It's cold.
It's lonely.
It hurts.
Since when did this relationship begin to take a toll? Wasn't it supposed to be fun and easy to be around him? Granted, fights and squabbles were no exception but they were part and parcel of life.
At the very least, they were acceptable.
Maybe it would've been better if there were more fights.
You would have never anticipated that you'd ever think this way, but maybe, just maybe, if there were more fights and making up to do, this relationship wouldn't have run out of steam so fast.
At this juncture, you would gladly take fights over the silent treatment that has now seeped into your daily routine, because there isn't much to say to your husband, who has clearly fallen out of love.
"Your pickiness annoys me."
"The way you laugh loudly without restrain grates on my ears."
The things that once made him fall in love with you... now they are the contributors to him falling out of love with you.
It's scary.
It's suffocating.
The way his eyes no longer lights up at the sight of you; the way he treats you just as though you are a friend, an aquaintance.
This might very well just be two friends living in an apartment together, bounded with words of love that no longer existed between the two of you. Bounded by a legal contract of marriage to seal the bond, that, by now, has pretty much run its course, turning into shackles that restrain you both.
Falling in love was easy.
But falling out of it...
No matter how hard you try, it just doesn't seem like things would return back to the way it was.
Love is fickle.
It hurts.
It forgives.
It soothes...
But now?
All love has to offer to you... is the silent whisper of apologies. Because there is simply nothing else to offer, when it has failed you - even after you placed full trust in it.
Maybe this is, indeed, goodbye.
