NOTHING SWEET ABOUT ME @hdxsohyun - Tumblr Blog

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고소현. Go So Hyun

#gs: face #{ just a small heads up i'm on a short hiatus ! ; u ; }

contact. absence. unlock. wanted. ; sohyun & yoongi

Sohyun knows that the delicate art of letting go is a complex process of learning, a diligent practice; something she prides herself on ever since she started creating art for her tattoo pieces. It's been something that therapy sessions drilled into her, something to fill the void of that phantom something that's been missing ever since she came clear.

However, it isn't as easy, - never was, - in fact there are still fragments of poison from her previous life (to her, it feels like she's been granted a second chance to live again) and he is still somehow a vivid part of it, up until now. Toxic, but remains addictive; she heaves a sigh as she digs through her phone to retrieve a few particular pictures she still stores.

The picture of her and Yoongi from their latest outing is replaced, albeit briefly - as if she wanted to revoke the feeling of his arms around her during one particular, lonely night. The next day is somewhat rushed and she forgets about it altogether; carelessly leaves the wallpaper there even as she arrives at the young Youtuber's apartment for coffee and beer.

Some people say that it calls for a bad omen to cling to the past, and Sohyun is bound to learn the hard way. It's as if her sudden longing served like warning to what's about to come afterwards;

She could've called Yoongi. Or wake up Sohee. Taehyun's number is in her phone, too. But she chose the comfort of her past relationship to counter loneliness, something she still hopes for, a longing inside that keeps screaming I love you. She's no longer in love with him though, - it's the idea of love they had that has her up all night sometimes.

"Why the hell are you bringing this up?" she asks sternly, hugging her knees and glaring from where she sits on Yoongi's bed; their little argument escalating far quicker than she could've ever anticipated.

"Why the fuck do you bring this up when I just asked you to get real for a second and talk to me about,..." Sohyun gestures, a little helplessly, "…about us?"

"When are you going to face the reality for once, Christ.. !

What is wrong with you?"

#gs: contact #hdxminyoongi #{ _(┐「ε:)_ }

[ ✉ ➝ 소현이 바보 ♡ ] wow [ ✉ ➝ 소현이 바보 ♡ ] i make you food on the daily and ur gonna call me out to taehyun on not getting you pepero last week!!? [ ✉ ➝ 소현이 바보 ♡ ] see if i ever make you anything again!! (*｀へ´*) { ` yoongi stands outside of sohyun's door as he hits send, then leaves five boxes of various flavors of pepero with a note: u lil bitch ♡ }

Once alone; after Taehyun’s left and there’s nothing but a heap of dishes to keep her company because Sohee’s out, either in school or working, like a proper member of society, unlike some - Sohyun chews on the pepero she received earlier that week, thoughts involuntarily tripping over Yoongi and his damn stupid face;

Did he really get her no sweets …? Rude. Rude idiot.

It’s then that her phone vibrates, buzzing on top of the kitchen counter and she has to stretch a few extra inches until it’s in her definite reach, groaning;

Sohyun snorts,

actually breaks into a hearty laughter; Speak of the devil !

✉ [ 민민 ] ⇨ ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ what? did he brag to u

✉ [ 민민 ] ⇨ it’s not like i even noticed, idiot ㅋㅋ

✉ [ 민민 ] ⇨ if it weren’t for the pepero sales i would’ve forgotten!

Of course she haven’t forgotten; it’s a girl’s thing. You just don’t forget about something as special as pepero day.

It’s only when she drags herself outside to grab a smoke that she nearly trips over colourful boxes standing guard at her doorstep, cursing; she finds a note, u lil bitch ♡

✉ [ 민민 ] ⇨ you really love me don’t you ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

✉ [ 민민 ] ⇨ i’m coming over for dinner ♡~ (◡ ε ◡ )

✉ [ 민민 ] ⇨ i’m starving

She encloses a selfie with her last text, a mock-kiss for the pepero box in her hand. So, it seems, - Yoongi’s still in charge of some manners, after all.

#gs: answered #hdxminyoongi #{ ilu }#{ pINCHES YOU GENTLY }

v-e-l-l-e-i-t-y

#gs: work #{ dream salon

chadolbaeki-blog

i did.

#gs: face #{ ghost of the past

"Noona~" almost sing songs and maybe in the tune of replay (SHINee's), who knows? Drums his fingers against the door of her apartment before turning it into a knock, anticipating the moment the door opens and he tries it again, dangling a box of pepero (strawberry this time) before her. "Can't this count as payment for my friend's eventual tattoo?"

