panel. in manga art, panels refers to the frame that wraps around one moment in time.
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an original Haikyū AU pairing Udai Tenma (the og little giant)
warning!!: containing some manga content.
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Miyagi Prefecture, Nine years ago
“Be careful. Really, be careful, Sasaki. It’s very dark inside.” The class rep. warned, looking worried.
Tsubasa smiled, “Alright. I’m okay.”
As the class rep. said, it was quite dark inside the storage room. Tsubasa entered with very careful steps while muttering to herself, “Why didn’t they just buy another lamp for this room?”
With light peeking in from the vents, the storage room was still pitch black. Tsubasa could barely see anything, not to mention the pile of mats that almost blocked her visibility. She had to be extra careful not to break anything there.
“Yosh... yosh... where should I put this anyway?”
Painstakingly casting her eyes around, Tsubasa searched around for the last place the class rep. had put the things she had brought with her earlier. Unable to see anything so clearly, Tsubasa sighed. “Mah... It’s not that anybody can’t rearrange this, right?”
She decided to put the mats down somewhere empty and started walking. One, two, and three cautious steps, hoping that everything went smoothly until the end.
However, bad luck befell her when her foot hit something hard on the floor.
Tsubasa blinked in confusion as she found herself falling forward. She tried to regain her balance, but it was too late. The mats she had been carrying with her fell onto the ground with a loud thud. She winced as she felt the impact of the fall on her knees.
As she tried to pick herself up, she realized that something else had fallen as well. Metal poles clattered on the ground, dangerously close to her face.
But then, from out of nowhere, a strong hand reached out and caught the falling poles.
Her body closing in automatically, her eyes closed to endure the intensity of the loud clattering iron poles. Slowly after the sound disappeared, Tsubasa soon realized that someone had been there with her. She raised her head almost immediately, then felt that she had hit something hard which was followed by a groan.
Dimly from the small light shining into the storage room from the vents, Tsubasa could see a boy covering his nose with his hand, remembering that he had been the one who had bumped into him.
Panicking, Tsubasa reached out, “Are you okay?”
Sending Tsubasa’s touch on his arm, the boy pulled himself up, getting to his feet.
It was as the boy stood before her that, with enough light, Tsubasa could finally get a better look at who the boy was. The unexpected, “Giant Senpai?”
Udai frowned, slowly lowering his hand from his nose as he scrutinized the girl before him.
“What are you doing here?” She asked.
Someone had just rushed in from the entrance, probably the class rep.
Tsubasa turned to the class rep who was standing in front of the storage room entrance.
The class rep. rushed to Tsubasa who immediately helped herself to get up. Her eyes briefly swept over Udai’s figure which was almost a shadow form in the lack of lighting before returning to Tsubasa.
Tsubasa nodded, “hm. I’m okay.”
She immediately turned to the side when she saw Udai walk away.
She heard the class rep’s question, but her eyes focused on Udai who had just disappeared from the storage room door, catching a glimpse of his face.
“Your hand? Your head? Did you hurt something?”
Tsubasa turned back to the class rep. who was frantically checking her body.
“Oh, I’m alright, Ishikawa-chan!” She said, smiling. “There’s no need to worry. More than that, you should also be careful not to slip between these rods. It’s dangerous.”
********************************************************
Over at the lockers, Tsubasa was trying to focus on getting ready for her next class. But her mind kept circling back to what happened in the storage room.
Tsubasa was pretty sure that with what happened—with how Udai was there to prevent the metal columns from falling on him—Udai couldn’t possibly be alright, right? Technically, he was there to ward off the metal rods before they could fall on her vulnerable body, though the thing about how he knew precisely where she was in the middle of that dark room was still a mystery. And whether it was his shoulder, his arm, or perhaps somewhere on his face, Tsubasa swore she heard a thump before the clattering sound rang.
There was no way he was going to be okay after those heavy metal poles fell on him, and if it was true and something did happen to him, Tsubasa wouldn’t be able to shake the guilt.
Walking hand in hand with her friends to go to the next class, Tsubasa’s mind was constantly occupied by simulations of the previous incident and what might have happened to Udai. If his hand was injured because of the incident, then of course it would be a big problem.
We’re talking about a very important player in the Karasuno volleyball team here.
