あたし ⎯⎯ Libra — October 20th is my date, INTP-T. A person with a chaotic life who finds some comfort in escaping reality through writing. I suffer from an overactive imagination, but I don’t always know how to put my ideas into words. She/her. A lover of psychology, rational to the point of emotional detachment. A K-pop fan since 2017, formerly a multi-stan; "ENHA FAN" since 2020 (because I like ENHYPEN). Currently EVER; I only actively stan EVAN.
Spanish is my first language, and I have an intermediate level of English, so I think it’s normal if you sometimes notice grammatical mistakes in my writing. I also love editing. I’m obsessed with aesthetics (that's why I change the look of my blog so often). I'm into anime, manga, and manhwa. I also love Sanrio characters, Hironos, and Skullpandas. I'm into video games too, along with a bunch of other things. Blue is my favorite color.
𝗕𝗟𝗢𝗚 𝗧𝗢𝗣𝗜𝗖 ⎯⎯ From the very beginning, I've made it clear that this is a solo blog. I started writing specifically for Heeseung, and I've made sure it has stayed that way, and it will continue to be that way in the long run. MY BLOG IS DEDICATED EXCLUSIVELY TO HEESEUNG/EVAN. I feel the need to reaffirm that, since I've received multiple requests asking me to write for other ENHYPEN members without first taking a moment to understand the nature of my blog. So, I'd really appreciate it if you could respect my space and the purpose of this blog, so we can avoid any unnecessary awkward situations. Thank you for understanding. ♡
𝗠𝗬 𝗦𝗖𝗛𝗘𝗗𝗨𝗟𝗘 ⎯⎯ I'm not fully active... partly because I like keeping a little sense of anticipation. Still, I try to show up with at least one post a week (sometimes two). Generally speaking, my updates tend to happen over the weekend. As for the exact time... I can't really promise one, mostly because of time zone differences, especially my own.
𝗥𝗘𝗤𝗨𝗘𝗦𝗧𝗦 ⎯⎯ I do accept requests, so feel free to send me any idea you'd like, as long as it follows my request guidelines and respects my content restrictions. Please also make sure to check whether requests are currently open or closed before sending one. REQUESTS ARE CURRENTLY CLOSED. If you do send a request when they're open, please keep in mind that I don't work through them in any specific order. I write based on whatever inspires me at the moment, so some requests may take longer than others before they're eventually posted.
𝟎𝟒 ㅤㅤ✿𝆬 𓂂 𝗪𝗛𝗜𝗧𝗘 𝗡𝗢𝗜𝗦𝗘 ⎯⎯⎯⎯ （ 𝗪𝗖 : 𝟱.𝟳𝗞 ）: age gap romance, established relationship, domestic fluff, insecurities, hurt comfort, sweet romance, protective boyfriend, emotional support, healthy relationship.
The blue ones... those are my thing! Meaning they’re not requests, just things I wanted to write. Because yup, I won't just be writing based on requests, I’ll also be tossing in some of my own ideas.
The murmur of the classroom was the usual sonic backdrop to your Thursday afternoons. You were sitting at your desk, a pen spinning lazily between your fingers and your notebook open to a half-filled page, simply enjoying the warmth of the shared space. Around you, Jiwon, Sunhee, and Chaeyeon chatted with the light familiarity of people who had survived four years of university together. They weren’t your inner circle, but daily coexistence had forged a genuine comfort in interacting with one another.
The conversation flowed between laughter, complaints about final assignments, and increasingly real plans for the graduation ceremony. The future felt just around the corner. However, the direction of the talk naturally shifted to more sentimental territory when Jiwon rested her elbows on the table and glanced sideways at Sunhee.
“By the way, you haven’t told us anything. How did the blind date go last Saturday? You said it was a friend of your brother’s, right?” Jiwon asked with a mischievous smile, wiggling her eyebrows to tease her a little.Sunhee immediately tilted her head back and let out a frustrated huff that made her bangs dance across her forehead. She rubbed her temples before straightening up, crossing her arms in indignation.
“An absolute disaster,” she declared, her expression hardening, before letting out a heavy sigh and continuing her story. “Turns out the guy was several years older than me. He was in that typical pathetic stage where men chase after young women to suck up their vitality and feel young again themselves. At first he tried to impress me; he took me to that ridiculously expensive new restaurant that just opened do you guys know which one I mean?” She paused to make sure everyone was following. The others nodded attentively, including you. “Well, halfway through dinner, he put on a tragic face, patted his pockets, and said he’d left his wallet in the car. He asked me to pay the bill, promising to transfer the money later…”
“Don’t leave the story there, please. Keep going,” Chaeyeon urged, leaning forward and sparking your curiosity. You also set your pen aside, stunned by the guy’s audacity.
“The worst part came at the end…” Sunhee continued, lowering her voice dramatically. “Right as we were finishing dessert, a woman stormed into the restaurant in a rage. It turned out the transfer was never going to happen because the guy was married, and the card he was planning to use was from a joint account his wife monitored. He used me as both an alibi and a wallet.”
A chorus of indignant exclamations echoed through the small group. Your eyes widened, sharing in the general disbelief at such boldness.
“It never fails,” Chaeyeon chimed in, shaking her head as she absentmindedly organized some notes. “Last semester I dated an older guy for a couple of months. He'd already graduated and had a stable job and it was the same thing. They’re manipulative by nature.”
From that point on, the table turned into a collective tribunal criticizing age-gap relationships. You listened to the arguments with a growing sense of detachment, a subtle weight settling in your chest. For you, the idea of being with someone older didn’t evoke lies or strange power dynamics; it evoked maturity, a warm home, and safe arms waiting for you at the end of the day.
Taking advantage of a pause in Sunhee’s torrent of complaints, you decided to speak, weighing your words carefully so as not to sound pretentious.
“Why do you think it always has to be something bad?” you asked, tilting your head slightly and offering a soft smile in an attempt to ease the mood. “I mean… I’m in a pretty stable relationship. My partner and I have been together for almost two years, we share an apartment, and everything works wonderfully between us.”
The silence that followed your words was sudden. Sunhee studied you carefully, weighing your comment before resting her chin on her hand in a posture meant to be protective, though it only made your shoulders tense.
“That’s exactly why you should be careful,” Sunhee warned, her voice carrying an imposed maturity that didn’t feel convincing to you. “Men who are already established and go after younger girls usually just want fun. They’re looking for an escape from their adult responsibilities. Their perfect target is sweet, attentive, loving girls because what they crave most is constant attention. In fact, men with money tend to win girls over that way. But the moment they get bored or get what they want, they break your heart without looking back, and you’ll never see a single bill from them again.”
Chaeyeon nodded silently, backing up the argument. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, feeling the air in the classroom suddenly grow a little thicker.
“My advice is not to be too clingy or overly affectionate, or you might tire him out. Although, well… if you’ve been living together for two years and he’s still there, it’s obvious there’s something keeping him strongly attached. He’s getting something out of it,” Sunhee continued, locking eyes with you. Then she paused deliberately. Her eyes sparkled with direct curiosity that made you straighten your back instantly.“
You’ve already slept with him, right?” she asked bluntly, though she tried to soften the indiscretion with an apologetic grimace.
Feeling a subtle warmth rise up your neck, you kept your composure. You had nothing to be ashamed of.
“We live together. It’s obvious we have an active intimate life,” you replied firmly, holding her gaze. Sunhee stayed quiet for a couple of seconds, processing the confirmation while drumming her fingers on the wooden desk. Finally, she let out a small laugh, a mix of resignation and mischief that turned your stomach.
“Well, there you have it. Either he likes you way too much, or the sex is so damn good it’s keeping a man like him tied to your side.”
The comment landed like a bucket of cold water, striking directly at your dignity. The implication that Heeseung’s interest could be reduced to mere physical satisfaction turned the warmth of your afternoon into a sharp pang of deep discomfort. You opened your mouth, defensive words crowding your throat ready to remind Sunhee about the breakfast he made you every morning, the unconditional support he gave you during your sleepless nights, and the genuine love that filled your home.
However, the shrill sound of the classroom door interrupted your thoughts. The professor entered with hurried steps, followed by a couple of late students, effectively ending any hallway conversation. The group of girls immediately disbanded, turning toward the front. You mechanically followed suit, picking up the pen you had abandoned minutes earlier. The professor began to speak, projecting slides onto the board, but his words floated in the air without registering in your mind.
“Or the sex is so damn good it’s keeping a man like him tied to your side?”
Sunhee’s phrase repeated like an annoying echo in your head. You stared at the blank page in your notebook. Heeseung was about to take on a huge corporate position, dealing with high-stakes meetings and the transition of the family business, while you were still handling university assignments. You knew he loved you; you had no doubts about his daily care. But for the first time, a tiny shadow of doubt crept into your thoughts:
Could it be possible that the differences in your worlds were reduced to that in his mind?
Was there really a chance that was the reason everything worked so well?
More later... Night had completely fallen by the time you finally crossed the threshold of the faculty building and headed slowly toward the bus stop. The cool evening air failed to calm the tangle of thoughts twisting tighter in your mind. You pulled your phone from your coat pocket; the screen lit up your face, showing several notifications that had accumulated over the past few hours. They were all from Heeseung.
