&&.  *    SNOWGLOBE  HEART !

under my skin, there will be flowers, and not a single evil thing. not a single reminder of ruin BEATRICE ALDERIGDE admired by jana

[lifeinpoetry]

& if I were to forgive you (& I know I could) who would be left who would be left                          to forgive me?

— Hieu Minh Nguyen, from “Afterwards,” published in Hobart

[hiemaliis]

🎄

truthfully,  beatrice was fairly convinced that she could be doing this in half the time if she only were allowed to rely on her more acrobatic skills,  but --- cecilia was not auburn and thus,  she had not even made the suggestion.  it was nice like this as well  ---  cecilia did not seem to share noel’s . . . tolerance for the song last christmas and thus,  the music that was playing was not designed to grate on beatrice’s ever suffering last remaining nerves.

‘ ‘ i do like your collection of ornaments, ’ ’  she said as she picked another one from the box,  briefly holding it up to inspect it.  it was a gorgeous light blue bauble with a stag painted on it in silver,  quite appealing to beatrice’s aesthetic sense.  looking at all these ornaments,  cecilia would probably get along well with noel,  she decided,  but only if she could set aside her . . .  grievances with auburn  ---  no matter how much noel loved christmas,  beatrice knew that he loved his wife more.  as he should!

she twirled around to look back at the tree  ---  a beautiful,  downright impressive tree  ---  to search it for a good spot to add the ornament she was holding.  ‘ ‘ and i like the colour scheme,  too, ’ ’  she added with the smallest trace of smugness.  she had not yet been at noel’s place,  but she was expecting jewel tones,  this year,  rich hues of sapphire and ruby  ---  it only made sense whenever she glanced at his family.

🎄:  our muses decorate the christmas tree together  *  HOLIDAY ASK MEME.

[worldgiveway-deactivated2021010]

[shiningmorninglight]

[hiemaliis]

Lavender !

beatrice’s trust has always been difficult to gain and, over the course of the centuries, has only grown more difficult to attain.  one aspect of this is that she has learnt the hard way that not trust just anyone is a good choice in the business of staying alive.  the other aspect is that with each year, her loyalties have sunk deeper into her and affect her bonds, present and future alike.  if someone is recommended as trustworthy by those whose opinions she values, she will let this affect her own judgement.  this can make matters confusing for her when she receives contradicting insight from people, but in the greater scheme of things, she has almost always stuck to the safer side of things.

on the other side, should someone break her trust, there is almost no way back.  she has no patience for excuses.  she is not the type to forgive easily to begin with and a breach of trust is one of the worst betrayals she can imagine.  and she does not understand how others can forgive something this big.  even with the life experience of so many centuries, there are things that transcend what beatrice can comprehend --- and this is among them.

lavender:   how easy is it to gain your muse’s trust?  once their trust is broken,   how might one go about mending it ?   *  BOTANICAL HEADCANONS

[promptfairy]

❥     𝐁𝐎𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒    [   𝚆𝙾𝚁𝙳 𝙿𝚁𝙾𝙼𝙿𝚃𝚂    ]   .

headcanon prompts with questions based on plants   &   what they represent in flower language .  happy roleplaying !!  ♡

abatina :   is there anything in life your muse has changed their mind about over time   (   due to becoming more educated on the topic ,   certain experiences  ,   etc .   ) ,    or that they   would   change their mind about under certain circumstances ?  

acanthus :   is your muse deceptive ,   or willing to lie or deceive to achieve certain means ?   why or why not ?   

aloe :   how does your muse handle grief ?

amaryllis :   what is something or someone that your muse takes pride in ?   how do they express that pride ?   

anemone :   how does your muse view the world ;   as a cruel   &   unforgiving place ,   a land full of wonders ,   or something in - between ?  where does that world view come from   (   what experiences ,   life lessons ,   etc .   ) ?  

angelica :   where does your muse draw inspiration in life ?   what motivates them ?

apple blossom :   how does your muse go about expressing or not expressing their sexuality ?  

bachelor’s button :   does your muse actively seek romantic companionship ,   or cherish the liberties of being single ? 

basil :   does your muse have a love - hate relationship with anyone or anything ?

bay tree :   does your muse seek glory   &   accolades ,   or do they favour a simpler ,   more personal life ?  

begonia :   how cautious is your muse ?   are they prone to noticing red flags ,   or paranoid to the point of untrusting most everyone ?   why or why not ?  

belladonna :   how does your muse respond to silence ?   do they take comfort in soundlessness ,   or seek to fill the void with noise ?   

