for so long ༻꧂
part 2 >< kissing
5k dbf!neighbor!joel x fem!reader
𓆉 series master list 𓆉 main master list 𓆉
𓆉 series playlist 𓆉
warnings: [NO OUTBREAK], another woman, angst, alcohol consumption, v fingering, age gap (joel 47 reader 24) dbf!joel, dom!joel, mentions of death; grief etc. , heavy petting, clit play,
authors note: my classes start next week and i’m petrified. not having a set time to write will kill me, but i will make time! dbf!joel is so special to me and i need to finish upper east side. feel free to submit any ideas or thoughts you have for the series that you think i should include 🍊🍊🍊 gift to you all since it’s friday ;)
(and now as i want to write dbf joel now i’m thinking of doing a javier and oberyn fic oml i need to finish something first)
as always, comments and feedback is always always welcomed 𓇼
word count: 5K
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟
Salting, flavor 𖦹 Lies like a sailor
But he loves like a painter 𖦹 Billions
Psycho, priceless 𖦹 Good in a crisis
Working the angles 𖦹 Billions
𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟
You forced yourself to get up and leave that dock, leaving behind your incident with Joel. You understood why he left, but at least you got what you had of him for that time. You chugged the last of the nasty beer, walking slowly off the dock to your house.
The party was still going on, but you didn’t want anyone to see you. Eyes bloodshot from being awake for so long, you thought you’d pass out immediately if you had to talk to anyone else. Detouring behind trees, you wind out to the front of the house again, entering the code to the garage. The music was loud and you felt bad for ditching your own welcome home party, but you would make it up to James and your dad.
You snuck into the kitchen for food without anyone seeing you, praying that Joel wouldn’t see you, or better off if they already left to go home.
Just in time as you're hauling the food upstairs, and the moment you realize you need your stuff from your dads car, you can hear Joel talking to someone. Not Tommy, Sarah or your dad. Another woman.
Backing down a few steps carefully so you don’t get caught in the line of sight, his back is turned against you, thankfully.
And this hag touching the collar of Joel’s shirt.
“We could host a fourth of July party together Joel, it would be fun.” She moves to his ear.
He backs up a little against the railing, looking to the side.
“Mary, you know how I feel about this.”
This.
“What Joel? We kissed one time, and then you were the one that took things further. You can’t blame me for wanting more.”
You see that he stays stagnant, he doesn’t even twitch with her there so close to him. She moves down his chest.
Not giving a fuck, you place the food at the top of the stairs, delicately walking back down to interupt their little frisk to go to your dad’s truck.
Trying not to wince when you see her kissing his cheek, the sexual desire making you almost puke. Bealining to open the front door,
“Honey, where are you going?”
Caught.
The last thing you wanted to talk to was these two. And you were so tired. At this point you were so sleep deprived talking still made sense, but everything said to you would slip pass and not register. You looked high, from your eyes being bloodshot, and your body was aching to just lay down in silence. Almost enjoying the misery of being so tired.
When you were tired, it was easy to get aggravated, your face would minisculely show if you were annoyed or pissed but now you had to do a straight face.
Turning around, the hairs on your back stand up right, swallowing.
Now you know, this was Mary Anne.
Your dad would always complain about this woman on the phone. The description he gave you matched perfectly and the tone of her voice sounded like high pitch nails clinging against each other.
Avoiding Joel, with obvious lipstick marks all over his face, they separated from each other when you turned around.
“You must be Mary Anne, my dad has talked about you quite a lot.” You smile, not once looking at Joel.
“Your father is too sweet, he’s really happy to have you back.”
“I’m happy to be back too, the town has expanded a lot.”
“Well thank Joel here, he and his brother have done all of that!” She pats his chest, nothing but disgust shingles through your head.
One minute he’s out with you, almost giving your heart to him. And here he is, being a fucking typical man.
You smile and nod at Joel, grabbing the door being you.
“James has missed you too, he talks about you all the time at baseball practice.”
Making eye contact, “I forgot you’re an assistant coach, that must be fun.”
Of course she was, it was just fucking weird at this point.
“Yeah, coaching the boys for the summer has been fun, I drive James home when your dad is stuck at the restaurant, I live just down the street so if you need anything let me know.”