“Have you left your last class yet, sweetheart?” “Let me know when you’re heading to the stop.” “Don’t forget to text me as soon as you get home, please. Be very careful on the way. I love you.”
They were messages filled with his usual sweetness and meticulous attention. However, with Sunhee’s words still lingering like subtle poison in your head, you couldn’t bring yourself to type back. You locked the screen, put the phone away, and felt a pang of guilt that only fueled your internal debate.
When you reached the building, the elevator took you to your floor and you entered the door code. You stepped into the apartment with visible reluctance, leaving your shoes in the entryway and dropping your backpack on the small console table. Immediately, the comforting warmth of the place enveloped you; the subtle scent of lavender and wood that characterized your shared home acted as a momentary balm.
You walked straight to the kitchen with the intention of preparing dinner. Cooking for Heeseung was your favorite ritual, a tangible way to repay the sanctuary of stability and comfort he had built for you, making sure you never lacked anything, no matter how small.
As you chopped vegetables, common sense tried to win out over insecurity: How could you doubt a man who did nothing but worship the ground you walked on? But the impertinent little voice of doubt returned: She has more experience. Mature men are skilled. In a moment of frustration, a dangerous idea crossed your mind. Maybe you needed to test him. Just a little. Create a small distance to see how he reacted and silence, once and for all, the insecurities that had been planted in you.
Close to ten at night, the sound of the electronic lock announced Heeseung’s return. The door opened and his usually firm footsteps echoed in the entryway.
“I’m home, my love,” he announced in his deep voice, tinged with the fatigue of a day full of corporate meetings but filled with the genuine joy of someone who knew he had arrived at his safe place.
He paused for a moment in the vestibule. His eyes automatically traveled down the hallway, expecting to see your figure running to meet him and throw your arms around his neck, as you did almost every night. When he found only emptiness, a flash of confusion crossed his gaze. He blinked a couple of times, pushing the strange feeling down. He took off his shoes, loosened his tie with one hand, and walked further into the apartment.He quickly found you in the kitchen. You were sitting on one of the high stools by the central island, laptop open and several notebooks and papers scattered around you, pretending to be completely absorbed in your studies. Seeing you there in your comfortable home clothes with your hair slightly tousled in a messy bun, the stiffness in his shoulders seemed to evaporate. A wide, genuine smile transformed his face, lighting up his eyes.
“Hi, beautiful. I’m home~” he said again, this time closer, setting something down on the edge of the island. Without waiting for an invitation, he closed the distance and positioned himself behind you. His long, warm arms wrapped naturally around your waist, pressing his chest against your back in a comforting embrace. Heeseung tilted his head, seeking the exposed skin of your neck to leave a trail of soft, slow, warm kisses, the kind that always made you smile.
“How was your day?” he murmured against your skin, his warm breath brushing your collarbone. “Did you eat well on campus? There wasn’t much traffic on the way, right?” He paused, burying his face in your shoulder with a pampered sigh. “You had me worried. You left all my messages on read. I thought something had happened to you.”
You tensed subtly under his touch, doing your best not to melt at the familiarity of his affection. Keeping your eyes fixed on the laptop screen, you answered in a deliberately neutral voice, dodging each of his specific questions: “Everything’s fine. I was just really busy, but I managed to handle all the university stuff.”
Hearing such a curt response, stripped of your usual warmth, Heeseung frowned. His lips stilled against your neck. But he didn’t let go; instead, his arms tightened a little more around your waist, as if afraid you might slip away. He rested his chin on your shoulder, tilting his face to first glance at the graphs on your screen and then scrutinize your profile.
He noticed the change instantly. He registered the lack of sparkle in your eyes, the stiffness in your posture, and the conscious effort you were making to maintain emotional distance. He knew you with meticulous depth; he read your silences as easily as he read his financial reports. He loved you so devotedly that your attempt at indifference quickly sank deep.
"Your dinner is ready. I kept it in the oven so it wouldn’t get cold,” you suddenly commented, breaking eye contact with the screen for barely a second. Your voice sounded flat, lacking the melodic tones he adored, extending an invisible but palpable distance between you.
Heeseung let out a heavy sigh, exhaling through his nose as his shoulders drooped slightly. He didn’t like this sudden shift in their dynamic at all; he didn’t like being treated with such cold indifference, especially when you had accustomed him to an oasis of affection, spontaneous hugs, and sweet words. Still, he held back and decided not to reproach you yet.
“Thank you. You’re always such an angel,” he replied in a murmur, maintaining his characteristic chivalry and gratitude. He leaned in to place a tender kiss on your cheek, savoring the softness of your skin before slowly pulling away.
But Lee Heeseung was not someone who gave up easily, especially when it came to you. Determined to melt this inexplicable ice, he gestured with his chin toward the small white box he had left on the island when he arrived.
“Oh, by the way… Right after leaving the office, I stopped by that new pastry shop you mentioned the other day,” he said, his voice soft and conspiratorial. “I bought the flower-shaped pastries you’ve been wanting to try so badly.”
With slow movements, he pulled the satin ribbon and opened the box, revealing the meticulously decorated desserts shaped like perfect glazed petals. The sweet scent of vanilla and strawberries hit you, and you couldn’t help it. Your eyes sparkled with genuine excitement and instinctively flicked toward them. A sly, triumphant smile appeared on his lips; he knew his little woman’s weakness for sweets perfectly and savored that small victory.
Or so he thought, because the excitement didn’t last long. He soon saw you recompose your posture immediately, forcing your face back to its initial coldness and returning your gaze to the laptop.
“Thanks. I’ll eat them later,” you replied curtly, typing something random to pretend to be busy.
The hope in Heeseung’s eyes shattered in that exact moment. The corner of his mouth dropped, and a look of genuine bewilderment shadowed his features as he realized his foolproof tactic had failed. Swallowing hard, he carefully closed the box and moved toward the refrigerator to put it away. When he returned, he took his plate out of the oven; the aroma of homemade food filled the air, but the atmosphere remained strangely frosty.
He sat on the high stool directly across from you, on the other side of the island. You thought you were hiding it perfectly behind the screen, but to him it was obvious you weren’t fully focused. He could sense the hidden anxiety in the stiffness of your fingers on the keyboard and in the way you breathed. He knew something was deeply bothering you; your eyes screamed it in a language that was obvious to him, even if you didn’t say a word.
Determined to break the tension, he began eating but refused to let silence reign between you. With that warm voice that usually lulled you, he started telling you about his day at the office, weaving interesting anecdotes and describing how it finally felt to assume the position he had coveted for so long: now officially the CEO and head of the family business. As he spoke, he watched you intently between bites, paying attention to your every micro-movement.
He clearly saw the way you bit the inside of your cheek, an unconscious habit that betrayed how badly you wanted to respond or congratulate him with the pride you always showed. He also caught how you desperately pretended to search for a sheet of paper or rearrange a pen every time he caught you paying attention or subtly nodding at his words. To him, the situation was as amusing as it was frustrating, but he stayed firm, quietly enjoying the subtle ebb and flow of your reactions.When he finished eating, he cleared his plate, meticulously wiped the island, and turned to you, rolling up the cuffs of his shirt.
“I’m going to take a shower,” he announced, fixing his dark eyes on yours. In that microsecond, he saw you shrink slightly in your seat.
Their recent nightly showers together had become his favorite ritual, a private space where they made love unhurriedly under the hot water, or simply shared silence as the steam washed away the worries and weight of the day. It was his last tactic of the night, a silent invitation to reconcile.
But, unfortunately, it failed again.
“I already showered earlier. I wasn’t going to study all sweaty and smelling like food,” you answered, keeping your eyes fixed on your notes as you organized them.Heeseung remained silent for a couple of seconds. He simply nodded slowly while watching you from his spot as you organized your folders and closed the laptop with suspicious haste. He didn’t press you or try to force the situation; he preferred to arm himself with patience and respect your space rather than spark an unnecessary fight.
You were the first to leave the kitchen, quickly heading toward the shared bedroom to escape the pressure of his gaze. He stayed alone in the kitchen, letting out a long sigh before making his way to the bathroom.
However, halfway there, a spark of cunning shone in his dark eyes. He headed that way with deliberately loud steps, turned the knob, and opened the door with the usual noise, only to close it again immediately.
With a sly smile, he retreated in silence and hid behind the hallway wall, ready to test a theory. That’s why he stayed there, holding his breath in a moment of pure anticipation. Though he didn’t actually have to wait long. Just as he suspected, the subtle creak of the bedroom door hinges broke the silence of the house, followed by the barely audible sound of stealthy footsteps moving down the hallway.
He peeked out discreetly, delighting in the scene: there you were, on tiptoe, stopping right in front of the bathroom door. After a brief hesitation, your hand wrapped around the chrome knob and you pushed the door open with almost comical slowness, poking your head in with a slightly furrowed brow.
He smiled to himself, feeling a warm flutter in his chest. Knowing you were paying attention to him, that your indifference was just a facade and that you weren’t genuinely upset, brought him back to life.