If something really happened to his hand then Tsubasa would—
Her steps halted midway, stopping the amused laughter of the other girls who were two steps ahead of her. Puzzled, they simultaneously turned.
“Did you forget something?”
Tsubasa then said, “Sorry, you guys can go ahead.”
Tsubasa no longer paid attention to her friends calling out to her to ask in which seat she wanted to sit in this class. Tsubasa just gave a perfunctory answer as she ran out of the corridor.
********************************************************
Udai opened the toilet door quietly, gradually feeling the pain in his wrist as he turned the door knob. Entering the toilet, he took a quick look at his wrist and then went to turn on the water faucet.
While washing his hands and washing his face, Udai realized that his wrist wasn’t okay after what happened in the storage room.
He had been so kind as to make his body a shield for the girl who was almost crushed by the iron poles of the volleyball club net. In hindsight, it was a short-sighted decision. Why would he throw his body there and suddenly become a hero in someone’s story? Now, as for the result of his stupid decision, he had to figure out how to make it to the afternoon practice without making any ruckus for hurting his wrist.
The team has a practice match scheduled with Ouginishi High School next week. If he ditched practice, their super strict coach would not hesitate to replace him with another third-year or first-year left wing-spiker and that’ll be no good for him.
Udai decided to take care of his wrist after class ended. First of all, for now, he had to hurry up for the next class.
He washed his face once more, ignoring the pain in his wrist.
From time to time, Udai glanced at his wrist, making sure that there were no bruises evident for now. Then, after wiping his face, Udai stretched his wrist: twisting it slowly or moving it back and forth while slightly frowning if it felt sore.
He had the time to brave from the impact with the poles just enough. There will be nothing serious about his wrist. An elastic bandage and proper care would do for this kind of minor injury.
Udai left the restroom with a leisurely pace towards class, passing through a fairly quiet corridor with only a few second-years passing by on their way to their respective classes.
He didn’t expect anything as he walked down the corridor to his next class. All he could think about was his next class and that it was chemistry, so perhaps, they would be working on something in groups.
He really didn’t expect anything, let alone a loud call that made his body twitch in shock as his steps halted midway.
Udai didn’t want to guess, but as he recalled, there were only a really few people who would call him in that way and the first one that came to mind was an underclassman with particularly brown hair. Then when he looked back, fate answered him by presenting her at the end of the corridor.
There stood a girl he knew at the end of the corridor, returning his gaze. It was as if she was running, her breathing was a little ragged before she was able to manage a slight bow to greet him. Then, without any formal words or some pleasantries, she rushed over to him.
Standing before him was, yet again, Sasaki Tsubasa.
Udai was still registering what was happening and trying to project what would happen after this, but then she was right there before him, closer than she was some seconds before. His eyes caught how her eyes traced him as if she was scanning his body so casually.
Before Udai could reprimand her about her impoliteness, to his face, she had lifted a plastic bag containing a faint hint of several things that he also hadn’t had quite a good look at because she was fast to pull it back then said, “Just in case,”
Before he could process a response, Tsubasa had slipped her hand between the strap of his bag and pulled him out of the corridor. He heard her say, “Come with me for a moment.”
********************************************************
Udai was someone content with solitude, comfortable with how things work on his own terms.
In his panels, he deliberately didn’t invite many people. There has always been only his own self, his weaknesses and strengths to be embraced and nurtured into a formidable weapon to fight against the unfairness of this world. The idea of opening up the access to connect with the people outside of his panel had never crossed his mind before, until there was someone who had the audacity to cross the line being uninvited.
Really, though, what’s with this continuous encounter with her?
He barely knew her, and yet she was acting as if they were close friends as she dragged him by the strap of his bag to the gymnasium and insisted on giving first aid to his injured wrist.
Well, he was grateful that an early first aid might have prevented the situation from worsening, but he also couldn’t say that he wasn’t uncomfortable being in this situation.
When was the last time he ever interacted with someone other than the club members or some classmates who was forced to be in the same group project with him and needed his help?
“I’m sorry, Senpai,” Tsubasa said suddenly, breaking the silence. “I feel really guilty about what happened in the storage room.”
Udai frowned. “Why should you feel guilty? It wasn’t your fault.”
