the grand optimist;

all of this stuff is tba tho.

[audreysprice]

I’m actually not paid overtime to work the hours that I do, but regardless I’m not complaining. I love my work, I’m just exhausted.

[harrisonlcorden]

And yet, you’re paid more than millions of people in this city, aren’t you?

Coffee and Redbull. You’ll be buzzed for days.

[pipescorden]

As much as I love the city, it’s that time of the year where all I’m thinking about is being on a beach somewhere, sunbathing and drinking margaritas. And instead I’m sitting in a stuffy waiting room for an audition. I think I need a vacation, stat.

[harrisonlcorden]

You didn’t tell me you had an audition. What’s the part?

[audreysprice]

I think it may be time to move my bed into my office because for the past two months, it’s become my home. That’s what the election season will do to you.

[harrisonlcorden]

Oh? Are we supposed to complain about actually doing the job we’re paid for?

[pipescorden]

You tell me. When you give me my present.

[harrisonlcorden]

I already told you the present is off the table. 

Maybe I’ll give it to Camilla to finally shut her up.

[pipescorden]

At least six. You can’t keep this up, Harr. It’s not good for you.

[harrisonlcorden]

I’m fine. Just because I don’t need thirteen hours of beauty rest like someone else we know, it doesn’t mean I’m not managing. 

[camilla-montgomery]

Yet another reason we were never meant to last. And yet here we are still talking to each other. Can’t get enough of me, can you?

[harrisonlcorden]

You’re right. It’s high time I admit that I’m still hung up on you.

[camilla-montgomery]

You may think I’m a lot of things, but I’d seriously hope untrustworthy isn’t one of them.

[harrisonlcorden]

Not in the plain meaning of the word, no.

[pipescorden]

Yeah, but you wouldn’t do that to me.

[harrisonlcorden]

Oh? And what is that you believe makes you so special?

[pipescorden]

When’s the last time you slept? For a decent amount of time.

[harrisonlcorden]

What do you consider decent? Four hours? Five? Two nights ago.

[camilla-montgomery]

I’m childish? I’m not the only one who’s not backing down here.

[harrisonlcorden]

So why don’t you call check-mate and give up? I’ll even do you a solid and call you the bigger person for once.

Oh sorry, I forgot. You’re the one other person with a compulsion to get the last word in that rivals mine. Stalemate. 

[camilla-montgomery]

Maybe. Tell me about it and we’ll see.

[harrisonlcorden]

You know, I haven’t even told my sister about this book. What makes you think I’d trust you?

[camilla-montgomery]

Fair enough. Working on the new great American novel?

[harrisonlcorden]

Are you genuinely interested?

[camilla-montgomery]

And I wouldn’t want you to. Even if we were dating. What’s the winner’s prize? Though I guess not talking to each other anymore would be prize enough.

[harrisonlcorden]

Ah, the sweet sound of silence. Remember this moment, because I certainly will. I’ll hold you to it next time you decide to act like a child.

[pipescorden]

I don’t get it. What are you trying to say?

[harrisonlcorden]

I don’t know anymore. I’m tired.

[pipescorden]

Harassment? It’s all in good fun, little brother.

Now that’s just rude. You wouldn’t withhold a surprise just because of a little teasing, would you?

[harrisonlcorden]

Have you met me? Of course I would.

[pipescorden]

I’m so lucky to be older than you then. But even then, you’d have nothing on me.

It’s so fun to watch them mess with you, though. Teenage girls are great like that.

[harrisonlcorden]

It’s a wonder I put with this flagrant harassment. And to think, I was going to come over tonight surprise you with something I found for you downtown. Now you’ll have to work for it. 

[pipescorden]

There so aren’t patterns. Other than hot and ultimately not so nice.

[harrisonlcorden]

I beg to differ. Not on the “not so nice,” stipulation, but on everything else. Think about it for a little while and then get back to me. You might surprise yourself.