Taking advantage of your distraction, he slipped out of his hiding spot without making the slightest sound, gliding down the hallway like a shadow. He positioned himself right behind you, closing the entire distance until his body heat brushed against your back. Leaning in, he pressed his lips to the curve of your ear.
“Mind telling me what you’re looking for, my love? Or what exactly you’re doing?” he murmured in his deep voice, dragging the words with amused nonchalance.
A shiver of fright ran down your spine. You gave a little jump, spinning around on your heels, one hand flying to your chest as you swallowed hard, eyes wide open. He let out a soft, husky laugh that reverberated through the hallway. Before you could react, he planted one hand firmly on the doorframe beside your head, completely trapping you in that narrow space.
“I didn’t remember my sweet girl being such a snoop,” he commented with mischief, lowering his gaze to meet yours and clearly enjoying your obvious blush.
“I wasn’t snooping,” you replied immediately, barely regaining your composure. You crossed your arms over your chest and lifted your chin, trying to look as dignified and stern as possible.
He raised an eyebrow, a defiant, teasing spark dancing in his eyes. Far from being intimidated, he straightened up slowly and perfectly mirrored your action, crossing his own arms over his chest and silently daring you to keep up the act.
“Don’t get any weird ideas, okay?” you continued, speaking in a rush as you desperately searched for a way out. “I just… I just came to see if you were already done. I wanted to do my skincare routine, which I completely forgot about earlier. Yeah, that’s it.”
Heeseung narrowed his eyes, making it crystal clear he wasn’t buying that lame excuse for even a second. Still, he decided to grant you a temporary truce. He let out a short sigh, turned his head to the side, and cracked his neck with a smooth motion that stretched the lines of his jaw and made his Adam’s apple stand out prominently.
Unable to help yourself, your eyes traced his neck, mesmerized by the undeniable magnetism of that simple gesture. When you realized you were staring too long, you took a quick step sideways, dodged his arm, and hurried back toward the bedroom.
Heeseung turned on his heels, watching your retreating figure with a mixture of amusement and tenderness. Just before you could close the bedroom door, his voice reached you from a distance, serious, yet laced with playful warning:
“Don’t even think about falling asleep without me, or there will be consequences.”
He wasn’t saying it as a real reprimand, of course, but as a reminder that the night wasn’t going to end on bad terms. He clearly needed to know what was going on in your head before he could even think about closing his eyes. Once he was sure you had gone into the room, Heeseung finally opened the bathroom door for real and stepped inside to take a shower—one that took him quite a while to finish.
He let the hot water cascade over him, washing away the tension built up in his muscles, while resting his forehead against the cold tiles. The playful demeanor from moments ago was gone. Now alone, he carefully replayed every variable, every conversation from the day, searching for the trigger behind your behavior. He hated feeling in the dark; they had never been through anything like this before. They had arguments, like any couple, but they always resolved them by sitting down and talking openly, never resorting to the silent treatment. He even seriously questioned whether he had said or done something wrong without realizing it in the past few days.
When he came out of the bathroom, his hair still damp and dripping lightly onto his shoulders, wearing only a pair of gray pajama pants, he entered the dimly lit bedroom. The first thing that greeted him as he crossed the threshold was the sight of your body curled up under the covers, turned completely on your side and facing away from him.
The gesture hit him like a direct stab, twisting his stomach with the rawness of the physical distance. He even stood frozen for a few seconds beside the bed, contemplating the silhouette of your back with a mix of pain and protective tenderness. Without saying anything yet, he grabbed the towel to finish drying his hair and prepared to lie down beside you, determined not to let the night end in such bitter silence.
Without thinking too much, he extended his arms and wrapped them around your waist, pulling you firmly against his body. He pressed his chest to your back, erasing any trace of physical distance. Through the thin fabric of your pajamas, you could feel the rhythm of his heartbeat, somewhat accelerated, revealing the nerves the situation caused him, but also the deep happiness of having you close. Because even after almost two years, you still had that exact effect on him. He got excited with the same intensity as on the first day.
You didn’t resist his embrace, and feeling you mold against his chest brought him partial relief, even though he could still sense the subtle stiffness in your shoulders.
“My darling…” he whispered in your ear, his voice patient and incredibly soft, drawing out the words with mature and genuine tenderness. “If the reason you’re like this was something I said or did, please forgive me. I swear I’ll make sure it never happens again. But if the cause is something external, or if you’re simply not in a good mood today… I’d like to know. That way I’ll know you need your time and space, and I promise not to be invasive.”
He paused briefly, caressing your hip with his thumb through the fabric of your sleep shorts, carefully weighing his words so as not to pressure you or make you feel guilty in any way.
“It’s different to have an idea of what’s going on than for you to suddenly push me away. Especially when this morning we were perfectly fine before I left you at campus and you said goodbye with that exquisite kiss. The same one that stayed with me all day… and you have no idea how much I’m craving another one right now. But first, I want us to clear this up. I love you, and I just want us to be okay.”
Hearing the vulnerability in his confession, something inside you finally broke. The tension accumulated in your muscles evaporated all at once, allowing you to relax completely against him. The change was so noticeable that Heeseung reacted immediately; he hugged you with a bit more insistence, burying his face in the crook of your neck with a sigh of relief. This time you didn’t shrink away; instead, you tilted your head slightly to give him all the space he wanted.
Suddenly, you slowly raised a hand and began stroking his hair, weaving your fingers through the strands that were still slightly damp from the shower. The gesture caught him by surprise. He pulled back just enough to look at your face, and that was when you turned on the mattress to face him directly.
Your eyes were a little watery, reflecting the light from the lamp. Seeing the guilt and vulnerability in your gaze, Hee stretched out his hand to cup your cheek, tracing your cheekbone with his thumb in a protective and loving way. He leaned in and planted a gentle kiss on your forehead, a soft, lingering, warm contact filled with the firm intention of conveying all the security in the world, of letting you know he was there for you, no matter what storm you had inside.
“I’m sorry…” you whispered as soon as he pulled back slightly, feeling the knot in your throat. “Forgive me for being so immature and for treating you with that sudden indifference. It was just a stupid defense mechanism.”
With a slightly shaky voice, you began to open up. You explained the conversation from the afternoon in the classroom, Sunhee’s cynical words about older men and relationships of convenience, and how that external perspective had acted like subtle poison, bringing to the surface insecurities you thought didn’t exist. You confessed the internal debate you had in the kitchen: that annoying struggle between your classmates’ supposed experience and the solid, loving foundation he showed you every day, admitting that your distance was nothing more than a clumsy test to silence your own fears.Heeseung looked at you and listened with infinite patience. His dark eyes showed no anger, only deep empathy, absorbing every one of your exposed thoughts and feelings without interrupting you even once.
“I was such a fool. I’m really sorry. I’m sorry for letting such a ridiculous doubt enter my head when you have never, ever given me a single reason to distrust you,” you concluded, shyly searching his eyes. Hee shook his head softly, offering an understanding smile that helped you breathe again.He pulled you even closer, gently cradling your face between his large hands and forcing you to hold his gaze.
“It’s normal to doubt sometimes, baby. It’s normal to have insecurities because you’re human, and the outside world can sometimes be very loud…” he comforted you, his voice conveying absolute peace. “Actually… Since we’re on the topic, I went through something very similar with people in my circle when we first started dating. They were other men, some older than me, who shared exactly the same outdated ideas as your classmates.”
His eyes hardened slightly as he recalled the past, but his hands remained just as gentle on your skin.
“I even had a pretty heated argument with one of my father’s friends over a derogatory comment he made about us. The guy reduced everything we have, all our connection, to me just wanting to have a good time with someone younger because it was worth the fuck. He said not all women were good for maintaining stability, but there were always exceptions. It made me sick to hear it.”
He paused again, and the silence in the room filled once more with overwhelming intimacy. They stared at each other, finding in one another’s eyes the reflection of the same invisible battles they had fought to protect their bubble. At the same time, as if sharing the same breath, both let out a long sigh of relief and came together in a hungry kiss, filled with a need that had been held back for hours. It was a deep kiss, soaked in millions of accumulated emotions, where the taste of reconciliation and the heat of their lips made them completely lose themselves in the certainty of their love.
When you pulled apart by just a few millimeters, foreheads still pressed together and breaths ragged, Heeseung caressed your lower lip with his thumb.
“I’ve done it before, and I’ll keep doing it every day of my life… showing you with actions and facts that you are my everything. That you’re not anyone’s pastime,” he declared, looking at you with an almost sacred devotion. “I won’t deny that making love to you is simply incredible. I’ve never connected with anyone the way I do with you; I’m literally ruined for anyone else. I belong completely to you. But that will never be the only reason. There’s so much more. I love you in the most genuine way possible. You have all of me. I'm completely at your feet… You are my goddess and I am the happiest man for serving you.”
A small laugh the first of the entire day escaped your lips, completely dissolving the last layer of tension in the air. And with it, Heeseung felt the greatest relief of his life upon hearing that sound. He let out a soft chuckle and hugged you tightly, letting himself fall slightly over you to tenderly pin you against the mattress.
