Thor Odinson

I did not buy talking bacon on purpose.

#bacon #halloween #pumpkins #scary #tasty #happyhalloween #breakfast

Isn't it more worrying if you did it by accident?

Tangle

Thor rubbed her ears and transferred her to his shoulder. It was a bit of a mystery why the kittens seemed to like him, but, while he wouldn’t have chosen to be festooned in them, they weren’t really in the way up there.

“I haven’t done anything to try and attract these little monsters,’ said Thor.

Askepott settled in next to her brother’s haunch and surveyed the kitchen, purring erratically in Thor’s ear.

“Mm, they may just be contrary. They are cats, after all.” And literally were technically little monsters, at that.

"Yes," Thor agreed. He steadied Askepott on his shoulder with one hand as he turned. "Thank you for untangling me. And please don't tell Loki about this."

Tangle

Askepott stretched over from Jolteon’s washing to sniff at his toes, then looked up and purred.

“Do you all just really like my feet?” asked Thor. Then he bent down and held his hands out to her. “If you’re going to bother me you can come up here with your brother, it’s less trouble than having you around my feet.”

“I assume you didn’t wash them in catnip,” Roskva joked.

Askepott trilled happily and contracted to climb onto his palm.

Thor rubbed her ears and transferred her to his shoulder. It was a bit of a mystery why the kittens seemed to like him, but, while he wouldn't have chosen to be festooned in them, they weren't really in the way up there.

"I haven't done anything to try and attract these little monsters,' said Thor.

Tangle

Macavity mewed and started rubbing against Thor’s boots, although thankfully not wrapping around them again. Thor scooped him up, just in case, rather surprised when all of him came up without any trouble. The kitten scrambled up Thor’s front, draped himself around Thor’s shoulders and started purring sleepily.

“Well, at least somebody’s comfortable.” Glora, too, had reduced herself to several inches long and was washing. Hrifla, despite being the first to abandon the cream earlier, was now well on his way to swabbing the last traces out of the second pan.

“They do seem to have calmed down,” said Thor. Now that his boots were kitten free he took them off and left them by the door.

Askepott stretched over from Jolteon’s washing to sniff at his toes, then looked up and purred.

"Do you all just really like my feet?" asked Thor. Then he bent down and held his hands out to her. "If you're going to bother me you can come up here with your brother, it's less trouble than having you around my feet."

Tangle

Macavity mewed and started rubbing against Thor’s boots, although thankfully not wrapping around them again. Thor scooped him up, just in case, rather surprised when all of him came up without any trouble. The kitten scrambled up Thor’s front, draped himself around Thor’s shoulders and started purring sleepily.

“Well, at least somebody’s comfortable.” Glora, too, had reduced herself to several inches long and was washing. Hrifla, despite being the first to abandon the cream earlier, was now well on his way to swabbing the last traces out of the second pan.

"They do seem to have calmed down," said Thor. Now that his boots were kitten free he took them off and left them by the door.

Tangle

“Would it be paranoid to suggest them did it just to embarrass me?” asked Thor.

Macavity tipped his head on one side in a who, me? look.

“I don’t know….” Roskva eyed the kitten. “That expression is not actually making you look innocent.”

Macavity mewed and started rubbing against Thor's boots, although thankfully not wrapping around them again. Thor scooped him up, just in case, rather surprised when all of him came up without any trouble. The kitten scrambled up Thor's front, draped himself around Thor's shoulders and started purring sleepily.

Tangle

Glora gave Roskva a disdainful look and headbutted her ankle.

“As long as they don’t eat parts of them first I wouldn’t mind that,” said Thor. “Are they still jumping into your baths?”

Roskva scratched Glora’s ears. Jolteon helpfully began washing Askepott. “Yes. And going around my ankles, although they hadn’t been this persistent.”

"Would it be paranoid to suggest them did it just to embarrass me?" asked Thor.

Macavity tipped his head on one side in a who, me? look.

Tangle

“I’m not sure whether I should be touched he’s trying to share his favourite food with me,” Thor remarked, in a better mood now that the kittens were almost entirely removed (one last loop of Macavity was proving surprisingly stubborn, but wasn’t enough to make moving impossible by itself).

Glora decided she’d had enough cream and started to wash herself, then gave her stretched out body a dismayed look as she realised how long washing it would take and began to contract.