You feel like your eyes unfocus and you’re just staring at this woman, just begging your body to leave.
“And I’m so sorry for your-” Here it comes. “Loss, James talks about your mama sometimes and I can imagine she was an incredible person.”
In your head, you shake your head and fucking scream, but now you freeze and stare at her.
You do let your mouth hang open, sucking in fire for air. Not in an upset way, but almost faking a yawn. It was childlike, but to them you felt small.
Joel is still, just fucking standing there and you know he’s looking at you out of pity.
“Mhm, thank you Mary Anne, I’m so sorry, I’m really tired and I was just going to grab my stuff out of my dad's truck.”
“Aww that’s okay honey, we're just about to leave too.” She laughs up at Joel.
Scoffing, you open the door and silently scream, and when you do leave the house you’re falling, falling to the ground.
Fucking perfect.
Mary Anne gasps and she tells Joel to get your father, instead he comes to you.
“Jason! Jason she fell, get out here!” She yells.
Thinking you’re okay, you try to get up, but no way in hell does that work when you fall straight down again.
You hear everyone rushing out to the porch and suddenly Joel’s strong hands grab your body.
“Don’t touch me. Let go.” You seethe under your breath.
You don’t care that you gave him a nasty look, he deserved it. But he backed off as you wished.
“Bear?” Your dad rushes out, “I told you we had no front steps right now.”
Eyes still adjusting to the darkness, sleep is all you need.
“Right.” You chuckle, “I forgot, sorry.” Everyone laughs, filing back inside to the party.
Standing up, putting your weight on your good leg, you hobble over to grab your duffle bags.
Throwing them onto the porch and crawling to stand on top of the wood, people were watching you but you didn’t give a fuck, you’d do it on your own.
“Dad, I'm going to sleep.”
He stands there, looking into your pearled eyes.
“Okay, see you in the morning.” He hugs you.
Joel and Mary Anne are still there at the bottom of the stairs.
“Have a good night.” Letting your eyes crinkle in the smile.
“Feel better honey!” She calls after you as you stumble up.
Joel watches you walks pass them. You’d spit on his shoes if you could.
Peering to the top step, the food is still there, thank god.
Not embarrassed as you thought, but that happening in front of Joel was a smack from hell. Opening your door, turning on the light to your childhood room. Nothing has changed. The smell, the pictures and paint, your bed, all the same.
𓆉
Someone’s jumping on your bed. Eyes opening up, sun filling the room, James is shaking you awake.
“It’s noon! Wake up!” He says.
You groan, “James it’s saturday…”
“And it’s your real first day here and I want to spend it with you!”
“Okay… where’s dad?”
“He’s at the restaurant. He told me to ask you if you could close tonight so he can come get me from my scrimmage practice.”
“Jason wants me to work..” You pout, truly you were fine with it. It’s the family business and you had nothing better to do, but on a saturday night…
“Ok, how about we spend the day together and I’ll drive you to practice in dads other car, and I’ll go to the damned restaurant. Deal?” You confirm.
“Perfect.” He giggles.
“Do you want to go surfing?”
“Let's do that tomorrow. I have my game and then there's that team bonfire thing dad told you about, surf then?”
“It’s tomorrow? That’s perfect James. I cant wait to watch you play.”
He grins, “Dad left some cash for us to go eat, I want Ihop.”
“Ihop.” You mock. “You really want IHop?”
“Yes”.
“Fine.”
You get out of bed and James stays.
“How’s your leg?”
“Fine.” You mumble.
“I saw Mary Anne trying to bud in per usual.”
You respond immediately, “Is that awkward, her being your coach…”
“Thank god you think that, I swear she thinks she’s my new mom and then did you see her all over Joel! Sarah was disgusted.”
“Yeah I was too, yuck.” Putting a finger in your mouth. “Trust me I knew who she was when I saw her, dad told me all about the annoying lady that clings to all the single men in town.”
“She’s been all over Joel for so long it’s annoying, if she becomes Sarah’s step mom I’m making her move in with us, sorry.”
Sarah’s step mom. You shiver.
“Sarah… hmm James, do you like her?” You stare him down as you brush your hair.
“I’ll be honest I don’t know… there's days where I think she likes me back but then some days it feels like we’ll only be friends.” He explains.