“God, what a joy to see you smile again. I swear I was this close to crying right here if you kept ignoring me any longer,” he admitted, hiding his face in your neck while squeezing you.
You laughed harder, infected by his childish dramatics, while trying unsuccessfully to push his shoulders lightly.
“You’re so adorable, and I… I’m so in love with you that it sometimes hurts. Also… let me tell you, you looked absolutely hilarious trying to stay serious and firm in the kitchen. Your eyes gave you away from a mile away you were dying to run into my arms,” he added, pulling back a bit to look down at you, his eyes full of a loving sparkle.
Offended at having been caught so easily, you gave him a playful little bite on his bare arm. Heeseung let out an exaggerated whine, pulling away with completely fake indignation.
“Hey! So that’s how it is?” he complained dramatically, before letting himself fall on you again, pinning your hands to the pillow and covering your face with quick, noisy kisses that made you squirm with laughter. “I’m going to punish you severely for ignoring me, miss.”
“Oh yeah? And what’s the punishment?” you asked, a bright smile on your face as you wrapped your free arms around his neck.He paused, looking at you with infinite tenderness before leaving one last short, sweet kiss on your lips.
“We’ll discuss the punishment later, probably this weekend. Because right now, my sleep-deprived university student and I need to sleep. We have to wake up early tomorrow, babe” he whispered, settling beside you, pulling the covers over both of you up to their shoulders, and then reaching out to finally turn off the bedside lamp, plunging the room into a warm, protective dimness.
In the darkness, he pulled you close to his chest again, intertwining his legs with yours and placing one final kiss on your head. With the slow rhythm of his breathing lulling you and the warmth of his body enveloping you, you fell asleep with an unshakable certainty in your heart: the outside world could have a thousand opinions and prejudices, but within these four walls, in the arms of the man who lived to see you smile, you were exactly where you belonged.
I really, REALLY hope u don’t get discouraged by any low engagements with ur sugar talk event — ultimately, this is for yourself and yourself only; there are so many people that support you and know how talented u are as a writer and so I hope u take this opportunity to do what u always intended w the sugar talk event
Honestly... I've been dealing with this lack of motivation since around May. At some point, I started feeling completely drained because writing smut had become way too repetitive. I kept following the same pattern over and over again, and it just wasn't exciting anymore. In fact, that was when I seriously started thinking about going on hiatus, or even leaving Tumblr altogether. Because if the content that got the most recognition was no longer something I genuinely enjoyed writing, then... what was the point of continuing?
But... I'm kind of hyperactive when it comes to writing, and it's one of my biggest hobbies, so walking away from it isn't easy. It would feel like losing a part of who I am. I should also mention that there were people who genuinely made me want to leave this app... but I wasn't about to give them that satisfaction. So... instead of going on hiatus or quitting, I came up with the Sugar Talk Event. I figured that changing things up might be exactly what I needed.
So yeah, that's the real reason behind the Sugar Talk Event. Will I take a break once it's over? ...Maybe. Idk yet.
my heesngirl 🤍 i apologize for being so late. i have not forgotten about you! i've been thinking of you this entire week, hehe. i hope your week has been going well! mine has been quiet, but it's about to get a little hectic next week, ah
i can't wait for your next sugar talk update! i am so obsessed with hee fluff now, literally just because of you! i love you so very much and i hope the weekend does you well! may all of your upcoming tasks bring you joy and pride whenever you complete them. i hope the people around you will be a little kinder too! all the best with the projects you have planned ahead 🤍
— 💌 anon
I'm definitely not lying when I say your messages always lift my spirits. 💕
I've honestly been in such a weird mood these past few days (maybe because I'm PMS-ing... idk 😭). It's also been one of those strange phases where, technically, nothing is wrong, but nothing really feels right either. It's been emotionally exhausting, ngl. But oh well... adulthood is stressful by nature. At least this week is finally over, so here's hoping the next one will be a little easier.
Anyway, enough about me. Let's talk about what really matters: you ♡ How have you been? How's everything on your end? I really hope everything's been going wonderfully for you, and that this week and everything you've had to deal with hasn't been too exhausting or taken a toll on your mood. I always like knowing you're doing well. And of course, like I've said before, your weekly appearance is always so, so welcome. It's honestly one of the things I look forward to the most. 🤭💕
As for the Sugar Talk Event... I'm getting through it little by little. I have to admit, I didn't have much faith in doing this event at first. The difference between the support this kind of content gets compared to smut is honestly huge. Although... after seeing a few other cases, I think it's just that overall engagement has been pretty low lately. I'm trying not to let it discourage me, and at the same time, not to put too much pressure on myself or expect too much from this At the end of the day, this is a hobby, not a full-time job.
Anyway... it always makes me happy to see you around. You've truly earned a very special place in my heart, and I care about you so much. Like I've said before, every message you send genuinely brightens my day. Thank you for always thinking of me and for always stopping by. I love you so, so much. Have a wonderful weekend, sweetheart. 🫂💕
new theme is cute as FUCK (i apologize for the violent way in which i stated this)
Oh, well... thank you, babe~ You always flatter me with your comments. 💕 And about the other thing... I believe everyone expresses themselves in their own way, and that's nice. (Also... let's just pretend this message wasn't sent during my "I-can't-decide-on-a-theme" phase, when I had a completely different theme than the current one... which I'll probably end up changing again soon) 😅
Just wanted to ask - for the sugar talk event, do you upload based on chronological order that the request was added, or for what gives u immediate inspiration?
That was actually my original plan to write them in chronological order, basically : first come, first served. But... it honestly depends on how much inspiration each request gives me. 🙃
i think, i think i'm catching you mid theme-change, but i'm not too sure 👁👄👁
Yup... you totally caught me 🤭 tbh... I really am that indecisive and constantly changing things up. Plus, even though I like green, it lowkey gives me the ick for some reason. So... that's why I'm doing another theme change 😅
It's funny reading this, especially because I'm so indecisive that I still haven't settled on a theme yet. At this rate, some of you are definitely going to catch me mid-theme change. 😭 (Don't judge me, I'm a Libra.)
hello!! this isn’t for sugar talk but i was wondering if there’s any topics that you DONT write for?? like boundaries yk, bc i have an idea for a request for sugar talk but i don’t want it to be something that you don’t write for, thank you !!🥹🤍
Oh, I genuinely appreciate whoever sent this question. Well... to be honest, as the requests for the Sugar Talk Event have been coming in, some of them have made me question whether I was actually clear enough with the event guidelines, or if I should've gone into more detail about the content restrictions. Even so, I did leave a few clarifications on the event cover page. But since the opportunity came up, I'd really like to expand a bit more on that point.
There are certain topics on Tumblr that can easily become controversial, and there are also topics that, personally, I don't think should be treated as if they're no big deal. One of the main ones is physical or sexual abuse. Even if the goal is to lead to a sweet reconciliation and a happy ending, I don't think it's right to normalize something like that, especially a man physically assaulting a woman, even if it's "just" a slap across the mouth or the threat of throwing a punch, or not consented acts. There really isn't any context in which I'd be comfortable writing about that.
There's also the topic of self-harm. Mental health isn't a taboo subject to me—not at all. But it is something very personal and delicate, especially because it's something I deal with myself. Because of that, topics this sensitive aren't something I'm willing to write about, especially since they could also create issues on the platform, with my audience, or even with people outside of it. I'd genuinely rather avoid handling subjects like that, for my own well-being.
There's also the topic of Hee leaving the group. I have no intention of creating content that could spark unnecessary controversy. The truth is, I don't have the patience to deal with pointless drama, and I do my best to stay away from it. Especially because I've already processed that situation in my own way, and I don't want to keep revisiting it or bring unnecessary conflict to my blog.
Any form of incest, even if it's meant to be completely soft or non-explicit, is also off the table.
And finally, toxic relationships that involve psychological harm. If the whole purpose of this event is to create a comforting and safe space, then I don't really see the point of writing about that kind of dynamic—even if it ends with a sweet reconciliation and healing. The only part I'd ever consider writing would be the post-healing stage itself.
And there may be other things, but we'll see as time goes on. For now, this is the most important point to highlight.
Okay, I thought about this a lot, so I’ll try to keep it short haha. Reader and Heeseung get home after a party. The main reason they leave early is because Heeseung is completely out of the world, but contrary to what everyone thinks, he’s incredibly clingy when he’s like this. He won’t stop telling the reader how much he loves her and how unbelievably beautiful she is. He even gets teary-eyed because he suddenly remembers that they’re in love and that he has the best girlfriend ever. When she tells him to take a shower, he pouts because he doesn’t want to be away from her, but eventually listens. Once he’s done and sees her already in bed, he immediately climbs on top of her, looking for cuddles and affection. She happily gives him exactly that—stroking his hair, holding him close, leaving soft kisses all over his face, and reminding him how much she loves him, how handsome he is, and how precious he is to her. In the end, Heeseung falls asleep peacefully in his favorite safe place: her arms :3
Tysm for sending in your request and being part of this event, sweetheart~ It was such a lovely idea to write, and I absolutely loved working on it! I really hope you love the final result. 🩷
The journey back home felt like they were floating in their own bubble, leaving behind the deafening noise of the party to delve into the tranquility of the streets illuminated by the city's headlights, which now felt so calm, as if there were only the two of you in the world. Heeseung, who throughout the night had maintained his usual reserved, quiet, and reserved posture in front of everyone else, seemed to have transformed into a completely different person the exact moment he buckled his seatbelt in the passenger seat.
