Truth.
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DEAR READER
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@hiishadow
Truth.
There are two types of girls in this world.
I doubt anyone ever checks my posts but I do hope everyone from my past is happy and in good health :)
Thank you
“I need someone to look up to
A role model I could run to
When I feel lost and I'm confused and I'm outta touch with my young roots
I need confidence, all that I can get
And I love you and your common sense
'Cause lately, I've been tryna live this thug life and I'm not convinced
Look, I love how you handle your own
Glad you are the king to your own castle
You handle life when it's thrown at you
Never curl up, never 'fo fragile, I need you to be here, regardless
Teach me how to be there for my kids
Show me how to be fearless often, I need real guidance, I am scared of options
Because of you, I've got a clearer conscience
Because of you, I'm not scared of monsters
Because of you, I'm not afraid of failure
My life was blurry, you made it clearer
And God forbid, if you died now
I know that I'll be well taken care of
I know you'll be there waiting for me”
Joyner Lucas - Frozen
Don’t text and drive , don’t be that person.
It ain’t that important.
Love my friends! Even tho I’m a sick piece of shit rn . They always make everything better !
“She claim she exotic , the only thing exotic is this weed in my pocket”
- J.I.D
“Love somebody, don’t just fuck anybody”
- J.I.D
A reason why
Because they already did their grieving while they were dating you.
Nobody who's in a loving committed relationship wakes up with the thought of leaving someone on Monday, and then follows through with it on the coming Thursday.
It takes time. When leaving someone first enters their mind, they push it away. They feel guilty for even having the inkling of that. They're with an amazing person, they should feel lucky! In an effort to get rid of those thoughts, they redouble their effort in the relationship. They initiate sex more, they get you a bunch of little gifts, they start planning trips. Anything to rekindle the spark they once had.
But the feeling doesn't go away.
So they start googling help at work. They keep hoping that what they're feeling is just due to stress of some new situation in their life. But nothing is helping. And that thought isn't going away.
So they confide in a close friend. They go out for drinks, and after weeks or even months of not daring to say out loud what they've been thinking, they blurt out their darkest thoughts. And what they get back from their friends is consideration and understanding. They're there for them. They want what's best for them.
After a couple of weeks of talking it over with their friends and family, they finally make the decision to that they're going to end things. But that's going to be so hard! How are they supposed to move on from this? How are they supposed to live life without this other person by their side?
So they get really sad and despondent. You recognize that something is wrong, and attempt to console them. You start doing all these extra nice things for them, because you can tell something is wrong, but you don't know what. They cry in your arms constantly. They want to tell you their feelings, but they're afraid of you lashing out.
So they just remain in the relationship, miserable, and sad, and wondering how much longer it's going to take before they finally actually commit to ending it.
And then one afternoon, after much support and insistence from their family and friends, they sit you down and tell you that it's over.
And that's why when you ask to talk about it, they refuse.
That's why all your texts go unanswered.
That's why they appear to be so cold.
That's why weeks after you break up, they're on instagram and facebook having a great time with their friends.
That's why a couple months after you break up, they're able to start seeing someone.
Because they've already done the grieving part. Everything that you're going through right now, they've already been through it. Only they were able to use your love to help get through it.
It's not that they were able to move on so quick. It's just that they had a super head start on the grieving process.
“Look at all the bullshit I’ve been through. If I take you home , would you tell the truth ?”
- Kendrick Lamar
Fuck it , let’s take some shrooms too.
I tried suicide once , so I’ll try it again .
Eminem.
But I love you so much it hurts, never mistreated you once. I poured my heart out to you, let down my guard swear to God. I'll blow my brains in your lap, lay here and die in your arms
My new favorite fucking song. Everytime I listen to it I tear up. Already know it word for word…
Promise me if I cave in and break and leave myself open , that I won't be making a mistake..