“It was,” she said, “as… I was there, being careless, thinking that I can carry all the remaining mats at once, and that If I can carry all of them at once, it would make the work faster, and we would have finished earlier. It was my fault because I was impatient, rushing, and then because my feet bumped into something on the floor, I lose my balance then crashed those iron rods and then—”
“It wasn’t your fault that I was there.” Udai insisted, and started feeling a little restless for that long self-explanation just now.
“I know,” Tsubasa said, “But if it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t have gotten hurt.”
Udai shook his head. “It’s not your fault,” he repeated firmly. “I made the choice to jump in. That one’s on me, and I don’t regret it.”
Udai realized that Tsubasa had paused to stare at him while he made his point clear. His brow immediately furrowed, taking the situation in. He failed to say something as her eyes immediately shifted to his wrist that she was wrapping with an elastic bandage. Very quickly, as if she was not the one who had been watching him keenly just some moments before.
“Hee… Alright, then. I get it,”
“So, this was after all about pride, huh?”
Udai was not angry that what she said was not true. Udai felt annoyed and half embarrassed because thinking about it, the one before, he sounded like he was defending his pride whole-heartedly. Unwilling to budge and being so firm in his own stance... not to mention the words I don’t regret it.
What’s with that I don’t regret it earlier? He regretted it, of course, since now his wrist was sore!
“But, it’s alright,” Tsubasa looked up at him, her eyes full of gratitude. “Thank you, Senpai.”
Udai felt like the world had been spinning in slow motion ever since his ears received that word of thanks. It wasn’t anything poetic or sweet, just a simple thank you.
For a moment, he pondered about it... about the warmth of connecting with others outside of his panel. About a forgotten warmth, which was reintroduced by this strange girl.
The only thing that gave her access to his panel was their switched cell phones, then the cookies, and this very storage room accident.
Udai didn’t even know her name, nor had he had the will to ask because he was previously convinced that this was just a flash contact. Yet with a simple thank you, he felt that just now, she was… really in.
For so long has been abandoning the idea of connecting with others outside of his panel, Udai had almost forgotten that it would feel this warm.
As Tsubasa continued to wrap the bandage around his wrist, she accidentally bumped her head into Udai's nose. He yelped in pain, clutching his nose with his free hand.
“Oh! Oh- I’m so sorry!” Tsubasa exclaimed, looking horrified. “Are you okay? Did I hurt your nose? Did it bleed?”
Udai frowned, his hand still holding his nose. “I’m fine.”
“Really?” She asked, still looking concerned.
Udai moved his hand from his nose, “Really. I’m really fine.”
Tsubasa sighed in relief, “Thank goodness I didn’t hurt you twice.”
Udai almost winced at her words, uncomfortable with the assertion that she was the one who hurt him. This time, however, he did not respond to that. Instead, his desire to quickly exclude himself grew, and he asked, “Are you done?”
Tsubasa shook her head, “No. Not yet.”
Udai didn’t say anything more after that, just casually handing his hand to her and letting her quickly finish wrapping the bandage around his wrist.
“Make sure you compress this with a warm water at home,”
“So, what are you doing in the storage room, Senpai?” Tsubasa asked.
There he goes. Another childish retort just like that time.
Udai knew how childish he sounded when he answered in that way, yet did it anyway.
“You’re right about that,” Tsubasa said, “but I’m just curious. I wonder, in such a dark room, what you would have been doing if you’d been there? I mean, it was almost pitch black right there, wasn’t it? Did you come to get something after our class was over? Or during the game? Oh? Or, have you been there since before our gym class even started?”
Udai sighed, “You’re not just curious when you’re asking so many questions at once.”
And he only realized that he had said something weird when he saw Tsubasa stop to stare, as if she was working hard to register his words.
He quickly shifted his gaze to his wrist, “Are you done now?”
Tsubasa also immediately returned, “Oh, right. I forgot. I’m sorry!”
Tsubasa however, unlike Udai, was not awkward as she returned to diligently wrapping the elastic bandage around his wrist. Unlike Udai, she was someone who was used to connecting with others. Unlike Udai’s deserted panel, hers was crowded with people reaching out to connect with her.
What could fate want from this continuous encounter?
Instead of that, perhaps today, he should give up on doing some technical drills.
********************************************************
Udai stood on the sidelines as the rest of the team started the afternoon practice session.
As expected, as soon as he arrived with a bandaged wrist, he was excluded from any technical drills.
“Did I miss an injury report?” Ukai Ikkei, their coach, asked.