"You know, I really can't believe it. How is it even possible that you're so, so beautiful? I spent the whole night looking at you, following you and thinking: 'This perfect girl… is my girlfriend.' God, I'm the luckiest man in the world. So much so that I can say many were envious of me, thinking they also want someone like you, but you're already with me, we belong to each other, and that's worth everything, baby. I really love having you with me, I don't think you can imagine how much." Heeseung murmured, dragging his words with such a pronounced pout that his lips looked adorable under the dim light of the dashboard. He turned his whole body toward you, resting his cheek against the seatback, and looked at you as if you were the only thing worthy of being seen.
You kept your hands steady on the wheel, trying to stay calm, but you couldn't help letting out a soft, low giggle, feeling your own cheeks warm under the effect his words caused. The couple of drinks you'd had at the party had left you in a subtly tipsy and relaxed state, enough for your heart to beat at double speed at your boyfriend's sincere ramblings.
"Stop looking at me like that, Hee. You're going to make me crash if you keep it up," you joked sweetly, giving him a quick sideways glance before returning your eyes to the road and continuing the drive. "By the way, even though you're this drunk, it doesn't change the fact that as soon as we walk through the apartment door, I'm putting you straight in the shower to sober you up a bit."
Heeseung's eyes widened, immediately looking at you with the remorseful expression of a scolded little boy who had just been threatened with an unfair punishment.
"No, I don't want to. Although… on one hand it's fine. Still, I'm going to shower because you're asking me to… but you better get in the shower with me. I don't want to be away from you, do you understand?" he protested in a low hiss, wrinkling his nose as he crossed his arms, though the effect of trying to look serious was completely lost due to the harmless shine in his eyes.
You let out another giggle, touched by his level of clinginess, and stretched a hand off the wheel to find his. Upon feeling your touch, Heeseung instantly intertwined his fingers with yours, bringing your hand to his lips to leave a prolonged kiss on your knuckles, and then began rubbing his cheek against the back of your hand, all without changing the pout for even a second as they entered the building's parking lot.
Once the engine was off, the real odyssey to get out of the vehicle began. Heeseung seemed to have almost completely lost his sense of gravity, so you quickly slid out of the driver's seat to go around the car and open his door. Carefully, you passed one of his arms over your shoulders and held him firmly by the side, leaning into his torso to secure your steps.
As soon as they started walking across the concrete of the parking lot, Heeseung turned the closeness into an absolute necessity. He wasn't content with just leaning on you: he rubbed his cheek slowly and lazily against your hair, as if he wanted to soak in your scent. He sought out the crook of your neck to release warm, humid breaths that made your skin tingle, and he let a large part of his weight fall on you, forcing you to stumble with every step. His hands, clumsy but insistent, moved up and down your waist, tugging at your clothes to pull you closer to his body, as if any millimeter of distance was unbearable torture.
"Hee, please, calm down a little, okay? Stop moving so much or we're really going to end up on the ground, I warn you," you pleaded between muffled laughs, making a tremendous effort to keep your balance under his constant assault.
"It's just… it's inevitable. It's just that I love you so much… I love you, I love you, I love you," he slurred in a hoarse, drawn-out voice, burying his nose deeper into your neck. He inhaled slowly, almost with devotion, and let out a shaky sigh that ran through you entirely. "Besides, you smell so good and I have you this close. Don't ask me for impossible things, darling."
You let out a small sound of resignation, managing to drag him to the elevator area. However, all hope of a quick and comfortable ride vanished the second your eyes landed on a bright orange cone and a sign that read: Out of service temporarily for maintenance. A sigh full of frustration escaped you as you stared at the damn sign before turning your head toward the heavy fire door.
"Well, we have no choice. We have to take the stairs, baby. Get ready," you said, adjusting your grip around him better. And so the real journey began.
Facing the steps with a Heeseung who could barely coordinate his own feet was already a heavy task, but dealing with the notable height difference between you two and his solid build turned it into a high-intensity workout. Each step required perfect synchronization: you pushing upward, holding his hip firmly, and him dragging his feet while his mind floated in a parallel universe of romance.
Halfway up the first flight, Heeseung suddenly stopped dead, forcing you to brake so he wouldn't fall backward. Then he turned his head toward you, stretching his lips into a demanding pout.
"Give me a kiss, baby. Just one and I swear I'll run up. I really want one of your kisses right now. It's been hours since the last one we shared, even at the party," he pleaded in a low whine, blinking slowly.
"No way, Lee Heeseung, we still have two floors to go and it'll definitely take time, so wait a little. I'll give you all the kisses you want, but once we're safely inside the apartment and you've taken a good shower. Now walk," you replied, breathing a little faster from the physical effort while fixing a messy strand of his hair.
"I don't want to wait that long, that's torture, love," he protested, and before you could react or tense up, he slipped off your shoulder to try to wrap you completely in a hug, at the same time blindly seeking your mouth.
The sudden shift in weight was lethal. Just as you had predicted minutes earlier, gravity took its toll instantly when your feet lost their grip on the edge of the step. In a blink of confusion and clumsiness, both of you ended up falling toward the landing of the stairs.
The dull impact against the floor knocked the breath out of you for a second, forcing you to close your eyes as you let out a groan. However, before you could process the hit, the silence of the place was interrupted by the sound of a hoarse and completely shameless laugh that vibrated directly against your chest. Heeseung had ended up on top of you, with his long legs tangled in yours and his arms braced on either side of your head, looking down at you with genuine, overwhelming, and beautiful happiness.
"I told you, Heeseung! You're the biggest fool!" you scolded him immediately, frowning as you placed your hands on his shoulders, pushing him in a useless attempt to get his more than six feet off you. "Get off, you're crushing me. See what happens when you don't listen?"
"I'm not getting off, beautiful. I'm not moving from here. This is my perfect opportunity and I'm not going to waste it… So now you have to give me my kisses," he countered in a slow murmur, dragging his words with a capricious pout. And instead of pulling away, he let his whole limp body fall onto yours, burying his face in the crook of your neck to breathe deeply.
"Don't be sneaky, Hee. We said the kisses would be upstairs, inside the apartment," you protested, though your voice softened completely and your hands stopped pushing him to start caressing the messy strands at his nape.
"But I can't wait, I really feel like I'm going to die if I don't kiss you right now," he exaggerated in a low whine, lifting his face from your neck to look at you. His eyes fixed on yours had an innocent shine, but loaded with such dense devotion that it caught the words and any protest you had in your throat. "Look at you… God, just look at you. How can you ask me to hold out for two full floors when you're this beautiful? How did I get so lucky? Tell me… How is it possible that you're mine?"
Before you could articulate a response to stop his cheesy outburst, Heeseung began to attack your face with desperate slowness, as if he needed to mark every inch of your skin. He left a wet, prolonged kiss on your left cheek, another right on the tip of your nose, and several more on your forehead, gently descending along your jaw while his large, warm hands clumsily rose to cradle your cheeks with extreme delicacy.
"I really love you so much, I love you too much, baby. You're the best girlfriend in the entire world, the most beautiful, the sweetest to me… I'm crazy about you, you know that? Completely obsessed, to the point where it scares me a little, because I've never felt this way with anyone, only with you. You're everything that's right, loving you does me good," Heeseung murmured against your lips, stopping just millimeters away from them, letting his warm breath brush against you. His voice suddenly became deeper, broken by exhaustion and by a feeling so pure that it squeezed your chest.
Suddenly he pulled away, though it was barely a few centimeters, and he was forcing you to hold his gaze. It was at that moment that your heart skipped a beat upon noticing the subtle change in his expression: his pupils were completely dilated, his lips trembled in an attempt at a smile, and his eyes had suddenly become watery, filling with heavy tears that threatened to slide down his cheeks at any moment. The barrier of his usual shyness and reserve had completely crumbled because of the alcohol, leaving exposed a vulnerable soul that felt overwhelmed by the simple fact of having you there.
"I can't imagine a life anymore where you're not with me. It would be a complete disaster without you. It's just that really… you're my everything, my safe place, my favorite person, with whom I can be myself and not fear being judged for it. Like I said, you're everything that's right, I really adore you. Never leave me, please," he continued in a broken thread of voice, blinking slowly while a rebellious tear finally slid from the corner of his eye.
Your warm and understanding hands immediately rose to cradle his face, resting on his cheeks as you looked at him with infinite tenderness. Feeling his vulnerability in that way, so exposed and surrendered to you, made your heart race, beating frantically. Because yes, he always found a way to express his love to you; he didn't need to be under the influence of alcohol to tell you how much he loves you and how much he likes you. But… this was definitely another level, a side of him that belonged only to you, and that he trusted you with blindly, knowing he was safe with you and only you.
