the poetic expressions of a fellow human being

* I'm 19 and I write poems * she/her * ENFP *

[hashbraune]

The Deepest Ledge

I regret extending my hand into the mirror that day

7 years ago

When I was neither babe nor grown

And falling

Slowly

Faster

Speedier and speedier until my head spins endlessly

What did I do, WHO did this to me?

I'm just a kid, please, it's too soon!

Why am I in this...purgatory?

PLEASE SOMEONE

OUT THERE

HELP ME-

oh.

I landed.

In a room full of...more mirrors?

I stand to observe and realize.

They speak.

The slurry of words travels through the ground into my veins,

My core,

The very air I inhale.

Why are their words turning into daggers?

Why does this hurt?

And why do I....like it?

With each word,

A new chain forms.

Living metal,

Fortifying with every breath.

I stayed stuck here in this corner,

A corner of loveless comfort.

Until I saw it.

Light.

The mirrors then shattered.

I no longer saw the sobbing child,

But now, a rosebush.

And I climbed my way out

Out of the deepest ledge.

I'm free.

~ Amanda Britten (September 2023)

[hashbraune]

Pas de Deux

A void falls upon me I see no way out I run for hours, thirsty and exhausted There's no light at the end Is there any end to this? I call for my mother Her punch to my nose felt boiling hot I call for my father

His blade on my neck felt ice cold. I felt their hands In unison for the first time Pushing me down Extending one to help me up Only to push me again Until my chest is hollow And my throat is burnt from my screams.

Alas, one light remains A small Star in my vision

My guide, my hope I need out I want out Let me out, dear Star Take me to your Safety Embrace me in your warmth Or send someone to do so.

This tunnel pierces me Yet it provides pillow-like softness for my head I cry and beg, hoping someone hears me

But they're all gone, sucked into nothing And I'm alone.

~ Amanda Britten, 09/26/2023

[hashbraune]

Gonna add a new poem soon :)

[hashbraune]

Yay I'm 19 today :)

[hashbraune]

New poems do be brewin

[hashbraune]

soil

I am like soil;

life flourishes and blooms from my being.

But I can drown, too.

And who said that soil can't be destroyed?

~Amanda Britten, 07/02/2023

[hashbraune]

omg guys i'm a university student now

[hashbraune]

"My Beautiful Heartbreak"

Sitting beside you warms my heart quicker than a hot summer day.

There's something about your thin,

yet sturdy physique,

that causes my face to redden

and my tongue to trip.

Of all the wonders I've marveled at,

your existence captivates me

deeper than most.

Make me the one you'd hold in comfort,

and the one that earns the touch of your lips.

If I fit your interest, that is.

~Amanda Britten, 02/16/22

[hashbraune]

"Cycle"

Birth is viewed as nothing short of a wonder.

Death, on the other hand, brings forth sadness and grief.

In all this, I can't help but ponder;

does one result from the other?

Those slits on her wrist look identical

to the stretch marks that adorn her outer womb,

almost as if they are two lines connecting her life together.

While I debate my own consciousness regarding this matter,

I feel the rising burst of a conclusion.

One cannot exist without the other:

the cycle connecting both would then break.

Desire has tempted me in both directions;

to create new life, and end my own.

I still have time.

Time to continue the cycle.

~Amanda Britten, 03/09/2022