•all we had to do was touch• @hazebelit - Tumblr Blog

a normal human emotion ..... whatever next !

i think about the circumstances that shaped me into who i am. it would be a loaded question to ask if i would go back and change anything. i don’t have an answer. the little girl inside my ribcage screams and begs me to say yes, go back, change everything. but i quite like who i am if you look past the sinkhole in my chest.

i’ve grown to not notice it as much. so much, that people look at me strangely when i talk about the ache without even flinching, without so much as a flicker of distaste. this is just a part of me, just another day. i know nothing but earthquakes.

my hands shake when the fault line across my chest shifts and the tremors move throughout my body. and when the destruction hits, i disappear for awhile. this is the only noticeable sign of my demolition. it’s best to leave me alone when my body is being ravaged. just let it pass in peace. or else more people suffer.

i get so eerily silent for someone going through hell. but that’s only half the truth. inside, i am screaming so loudly i sometimes get headaches. and have no choice but to fall into the dirt and rot for awhile. i have always felt safer with dirt in my eyes. my hands are unrecognizable when they’re not stained with blood. i can’t be any other way.

who could love such a war torn being whose comfort is the battlefield? who could blame an armory for holding weapons? it’s the very thing it was made for. it’s the very thing this body was made for.

lone-pine-poetry