"I love you too, Hee. I love you with the same intensity, do you hear me? You're everything to me too, my love. I'm the happiest woman in the entire universe since the very day you came into my life, you're everything that does me good. I can't imagine a life without you at this point either, so, all the more reason… I'm not going anywhere, I couldn't leave you that easily," you assured him in a whisper, sliding your thumbs to gently wipe away the tear that had escaped.
Heeseung didn't respond with words; instead, he let out a sigh and closed the distance to join his lips with yours. It was a slow, prolonged, and deep kiss, devoid of any rush. You savored each other with an almost palpable devotion, feeling the closeness of your breaths mixing together. You wrapped your arms around his neck, tangling your fingers in his hair, while he slid his large hands under your back, holding you against his body with protective firmness. In that instant, lying on the floor, they felt once again as if they were only the two of them against the rest of the world at those early morning hours.
After a while, they slowly pulled apart, their lips still touching in one last satisfying brush. And at that same moment, you softly caressed the nape of his neck.
"It's time now, baby. We really have to go up so we can rest properly," you whispered in his ear, giving him a couple of tender pats on the shoulder.
Heeseung looked at you fixedly for a couple of seconds, processing your words with a lazy smile that lit up his eyes. He leaned in to leave a sweet, loud kiss on your forehead before placing his hands on your sides to get up.
"Okay, you're right. Now I promise to be completely cooperative," he conceded in a thread of voice, extending his hand to help you up.
"You'd better," you laughed softly, accepting his help and planting one last quick peck on his lips to seal the promise.
The rest of the journey fortunately went by without any more issues. Keeping his word, Heeseung made an effort to coordinate his steps better, and both of you climbed the remaining stairs with extreme care until finally, the key turned in the lock and you entered the safety of your home.
Straight from the entryway, you headed to the bathroom, and he barely gave you the chance to take off your boots at the entrance. Since, just as he had begged so intensely, he took you with him and that's how you ended up getting into the shower together.
The contact of the warm water falling on their bodies and the familiar scent of the soap helped dissipate the dense fog of alcohol in Heeseung's head, giving him back a bit of sanity, although it didn't remove even a bit of his clingy attitude, because even there in that space, his closeness didn't cease, his need to keep you near was still there, in the way he held you against his chest, in how he washed your body and also let you wash his. His lips kept finding you, leaving sweet and prolonged kisses on yours, or on any corner of your body he could reach. He was so devoted and adorable that you couldn't even push him away; you didn't want to.
Eventually, both of you got out of the shower, and then out of the bathroom, wrapped in towels. Once outside, he veered off to the opposite side of the hallway, lazily dragging his feet toward the kitchen to pour himself a glass of cold water, while you went ahead to the shared bedroom.
A minute later, the bedroom door opened with an almost imperceptible creak. Heeseung entered just as you were finishing putting on your underwear and one of his largest cotton t-shirts to sleep in. Seeing how the garment hung loosely on you, covering you down to your thighs, an extremely sweet smile drew on his lips. Without saying anything, he proceeded to get dressed at the foot of the bed, putting on only some comfortable boxers.
You slipped under the sheets first, arranging the pillows, and Heeseung got in right after. True to his need for contact, he didn't look for his side of the bed; instead, he immediately crawled toward you and let his body fall against yours, settling on your chest almost in the same way they had been lying on the staircase floor a while ago.
You let out a sigh of satisfaction, wrapping your arms around him while your fingers naturally sank into his still slightly damp hair, starting to pamper him. Seeking your warmth, he left a soft kiss on your neck before completely burying his face in that area, breathing in your scent.
"I'm sorry…" he murmured with his voice muffled against your skin, his slurred voice betraying that exhaustion was finally winning the battle. "Forgive me for my behavior a while ago, I was a fool on the stairs."
"Don't worry about that, my love," you responded with tenderness, leaving a kiss on the top of his head while continuing your caresses. "The last thing you need to apologize in this life is for being so cute and affectionate with me. I love that you can talk freely about how you feel."
Heeseung let out a long sigh, relaxing every muscle in his back under your touch, feeling completely safe in his favorite place in the world.
"It wasn't a lie… Not a single one of my words. You really are my everything. I love you…" he slurred almost inaudibly, his words turning into a blurry murmur as sleep completely claimed him on top of you.
You smiled in the dim light, your heart so full it almost hurt. Your fingers continued sliding slowly through his hair, in a calm and protective rhythm, while you held him a little tighter against your chest, as if you wanted to merge him with your own skin. You leaned in gently and placed a long, reverent kiss on his bare shoulder, inhaling his warm and familiar scent. Then you stayed there, still, just listening to the beat of his heart, feeling the soft rise and fall of his breathing, deep and calm. Confirming that he had already surrendered to sleep.
"I love you too, my Hee," you whispered in his ear with infinite devotion, closing your own eyes to let yourself be carried away by sleep, wrapped in his weight and comforting warmth.
There’s something I want to break down : Why is the term "solo-stan" still being used as an insult? Especially now, when people are using it to describe those who keep fucking around with the same old shit and throwing hate at Jungwon, ENHA or Heeseung over what recently happened.
If you actually think about it logically, that doesn't even qualify as being a "solo-stan."Because... Heeseung is officially a solo artist, and it is completely valid that some people chose to carry on being fans of only EVAN (the EVERs), just like there are the EVERGENEs, who are the group that keeps supporting ENHA while supporting Hee at the same time. Everything is clear and respectable up to that point.
But this is where I emphasize my point: "solo-stan" cannot be the term used for that kind of people. At the end of the day, their attitude shows they aren't supporting ENHA, and they aren't supporting Hee either. Trying to drag him back to the group or claiming that "he is going to come back at any moment" isn't actual support; it’s just projecting their own selfishness and trying to impose their will over reality.
Literally, these are the comments they leave on Hee's TikToks :
So, I want you to tell me: Is that what you call being a "solo-stan"? Harassing Heeseung over the exact same topic... Do you honestly think that counts as real support? On top of that, people are trying to force him to give explanations just because they can't respect what he made perfectly clear in his letter, a statement he constantly backs up with his actions, proving to us every single day that he is doing exactly what he wanted to do.
Those who keep claiming he was kicked out of the group... it really shows they know absolutely nothing about Jessica Jung's case.
You can't just claim that only ENHA gets the worst of it either, because this isn't a competition to see who receives more hate. If both ENHA and Hee continue to receive love, it's because of the people who genuinely love both artists. The hate has hit both sides. Just as there are bitter engenes criticizing ENHA, there are also those labeling Heeseung as a traitor or a deserter, wishing the absolute worst on him to this day. Every time salt is poured into the wound, the hate flares up for both sides. Look at both sides of the coin, please.
Honestly... the problem here will always be either the fandom or the agency, one, the other, or both at the same time. And going back to the topic of Jungwon's live and what comes after :
"No, I just can't go on like this, it hurts me too much, I don't feel good, I don't like it this way. I can't look at them if they aren't seven; unfortunately, I'll have to leave the fandom. It was nice while it lasted, but it's just too hard FOR ME to carry on being an Engene".
... Yes, that is exactly how ridiculous those people sound. Their main-character syndrome makes them believe that their presence or absence in the fandom, or their lack of actual support and common sense, has any sort of real impact on this situation. Because literally, from the very beginning, everything has been and continues to be "me, me, me, and me." It’s no coincidence that Naver Korea published an article about how stupid this battle of egos is; literally a battle where these "fans" don't even care about the artist, but only about having their own demands met.
The scale of this situation is unbelievable, and it shows how out of touch these people really are. Seeing people do this, along with even more ridiculous things like tearing up Jungwon's or other ENHYPEN members' photocards while throwing hate at them, doesn't actually make the group look bad. It just makes the fans look foolish for thinking this will change anything. Like: the money you spent isn't being refunded, and once your tantrum is over, the things you broke aren't getting replaced. Besides, ENHA isn't going to stop doing what they're doing just because some people lack the capacity to understand basic respect, or because they can't let go of the illusion that they control the situation and will get what they want by acting out.
This conflict isn't going to end easily, because there are people completely disregarding Jungwon's words, prioritizing their own feelings above everything else. That is largely what triggered this entire mess and what will keep fueling it, at least until they decide to stop being so ridiculous and finally accept that the only ones who matter here are ENHA and Heeseung. Not the fandom. Because demanding that they give explanations... is just a complete waste of time. None of the guys are under any obligation to overexplain absolutely anything just to please everyone else. Especially not after all the proof they’ve shown, which speaks much louder than words.