Having just dragged herself out of the bed (upon contemplating whether to even try to do anything productive at all when her head feels like it’s made of heavy lead, a hangover induced by too many tequila shots that night,) she rubs her face to fend off sleep as she opens the door ;

"Oh, squirrel boy…,"

Sohyun grins sleepily, but when she takes notice of the Peppero box her face lights up, - hand snatching it before Taehyun even has the chance to finish.

"You actually brought me these !”

"See? And Yoongi got me none, I can’t believe this, Namsshi …,” the artist rambles on, the door open for Taehyun to invite himself in while she pads towards the kitchen with bare feet, to pour both of them a cup of tea.

"And, no, This doesn’t count as payment, not in your wildest dreams, Daramgee.”

#gs: answered #hdxtaehyun #{ SWEET NAMTAE WHY ARE YOU SO CUTE #{ and why am i so late?#{ also side-eyes yoongi uhuhuhhu

hdxsohyun

you're a chemical ; sohyun & yoongi

hdxminyoongi-blog

"Nope, not mine" he starts easily with another teasing grin already pulling on one corner of his lips, and wraps his arm around her shoulder, adjusting his body with respect to hers, his side fitting perfectly against hers, and continues, "Just broke in, actually —"

Another short pause finds them while he brings his arm up closer to his face, purposefully tugging on her neck and burying her deep into his chest, to glance at the non-existent watch on his wrist, “— oh shit wait, the real owner might come home soon, we should probably go soon.”

His voice is filled with faux urgency but the lack of motion in his body and the full-fledged smirk prove his words otherwise — he doesn’t plan on leaving anytime soon. Not when Sohyun’s right there and there’s years of catching up to do. Years of missed affectionate insults and opportunities between them.

He lets the joke pass, releasing her head from his chest, one hand sliding back onto her shoulder, the other subconsciously intertwining fingers with hers. A warm thumb rubs circles into the back of her hand while he snorts, shrugs, and answers jokingly,

"Damn, did rehab make you ruder?"

The back of his mind wonders if the light mention is okay, hopes it’s okay, hopes it’s not too early or a heavy blow on her pride. Maybe if this was childhood them, he wouldn’t have such thoughts in the corner of his mind. But freshly reunited Sohyun-Yoongi, though still comfortable, easy, and familiar, is also new at the same time. Limits have to be retested; after all, the water’s new.

Still, his mouth moves before his mind — so contemplation of his word choice doesn’t last very long before he’s moving onto his next sentence, “I’m a pretty successful adult, thank you very much.” He scrunches his nose at her, eyes crinkling when he scoffs.

"My near one million subscriber count on YouTube can back that up," he adds, briefly unwrapping his arm from around her shoulder to bring a peace sign to his eyes, punctuating with a click of his tongue and a wink. Being modest was never one of his strong points, anyway.

"Plus, I’ll bet my entire life your apartment doesn’t look any better than mine. Probably smells like alcohol and cigarettes, too."

The grin of mischief seems like it doesn’t want to leave his face anytime soon, and he nudges her with the side of his body, sliding his arm back under her neck and around her shoulder.

"When am I gonna be invited, though?" he asks (more like expects, truly).

hdxsohyun

"Ah, really-- !" she whines, all-too-familiar irritation building up as a soft groan escapes her lips, muffled by Yoongi's shirt when she's pulled into a playful hug disguised as one of the boy's jokes. She knows them all too well, having put up with Yoongi's humour thorough their academic years, and she can only testify that they got worse with time. In fact, Yoongi's humour is quite terrible, - and she can't help but laugh as she's finally released, head thrown back. (She'd never admit it, but there might be a soft spot she holds for Yoongi's one-liners.)

The hand she holds in hers is warm, and for a moment she has to wonder when was the last time she felt so comfortable being this close to anyone (one-night stands excluded). Sohyun glances at his face, snorts, and has to backtrack to her last memory of ever seeing Yoongi run for real (upon the mention of having to leave the flat, fast), - and it had to be one of the last basketball matches she's seen him where he exercised his body seriously. The fact that she stopped coming altogether stings her, but the soothing circles against her skin have the bitter thought disappear.

