Insecurity and taking control
Anonymous asked: I find myself always questioning WHY, even if I know I am loved, WHY don’t I feel that way? Why do I always feel I’m not _______ enough. Am I just being a big brat, not looking at how much I am immensely loved? I feel like I’m not on the same page with God now, because if I am, we’d see eye-to-eye on this love thing, I’d take to heart what it means to be loved. I don’t feel like God’s love ever resolves anything. [edited for length]
Unka Glen answered: Here’s the main problem with insecurity: we think it’s everyone else’s job to fix it. YOU have to love me more than I hate myself. YOU have to give me so much approval that it makes me have high self-esteem. YOU have to overwhelm me with acceptance, until I just can’t feel insecure anymore.
But the truth is, it’s up to you. God stands at your door and knocks, if you open that door, you’ll receive love; if you shut that door, you won’t. it’s that simple. As Matthew 18:18 says, ”whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.”
If you won’t let yourself receive love from God, it doesn’t really exist in your life, and you’re right, it has no power to change anything.
Here’s another problem with insecurity: we treat it like a puzzle to be solved. Why do I feel this way? Where does it all come from? If I feel it so strong, doesn’t that mean it’s a little bit true? Let’s examine this thing from every angle!
It’s all meant to be a distraction.
All this “good enough” or “holy enough” talk comes from the enemy. And like all of his lies, they are so stupid that they fall apart once you shed any amount of light on them.
In five seconds I can break that lie down. Ready? Here goes: love has nothing to do with merit. Little babies aren’t “good enough” to earn their parents love. They poop their dang pants every day, and they never help out with the rent. But you love them anyway, because they are YOURS.
It’s not about answering the question of “am I good enough”, it’s about realizing that the flippin’ question makes no sense. God loves you because you’re His. Period.
Insecurity is a bag of rocks. Drop it and walk away. Insecurity is pointless, anti-Christian, and it’s relationship poison.
Meanwhile, a deeper calling is taking root in your life. One that’s calling you to leave all this self-focus and self-obsession and endless comparisons. You feel this voice calling you to come away and be a part of something bigger and more important. To join amazing companions and have epic adventures, and to find a deeper connection with God.
Of course you’ll have to leave your insecurity behind. Heavy loads and epic journeys don’t go together.
