. He brought his rocket launcher to play with! We took turns jumping on the button and watching it race high into the sky.
When we got home I slept for a long time in my Ma’s bed, without bathing first. You’re welcome.
Once upon a time there was a little boy called Harrison. He wanted to fly on a plane to Disneyland more than anything in the world. One day, his dream came true. He grabbed his Take Off flight shirt, and his Lightening McQueen race car suitcase and off he went.
When Harrison arrived at Disneyland he quickly took to the streets to explore. He found a steam train and watched in awe as the train workers polished it before it began hard day’s work. Then off he went to take a journey through the Caribbean with his pirate friends. His first Disneyland ride! He enjoyed it so much, and the fact that there was no line, that he rode it twice in a row.
He took his whole family on the Winnie the Pooh ride, which took them through Pooh’s dreams of heffalumps and honey pots. It seemed as though Pooh was on LSD.
Harrison continued on his adventure, riding Dumbo through the park until he found a door. He crept up and knocked - was anybody there? Peter Pan? Is this the door to Neverland?
They boarded Captain Hook’s boat (which, at the time was overthrown by Peter), Tinkerbell coated them in pixie dust and they prepared their happy thoughts. Off they flew through London before taking the second right and flying straight until morning. After getting up to no good with the Lost Boys, Harrison took Mr Toad’s London car back to Disneyland where he invited his family to ride the circus train with him.
Before long, the sandman had visited and it was almost time to call it a night. But first the parades! Harrison boarded his father’s shoulders and watched Ariel swim past with Flounder and Sebastian, and King Triton light up the night with his trident. Elsa, Anna and Olaf floated by singing atop a Frozen ice palace, while Woody and Buzz waved hello to Grandpa Bruce. Tinkerbell flew through the castle before Rapunzel made her appearance singing I See The Light before setting off a few fireworks, bringing Harrison’s day, and his eyelids, to a close.
Even though Harrison’s wonderful Disneyland adventure had ended, he lived his final chapter at the Disneyland hotel the following day. Swimming in the pool, sliding down the monorail slide, buying all of the Lego at Downtown Disney and driving Grandma around in Roger Rabbit’s car.
Next stop was San Francisco, but we took a detour to the Redwoods because they are Uncle Tom’s favourite tree (mine is a palm tree and then a Christmas tree).
It was really fun running through the woods, playing on trees, climbing over barriers and exploring, while doing silly poses at the same time.
I even found a huge giant tree I could hide INSIDE! Of course this involved climbing over a do not enter fence. Don’t tell!
I wanted to climb on all of the trees and swim in the river but I couldn’t jump all of these pesky barriers without being noticed! I started to get a little tired towards the end of the walk (don’t tell anyone) but luckily I could hitch a ride on my Pa’s shoulders.
After this we headed on down to San Francisco. As soon as we saw the Golden Gate Bridge, I knew what we had to do. Guys, you need to bike me across this thing.
It was a nice gentle (well, strenuous and uphill for those pedaling the bikes) ride up to the bridge, around the San Francisco Bay. Once we started over the bridge though, oh my was it noisy! The wind alone deafened me. But I did get the witness all the different modes of transport crossing the bridge - buses, trams, trolleys, trucks - which I’m going to boldly state is going to remain a life highlight forever.
After we’d biked the bridge - we ended up in a little town called Sausalito. This town was lovely! The sole reason behind my judgement is the ice cream. While they didn’t do pistachio flavour (why? WHY?) my strawberry was just delicious. And was well-earned considering all the eight miles I’d just cycled/used up all my energy trying to sit still while they took their sweet time.
The next day was the day I’d been fearing. I was sent to prison. But it turns out it was pretty easy to escape - the doors weren’t locked and found a phone to call for rescue. Easy peasy! Don’t know what Al Capone was whining about.
After we’d evaded capture, we headed down to Pier 39 to see the sea lions and then to Bubba Gump Shrimp for dinner. Yum! As usual, Uncle Tom and Pa over-ordered. When will they learn?
After three whole nights here, we were off again. Last stop - DISNEYLAND!
The next morning we jumped into the car and drove for AGES to somewhere called Santa Barbara. I got a huge giant massive pistachio ice cream and we walked down the beach and around the beach. So much fun!