Sohyun slaps the boy's shoulder, a childish pout gracing her features. It isn't a light topic to touch upon, - a taboo in public, a secretive talk among family and friends. But she feels like she owes Yoongi this, - she owes him something like an explanation, (and she had been anxious this,) but oddly enough she feels like there's no pressure, like she can talk about this comfortably without burdening him or feel vulnerable before him.

"What, it just made me into a realist, Yoongi-ah," Sohyun sticks out her tongue, reaching out to boop the boy's nose with her thumb,

"I can't believe so many people are interested in how you fail at life, Min Yoongi. And, I'm not too sure I want you to come over? My roommate is really pretty you know, you're going to scare her off …and, ruin my image! Make it worse than it probably is already," she has to laugh again, resting her head back against Yoongi's arm, reaching for his hand again. "I mean, we're going to pass out watching something in my bed like losers anyway,"

The fond memories make her smile wide, - genuine warmth spreading through her body and reaching her cheeks as well. "While we're at it give me your phone number, rascal. Or a can of beer, either works," she looks at him with a quirked brow, the time on the clock deeming it too late to anything more productive than catching up, - which both of them need, desperately enough.

#gs: you're a chemical #hdxminyoongi #{ WHEEZE SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG!#{ sjhfkhgkdhgkfdgg

hdxtaehyun

im•print。ft. sohyun

hdxtaehyun

Could toss the words right back at you, he’s tempted to comment because the punk here is clearly the tattoo artist. After all, Taehyun is well-dressed to the fine print of his skin and the way his hair is meticulously tucked behind his ears.

Ashes, ashes, we all fall down - and he wishes he could too, slip into a phase that did not require such a stiff attire, figurative tie choking him. Bad habits spring forth and he takes in the growing pile. How many has she gone through already…

That’s not what he’s here for. Gaze flickers down to the distinct outlines of the banana peel. Despite the initial qualms, he’s grown quite fond of it. Less of a mistake and more of something he defends when some brain lacking monkey has the nerve to gape and ask is that a banana peel. Because yes, idiot. Do you have a problem with it? He doubts that his rough language will disappear anytime soon.

"At least I’m helping you add to your portfolio," a kind and gentle reminder on the behalf of the most generous man to grace this planet. Overstatement, but perhaps next time he’ll get something halfway decent to actually contribute to Sohyun’s collection. After all, it is the least he can do - become an experimentation of sorts (although he still has doubts about her preferences).

Lips twist into a half smirk upon the suggestion. Not bad at all but: “are you only capable of coming up with rotten or left over fruit? Expected better from you, noona.” A light tease as he imagines Jackson sporting an apple core (preferably somewhere visible).

hdxsohyun

If only she could hear the words resonating in Taehyun's head, - if only, - she'd be already pulling at his ear, lowering her lovely dongsaeng to preferred eye-level for a little lecture (not that she has the right, but.) Despite the relatively short time they've known each other (ever since she moved to Hongdae months back,) Sohyun grew to like Taehyun like a troublemaker younger brother of sorts, a head and a half taller than her.

She's seen him in less unfortunate situations (had never seen him cry though), and even witnessed a fearless act of defending one's honour, - even hers when gentlemen forgot their manners. They clicked together in a way that favoured sarcasm, music critique or complete silence.

...

Sohyun scoops up the ashtray and empties the contents into a dumpster, sitting back down on her makeshift street throne, - another cigarette dangling from her lips, - Helps me think, she always says.

"That's so kind of you, Namtae," she plays along and strikes a match to inhale, has to admit that the clientele actually enjoys small bizarre pieces just like Taehyun's banana peel situated on the wrist.

"…and if you want one than take it, you're going to pass the nervous habit onto me if you don't stop," offering a cigarette from her pack, she wonders whether Taehyun refuses because the brand differs.

"You're both like rotten fruits, that's why," the artist scoffs, chuckling behind a palm. "It's either that or we can sink lower and go for a toilet seat if that tickles your fancy, Nam,"

#gs: imprint #hdxtaehyun #{ pLS MAKE UP YOUR MIND

hdxsohyun

go, sister ; sohyun & sohee

hdxsohee-deactivated20141218

sohyun’s words cut the air, but the girl’s tears continue, her silence dragging on with the sound of her sniffles becoming the only noise. her crying doesn’t come to a halt, but it’s gradual, the tears swiped by the back of her fingers as she adjusts her legs. toes brush against the broken glass, hues fixating on the scattered pieces while memories of an earlier time flood her mind. she’s consumed yet again, fixed on what went wrong as everything’s replayed.

