In her silence

From the bottom and depth of her existence; the unsaid words have to unveil. ig: @zxserein

[hersilencexx-blog]

"Love me in my insanity, please."

[hersilencexx-blog]

"I've had enough of trying to be good enough to everyone."

[hersilencexx-blog]

What a good feeling when you're crying over good memories instead of bad things happened.

[hersilencexx-blog]

"They are good at hiding their sadness, so am I."

[hersilencexx-blog]

"I'm too dumb to miss you now."

[hersilencexx-blog]

Maybe those people you consider as friends, don't treat and consider you as theirs.

[hersilencexx-blog]

"My day frequently needed a little bit time with you. "

[hersilencexx-blog]

A mirror has spoken

Reflection of sorrow and grief

Appearance matters

Soul become petty

Thoughts and reality drowned her

Wept bitter tears of dissapointment

Underrated existence

Afraid to upset others

Love will fade away

Replace with repugnance

Heart filled of regrets

Shame of self

Rue the day I exist

[hersilencexx-blog]

Can't wait to hold you. Bcos all of the things i have held, the best will be you.

[hersilencexx-blog]

Why is it so hard to express myself, unleash the thoughts and everything that always running in my mind?

[hersilencexx-blog]

We so love each other; closing my eyes and chase you in my dreams is the only way to hold you.

[hersilencexx-blog]

People call it attitude but for me it's the standards that I set to refuse their shits and never let myself to settle for less; for self-respect; I truly deserve the best in all areas in my life.

[hersilencexx-blog]

" I have learnt not to love so hard in my past because of breakups and I lost everything including myself.

I've felt resentful and thought that anyone will do the same

and so i applied this with my current relationship.

I kept pushing him away, expecting a lot from him, i cheated, i fell for someone else, I lied, was heedless partner and made myself drowned into depression.

I didn't realized he was teaching me how to bring back everything.

I didn't realized loving myself wasn't enough; after the lessons I learned from pains, griefs, heartbreaks that happened in my life.

I didn't realized he was sent to me to fulfill the emptiness in me.

I didn't realized that everything was my fault.

I realized everything. Ascertained that all I wished are here and happening in my life.

Now, I'm willing to give everything again. I am frightened. It's a great loss if I lose this person."

[hersilencexx-blog]

I thought I’ve overcame this already. But, everytime i look myself up on the mirror i always see the vulnerable soul and ended up contemplating my worth.

There’s a constantly debate in my head that lead to chaos; a tentative thoughts.

I cant grasp myself anymore because the loud voice of hallucination makes me numb.

I can’t express myself because i am drowning in the sea of illusion.

I keep falling into a deep reverie thus, i don’t know how to stand and fight anymore.

The plant that can’t grow inside of me is yearning for sunlight.

Breathing deeply, letting the cold breeze to touch gently as i shut my eyes and unleash the tears.

[teateapottstinyworld-deactivate]

w h y 😞

[hersilencexx-blog]

Nobody knows why 😞

[hersilencexx-blog]

"I so love how you expressed your fondness to me, I feel like on a cloud nine; never afraid to fall down.

You summoned the cupid to shoot me after he shot you; wasn't aware that it would hit me hard.

His glorious arrow struck my heart, get ready to catch me now"

[hersilencexx-blog]

"She wishes someone who will be intrigued by the sadness within her eyes"

[hersilencexx-blog]

freedom in their hands

You taught and showed me that i didn't deserve to live my life to the fullest

You were the stranger creature who became my nightmares

You were the one of the monsters that led me into the darkness

Your evil laughs that made my soul cried; kept wondering maybe god made me to sacrifice

You were the reason why i was barely breathing and wanting to end my book

I wrote another book for vengeance that torturing you until you lose your last breathe

Your existence was a bruise to my ego and made my inner self to walk backwards

I flew freely like an eagle after world finally break us apart

But the world are getting small. I still sense your presence at times that these sufferings are still telling me that it hasn't ended yet; it will still keep on haunting me.