“It is rather sweet. Or possibly manipulative, but that is why I gave it to him in the first place,” Roskva said, in between cracking up at Glora’s discomfiture. “I mentioned worrying about the possibility that they’d all decide it was necessary to share their rats with us to Mithgarthsorm.” The latest application of kennings and periphrasis: identifying alternate-universe counterparts. “He suggested they might bring fish instead.”

Glora gave Roskva a disdainful look and headbutted her ankle.

"As long as they don't eat parts of them first I wouldn't mind that," said Thor. "Are they still jumping into your baths?"

Tangle

Between the three of them Thor finally managed to get one foot free, which meant he could balance well enough to free both hands to work on freeing the other.

Macavity finally noticed what was going on and started hauling the saucepans again, possibly under the impression that giving Thor catnip-flavored cream would persuade him to stop removing kittens from his ankles, which were clearly their rightful place in the universe. The other three, however, had pretty much lost interest in snuggling Thor’s boots and distracted their brother by pouncing on him to make him quit moving their snack.

"I'm not sure whether I should be touched he's trying to share his favourite food with me," Thor remarked, in a better mood now that the kittens were almost entirely removed (one last loop of Macavity was proving surprisingly stubborn, but wasn't enough to make moving impossible by itself).

Glora decided she'd had enough cream and started to wash herself, then gave her stretched out body a dismayed look as she realised how long washing it would take and began to contract.

Tangle

Thor picked up a foot and, to his relief, one coil of kitten slid down. For a moment he thought it was going to come off, but the other kitten bodies held it in place. He wiggled his foot around to see if that helped - feeling completely ridiculous, and glad that Loki hadn’t come down to see what was going on.

Jolteon dragged downward on one of the lower loops, although unfortunately this prompted it to dangle underneath his foot so he couldn’t put it down. Roskva set out a larger pan, hoping it wasn’t going to become a problem when their stomachs shrank down again, and came over to help.

Between the three of them Thor finally managed to get one foot free, which meant he could balance well enough to free both hands to work on freeing the other.

Tangle

Thor looked at the kittens doubtfully. On the one hand they were the children of his archenemy and currently being rather embarrassing. On the other they were kittens.

“I don’t want to hurt them,” he said, dubiously. “Maybe we can untangle them while they’re busy with the cream without me shocking them?”

“Then I think I’d better refill the pan,” Roskva said, suiting action to word — Hrifla gave up on washing Jolteon and wormed back over to the pan. “Maybe if you pick your foot up we can slide them off?”

Thor picked up a foot and, to his relief, one coil of kitten slid down. For a moment he thought it was going to come off, but the other kitten bodies held it in place. He wiggled his foot around to see if that helped - feeling completely ridiculous, and glad that Loki hadn't come down to see what was going on.

Tangle

“I’m not sure.” Roskva patted Macavity’s ears consolingly, as either way he’d probably thought he was helping. She thought. “I usually talk to them like they might.” Granted, she did that to Kisa, too.

She glanced up at a flicker of yellow in the doorway. Eevee — or rather Jolteon, though she answered to either — had come in, ears tilted. “What are you doing?”

“Are you asking us or the kittens? We’re trying to get untangled and they’re tangling.”

Thor got his hand between his leg and a body and this time managed to stretch it a little way. Which left three bodies and his other hand still holding the counter for balance.

“They’re succeeding better than we are.”

Jolteon came over and put her paws on top of the kittens. “They usually let go if I shock them a little,” she offered. “Have you tried that?”

“Jolteon—!”

“I said a little!” Evidently they didn’t hold much of a grudge about it, as Glora abandoned the emptying saucepan to circle around and attempt to wash the Pokemon’s ears.

Thor looked at the kittens doubtfully. On the one hand they were the children of his archenemy and currently being rather embarrassing. On the other they were kittens.

"I don't want to hurt them," he said, dubiously. "Maybe we can untangle them while they're busy with the cream without me shocking them?"

Tangle

Macavity looked up from the pan, white around his mouth, and then set his teeth on the handle and started trying to tow it back toward Thor, somewhat to his siblings’ consternation.

“He didn’t mean he wanted the cream!” Roskva said, hastily grabbing the handle. Macavity looked reproachfully at her.

“Did he understand me?” asked Thor, rather startled. He’d been thinking of them as normal - well, normalish - kittens. But Sleipnir, while definitely a horse, sometimes seemed to have an uncanny understanding of what was going on around him.