she doesn’t even know where to start.

how long has the other felt this way? when she moved in, sohee was nothing but smiles, excited, friendly and happy to have a housemate. admittedly, the other’s gaze intimidated her at first, and there was an odd air she felt, but she’s the type to brush it off, especially since the stranger was to become her roommate. she wanted to become friends, get to know the older female better and live in harmony. but what she wished for wasn’t granted.

did she do something wrong? sohyun avoided her— well, at least that’s how sohee saw it. they didn’t eat together, the two preparing their meals at different times in silence and whenever they were within any vicinity of one another, there was tension. the girl felt uncomfortable, assuming each time that she must’ve did something to get on sohyun’s nerves.

but then, sohee got annoyed.

why was she like this? sohyun did nothing but sleep all day, and even if they left the house later on sohee would wake up in the middle of the night to witness the drunk female stumbling around.

what else could she do? nothing. sohee put up with it. days spent silence, eyes never meeting each others while they moved about. lips remained shut, the rosy colors disappearing into a line while she went on with life. there was school to attend. a shop to tend. her grandparents to look after. there were several things she prioritized over making friends with her roommate, so whatever words they exchanged were short, curt and to the point. nothing dragged out. she was busy after all.

now, back to the present.

everything was like usual. the brunette was in the kitchen, preparing food ( kimbap ) to eat later. her eyes remained focused on slicing up the vegetables, not even realizing that her roommate had stepped out from their shower. so she’s quiet, knife in hand and meticulous about the ingredients. it’s minutes later when the knife slides, narrowly missing her fingers and clattering on the board with glass shattered on the floor. she’s shocked, confused and anger immediately shifts her features as she watches the glittering pieces on the floor.

"what the he—" and the war begins. the two are at each other, yelling at the top of their lungs. accusations. harmful words. secrets. all came spilling out in their heated argument. they toss every little thing at one another and it leads to hot tears streaming down sohee’s cheeks. she’s furious but the emotion’s overshadowed by a sense of guilt. endless tears are all that comes, and soon she’s a mess. sitting on the floor of the kitchen and silently trying to get a hold of her emotions.

"no, don’t be sorry… "

her first words after the mess, the last of the tears drying up while she carefully looks over to the other. the edges of her lips start to pull in the tiniest of smiles, arms unraveling and hands moving to push strands of hair away from her features. “you weren’t being a … bitch.” her voice lowers to a whisper at the last word, “you were upset with me. it’s alright… we got everything out— well, at least i did.” a laugh. the sound actually escapes her lips, amusement becoming visible even for just a few seconds. "if anyone should be sorry, it should be me." she adds on before glancing at the crystalline pieces on the floor.

"we should probably get this cleaned up. "

hdxsohyun

Another sigh, inhale,

exhale,

exhaustion but no bitter aftertaste. Sohyun understands that the bubble that burst had been a major misunderstanding, and because she refused to treat it from the very beginning it just grew and grew -- and she feels terrible for stooping as low as making Sohee cry. She should've put it behind her, whatever prejudice she accumulated in that dumb head of hers (she wants to knock on the skull to check for contents.)

The guilt makes her tighten the hold on the younger girl, she pretends she shields her from the words that spilled between them earlier. Sohyun wishes they never left her mouth, - but without this they wouldn't have moved forward. When the deed's done she's glad that they come clean and clear, - tears cleansing the hurt, saltless medicine for the wound.

A small smile curls on her lips, teeth showing, "What are you saying? I was terrible …"

It's true and she knows it, but strength comes from accepting one's flaws (even if they're hard to fix and mend.)

"I could've had a wonderful roommate and not a silent martyr who put up with my bullshit," Sohyun squeezes her again but this time she withdraws her hands afterwards, to fix hair and straighten clothes, she gets up and offers a hand to Sohee.

"Be careful with the glass, okay?"

She decides that to make it up she needs to start now, because months of living with a dreadful roommate (her,) could've easily messed up Sohee's life bit by bit, - like not getting enough sleep here and there, especially when Sohyun used to stumble home drunk and obnoxious.

The kitchen is cleaned up, and two of them stick side by side, - the older at the table, the younger cooking utensils in hand again,

"Can I, …" words are shy at first, Sohyun bites her lip, but baby steps are needed ; "Can I help you with that?"