bluebell :   does your muse learn from their past ,   or are they prone to repeating the same mistakes ?  

carnation :   what is your muse’s relationship with their gender ?   how do they express or not express this relationship ?  

chamomile :   what is your muse likely to take away from a painful experience ?   are they one to be haunted by adversity ,   or to use what they’ve gone through to become stronger ?  

chrysanthemum :   how does your muse express romantic love ?  how do they feel about love as a concept ?  

daffodil :   is your muse one to be loyal in relationships ,   or are they likely to quickly move from one bond to another ?

daisy :   did your muse ever feel as though their innocence had been lost ?   what moment in their life could be described as the end of their innocence ?  

edelweiss :   what was the bravest moment in your muse’s life ?  are they known to be courageous from then on ?  

fern :   does your muse believe in magic or cosmic forces ,   or are they more likely to think their life is ultimately a matter of their own control ?  

forget - me - not :   has your muse ever forgotten something that is or was important to them ?   are they afraid of forgetting things like that ?  

gardenia :   is your muse one to confess romantic feelings early on ,   or to conceal them for long periods of time ?  

gladiolus :   describe a moment from your muse’s life that they will never forget .

goldenrod :   does your muse believe in luck or fortune ?  why or why not ?   where do they believe these things come from ?  

heliotrope :   does your muse believe in soulmates ?

hibiscus :   how does your muse view the gentler ,   daintier things in life ?   as things worth preserving   &   caring for ,   or things only bound to wither   &   disappear ?  

holly :   how strong is your muse’s sense of intuition ?  are they aware of it ?   do they ever fear that it is only paranoia ?  

hollyhock :   how strong is your muse’s sense of ambition ?  what’s something they strive for in life ?  

hyacinth :   is your muse athletic ?   does it come naturally to them ,   or have they had to work for their physique and/or skill ?  

hydrangea :   how much does your muse value communication in their relationships with others ?  are they prone to being misunderstood ?

iris :   if your muse could convey one last message to someone they have lost or left behind ,   what would it be ?  

ivy :   what are your muse’s views on marriage ?   do they believe it is something strictly for love ,   or an institution rooted in business   &   social benefits ?   do they desire or have they desired to be married ?

lavender :   how easy is it to gain your muse’s trust ?  once their trust is broken ,   how might one go about mending it ?  

lilac :   what was your muse’s childhood like ?   how has their upbringing affected them as they’ve aged ? 

lily :   how does your muse view their mother ?  

lotus :   has your muse ever felt as though they’ve been reborn ?  have they ever desired the feeling of a fresh start ,   or a better understanding of themself and/or the world around them ?  

magnolia :   describe your muse’s relationship with nature   &   the natural world .  

marigold :   is your muse prone to jealousy ?  how might they handle envious feelings ?  

mint :   does your muse view themself as virtuous   &   moral ?  what do these words mean to them ?

nasturtium :   describe your muse’s relationship with their birthplace ,   or homeland .  

oak :   who would your muse consider the strongest person they know ?  

pansy :   does your muse often reflect on their own actions ?   do they ever think a lot about the past ,   and what they could have done differently ?

parsley :   describe a holiday your muse enjoys ,   and why they enjoy it .

peony :   what would a   ‘  happy life  ’   look like in your muse’s eyes ?

poppy :   what comforts your muse ?

rhododendron :   is your muse receptive to warnings   &   advice given by others ?

rose :   how much does your muse value other people ?   do they wish to have many friends ,   lovers ,   and/or associates ?   are they an easy person to love ?

sage :   what is your muse’s legacy ?   what do they want to be remembered for   &   what might they actually be remembered for ?  

salvia :   is your muse possessive over people or things that matter a lot to them ?  how do they express that possessiveness ,   or lack thereof ? 

snapdragon :   is your muse merciful ?  why or why not ?

southernwood :   how seriously does your muse take themself ?   do they prefer a solemn   &   intellectual atmosphere or do they delight in jokes   &   banter ?  

sunflower :   what brings your muse the most joy in life ?  

tulip :   how does your muse view people in general ?  

violet :   how does your muse respond to betrayal ?

willow :   how does your muse handle sadness   &   depression ?

zinnia :   how has the loss of fallen comrades and/or loved ones affected your muse ?   has it taught them anything or given them any new perspectives ?