Udai hesitated for a moment, then decided to come with something. “I hurt my wrist this morning.”
“Just an accident in the bathroom,” Udai lied.
Instead of telling the whole story about him suddenly becoming the hero in someone else’s terms that the super strict old man wouldn’t buy, lying about something that makes no sense would be ten times better.
Ukai Ikkei scowled, “And why didn’t you report this to me?”
“I’m sorry for not reporting.”
“If you still want to be a regular, you need to sit out these technical drills and do some extra physical training this afternoon. Understood?”
Udai nodded, feeling both embarrassed and grateful that there weren’t any more questions that followed.
He did more running and some physical training that did not involve his hands too much for a while whilst the rest of the team were up for a spike drill.
He could actually hit a few, but he knew it would only cause new problems for him later. For now, he was better off following the rules and staying in the safe lane.
There was still enough time to earn the starting spot for their upcoming practice match against Oiginishi High School. That was more than enough.
As the team took a break, Udai walked over to the bench to take his drink.
“What’s happened to your wrist, Udai-kun?” The first question and concern, expectedly came from Tsukishima Akiteru.
“Just an accident.” Udai answered subtly.
“What? Did you fall on your hand or something?” Then, their second-year middle blocker, Sakuma, chirped.
Udai then took another sip from his bottle and shifted his gaze to his wrist. Taking some moments to just stare then shifted to the storage room.
He absentmindedly rubbed his wrist, feeling the bandage press against his skin. He wondered if it was too tight, if it was causing more pain than it was helping, but no, it was alright.
Sasaski Tsubasa, now he knew her name.
Udai and Tsubasa made their way into the cozy coffee shop, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filling their nostrils. They found a secluded table in the corner, away from the hustle and bustle of the other customers.
As they sat down, the awkward silence descended upon them. Tsubasa fiddled with her hands, stealing glances at Udai from time to time, unsure of what to say. Udai, for his part, was trying his best to make the situation less tense.
They sat across from each other, sipping on their warm beverages. The atmosphere was awkward, silent.
Udai cleared his throat, breaking the awkward silence that hung between them. “So, um, how have you been?”
Tsubasa smiled faintly, “I’ve been doing well. How about you, Udai-san?”
“I’ve been busy with work,” Udai answered, taking a sip of his coffee awkwardly.
Silence fell between them again and Udai wondered if he had pushed his luck too far by asking her out for coffee. He had always been bad at reading the signs and he didn’t want to make things more awkward than they already were.
“So, about the little boy earlier,” Udai said, trying to make conversation. “It’s a good thing his father showed up before the police had to take him in.”
Tsubasa nodded, “Yes, I was worried for a moment there. But luckily, it all worked out.”
“Yeah,” Udai agreed, clearly relieved that he had managed to turn the conversation into a neutral topic. “The weather has been nice lately, hasn’t it?”
Tsubasa turned briefly, missing a beat then chuckled softly before answering, “Yes, it has. The days are getting shorter though, and it’s almost autumn.”
Udai felt a pang of guilt, realizing that he was the one who had ended things between them in the summer eight years ago.
He quickly cleared his throat and changed the topic again. “So, how’s work been for you?”
Tsubasa smiled, her eyes lighting up. “It’s been great, actually.”
Something was heavy on his tongue, a question that he really didn’t want to ask but thrashing to jump out from the tip of hos tongue. About something Hatakeyama Jiro had said the day before, about something that distracted him from time to time when he was working.
Udai didn't want to ask anything about it after Tsubasa said something about his work, underlining something about Hatakeyama Jiro that immediately discouraged him.
“As always, Hatakeyama is someone who is very reliable in everything about this job.”
He saw Tsubasa smile, “He’s not someone who can be said to be very good, however, in his work, he really pays attention to the little things. Three years of working in the same office, in the same department, I felt that I was always far behind and couldn’t help but continue to depend on him.”
“Mah…” Tsubasa chuckled, lifting her coffee cup once more, ready to take a sip. “As it should be, it’s something a Senpai should do.”
Udai felt annoyed at suddenly feeling uncomfortable after they entered this topic.
He heard Tsubasa put the cup back on the saucer. The clink was clear, as was Tsubasa’s voice that came with her sentence.
“Today, he must be struggling to do all his work and cover up for everything I should be doing.”
