Lady Rai @her-rai - Tumblr Blog

They ask and I tell them i didn't have a choice.

In my mind, its just pain.

I asked you to just except what I had to give. It wasn't enough.

So ill deal with the empty and the pain.

Because when I think of you. That's all I've got.

She asked me to be monogamous. And the first time in my life I said NO....

I woke up and called for you.

But you weren't there.

You'll never be there

When youre laying in your bed and you remember her fingers on your flesh. When she finally felt like home. Close the door, its the couch tonight.

exitwound

when emily brontë said “he’s more myself than i am” and when hozier said “i’m almost me again, she’s almost you” and when conan gray said “i know in your head / you see me instead / cause he looks a lot like i did back then”

Her voice came to me in the night.

It projects the silhouette of an angel wings spread wide.

Hands reach out, beckoning me into the light

As we walk she tells .e all the things about this heaven that are perfect.

As we walk towards the light all i can see is the outline of her magnificent wings.

As we walk i for once feel safe and loved.

We reach the light and for once I can see all the amazing colors.

All the warmth of the constant sunshine.

But I feel cold and afraid.

This is not where I belong.

This is my HELL!

But what of this loving feeling, i feel as we walk towards the light?

I turn around and stare back into the darkness, that is where i felt warm,, that is where I belong.

So I walk back into the dark and into forever.

#itonlytakesone #ijustcant

theclimbingdemon-deactivated202

okay...so I guess it’s actually done for good. :(

I’m hurt but I know my truth...

remember my truth.

I’ve got this. I will heal.

her-rai

All i wanna do is throw her on the bed, take her hard and show her she has no choice. She's mine.

She has all my Dominance. She has every last drop of my Dominance.

I can jokingly play with a lover, but I can't take one. I cant inflict the pain that drives me. Its like a moral fracture, I can't be both.

I cant be Domme and love. I cant give all to just one. Whats worse who do I do the disservice to the lover who I will never be my true self with. Or the submissive who drives my soul, but yet I love her submission, but can not give her that one part of me. Because somehow I'm her submission alone she doesn't see the power she has over me. Doesn't see the bond between us.

The truth is I'm a good Dom. And a true Dom would kneel to a great Sub. Because we know we are bound to them. They are ours but we are there.

#heart broken #g #I'llnevertruelybehappy