“I’m not sure.” Roskva patted Macavity’s ears consolingly, as either way he’d probably thought he was helping. She thought. “I usually talk to them like they might.” Granted, she did that to Kisa, too.

She glanced up at a flicker of yellow in the doorway. Eevee — or rather Jolteon, though she answered to either — had come in, ears tilted. “What are you doing?”

“Are you asking us or the kittens? We’re trying to get untangled and they’re tangling.”

Thor got his hand between his leg and a body and this time managed to stretch it a little way. Which left three bodies and his other hand still holding the counter for balance.

"They're succeeding better than we are."

Tangle

Macavity looked up from the pan, white around his mouth, and then set his teeth on the handle and started trying to tow it back toward Thor, somewhat to his siblings’ consternation.

“He didn’t mean he wanted the cream!” Roskva said, hastily grabbing the handle. Macavity looked reproachfully at her.

"Did he understand me?" asked Thor, rather startled. He'd been thinking of them as normal - well, normalish - kittens. But Sleipnir, while definitely a horse, sometimes seemed to have an uncanny understanding of what was going on around him.

Tangle

“Mrrp,” said Askepott, climbing over Roskva’s hand and trying to wrap around her wrist.

Thor tried to bend down without being able to move his feet to balance, and wound up catching onto the counter with one hand while he grabbed Askepott with the other.

“We’re going to wind up tied together by kittens,” he said, sounding resigned. “Maybe you could lure them off with something?”

“That’s worth a try.” She hoped they wouldn’t just go to it with their heads and leave the rest of themselves wrapped up. Perhaps even in that case, at least they’d be distracted enough to be slid off Thor’s boots. Roskva extracted her hand from the offended Askepott while Hrifla patted her wrist with, in contrast to his name, no claw-use at all. She poured cream into a saucepan, then opened a carefully sealed container of catmint — four pairs of little ears perked up and four small noses lifted and sniffed — and threw a handful in, followed by watercress.

Thor sighed when four little front ends scooted off across the floor, Glora in the lead, while four back ends remained trapping his feet. Still, the cream seemed to have distracted them enough that it was absent-mindedness rather than desire to stay wrapped around him.

"You've left something behind," he told them, shaking his head.

Tangle

“More than a bit,” agreed Thor, scowling at them. “And I thought Loki was hard to untangle.” Not that Loki wound around his ankles, but since Loki tended to gravitate towards warmth in his sleep and was a frequent travelling companion Thor had wound up unwrapping him in the morning a few times.

McCavity’s purring ratcheted up a notch, possibly mistaking Roskva’s efforts for petting.

“It turns out Sky does the same thing, only his hair gets into the act.” She pulled a kitten-body outward, and it folded snugly around both her hand and Thor’s ankle. “…Stop that.”

"Mrrp," said Askepott, climbing over Roskva's hand and trying to wrap around her wrist.

Thor tried to bend down without being able to move his feet to balance, and wound up catching onto the counter with one hand while he grabbed Askepott with the other.

"We're going to wind up tied together by kittens," he said, sounding resigned. "Maybe you could lure them off with something?"

Tangle

“Roskva!”

Thor was in the kitchen, having just come in from seeing to the goats. he was standing very still and in a somewhat awkward position - four kittens wrapped thoroughly around his feet in overlapping directions so that he couldn’t move without tripping over or treading on one.

They were purring.

Roskva arrived at a sprint and caught herself on the doorframe, where she made a small, strangled noise in her throat. She wasn’t quite sure whether it meant to be laughter or swearing. The kitchen was filled with the small contented rumble of happy, ridiculous-looking kittens and the electric feeling of Thor’s exasperation.

“Oh dear.” She dropped down by his feet to slide a hand between the middle of a kitten and Thor’s ankle, hoping that they would allow themselves to be stretched loose enough to step out of. Glora looked up and headbutted her hand in a clear why-aren’t-you-petting-me gesture, so it probably wasn’t her middle. “You are taking this winding around people’s ankles idea more than a bit too far,” Roskva told her.

"More than a bit," agreed Thor, scowling at them. "And I thought Loki was hard to untangle." Not that Loki wound around his ankles, but since Loki tended to gravitate towards warmth in his sleep and was a frequent travelling companion Thor had wound up unwrapping him in the morning a few times.

McCavity's purring ratcheted up a notch, possibly mistaking Roskva's efforts for petting.