Oh, but then we had to get back into the car. I’m beginning to understand the meaning of the phrase “Road Trip” now.
Our next stop was Pismo Beach. We checked into our hotel (they all have two beds in the room, it’s hilarious!) and went for a walk along the beach.
On the beach we found tide pools! My favourite! We had lots of fun finding crabs and poking anemones. We even convinced Uncle Tom to pluck up the courage to touch one. He yelped rather loudly when it almost ate his hand (or so he said).
We attempted to eat dinner outside that night but even wearing all of our clothes we brought, it was too cold! I was not used to this. The waiters clearly thought we were crazy anyway, so let us move inside when we couldn’t handle it anymore. The following morning, we were back in the car! Today we had our longest drive... Oh boy! We drove through somewhere called Big Sur, which I’m told is beautiful. I’m three though, so I was much more interested in watching the trucks passing me by and trying to spot train tracks. We even saw a couple of freight trains - what excitement!
Our first stop on the drive was Nepenthe! The highlight was spotting some hawks or condors flying around above us. The others said something about beautiful views, good food and cocktails...
Our final destination for the evening was Monterey Bay. When we arrived into our rooms with two beds I unpacked my Lightning McQueen suitcase straight away. I had really important stuff in there. My Lego. My Cars cars. My books. I would have had more toys but I unpacked all of my monster trucks before we left the house and Ma didn’t notice. Talk about a parenting fail!
We had a nice walk around the harbor before dinner, and saw an otter swimming in the water! Then it was time for goodnight. So many late nights! Where would we be going tomorrow?
While I thought moving to California was my Californian Adventure, it turned out that it was just one of many. My grandparents and Uncle Tom came to visit again, but almost as soon as they arrived, we were off!
First stop: Los Angeles
After five minutes in the car I grew anxious, how much longer were we going to be sitting here? Where were we going? Were we going to Disneyland? How far away was Disneyland? What was Los Angeles? What was a road trip? All of these thoughts were swirling around my head so fast I couldn’t possibly articulate them. “I want the iPad.” That’s what came out instead. Well, I knew I wasn’t going to get a straight answer from this bunch of grown ups, so I enjoyed the next best thing - fire truck games.
When we arrived in LA, we stopped off at a shopping center with a tram in the middle of it. What a place!
There was this strange but wondrous shop called The American Girl Store. It sold the doll things girls like, along with matching outfits for the girl, and had a cafe to take your doll and a hair salon to take your doll to get their hair styled. It was pretty cool but Uncle Tom, Grandpa and Dada seemed really uneasy and left. So we reluctantly followed.
Next we went to Santa Monica Pier, where I enjoyed a free run on the beach. Thoroughly enjoying myself, I was oh too quickly swept away as our parking was running out of time. Why was that my problem? I’m old enough to stay here by myself guys!
The following day Ma went with Uncle Tom and Grandma to visit a person called Hollywood. They’ve called a few times wanting me to come live with them, and star in some movies and have my own TV show, but I had to turn Hollywood down. I’m WAY too busy. My buddy and I are obviously still famous enough to have a star there, apparently.
We also had breakfast at this place that served humungous gigantic massive pancakes. I looked on in disgust when everyone over indulged. I sipped on my milk pretentiously.
In the evening we went to a place called Griffith Park, which was really exciting because I got to do one of my favorite things - go hiking! We arrived at sunset, and after the sun went down we quickly found the trails.
Ma and I were so far ahead of everyone, we kept having to wait. But we enjoyed the beautiful views of the mountains, and Los Angeles. HA! No. I really enjoyed finding rocks and kicking dirt. Duh.
Before I knew it, it was time to get back in the car and drive to our next destination... Pismo Beach!
I’ve been informed that I will soon be visiting a magical place called ‘Disneyland’. At first I was non-plussed, because I had no idea what they were talking about. But then after I was shown clips on YouTube and told that there would be roller coasters and a monorail - shut the front door! On our way out that is. Let’s go!
It was at this point I was then informed we were going in three weeks. What’s three weeks? I thought to myself. I’ll ignore that and carry on.
Monday 5AM: Let’s go to Disneyland!!!!