Okay, I thought about this a lot, so I’ll try to keep it short haha. Reader and Heeseung get home after a party. The main reason they leave early is because Heeseung is completely out of the world, but contrary to what everyone thinks, he’s incredibly clingy when he’s like this. He won’t stop telling the reader how much he loves her and how unbelievably beautiful she is. He even gets teary-eyed because he suddenly remembers that they’re in love and that he has the best girlfriend ever. When she tells him to take a shower, he pouts because he doesn’t want to be away from her, but eventually listens. Once he’s done and sees her already in bed, he immediately climbs on top of her, looking for cuddles and affection. She happily gives him exactly that—stroking his hair, holding him close, leaving soft kisses all over his face, and reminding him how much she loves him, how handsome he is, and how precious he is to her. In the end, Heeseung falls asleep peacefully in his favorite safe place: her arms :3
Tysm for sending in your request and being part of this event, sweetheart~ It was such a lovely idea to write, and I absolutely loved working on it! I really hope you love the final result. 🩷
The journey back home felt like they were floating in their own bubble, leaving behind the deafening noise of the party to delve into the tranquility of the streets illuminated by the city's headlights, which now felt so calm, as if there were only the two of you in the world. Heeseung, who throughout the night had maintained his usual reserved, quiet, and reserved posture in front of everyone else, seemed to have transformed into a completely different person the exact moment he buckled his seatbelt in the passenger seat.
"You know, I really can't believe it. How is it even possible that you're so, so beautiful? I spent the whole night looking at you, following you and thinking: 'This perfect girl… is my girlfriend.' God, I'm the luckiest man in the world. So much so that I can say many were envious of me, thinking they also want someone like you, but you're already with me, we belong to each other, and that's worth everything, baby. I really love having you with me, I don't think you can imagine how much." Heeseung murmured, dragging his words with such a pronounced pout that his lips looked adorable under the dim light of the dashboard. He turned his whole body toward you, resting his cheek against the seatback, and looked at you as if you were the only thing worthy of being seen.
You kept your hands steady on the wheel, trying to stay calm, but you couldn't help letting out a soft, low giggle, feeling your own cheeks warm under the effect his words caused. The couple of drinks you'd had at the party had left you in a subtly tipsy and relaxed state, enough for your heart to beat at double speed at your boyfriend's sincere ramblings.
"Stop looking at me like that, Hee. You're going to make me crash if you keep it up," you joked sweetly, giving him a quick sideways glance before returning your eyes to the road and continuing the drive. "By the way, even though you're this drunk, it doesn't change the fact that as soon as we walk through the apartment door, I'm putting you straight in the shower to sober you up a bit."
Heeseung's eyes widened, immediately looking at you with the remorseful expression of a scolded little boy who had just been threatened with an unfair punishment.
"No, I don't want to. Although… on one hand it's fine. Still, I'm going to shower because you're asking me to… but you better get in the shower with me. I don't want to be away from you, do you understand?" he protested in a low hiss, wrinkling his nose as he crossed his arms, though the effect of trying to look serious was completely lost due to the harmless shine in his eyes.
You let out another giggle, touched by his level of clinginess, and stretched a hand off the wheel to find his. Upon feeling your touch, Heeseung instantly intertwined his fingers with yours, bringing your hand to his lips to leave a prolonged kiss on your knuckles, and then began rubbing his cheek against the back of your hand, all without changing the pout for even a second as they entered the building's parking lot.
Once the engine was off, the real odyssey to get out of the vehicle began. Heeseung seemed to have almost completely lost his sense of gravity, so you quickly slid out of the driver's seat to go around the car and open his door. Carefully, you passed one of his arms over your shoulders and held him firmly by the side, leaning into his torso to secure your steps.
As soon as they started walking across the concrete of the parking lot, Heeseung turned the closeness into an absolute necessity. He wasn't content with just leaning on you: he rubbed his cheek slowly and lazily against your hair, as if he wanted to soak in your scent. He sought out the crook of your neck to release warm, humid breaths that made your skin tingle, and he let a large part of his weight fall on you, forcing you to stumble with every step. His hands, clumsy but insistent, moved up and down your waist, tugging at your clothes to pull you closer to his body, as if any millimeter of distance was unbearable torture.
"Hee, please, calm down a little, okay? Stop moving so much or we're really going to end up on the ground, I warn you," you pleaded between muffled laughs, making a tremendous effort to keep your balance under his constant assault.
"It's just… it's inevitable. It's just that I love you so much… I love you, I love you, I love you," he slurred in a hoarse, drawn-out voice, burying his nose deeper into your neck. He inhaled slowly, almost with devotion, and let out a shaky sigh that ran through you entirely. "Besides, you smell so good and I have you this close. Don't ask me for impossible things, darling."
You let out a small sound of resignation, managing to drag him to the elevator area. However, all hope of a quick and comfortable ride vanished the second your eyes landed on a bright orange cone and a sign that read: Out of service temporarily for maintenance. A sigh full of frustration escaped you as you stared at the damn sign before turning your head toward the heavy fire door.
"Well, we have no choice. We have to take the stairs, baby. Get ready," you said, adjusting your grip around him better. And so the real journey began.
Facing the steps with a Heeseung who could barely coordinate his own feet was already a heavy task, but dealing with the notable height difference between you two and his solid build turned it into a high-intensity workout. Each step required perfect synchronization: you pushing upward, holding his hip firmly, and him dragging his feet while his mind floated in a parallel universe of romance.
Halfway up the first flight, Heeseung suddenly stopped dead, forcing you to brake so he wouldn't fall backward. Then he turned his head toward you, stretching his lips into a demanding pout.
"Give me a kiss, baby. Just one and I swear I'll run up. I really want one of your kisses right now. It's been hours since the last one we shared, even at the party," he pleaded in a low whine, blinking slowly.
"No way, Lee Heeseung, we still have two floors to go and it'll definitely take time, so wait a little. I'll give you all the kisses you want, but once we're safely inside the apartment and you've taken a good shower. Now walk," you replied, breathing a little faster from the physical effort while fixing a messy strand of his hair.
"I don't want to wait that long, that's torture, love," he protested, and before you could react or tense up, he slipped off your shoulder to try to wrap you completely in a hug, at the same time blindly seeking your mouth.
The sudden shift in weight was lethal. Just as you had predicted minutes earlier, gravity took its toll instantly when your feet lost their grip on the edge of the step. In a blink of confusion and clumsiness, both of you ended up falling toward the landing of the stairs.
The dull impact against the floor knocked the breath out of you for a second, forcing you to close your eyes as you let out a groan. However, before you could process the hit, the silence of the place was interrupted by the sound of a hoarse and completely shameless laugh that vibrated directly against your chest. Heeseung had ended up on top of you, with his long legs tangled in yours and his arms braced on either side of your head, looking down at you with genuine, overwhelming, and beautiful happiness.
"I told you, Heeseung! You're the biggest fool!" you scolded him immediately, frowning as you placed your hands on his shoulders, pushing him in a useless attempt to get his more than six feet off you. "Get off, you're crushing me. See what happens when you don't listen?"
"I'm not getting off, beautiful. I'm not moving from here. This is my perfect opportunity and I'm not going to waste it… So now you have to give me my kisses," he countered in a slow murmur, dragging his words with a capricious pout. And instead of pulling away, he let his whole limp body fall onto yours, burying his face in the crook of your neck to breathe deeply.
"Don't be sneaky, Hee. We said the kisses would be upstairs, inside the apartment," you protested, though your voice softened completely and your hands stopped pushing him to start caressing the messy strands at his nape.
"But I can't wait, I really feel like I'm going to die if I don't kiss you right now," he exaggerated in a low whine, lifting his face from your neck to look at you. His eyes fixed on yours had an innocent shine, but loaded with such dense devotion that it caught the words and any protest you had in your throat. "Look at you… God, just look at you. How can you ask me to hold out for two full floors when you're this beautiful? How did I get so lucky? Tell me… How is it possible that you're mine?"
Before you could articulate a response to stop his cheesy outburst, Heeseung began to attack your face with desperate slowness, as if he needed to mark every inch of your skin. He left a wet, prolonged kiss on your left cheek, another right on the tip of your nose, and several more on your forehead, gently descending along your jaw while his large, warm hands clumsily rose to cradle your cheeks with extreme delicacy.
"I really love you so much, I love you too much, baby. You're the best girlfriend in the entire world, the most beautiful, the sweetest to me… I'm crazy about you, you know that? Completely obsessed, to the point where it scares me a little, because I've never felt this way with anyone, only with you. You're everything that's right, loving you does me good," Heeseung murmured against your lips, stopping just millimeters away from them, letting his warm breath brush against you. His voice suddenly became deeper, broken by exhaustion and by a feeling so pure that it squeezed your chest.
Suddenly he pulled away, though it was barely a few centimeters, and he was forcing you to hold his gaze. It was at that moment that your heart skipped a beat upon noticing the subtle change in his expression: his pupils were completely dilated, his lips trembled in an attempt at a smile, and his eyes had suddenly become watery, filling with heavy tears that threatened to slide down his cheeks at any moment. The barrier of his usual shyness and reserve had completely crumbled because of the alcohol, leaving exposed a vulnerable soul that felt overwhelmed by the simple fact of having you there.
"I can't imagine a life anymore where you're not with me. It would be a complete disaster without you. It's just that really… you're my everything, my safe place, my favorite person, with whom I can be myself and not fear being judged for it. Like I said, you're everything that's right, I really adore you. Never leave me, please," he continued in a broken thread of voice, blinking slowly while a rebellious tear finally slid from the corner of his eye.
