Because Life.

[hillmanswag]

I hate seeing the doctor.

The uncomfortable feeling of being around sickness and just the fact you're there to discuss your body...

How about... no? Please?

[hillmanswag]

It's funny that my mother and her boyfriend get to act like 12 year olds whenever they want but yet it's a sin for me to act like a 17 year old, given that I actually am one. That's right. Keep up the silent treatment. I could care less.

[hillmanswag]

School is dumb.

But we already knew this, right? Yesterday I missed a day of school because... Reasons. Just. Personal/whatever reasons. And I go back to school and teachers act like it's the end of the world that I missed one day. Well. I'm sorry I'm a human being and already have a life outside of this crap hole. And no, don't ask for my excuse because it's none of your business anyways. Wow. This sounded really sassy. I guess it's just one of those days. Idiots. They're everywhere. Suck it.

[hillmanswag]

Uh

Well. I originally planned a huge rant. But the more I typed the more ridiculous it sounded and I just erased the whole thing. I'm skipping 6th period currently because I can't handle the nonstop noise and yelling in the class. Some days I just wish the whole world could be silent for at least five minutes so I could take a break from the constant stupidity people blurt out every second. Can't people just realize that I want to be alone and think? I appreciate people trying to cheer me up... But whoever said I was in a bad mood? Sometimes I just don't want to talk. Sometimes I just want to be by myself and reflect on everything. So that's what I'm doing right now, and I decided to share it with tumblr because I don't want to talk to an actual human in physical form right now.

[hillmanswag]

My sister playing flappy bird. She's so frustrated.

[asparrowsdexterity-deactivated2]

Telling my sister to play flappy bird was the best thing I’ve ever done. Within 1 minute she is already yelling.

[hillmanswag]

To those who like cars.

I love my car. In fact, I was following a fan page for the type of car I have and enjoyed looking at the posts from other people. But then they started posting pictures of girls wearing nothing. I hate being a girl sometimes. I mean I guess it's kinda expected to see that on a page about cars... But it just kinda bummed me out that there has to be a stereotype like that out there. Idk maybe I'm just being sensitive. But it just really annoys me so I unfollowed the page.

[hillmanswag]

I don't understand why I do this to myself.

So I'm addicted to Pinterest, and I'm not sure why, but I always find myself going to the Wedding section. I pin everything from there to my "If I Don't Die Alone" board. Does anyone else like to make themselves miserable and do the same thing? Like honestly, I'm pretty sure if I somehow am lucky enough to find someone that is as insane and weird as I am and get married to them, I probably will end up doing 5% of the things I pin on there. But yet I keep pinning.

Why.

Why.

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

Hillman out.

[hillmanswag]

Girls who compete with each other.

Yes, I wear makeup. I love makeup. Does that make me a brainless barbie doll? No. Does it mean I have no respect for myself? Definitely not. Nowadays, it's attractive for girls to be "natural" and to be bookworms who dwell in cloudy weather, at least that's what everyone is pressuring me to be. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that, if you're genuinely into those sort of things. But It's people who feel like this trend is the only thing that makes a girl "mysterious" or "attractive" or whatever that really get on my last nerve. Why try being something you're not? Don't you want someone to love you for what and who you actually are rather than just for following the crowd that claim to be so "unique"? And this goes for any "trends" as well. I remember girls at school tried telling me to stuff my bra because I was supposed to be ashamed of being flat. Really people??

I, personally, do love to read, but I'm extremely picky about what I choose to read. If a book doesn't move me or impact my thoughts, then there's no point in me reading it. Because of this, I haven't read anything in a while. So now I guess that makes me an idiot or whatever. 

As for makeup, I just adore it. When I feel like kicking some butt I put on my favorite Rebel by Mac lipstick. And guess what? I don't give a crap whether you think that makes me a skank or not because you know what? I know I'm not. I don't crave attention and most of my life I've been alone and I'm confident anyways. So suck on that.

So next time you feel like telling me in order to be a "cool girl"-or whatever crap you people call it these days-I have to meet all of these qualifications, I'm going to tactfully tell you to smooch my anus.

Hillman out.

[hillmanswag]

Coffee.

I keep thinking about how excited I am to drink coffee tomorrow morning and yet I cannot manage to fall asleep.

[giarosemarie-blog]

New Year...

Am I the only one that doesn’t care/isn’t excited? It’s not going to be any different for me, at least not for a very long time.

[hillmanswag]

this this this this ^

[hillmanswag]

Instagram.

Sometimes when I see a picture I like on Instagram, I refrain from "liking" it because it already has enough "likes" and I don't want to add to their popularity.

[hillmanswag]

Me at Social Gatherings: A Haiku

I am embarrassed I continue blabbering Mind tells me "shut up."

[hillmanswag]

How I feel when I see people I hate from school in the actual real world.

[hillmanswag]

People.

Is it just me or sometimes does someone's existence alone piss you off? Not that I wanna go around killing everyone, no, not at all. But it gets to that point where everything they do annoys the heck out of you. What they post on Facebook (yet I don't delete these people because I'm a major stalker... you know you are too!) down to the way they breathe! Goodnight nurse! It's like once you find the one thing about a person that bothers you beyond the point of no return there really is just no going back. Kind of like the episode of How I Met Your Mother where Ted and Marshall realize Lily's chewing. You can't ignore it. For me as of late it's been this certain person and they only really started irritating me because we were at the same gathering and I felt some bad vibes, and let me tell you that sure can put a damper on things. Then the second thing that got me was an issue between that person and a best friend of mine. That was the last straw, you mess with the BFF, now you mess with me! Ha. Today it was something I read on a social networking site... people can just be so rude at times! Get over yourself already! You definitely are NOT above any other person out there, nor are you the center of the universe. Anyways. I'm done talking negatively about that. Some of you will hate about this post and others (I know a lot of you) will agree with me, it's just may be not something "acceptable" to talk about in fear of hurting someones feelings, but this is a blog for ranting and that is darn well what I am going to do! So there.

[hillmanswag]

WHYYYY??????????

I have awaken. At 4 am. Not sure if I should continue being awake and have some coffee, or if I should fail once more at trying to go back to sleep.

Why must I have a mental alarm clock. 

I blame you, Dad. 

Hillman out. 

[hillmanswag]

People who suck at texting.

Ok. I completely understand. Maybe you're busy, maybe you have other things on your mind. That's alright. Just a simple "Hey I'm busy yo text ya later nerd" would do. But no. You had to use the dreaded "kk." Why. You texted me first. I tried so hard to make the conversation interesting and you just continued with "yeah" and "k." Then the moment I don't respond--because you clearly suck at having conversation and there's no point as to why I should even try to talk to you any further--you text back and ask me why I didn't respond. Maybe it's because you  drive me to the level of boredom and insanity where I have no choice but to hulk smash the nearest piece of furniture in sight.

I'd just like to remind you, you texted me first.

xoxo

Hillman out