She giggled, then sighed, “Well... it’s not like I purposely didn’t want to work today.”
Right. Thinking about that, she should be working during this time.
Tsubasa’s question drew Udai’s gaze to her. He saw the way she was smiling.
“Like, why would an office worker like me wander around in casual clothes during work hours— like that. No?”
Oh. Right. He forgot. He should have asked, right?
“Ah… Well…” Udai paused, trailed over, missing the way Tsubasa stared at him in frown. “Well… why aren’t you working today?”
Tsubasa chuckled, “No, no. My bad.” she smiled, “I just haven’t felt well since yesterday after lunch.” glancing at Udai briefly, Tsubasa quickly added, “Don't worry, it’s clearly not about the octopus.”
About Tsubasa’s allergy, she had a pretty severe octopus allergy. She would develop a fairly high fever along with a pretty bad red rash on her face if she ever ate even a small portion of octopus. Sometime in the past, nine years ago, something similar happened and Tsubasa was also unable to go to school.
“I didn’t catch a fever,” she said, “I probably just experiencing a slight anemia from lack of rest. Also, about my lunch, strangely, they completely omitted octopus meat from the lunch menu that I always order.”
“I wondered if Hatakeyama went to say something to the chef.”
Udai still caught Tsubasa’s mutterings after that.
“Well... I’m sure it must have been him.” She added, “He probably got fed up with having to help me separate the octopus from my food several times.”
Udai’s mind wandered to imagine how Hatakeyama would do that for Tsubasa. He also unnecessarily thought about how they would spend lunch on normal days, on days when he wasn’t there to interrupt them.
In the middle of this hot summer, would Hatakeyama sit beside Tsubasa to from time to time wipe her forehead that might be sweating... or would he use the back of his hand to wipe her sweat... or something more romantic than what he could imagine.
Come to think of it, Udai was very good at ruining his own mood. He was like a pro at it.
“How about you, Udai-san?” Tsubasa’s voice broke his reverie.
His gaze returned to Tsubasa.
The smile that greeted him was a slight but sweet. The look in her eyes awaited his answer, contrasting with the confusion in his eyes.
Not letting the silence slip between them, Tsubasa added, “I certainly do not really understand how you do your job... However, I’m sure that even after all these years, filling each panel with interesting sketches is still not an easy thing to do, right?”
Udai’s heart was swelled by her words.
From the smile on her face, flashbacks of their summer past came back to him in a huge wave that instantly washed him away.
Udai was brought back to a time when summer was not just about the heat, but about the pink that colored all his senses. About pencils, papers, sketches, unprofessional panel lines roughly filling those old papers, and a presence that always ringed with laughter that carried away the weariness that crept into his bones.
The day he turned away from her presence at the end of that corridor, time had taken away all the pink that had once held him tightly.
Shaking off his sentimentality, Udai smiled, “Well... you know well enough about how hard it is.”
“My job…” Udai trailed off, thinking of something safer to say about this.
He didn’t want to later have to get even more sentimental than he was right now when he accidentally went too far and alluded to something that would rattle something from the past.
Then, he knew what to say.
“I just work hard to always meet my reader’s expectation, well… trying,” he nodded. “After all, in my terms as a mangaka, my readers are the life of my manga. If I can’t reach their expectation well in every volume, then it’s possible that production will come to a halt. And inevitably, the life that is unfolding within each panel will also be taken away.”
“Well... to keep that from happening, I worked hard. Also... well…”
A glimpse of someone he knew very well flashed before he continued.
“I also have someone who is very strict and always demanding a good story in each volume.”
Udai didn’t have time to glance at Tsubasa to study her expression.
“My editor is very strict,” he smiled, “but because he is very strict, I am always being saved in each of every volume. Indeed, sometimes, it only takes a little push in order to move forward.”
Udai only realized that what he said last time was something Tsubasa had said to him when he stopped and locked eyes with Tsubasa, when in her eyes there was warmth, familiarity, recognition, shrouded in surprise.
He had previously promised that he would try hard not to bring up anything from the past.
“Indeed.” Tsubasa responded with a smile.
Awkwardly, Udai immediately picked up his cup, taking another sip of his coffee in a bit of a hurry, hoping to swallow the awkwardness right away.
He thought of quickly shifting their conversation into a safer topic, however, he suddenly asked something stupid.