[hiemaliis]

❝ fear wears of in time. much like mild poison. ❞

beatrice was, she wanted to argue, more used to poison than she was to fear.  poison was an old acquaintance --- first because she had been taught to make and to use it during the lessons of her youth, then because she had been poisoned . . . on several occasions.  now, this would be as bad as it sounded, if --- if poison affected her as much as it should, but it did not.  had not in a very long time.  she had  ( once, a very long time ago, in a bad century )  run the calculations how much it would take for her to start feeling the effect, and she had not liked the result very much.

still, poison was a known variable.  but fear . . . she almost hissed with teeth, with sharpness as her legs trembled as she forced herself to remain seated in her chair.  she had walked paths, darkened by fear looming over her head.  she had walked on even when every single step had demanded of her to defy her instincts.  where poison wore off, where she could just keep walking through an almost failing heart, fear was not so easily bartered with.  fear demanded the full price and it was not hesitant to take its tribute in blood.

‘ ‘ perhaps you are wiser than me, then, ’ ’ she said quietly as she grasped her own ankle, pushing it down towards the ground and willing her feet to remain steady there.  jumpiness, no matter where she showed it, was always a sign of weakness and beatrice was not someone who thought that weakness was part of an appropriate dinner attire.  ‘ ‘ i have not many fears left, but those that remain. . . ’ ’

death.  no matter how she dressed it up, what she feared was death.  such a simple, such a human fear --- and so revealing.  two millennia of happiness and strife, of joy and violence.  she had seen so much more than she had ever thought she would when she had been young, but no matter how much time had passed, her fear was the same as ever: death.  or maybe, if she wanted to dig deeper: being left alone.  and those were no fears that could wear off, were they?  as long as she cared about others, as long as there was fondness for others in her heart, she would always want them to stay.

[meiselr]

1000 Picspams Challenge | #194 - Modern Khione

[hiemaliis]

"We all move forward anyway. Ripples in all directions."

draped over auburn and noel’s chaiselongue, a headache trying to smash her skull into pieces, beatrice was not in the mood.  not in the mood for the hosts gazing deep into each others eyes as if they had never seen each other before.  not even in the mood for dylan talking about the new books he had bought himself for saturnalia.  definitely not in the mood for april’s philosophic output. hell, she had been barely in the mood for felix showing her atticus’ new little house and she adored atticus and …  might be kind of, sort of in love with felix.

still — she had said she would behave, and even if she had said this before her head had declared war on the rest of her body, she would keep her word.  pulling her shawl tighter around her frame and willing the goddamn painkiller she had nicked from auburn’s personal stash to please work, she turned her head to at least look at april.  she should be getting awards for not having left an hour ago and even more for grinning and bearing her headache in silence.

gingerly, she rested her blissfully cold fingers against her forehead and exhaled.  for the first time in a very long time, having low blood pressure was helpful, and she was going to take advantage of this, especially since it did not even draw a lot attention to her.  ‘ ‘ true — and thankfully so, imagine we’d all be stuck in the same place. the absence of progress, of growth would be quite dull, ’ ’  she said sagely as her eyes scanned the room, seeking for either someone she could have a non-conversation with or someone she could redirect april towards.  alas, unless she wanted to send her into the direction of isaac and dion  ( which seemed like a moderately unwise choice ),  there were no options.  reaching for her water glass, beatrice sighed. ‘ ‘ tell me, april, ’ ’ she continued before taking a few sips, ‘ ‘ are there any big commissions you are working on, currently? because i was thinking about commissioning something at some point … and i wanted to wait until what i presume to be the holiday rush has … passed. ’ ’

[garettphotography]

[hiemaliis]

what kind of soul are you ?

you are a retrospective soul

the most misunderstood of all the soul signs.  sometimes even you have difficulty seeing yourself as who you are, you are intense and desire perfection in every facet of your life and you're best described as extremely idealistic, hardworking, and a survivor.  great moments of insight and sensitivity come to you often, but if you aren't careful, you'll ignore these moments and repeat past mistakes as for you, it is difficult to separate the past from the present.  you will succeed once you overcome the disappointments in life.

souls you are most compatible with:

prophet soul

traveller soul

tagged by: @chaoticor​ tagging: whoever wants to!

[hiemaliis]

❝ I found what I want is what I cannot have. ❞ - dion

beatrice angled her head as she looked at the wizard, painted lips forming a frown.  perhaps it was easy for her to say, living as reclusive as she did, but things were usually not this complicated for her, were they?  still, dion was her friend, was someone whose company she treasured  ( and not just because he was a reliable source for potions that kept her fur glossy ),  and so she poured them each another cup of tea before she folded her hands in front of her.  dion had come for advice, she supposed, and though this was not the kind of service she usually offered --- she was better at digging her claws deep into anything that had lost its way, creature or hunter alike --- he was a dear friend and for friends, she made exceptions.  as a hunter, she was not supposed to, but she was not supposed to be a hunter and a creature either.

