A blog about my boring life!

Just a blog chasing the ups and downs of the life of ME! Anything from moving 13 hours from my family to starting my new family with my hubby.

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Recent video! Yay like, share, love!

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Craziness

I have a 13 month old.... let that sink in alittle. THIS time last year I had a brand new preemie, I was new at being a mom and wife at the same time, new at learning to juggle existance and new to ppd and anxiety. Now more then a year later I have over come and beaten so many things. I still have my anxiety and at times it really affects me doing things but I am so much better of a person and I have learned so much. Not only from my fiance and child but from the HUGE life change that happens when you become a parent. Life has a crazy way of looking and teaching and I have learned it is best to embrace it as best as you can. I've accepted so many things and I feel SoSoSo much happier then I ever have.

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Beware...

This may be a small rant but I neeeeed to get it out. i know a girl who is near the end of her first pregnancy and honestly she is just hardcore milking it... it may be me but she literally hasn't been to work in 3 days cause she is having braxton hicks and is one....ONE cm dialated. Really?? I mean i understand taking maternity leave at such and such time or leaving for labor but dont milk it. Idk if it is because I busted my ass through my pregnancy and worked while very pregnant and having REAL contractions or she is just striking a raw nerve but GOD! Every pregnancy is a blessing but not every women being pregnant. On the side note I now have a one year old and I have no idea what to do with myself.

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New video!!

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My best friend and i are doing VEDA on our mommy youtube! Check it out

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Check out @ssiera24's Tweet:

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Fifty shades yay or no

So forewarning this is a long post, i really just wanna get some stuff off my mind. So lately I've seen so much about how Fifty Shades of Gray is about an abusive relationship and we shouldn't be exploiting that. Grantide to some people it can come across as such thing but to some people it's normal. I can honestly say i have experienced this kind of relationship not once but TWICE, both times by choice and i was able to leave them by choice as well. My very first experience in BDSM was a relationship that i feel was more then this one in the control aspect, i was in a relationship to where everything about my life except when i used the restroom was controlled. I had to ask to eat and ecplain what i intended to eat, ask to leave my house, ask to sleep...i mean you get the jist. The biggest thing that i believe was a huge show of dominance in not only this relationship but the second one as well was the collaring, i wore a black collar with a link to be chained up if need be! I believe the second relationship was really big on the "abuse" side but it was not abuse at all. I consented in contract even to be beaten,taken advantage of sexually,tied up,blindfolded and have rules. Grantide i still am learning all the time so i may not be seeing this the same way as others but i really believe that it is not abuse but a very in depth s/m relationship. But what do i know really.

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Oooops

So I have been really neglecting my poor blog on Tumblr... so with the new year around the corner I figured hell why not reflect and move forward... First reflection: I got to experience pregnancy give birth to my amazing daughter, my fiance and I have made tremendous strides in our relationship even through some REALLY rough shit! Ive struggled very hard financially and I would say spiritually, I realized alot of things and some of them kinda downright destroyed me then built me up! Mobjng forward: I am accepting the things that are not in my control, I am accepting that I am working towards the body I will have after growing and birthing a human whether that is how it was before (hoping) or something completely new the universe will surprise me. Also I am getting married in May and I don't care who objects cause him and I are driving to vegas and getting married by Elvis lol! I am gonna stide to be an amazing mom, wife and employee. I will take great strides this year! Ooo and I hope fingers crossed hope that my friend and Is blog really blows up this year!!

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Happy sleepy 5 month old baby!

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I've finally decided to embassy my flab! Check out the new video and catch up on precious ones! Great advice mommies! !

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I made a video of my birth story yay! Check out my channel!

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Hello everyone miss B is officially 4 months old! Check out my friend and I's video blog! Like, share and subscribe!

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I give some advice on necessities with a budget.

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Concerned

Let me just state this.. my daughter has everything she needs and I have put her before my husband and I.... So we rent our house from my mother in law and she is extremely selfish and unrelenting... we are really down right now my husband starts a new job Monday but I have no job and I have not been able to get a job. My car was repossessed and so I have no vechile and have had to rely on what little family I have for help. I have no money for daycare either and I'm thankful my aunt will watch her for me but she's looking for a second job which may change her helping us. We may be getting kicked out of our house because of my mother in laws selfishness, I am so sad that no one has helped even after I've asked especially my mother in law! Things were not supposed to play out like this! I had everything planned for after she was born and things have just gotten worse and worse and I refuse to be separated from my family. This is really really taking a toll on me mentally, physically and emotionally. I have as much government assistance as I am allowed to get and that helps with the fact I may be able to eat consistently. .. life is not supposed to be this hard!

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That is scary...

I've taken a long thought today after I received some text messages from my mother in law.... my husband is my mother in law.... My mother in law is selfish and only cares about herself whether it be worth a gain or not. She was threatening to kick us out of her house, we rent her house and we are kinda down on some bad times atm and just need a break but no because she didn't get all her money all hell breaks loose. Any ways my husband can be selfish and conceited alot I hope this changes and it's not permanent because he is not his mom he's a kind amazing good hearted man I don't want him to be bitter.

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Let's talk serious for a minute...:

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Holy 3 months!

It's beyond crazy to believe that I gave birth to my little princess 3 months ago! It's been such a battle not only as a mother but as a wife and mostly as a person. Fighting ppd (post partum depression) I have come to realize that as a mother you don't get "you" time, your confined to mommy ponytails and all things baby consumed. This is where I took the time to actively take time for myself anything from a shower every day, getting dressed from sweats to even just applying some mascara to accompany my mommy ponytail! I can tell you that if you want to fight your ppd find projects for yourself even if it's just organizing a room. Try to do active stuff take walks dance with your baby or even just put baby wear while you clean the house, not only will that help you loose weight you can get stuff done without a screaming baby. I love seeing her grow and see her little personality come through, she started smiling about two weeks ago and now I can't wait to hear her laugh! Babies are truly a genuine gift that I cherish every day even when I've cleaned up my third blowout for the day! Stay strong mommies! If I can survive and grow then you can to! Ooo and if you wouldn't mind my best friend and I have started a channel on youtube! Called mommy brain we talk about all things mommy no bs! It would be greatly appreciated!