#gs: go sister #hdxsohee #{ SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG DARLING i marveled over your brilliant writing ;vvvvvv;#{ let me love you!

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All right - Lim Kim

hdxsohyun

I thought of you all night Toward you, I felt delight Inside the fog, some light

you're a chemical ; sohyun & yoongi

hdxminyoongi-blog

It’s not like Yoongi hasn’t made friends in her absence. He’s made plenty over the years, both in Daegu and in Hongdae when he made the move. Even with just a little over a year in Hongdae under his belt, he has a good handful he’d call close friends. Drinking, clubbing, going out for late dinners, and just doing random shit — he can do any of that with the friends he’s made, really. So, in that respect, Sohyun isn’t anything special.

But, in reality, she is.

He can’t put it into words why — hilarious for a guy who doesn’t know when to shut up — he just knows. Knows that the past couple of years always had something missing. Knows that regardless of the shit they silently went through, there’s no way he could have slammed the door in her face. Knows that it’s perfectly okay to pretend nothing happened, to slide past the ‘where have you been’s and spoken ‘I missed you’s, because it’s easier for them this way; because they both prefer it.

When she laughs, he follows suit all too easily before letting a short, but high-pitched, sound leave his lips when fingers pinch at his side. He retaliates by adding more pressure on her body as he lays on top, grin remaining although his laughter subsides.

"Of course, I’m not giving up sleep just cause you’re here now," he mumbles through his smile, eyes still shut, and repositions himself when she shoves him. His eyes peek open, though, and he continues in jest, "Manners, though? I think you found the wrong Min Yoongi." He’s laughing again, though much softer this time, airily. There’s a light reminder of how long it really has been since they’ve purely enjoyed each other’s company in her last sentence, but he chooses to ignore the sinking feeling it threatens his heart with. Because the past is the past and she’s there now, fingers in his hair, chest moving up and down with her every breath underneath him. And that’s all that matters.

His eyelids flutter down again, enjoying the slight tickle of her hand in his hair for a few silent beats, breathing and heartbeat evening out after the surprise. Then he opens his eyes again, rolling off of her to move up on his bed, back bent at a small again against his pillow. He pats the empty space next to him, arm held out — the perfect fit for Sohyun — and says, “But fine, I’ll be decent I guess, come here,” in a voice much softer than he intended.

So he adds, “Come to oppa,” with a wiggle of his eyebrows and a smirk on his lips, because god forbid he goes two seconds without teasing her.

hdxsohyun

"Oh, really? I think I misread the address, you must be right," she rolls her eyes, voice gaining on that sarcastic tone they used to mock each other with when none of them willed to back out of an argument. There were times like that too, she remembers well ; Their tastes being so similar they even used to fight over desserts in school cafeteria. No pretence between them, no secrets ; and Sohyun wonders how they didn't turn to dust over the span of past few years.

She flicks his forehead, - Yoongi's cheshire grin is both annoying and irresistible, - an equation that doesn't quite make sense. Sohyun huffs and even allows her cheeks to emphasise a pout until Yoongi decides to spare her and move, and she shoves him just a little as he does, lips curling into a smile again.

The fate had it that she came to Seoul to pursue happiness and piece herself back together ; finding friends and support along the way, but she'd never forget where she came from, - where they came from, - and about the history between them. It's so easy to pretend that nothing happened for now, - no demons to haunt them tonight.

Yoongi wouldn't know, - but as eyes flutter shut, she secretly presses the expression he wears to the back of her eyelids, every little change she needs to catch up on from when they were just clueless kids ;

How dare you become this handsome ? How dare you take me back easily like this, … ?

With an amused smile she lets him move over and she follows suit, climbs the mattress properly and fixes her hair with a little tilt of her head. It's hard to explain the lightness she feels, - after she feared rejection (what she deserved, really) or a patronising speech and yet here he is, offering embrace instead of a cold shoulder.

“Come to oppa,”

Sohyun quirks a brow and reaches for a pillow at her feet expressionlessly, and straight out whacks the young Youtuber over the head with it.

"Grease."

She cuddles up to him nevertheless, head rested against the shoulder ; a place to leave her worries behind.

"So this is your flat?" she asks with eyes closed (hoping she'd get a tour later), and finds Yoongi's hand with inconspicuous fingers, unsure what she intends, really, just holding it for now.

"I can't believe I didn't trip over a pile of trash when I walked in, what happened? Trying hard with the adult life?"