“You won’t know until you ask, but at least you’re friends.” You offer. “Ask her to come to breakfast with us, it wouldn't hurt.”
“You're the best.” He shrieks and runs to grab his phone.
𓆉
After having breakfast with Sarah and your brother, which seemed completely normal between them both. Sarah wanted to go to James practice, you dropped them both off and before you had to go to the restaurant you went to the towns public beach.
You sat there watching people, headphones in. There were some hot, hot men.
You called Lexie, updated her about your first day and told her about Joel.
“That hot dad, why didn’t you kiss him?”
“I don’t know I was scared and I think he was too.” You look down at the sand.
“And he’s apparently with this old bitch, so show him up. Date around the town. Put yourself out there.” She edges on.
“I don’t know, maybe sometime soon, but I have to go to my dads restaurant to close, he said you can visit whenever. Joel has a hot brother…”
She laughs over the receiver, “Maybe after the fourth, and I’ll come spend a week. In August I start my new job at that aquatic life place I was telling you about.”
“That’s amazing Lex, let me know about after the fourth, we’ll have fun.”
“Okay, I love you, Ciao!”
You never thought about it in terms but you didn’t want to work at your dad’s restaurant forever, you didn’t want your degrees to go to waste.
You’d start job hunting soon, but you needed to give yourself some time. It was weird being in the same town you grew up in, reliving every childhood memory. A little girl who would wake up happy, but now everything makes you feel like a ghost.
You wish you could silence it all, but here you are asking for answers.
𓆉
As you pull into the parking lot, it's dark and your dads truck is gone. You forgot you’d have to meet a whole new staff and it was packed. Or you could wait in the back the whole night and just lock the doors to the building when everyone’s gone.
Applying mascara and black honey, you get out of your car and walk in. People at the bar, people inside, people outside eating at on the lookout to the beach. Bussers and servers moving quickly.
Walking up to the hostess stand, a boy that looks your age sits in a chair sideways, chewing gum with his mouth open and he has a 2012 Justin Bieber hair cut.
“Yo, sit yourself inside or out, server will get to you afterwards.” He says, still scrolling on his phone
“Ummm, I’m uhhh.” Trying to get his attention, “Jason’s daughter, he wanted me to close tonight.”
He sits up, falling out of his chair, then getting up again.
“Boss’s daughter.” He yelps, looking frightened and he scrambles to clean the counter.
The server nearby screams and chaos breaks loose.
“Uh no you guys don’t have to do that, I’m nothing, pretend I’m not even here.” You back into the corner and boot it behind the bar. People were looking at you and murmuring, and the bartender looks your way.
“Chet?” You ask.
“No fucking way, it’s really you, they said the boss’s daughter was coming in tonight and I wasn’t gonna believe it unless I saw it.”
You and Chet were friends when you were younger, you both liked to surf a lot when you were kids,but then you saw him less and less, nothing bad but time.
Time was all you had, but still lost.
“Sorry if we're more lax than other restaurants, your dad did choose to hire all 20 year olds.” He smirks.
You shrug, “It’s the beach life, what more do you expect?”
He made a few more drinks, you both talked through the night. You were happy he didn’t bring up your mom. You weren’t sure if he knew but it wasn’t worth bringing up.
Before he left a the end of his shift,
“Hang out this summer?” He looked into your eyes.
“I’d like that.”
Chet wasn’t too harsh on the eyes either. He was pretty, and always nice. You expected nothing less from him. His parents raised him right and you were so proud to know one of the good ones.
The whole staff left late, you got to talk to all of them, glad that your dad works with good people.
As everyone left, you were cleaning behind the bar and wiping cups, hearing the ding of the door cling alive.
“We close in ten minutes.” You yell above your head.
“I know.”
Your head pops up from the counter, and lo and behold Joel Miller.
“What are you doing here?” You stand up.
His hair looked electrocuted, his eyes bloodshot. His clothes were disheveled, but his fucking flannel still hugged his body. He still looks like the man you’ve known for so long.
“Wanted to see if you were okay…” He walks in.
“M’fine.” You swallow.
He takes a seat at the bar and you look into his eyes, he looks tired, and already drunk.
“You’re drunk.” You blink.