Apparently we weren’t going that day. Why? Well we didn’t have tickets. They were arriving in the mail.
A MAIL TRUCK!!!!! They were delivering our tickets. So tomorrow it is then.
Tuesday 5AM: We’re going to DISNEYLAND!!!!
This was not the case. We were going to gymnastics. But I insisted upon Disneyland. I saw the tickets arrive. We have to wait for Uncle Tom, Grandma and Grandpa to arrive? Okay then! Let’s head to the airport! Wait. Wait! This isn’t the way to the airport.
Wednesday 5AM: It’s time for..... DISNEYLAND!!!!
No. NO. I do NOT want to go to the park. I NEED THE MONORAIL.
What was happening?! I was so mad that I took a time out to think about my history with Disney. I thought my love affair started when I was nine months old and Frozen came out. It was a staple daily viewing for two years! It had magical powers, I heard my Ma say. The only thing I’d watch!
But in reality, my connection with Disney started when I was born... It seems I have been dressing up like the characters and re-enacting iconic scenes all my life!
101 Dalmations
The Lion King
The Little Mermaid
Lady and the Tramp
Brother Bear
Winnie the Pooh/Tigger - this one has lasted a while...
But of course it’s not just Disney, I thoroughly enjoyed it when I was 10 weeks old and went for a vacation to my good friend Kati’s house and MET ELMO!!! She had arranged a sleepover for us, what a gal!
Well this has given me much to ponder. Has three weeks passed yet? Are we going to Disneyland now?
Incase you didn’t know, I have a big birthday coming up. I’m entering my threens. Have you heard? Orange is the new Black and Threenagerhood is the new Terrible Twos.
This is how I plan to handle my new role.
1. Independence.
When I turn three, I am going to start insisting on doing everything ‘by myself’. Of course, I don’t mean the unimportant things in life like dressing myself, peeing in the toilet, or cleaning up toys. I’m talking about the vital aspects of life - climbing in and out of the car (don’t even think about touching me), buckling my car seat (it’s very tricky and yes I will scream in frustration, but again, don’t you dare do it for me), packing my backpack full of monster trucks that I won’t be sharing, and I will most definitely not be holding anybody’s hand when I cross the street.
2. Living each day to the fullest.
This means I will not have the time or patience to be sitting around in the car while my mother sits in traffic. I will not be happy if we are held up by red lights. So I will be making it clear that, ‘I NEED TO MOVE!!!’ Same applies to any other shoppers when I’m in Trader Joe’s, you will get run down if you are in my path. That or I’ll stop obnoxiously close behind you, and start shrieking until you step aside.
3. Knowing myself
I’ve spent three years getting to know myself. I love transportation and I love my friends. So everyday I will be requesting to ride a train with my friends, preferably to get an ice cream or donut. I also know that I love the colour green the best, and therefore when grocery shopping, I will only let a cashier dressed in green serve me. My favourite singer is, unexpectedly, Carrie Underwood, and in the house and car I will only tolerate her music. It must be played loudly. There will be trouble if you try to mix it up with Taylor Swift. You don’t want to witness that.
4. Pay attention
No, not me. You. To me. Every second of the 13 straight hours I am awake. If you do not do this, I will be forced to physically grab your face and turn your head an inch from mine so you will have no choice but to acknowledge me, and listen to me. You will play trains, in exactly the way I want you too. You can’t just take any train, on any track. I will be very specific with my needs. You really must focus 100% on my instructions.
5. Turn up the sass
I have learnt some wonderful phrases in my life (the best are from my bud Mason’s Mama), ‘Are you kidding me? Are you serious?’ These are great when an adult asks you to do something, regardless of whether or not you want to do said task. Or just reading me a book I simply do not want to listen to. ‘Stop talking. Stop talking. Right. Now.’ Or whoopsie, I peed on the floor again. Don’t apologise. Apologies are for the weak. Use a very loud voice, but calm and collected and demand, ‘Clean it up, Mama!’
2016 is really flying by! I haven’t had a moment to myself to tell you about my Christmas. It was quite the adventure. I had my Grandma Kitty in my house, she took a jumbo jet and flew over the ocean! And then a couple of days later I woke up and Uncle Rob was in my bed! So I guess he has magical teleporting skills.