“Are you still reading manga?”
The question he had been desperately avoiding slipped out of his mouth.
Tsubasa was surprised to get that question— yeah, great. He had just made Tsubasa uncomfortable with his unnecessary, stupid question.
He heard Tsubasa sigh, “Well... Hatakeyama made that too clear the other day, didn’t he?” Then she smiled, “yeah, I read manga.”
He heard Tsubasa sigh, “Well... Hatakeyama made that too clear the other day, didn’t he?” Then she smiled, “yeah, I read manga.”
He missed a beat, “What… What kind of manga do you like to read?”
Tsubasa leaned forward, her expression brightening. “I like all kinds of manga, actually. From romance to action to horror. I think it’s important to have a well-rounded perspective on things.”
“Hatakeyama,” he heard Tsubasa sigh, as if almost wincing, “he’s always saying that manga is a childish hobby. Obviously doesn’t know how mangaka are all adults spending their time draining the best bubbles of their imagination to fill every panel with lifes that are ten times better than the ones in the real world. What’s wrong with adults reading manga? Everyone has the right to have a hobby! Whatever it is,”
He caught Tsubasa’s gaze returning to him after that.
“Udai-san, do you remember the other day?”
“When we were having lunch… a lunch before I spilled the ocha on your t-shirt— ah! I’m really terribly sorry about that!”
“Oh... it’s alright about that—“
“That day, you remember Hatakeyama saying that reading some manga is a childish hobby, right?”
“But after I introduced you to him formally that time, he started paying attention to the manga I was reading. He also started peeking at the manga I was reading a few times. I believe, after this, he will buy your manga immediately if he sees me reading it once again.”
He saw Tsubasa sigh, breaking into a warm smile afterward.
“Well… indeed,” her gaze returned to Udai, “I can feel how hard you work on each volume of your manga. Each time, it’s like a thrilling new adventure, it always feels like I’m exploring a new, big maze.”
“Good work, Udai Sensei!”
Tsubasa’s smile bloomed, sending warmth into his chest. Udai fidgeted, cursing. He shouldn’t be drowning into this atmosphere.
“Ah! I just bought the special edition of Zombie Knight last week via the website, so I couldn’t get an autograph. Can I get an exclusive autograph of the mangaka, perhaps? Well... since I technically missed the fansign...” Tsubasa shrugged.
Tsubasa chuckled. The ringing of her laughter was as clear as wind chimes greeting each other with the summer breeze.
“I’m joking!” She said, her hand naturally reaching for her cup, taking another sip of her coffee.
Udai heard her mumble something, but his mind was wandering, away on the fact that Tsubasa was reading his manga.
He wondered if she remembered that she was the one who gave him the idea to give life to this story between humans and zombies that he had brought so far, almost reaching its ending. He wondered if she read the manga with a glimmer of pride in her heart about that. In a way, Udai wanted her to read with pride knowing that there was a fragment of her mind in each panel. Maybe not as big as the part he gave birth to, but enough to drive the birth of millions of panels to this day.
Her voice broke Udai’s reverie once again. His eyes quickly returned to her, catching the way her eyes trailed.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you this,”
Udai felt nervous, somehow feeling that perhaps this time the question would be something heavy, which would make his mouth locked with hesitation to answer, because Tsubasa, uncharacteristically took a little too long to arrive at her question.
Every second wasted while she considered her words was like a hell of anxiety for Udai who waited uneasily.
Udai felt a knot form in his stomach.
Finally, she said, “Do you still play volleyball?”
The question that came was not something that would make his mouth lock with hesitation, or something that would make the world in his terms collapse instantly like what he feared so much.
The question that came was a common thing that every person from his past would ask him after a long time not seeing him.
“I don’t have much track of you since high school. The last thing I remember was The Spring Tournament.”
Udai felt guilt consume him at the memory. He had been a part of the team that had lost in the tournament, and he had let everyone down.
“Ah… It’s not that I am expecting to know such things about you. Just curious.”
Udai looked at her, eyes holding so many untold emotions.
“… Is the little giant still going on to the court sometimes to answer his nature— well… something like that.”
“Right… That Spring Tournament was the last, huh?”
He had quit volleyball soon after high school, unable to face the shame of his failure.
In the past, Udai was a star who was famous on the orange court.