You wouldn’t let yourself be upset at this, but you were mad that you let yourself talk about your mom to Joel, and he was smothered in lipstick by another woman. It was the principle.
He tuts, “I am.”
“Then why are you here?” Throwing your hands to your side.
He gulps, “I don’t want to do this, I had a long day.”
“Mhmph okay, find we won’t do this.”
You clean more and he just stands there and watches you.
“If you want to stand and watch, maybe I can invite Mary Anne to join.” You look up.
“Don’t, don’t do that.” He puts his head in his hand.
“Then what the fuck do you want me to do…Joel. You’re here in my dad’s restaurant, go home.” You yell.
“I can’t… I can’t go home without speaking to you.”
“Then talk, it isn’t hard Joel.” You pause.
“You know this isn’t fair,” He starts, “I find out you’re coming to live with your dad and it’s like my whole life stops.” He mumbles.
“Do you want some more lipstick all over your face, or are you gonna cry about it?”
Calmly he walks behind the bar, not raising his voice.
“I messed up, I know that. But please…” He gets closer to you, “Don’t be mad at me.”
“Joel you were this close to my face 24 hours ago comforting me about my dead mom and you,” You put your finger on his chest, “You and this old bitch were in, now my house kissing. And you try to be the hero by asking if I’m okay last night with your faced smeared from another woman,” You shake your head, “Get the fuck out.” You say sternly.
He stands there shaking his head, he doesn’t move.
“What Joel?” You look into his eyes defeated.
“You don’t get it sweetheart, you are my best friend's daughter. If I did something to you, if I touch you, if we are caught, if I kiss you, if I even think about you. I am corrupting you.”
You stay silent, but you listen to him. Hanging by a thread, you would listen to him forever.
“If your father found out about us, do you know what he would do to me? What he would do to make us not see each other?” He swallows.
“Ever since I have known you, I have kept myself away from you. Mary Anne is nothing, I mean it.”
You watch his eyes gloss and his arms cross, he’s being genuine.
“I allowed myself to come in here tonight because you needed to know that, but I promise I’ll never go near her or you again, and as long you’re here I won’t-
You had to, you had to quiet him, standing on your toes you close in on his mouth. Kissing him, letting yourself touch him.
You moan into his mouth, something to quiet him.
He lets go, “No, don’t do this because you feel bad sweetheart.”
“Joel you can’t tell me what to do.” You capture his lips again, your nose’s brushing. His musk electrifies the burn in your body. “My dad will not find out about this, I am a grown woman, I choose what I want for my life.”
He closes his eyes, breathes and opens, his voice drops “Small town beach girl all grown up now?”
Your eyes widen, “Please, I wasn’t always studying, Joel. Fucking forced me to be better student.”
He blinks, “Close the fucking restaurant and meet me in my truck.”
You stand there, grinning. He walks away and you finish the closing tasks. Before you open the door to walk outside, preparing yourself. This is Joel Miller. You’ve wanted him the day you first met him.
Locking the door, you turn around and his truck is not in the parking lot, but near the trees on the sand a couple hundred feet away. The moon was illuminating the water and you walked over.
You could see he was looking out the window, waiting for you. Restraining yourself from running to the passenger door, you make it, open the door and pull yourself in. No one could see you both in this spot, which was good.
“Hi.” You breathe, your heart was racing and when he looked over at you, the moonlight reflecting off his face and hair made you throb. Made you crave more in your life. He’s beautiful, you never needed anything more than him right now.
The feeling crashes over you too quickly, you move to sit in his lap and he kisses you. Matching your speed, all you can focus on is his mouth.
He grunts when you thread your fingers through his soft hair. You kiss his nose, mouth agape at how intoxicated this man has made you feel. It was new, you weren’t scared but you were so hyper aware of how he touched you. Lust consumed your brain.
You pop off from his lips, remembering that he was drunk, “Joel, you’re drunk.”
He licks his lips, “This,” He kisses you again, “Has sobered me up. I promise.”
His reassurance calmed your heart, but would he regret this?
He moved with you, you both moaned into each other, you both needed each other.
“Was she like this Joel? Was her pussy tight? Did she make you cum?” You question, shifting down to his neck and you suck until you can feel his breath stutter.