Your warm and understanding hands immediately rose to cradle his face, resting on his cheeks as you looked at him with infinite tenderness. Feeling his vulnerability in that way, so exposed and surrendered to you, made your heart race, beating frantically. Because yes, he always found a way to express his love to you; he didn't need to be under the influence of alcohol to tell you how much he loves you and how much he likes you. But… this was definitely another level, a side of him that belonged only to you, and that he trusted you with blindly, knowing he was safe with you and only you.
"I love you too, Hee. I love you with the same intensity, do you hear me? You're everything to me too, my love. I'm the happiest woman in the entire universe since the very day you came into my life, you're everything that does me good. I can't imagine a life without you at this point either, so, all the more reason… I'm not going anywhere, I couldn't leave you that easily," you assured him in a whisper, sliding your thumbs to gently wipe away the tear that had escaped.
Heeseung didn't respond with words; instead, he let out a sigh and closed the distance to join his lips with yours. It was a slow, prolonged, and deep kiss, devoid of any rush. You savored each other with an almost palpable devotion, feeling the closeness of your breaths mixing together. You wrapped your arms around his neck, tangling your fingers in his hair, while he slid his large hands under your back, holding you against his body with protective firmness. In that instant, lying on the floor, they felt once again as if they were only the two of them against the rest of the world at those early morning hours.
After a while, they slowly pulled apart, their lips still touching in one last satisfying brush. And at that same moment, you softly caressed the nape of his neck.
"It's time now, baby. We really have to go up so we can rest properly," you whispered in his ear, giving him a couple of tender pats on the shoulder.
Heeseung looked at you fixedly for a couple of seconds, processing your words with a lazy smile that lit up his eyes. He leaned in to leave a sweet, loud kiss on your forehead before placing his hands on your sides to get up.
"Okay, you're right. Now I promise to be completely cooperative," he conceded in a thread of voice, extending his hand to help you up.
"You'd better," you laughed softly, accepting his help and planting one last quick peck on his lips to seal the promise.
The rest of the journey fortunately went by without any more issues. Keeping his word, Heeseung made an effort to coordinate his steps better, and both of you climbed the remaining stairs with extreme care until finally, the key turned in the lock and you entered the safety of your home.
Straight from the entryway, you headed to the bathroom, and he barely gave you the chance to take off your boots at the entrance. Since, just as he had begged so intensely, he took you with him and that's how you ended up getting into the shower together.
The contact of the warm water falling on their bodies and the familiar scent of the soap helped dissipate the dense fog of alcohol in Heeseung's head, giving him back a bit of sanity, although it didn't remove even a bit of his clingy attitude, because even there in that space, his closeness didn't cease, his need to keep you near was still there, in the way he held you against his chest, in how he washed your body and also let you wash his. His lips kept finding you, leaving sweet and prolonged kisses on yours, or on any corner of your body he could reach. He was so devoted and adorable that you couldn't even push him away; you didn't want to.
Eventually, both of you got out of the shower, and then out of the bathroom, wrapped in towels. Once outside, he veered off to the opposite side of the hallway, lazily dragging his feet toward the kitchen to pour himself a glass of cold water, while you went ahead to the shared bedroom.
A minute later, the bedroom door opened with an almost imperceptible creak. Heeseung entered just as you were finishing putting on your underwear and one of his largest cotton t-shirts to sleep in. Seeing how the garment hung loosely on you, covering you down to your thighs, an extremely sweet smile drew on his lips. Without saying anything, he proceeded to get dressed at the foot of the bed, putting on only some comfortable boxers.
You slipped under the sheets first, arranging the pillows, and Heeseung got in right after. True to his need for contact, he didn't look for his side of the bed; instead, he immediately crawled toward you and let his body fall against yours, settling on your chest almost in the same way they had been lying on the staircase floor a while ago.
You let out a sigh of satisfaction, wrapping your arms around him while your fingers naturally sank into his still slightly damp hair, starting to pamper him. Seeking your warmth, he left a soft kiss on your neck before completely burying his face in that area, breathing in your scent.
"I'm sorry…" he murmured with his voice muffled against your skin, his slurred voice betraying that exhaustion was finally winning the battle. "Forgive me for my behavior a while ago, I was a fool on the stairs."
"Don't worry about that, my love," you responded with tenderness, leaving a kiss on the top of his head while continuing your caresses. "The last thing you need to apologize in this life is for being so cute and affectionate with me. I love that you can talk freely about how you feel."
Heeseung let out a long sigh, relaxing every muscle in his back under your touch, feeling completely safe in his favorite place in the world.
"It wasn't a lie… Not a single one of my words. You really are my everything. I love you…" he slurred almost inaudibly, his words turning into a blurry murmur as sleep completely claimed him on top of you.
You smiled in the dim light, your heart so full it almost hurt. Your fingers continued sliding slowly through his hair, in a calm and protective rhythm, while you held him a little tighter against your chest, as if you wanted to merge him with your own skin. You leaned in gently and placed a long, reverent kiss on his bare shoulder, inhaling his warm and familiar scent. Then you stayed there, still, just listening to the beat of his heart, feeling the soft rise and fall of his breathing, deep and calm. Confirming that he had already surrendered to sleep.
"I love you too, my Hee," you whispered in his ear with infinite devotion, closing your own eyes to let yourself be carried away by sleep, wrapped in his weight and comforting warmth.
i honestly love your aesthetics and your works a lot darling, keep going and doing what you love<3 im a biggg ever and writer myself it’s really nice discovering you🫶🏻🫶🏻 looking forward to more of your works!!!
Oh~ I'm honestly really flattered to read something like this. It feels so nice to be appreciated for both my aesthetics and my writing. 🥹 I'm really happy you genuinely enjoy them, and I truly appreciate the compliment. Thank you so much. 💕
Hola🥰🥰 , im kinda learning spanish and would love to hear some advice from you and if you know someone who learned Spanish maybe u can share it with me
Muchos gracias ☺️
It's kinda funny... but I actually speak Spanish... it's my first language. 😅 So .. First of all, thank you so much for reaching out, and honestly, that’s so exciting!
If I could give you any advice, it would definitely be these few things that make the whole process feel less like studying and more like just living the language. Dive into your own interests. Don't waste your time memorizing boring grammar lists or random vocabulary you'll never use. Look up things you already love, and try to consume content about that in Spanish. If you’re into the aesthetics of it or a specific hobby, learn the words for that. It sticks so much faster when you actually care about the topic.
Immerse yourself without leaving your room. Like... Switch your phone’s language to Spanish, put on Spanish music in the background while you do chores, or watch your favorite comfort show with Spanish dubs or subtitles. Getting your brain used to the rhythm and melody of the language is half the battle. You could use the he 15-minute rule. Consistency always wins over intensity. It’s a million times better to spend 15 minutes a day just scrolling through a Spanish page or listening to a short podcast than trying to cram for two hours once a week.
Talk to yourself. It sounds silly, but just narrating what you’re doing around the house in Spanish ("ahora estoy haciendo café") helps your brain start thinking in the language without the pressure of having another person judging your grammar. Be kind to yourself with mistakes. Spanish has a lot of rules, conjugations, and nuances. You will mix up genders, and you will forget verbs, and that is completely fine! The goal is connection, not perfection.
hello, my love! i don't know if my previous ask (which was a response to your response of another previous ask) came through last week. i tend to click the back button before clicking the ask button and usually screenshot my asks before exiting the page. i didn't screenshot my last ask to resend it and now i'm wondering if i clicked back before sending the ask lol 🙈
nevertheless! i am loving the sugar talk fics! hee fluff is exactly what we need right now, given the chaos taking place in this fandom as of recent, once again! i hope you've had the most fantabulous week! i hope that things have been looking up for you and that you feel lighter! i love and appreciate you so much! 🤍
— 💌 anon
Oh~ there's my darling! was already missing you a lot 😊
About what you mentioned... I did see your previous reply, but it completely slipped my mind to answer it. I'm sorry about that. It ended up getting buried under all the Sugar Talk event requests, and I was actually planning to reply once I posted my next update. Honestly, I wasn't even planning to be active until the weekend... but then what happened a few hours ago happened, and I just couldn't help talking about it. My attempt to keep everyone waiting until the next update totally flopped 😅 lol
But here I am! And I'm really, really happy you showed up. I was honestly starting to worry you wouldn't. The second I saw your message, though, I got so excited knowing you were here!
Anyway... how was your week, baby? I really hope everything went well for you and that you didn't have to deal with any major stress or complications. More than anything, I hope you've been doing really, really well. I also hope you have a lovely weekend and get plenty of rest. Sending you lots of kisses, the biggest hug, and an extra, extra big dose of love. Love u so much, babe! 🫂💕
I think the way jw spoke what he said and how he reacted were all a bit rude
What is actually rude is that you and many others think it’s wrong for a human being, who is also an adult with full autonomy, to set clear boundaries and finally speak up to demand the respect that he and his group deserve, thereby putting an end to the toxic, and delusional behaviors that many have had and continue to exhibit.