The Little Giant, they called him.
He was a young crow who flew fearlessly through the sky with a strong wind blowing in his path.
Piling on his shoulders was pride, confidence and responsibility. Blooming inside of him was thirst and greed that eventually brought him down, slapping him with the bitter reality that there was a wall he could not climb. About the fact that perhaps, volleyball was not for him after all.
From his failure, not only did he want to run away from all those eyes that had watched every path that he once traced in his youth, more than them, he wanted to run away from her eyes. Because more than anything, her eyes were where he could shatter. But because of his pride and arrogance, he brushed it aside and turned his back on her.
He didn’t want to shatter before her, embarrassed and was too proud.
But now, there came a time when he finally had to be honest with his own feelings. At the very least, about how volleyball was no longer the air he breathed. About how volleyball was no longer the only wing that could make him fly high.
His smile unfolded, neither bitter nor regretful. Not even a speck of guilt about the past he had left behind, just an acceptance of the reality inside his panel.
Tsukishima Akiteru was set to lock the gymnasium as he was the last one to leave after the volleyball team’s practice.
As he was about to turn off the lights, he noticed a light flickering inside the storage room. Tsukishima was surprised, he didn’t know anyone was still inside.
He slowly walked towards the room, wondering who it could be, and heard the sound of someone moving things around. Tsukishima hesitated but didn’t want to scare whoever was inside. He slowly opened the door and saw Udai turning on the storage room lights and once again surprised him because now, the previously pitch-black room had become brighter with the lamp on.
“Oh? It’s fixed?” Tsukishima muttered.
His gaze shifted to Udai who was rearranging some mats that were not neatly arranged somewhere, combining them with some other equipment on the other side of the room.
“What are you doing here, Udai-kun?” Tsukishima asked.
Tsukishima frowned in confusion.
“You are to lock the gymnasium?” For a moment, Udai turned to him.
“Oh. Yeah.” Tsukishima nodded.
Udai then bowed his head before walking away, “Good job, Tsukishima-san.”
“O-oh… Good job, Udai-kun.”
Watching Udai waking out of the gymnasium, Tsukishima muttered in confusion. “What was that?”
His gaze returned to the storage room, to the now brightly lit lamp that he recalled was broken.
“Did he fix the lamp just now?”
********************************************************
A week had passed since the accident in the storage room of the gymnasium, and Tsubasa’s class had gym class that day.
As usual, they headed to the storage room to collect the mats they needed for their activities. As they approached, something caught their attention.
“Eh? The lamp is fixed now,” the class rep. said in surprise.
They looked around, and indeed, there was more light than the usual dimness. The lamp that had been broken for weeks was now fixed and shining brightly.
“Someone must have fixed it,” one of Tsubasa’s classmates said.
Tsubasa quietly observed from afar, looking at the now well-lit storage room.
She wondered somewhere, eyes trailing over to the entrance room, to someone.
********************************************************
Later that afternoon, Tsubasa’s friends were excitedly discussing the boys' volleyball team’s practice match against Ouginishi High School this very afternoon.
They were going on about how handsome the other team’s players were.
Tsubasa, however, was not interested in their chatter about the other team. Her mind wandered to someone else.
She silently made up her mind to watch the match. To see if he was taking part in this match.
As she stood there on the second floor of the gymnasium, the game had started. The score was currently 19-15 with Ouginishi leading currently.
It wasn’t her first time watching the boys’ team play, but today’s match made her quite anxious. Especially about what had happened to Udai.
She slowly began to think that perhaps Udai’s injury from saving her had prevented him from playing his best in today’s practice match.
However, just as those thoughts were slowly plundering in her mind, Udai seemed to answer that he was fine.
“Their number 10 is coming now!”
“Three-man block, get ready on count…!”
His high jump met three long, looming arms blocking his vision of the opposing court. Like a brave young crow, he flew over the net, with a chirp that echoed the acceptance of the challenge.
The ball flashed in front of him, and he blasted through. He neatly angled his spike to the vulnerable spot of one of the blockers hands, and sealed the point for Karasuno.
“Alright, let’s take it back!”
Tsubasa was still in awe. Her gaze did not leave his back number wrapped in the arms of his two teammates as they gathered to celebrate the point.
“Kawada-san, nice serve!” Udai called, getting ready in his position as they gathered back to carry the match on.