“Could her throat take your cock? Did she finish you off? Could she swallow your thick… oozing cum?” You lick a stripe on his neck, you can feel his stomach cave in. Reaching a hand down to his jeans, you palm him. His breath is shallow, music to your ears.
The windows are starting to fog up and you lean against his side window, staring at his dark honey eyes.
“How’d you fuck her Joel? Was she screaming your name all night?” You continue to rub the outline of his hard cock.
He stops you, with a shaky hand he grabs your jaw, in a low rough rasp, “You’re fucking filthy.” He slams his pouted lips to yours, letting him take you. He nips at your lip, touching under your tits. Beyond being sensitive, you take off your shirt inviting him for more.
“Bet she doesn't have tits like mine, does she?” You flaunt.
Your tits were bubbling out your bra, being a broke college student didn’t allot you to buy bras every time you grew a size.
Joel gave you confidence, his eyes were glued to what he saw, and it fucked with your brain, but you loved it.
“Sweetheart, fucking her was nothing. All she wanted was vanilla,” He licks the top of your boob, “She wanted nothing more than soft.”
“Joel Miller fucks rough?” You ask, raising a brow.
“When I fuck sweetheart, it’s hard… and long.” He extends his arms to your ass. “I like to take my time.”
You wince as his hand crawls up your back from your ass.
“She didn’t like that. She will never be you.” He carnally growls, “And I didn’t cum, she threw up on my dick.”
You bust out laughing, he follows. He must have a big fucking did then…
He felt so good against you. You could feel your swollen lips and your flushed cheeks. Sweat building on your hairline and neck.
You want to give him more, you want to feel more so you lean back against the steering wheel, going for the zipper to his jeans and he stops you, looking up.
“No, pretty girl hands off.” He huffs, “I want to make you feel good right now, that’s the least I owe you.” He draws out a kiss, “But that fucking mouth- gonna get you in trouble. Fucking brat. Mary Anne is gone, blocked. If I see her again, nothing. I promise.”
You shiver, “I’ve never been with a man…” He pushes your hair behind your ear, “That focuses just on me.”
“Then I’ll teach you, sweet girl.” He rubs circles on your cheeks.
“Those college boys don’t know how to fuck.” He hums, his hands crawl across your back, unhooking your bra and it falls off, he’s definitely not a college boy. He’s a man.
He adjusts again when he sees your tits, grunting. Immediately he lunges forward to your chest, taking a nipple in his mouth and a high-pitched whimper falls from your mouth. Your head rests above his, and you push him to your body.
His mouth takes your nipple, his tongue caressing each part, and your head swells. No man has ever focused on your boobs.
“So fucking perfect sweetheart. So soft.” He was sucking enough you knew you’d wake up with hickeys everywhere, but you knew that’s how it would feel real.
He pushes you a little further back, “Put your hands on the dashboard.”
You put your hands behind your back, giving space as your body lifts.
His golden hands circle your nipples, so sensitive you hiss. His hands reach your zipper now, and he stops.
“Are you okay with me touchin you?” He asks, with a hushed breath.
This was it, you weren’t in college anymore. You weren’t being fingered in your dorm room any more, you weren’t uncomfortable, you were with Joel. He asked you, he isn’t forcing you.
Nodding your head, “Yes.”
With your approval his eyes travel down, his fingers insistent on your zipper. He shimmies your jean shorts down your legs. Your left bare in your black underwear. Nothing special but, black underwear was the only thing you would buy.
“If you want to stop, we stop. Okay?” He gets your attention, you’re hazed by the fog. Breathing was starting to get hard and you couldn't believe Joel was about to finger you. Nobody but him.
You kiss him again, “Make me cum Joel, please.”
His left hand pulls your underwear to the side, revealing the mess you’ve created. You’ve been drenched since the bar.
You draw in a moan, the air and his breath on you made the hair on your back raise. You were scared he didn’t like what he saw, but now wasn’t the time to worry. You couldn’t give a fuck.
He fiddles his fingers between your pussy lips, drenching his hand with your liquid.
“Fuck, been drenched for me all night, huh? Been wanting this?” His southern accent was going to make you scream.
“I’ve wanted you forever Joel, please…” You beg.
He slowly brings his fingers to his face, putting them in his mouth.