I was so excited to show them all the Christmas in San Diego. It was only a few days until Christmas was bringing all of my presents so I had to get busy.
There were numerous spots to see all the magic Christmas lights - we chose Balboa Park, Garrison Street and Coronado.
A video posted by Jennifer Patrick (@imjeej) on Dec 24, 2015 at 6:45pm PST
We took a bike ride through Balboa Park singing Jingle Bells at the top of our lungs. Okay, that was just me. But I did it loud enough for us all. Spreading Christmas joy for all to hear! We saw The Grinch’s pink Christmas tree - luckily The Grinch wasn’t there to steal everyone’s Christmas spirit.
My Ma had the bright idea to go to Julian, and for a walk at the lake on the way. I thought it was wonderful, but Pa and G-Ma had to wimp out. The weather one hour inland wasn’t anything like the San Diego coast.
We could barely see because the fog; the wind was so strong I’m surprised I didn’t blow away with the swirling clouds; and it was wet and muddy everywhere. So ideal conditions for a walk, in my opinion! That’s why I packed spare boots and clothes - the others should really take a leaf out of my book. I’m such a good example.
Uncle Rob and Ma came with me on my adventure hike. We almost lost each other in the mist and corn fields, but much to my dismay, they kept finding me.
Afterwards we headed to Pie Town. Highlights here involved Grandma buying me a mini truck filled with candy and drinking Pa’s Dr Pepper.
And just like that, CHRISTMAS WAS HERE!!!
I woke up and Christmas had left me stocking full of presents - my first gift? A chocolate dump truck. Thanks Christmas, for my breakfast. I still talk about that a whole two months later. What a wonderful gift!
When I went downstairs, I was going about my business of getting my toys out of my drawers, when I heard Uncle Rob laughing. At me! What? What did I do? I know I’m hilarious, but I hadn’t told a joke. Turns out Christmas had left so many presents for me under the Christmas tree, too! In my haste to stick to my routine of getting my monster trucks out, I hadn’t even noticed. Silly Harrison. I immediately got to work.
I must’ve been at the top of the nice list because I got every single thing I wanted, and more! My Lego construction site was at the top of my list - and Pa set to work on his engineering task of building it all for me to knock down with my new wrecking ball.
And then there was my scooter! Uncle Rob decided to gift me SPEED. Let’s go! It was a bit trickier than my bike, especially when I encountered a ‘steeeeeep hill!’ However, I’ve been persevering and I’m getting much faster.
They did try to make me sit down for Christmas dinner, but I politely declined. Way to try and ruin a fantastic day guys.
The next morning I came downstairs and was quite perturbed to see that Christmas was not here again. There wasn’t a single present under the tree! Excuse my language, but WTF?
Luckily the fun was still continuing. Just without presents.
We hiked around Torrey Pines Park - beautiful in the winter sun.
I kept having to show them the way.
And stop for squeezys. It was hard work being the navigator.
But my plan worked and I managed to lead the way down to the beach! I was really good, and didn’t get too soaking wet this time.
Grandma and I took a quick power nap at the end, to regain our energy for more adventures.
I had so much fun with Uncle Rob, he is my kind of guy. Look! He pushes me all the way upside down on the swings!
And he really enjoyed me pointing out the Von’s trucks to him.
So I was really sad when we went to the airport and he boarded the jumbo jet. Sad, and incredibly jealous. Where was my jumbo jet ride?
After he left I had to keep Grandma Kitty busy so she wouldn’t be sad, so I took her out for ice cream. The Baked Bear in Pacific Beach. If you haven’t, get your butt down there, STAT! Not only do you get ice cream, but cookies too! What the what!
We took a bike ride down the boardwalk, which obviously after two minutes turned into me ditching my bike and running into the ocean fully dressed.
Then I tripped over and got covered in sand as well as water. Can somebody help a guy out? Can I wipe this off on your shirt please?
I stripped down and flashed everyone my cheekiest grin. Guess we’ll have to stop off home before the airport to get lil ole me some new clothes!
And there we were again. At the airport! It was a little unnerving, everyone disappearing! When would I see them again? It’s come to my attention that I need to purchase my own private jet. I will start counting my pennies.
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