‘ ‘ i’m hardly an expert for this, ’ ’ she warned as she leaned back into her chair, into her pile of blankets and pillows.  she usually was not this prone to ‘nesting’, but with the cold moon above them, even she was in need of another layer of warmth, embarrassing as this was.  still --- her words were the truth.  for all her experience at wanting  ( and when had she ever not wanted one thing or another ),  she was inexperienced when it came to craving things out of her reach.  she had wanted what she should not, especially in terms of lovers, but . . . that had been usually about common sense or traditional understandings of hunter-prey-dynamics.  when it came to material possessions, on the other hand . . .  she let her gaze roam over her shelves, an almost smug expression crossing her face.  it might not always have been an immediate success, but she had gotten her claws on anything she had ever wanted, in the end.

in her entire life, she had never, she noted with a tinge of surprise, attempted to obtain something for another unless it had been part of a trade.  curious.  it was always so strange to realise that after so many years, she still had things she had never done.  ‘ ‘ dion, ’ ’ she said as she stirred a hint of honey into her tea, less for the taste and more to make her upcoming nightly shift easier on her throat, ‘ ‘ what is it that you want?  a magical item?  a  new job?  a . . . person?  because, within reason, i am here to help.  i mean --- it cannot be more out there than what that sea witch has been asked to obtain for her cousin, can it? ’ ’

--- @athensborn

[hiemaliis]

⛄️ ( =   send  ⛄️  for  our  muses  to  build  a  snowman  together . ) ------ sent by @youngforevr​

it was neither a secret nor had it ever been meant to be one: beatrice was fond of the colder season.  there had been a time when she might have cited the fact that she felt lethargic and void of anything in the summer, but she had stopped coming up with an explanation for everything unless people actually asked.  they did not, usually.  most of those who knew her, truly knew her, had dealt with her moods and its shifts for decades, they knew when to let her drift and when to pull her back and hold her close.  and well, in wintertime, her energy reached almost unfamiliar heights and she was the one who was pulling on others, dragging them outside.

really, asphodel had never stood much of a chance for beatrice had been waiting for her to come home from another short shift, jacket on the chair next to her, gloves and hat in her lap.  noel would do the same, a thought that was more calming than she would want to admit even though it had not been a secret for centuries that when she looked at the supposed adults, it was noel to whom she looked for guidance as he was simply the wisest, most reasonably choice.  and luckily, del did not look tired when she came through the door  ( which meant that for the first time ever, beatrice had reason to be grateful to freya which was a weird thought altogether ).

she effortlessly rose from the chair and stepped into her boots,  the smile on her face growing wider and wider with every moment.  ‘ ‘ dearest, dearest della, ’ ’ she announced as she slipped into her jacket, then her gloves.  ‘ ‘ while you left me for work, i inspected the snow in the garden. it’s perfect to build a snowman.  or, given the amount of snow --- a snowfamily. ’ ’ 

halting for a moment, just as her friend’s face lit up, she wondered if she should have called felix.  there were old, very old memories in her head, memories of . . . a different time, memories that seemed to belong to a different person  ( time did that to her, often ).  she had been happy, then.  she was almost certain that he, too, had been happy then as well.  he might be happy now, too, she thought as she tied her shoelaces.  he might be happy and he would deserve this, no matter how complicated things had become.  but --- she could not call him each time she thought of an old memory she found worth reliving, not just because there were too many  ( though there most certainly were ), but also because he had a family too, now.  and because noel and auburn deserved to experience the new memory of building a snowman with their son.  she would not be greedy and there was no reason for greed either as there was an infinite future stretching out in front of her.

( sometimes, her condition did not feel daunting, sometimes, it just meant she had time. )

her gloved hand reached for asphodel’s and she smiled as she pulled the older-and-younger one along, through the living room and out the glass door. della was not her second choice to build a snowman with; felix and her were playing in two very different leagues --- with del, she was excited to make new memories  ( and there were so many ahead of them that she felt like she could burst ),  with felix . . . it was more about giving old, sad memories a happier context.  and both, both was good.  she looked over her shoulder as she squeezed del’s hand.  ‘ ‘ i’m happy you are here with me, ’ ’ she said earnestly. 

[love]

by emma parker

[weltenwellen]

Ellen Bass, from “Angels”, The Human Line

[diverquent]

[mountain-sides-deactivated20131]

[elrood-deactivated20160221]

Clasped by melissathall on Flickr

Cave Hill Cemetery, Louisville, KY.