He closes his eyes and groans.
“Like honey, you’re fuckin perfect sweetheart. M’fucking lucky.” He puts his fingers back on your pussy, up to your clit. Your jaw drops.
“That’s the spot. Mhhhm.” He rubs your nub furiously, holding on tight.
“Last night you looked so pretty, always so fucking pretty.” He says, “Those hazy eyes,” You smile, “You’re body,” He brings you closer, hand to cupping you, “This pussy.”
Beat. He takes a breath. Air thick.
“You are perfect, and I’ve wanted to tell you for so long. Now I know.”
Even if he didn’t mean it, even if he had said this to another woman, you didn’t care. His words drew out something filthy, something the rest of the world would ever understand about you.
With his right hand hand he holds your stomach down, he was touching the part you most nervous about. But he didn’t care about what you looked like, he didn’t care about or know what you thought of yourself. He kept touching you.
“I could survive on your pussy for the rest of my life. I mean that.” He murmurs.
Taken by shock, still holding you down. He maneuvers his fingers with your panties, sliding two fingers in. This was it.
You gasp, not realizing alone how thick two of his fingers were. “Oh my fucking- god… Joel.”
He doesn't stop. He keeps going, not letting up and you couldn’t tell the difference between anything anymore. It was just him.
“Feel good, pretty girl? So fucking tight.” He snarls. His thumb pushes the skin about your clit, rubbing it as he fingers you.
“Joel, faster. I don’t fucking care.” You scream.
He does as he’s told, curving them inside. You yelp, no man has ever gotten this point, never able to finger fucking you this good.
His other hand holding you down made it better. Strong enough to keep you down from a shaking. You could feel it brewing. A storm riling inside your cunt.
You swallow, he knows what hes doing and you are utterly fucked.
“Gonna cum over fingers, c’mon baby, I know you can do it, such a good girl.”
“Joel-”
“I know. Let go for me.”
Instantly the waves from the beach fills your ears and a piercing shriek splits through the car. You get so tight your walls push him out and you slump on top of Joel, catching your breath.
You couldn’t process, this was the most intimate you’ve ever been with a man, it felt like you were being sloppy to your morals. But you couldn’t resist Joel.
In his car, both risking this for each other. He came for you.
Since you met him, earlier in your college years, it felt like this was supposed to happen. And now it is.
You could feel him kisisng you chest, not letting go.
He opens the center concil, grabbing a kleenex and swiping your center clean of your slick. Rubbing the dull pain he just fucked out of you.
Amazed to watch him clean you up.
“What?” He asks.
“Nothing.” You shrug.
Just Joel Miller, cleaning your vagina up, after he gave you a lip biting orgasm.
“Bet those boys never cleaned you up, a shame.” He says.
He helps lift you to the passenger seat and he just stares at you.
“You’re beautiful, and I’ll say it a thousand times over.” Heart leaping, you couldn’t say anything. You gulp.
“When you get home you need to pee.” He pants.
“Trust me, I know.” You laugh, every window in the car was fogged up, and you drew his name on your side. Both watching a droplet fall.
“Gotta get you home or your dad will probably fucking panic.” He says.
You nod in agreement, as he pulls out, leaving the beach. He rolls down the windows to circulate the air. Your hair blows through the wind and you've never felt more alive, more safe.
You watch him as he drives, how calm he is with everything. His smile, the lines on his face, his nose. Beautiful. You could write about him. You wrote about everything, observed and took in every little piece of information, and you would do this for Joel.
Time has done him well.
“I know tonight was… short lived. There's so much more I want to say and do, but I promise-”
You rush a finger to his lips.
“Shhh, you don’t have to promise me anything. I know.” You grin.
As much as you wanted to do more tonight with him, you’re glad this was what was given to you. You’re glad he came to bar.
He drives up to his house. From next door you could see the lights are off but James and your dad are home. Unbuckling, you grab your phone and open the door.
He turns off the engine, and before you get out of the car he grabs your shirt, and kisses you hard.
“See you at the game and campfire tomorrow?”
You nod your head.
Softly you hum to yourself as you get out, walking briskly to the front of your porch and crawling on top to unlock the door. You look over to him before you go inside and he’s laughs at you.
What has Joel Miller done to you?

