bloody princess

[hollytavarez]

jackainsleyleighton‌:

“Somehow I feel like that explains everything,” Jack replied when she mentioned Kel. Jack hadn’t known the two of them before they were no longer together, but assuming they were happy and just a oil and water as they are now. He figured that was a lesson filled with distractions. Jack made a face as if he were offended. “Do I look like a man who likes plastic surgery riddled white girls with too much money and outlandish behavior?”

“Does it though?” The question was more rhetorical than anything else, she didn’t need anyone saying they understood her and Kel’s relationship when she hardly even understood it, especially now. She raised an eyebrow, looking him up and down slowly. “I mean, kind of?”

[hollytavarez]

jackainsleyleighton‌:

Jack finished fixing the remote. “That or you just never had a decent teacher to show you how things work.” He had a knack for machines, so he couldn’t really hate them. He opened up the guide menu and handed the remote back to Holly. “You know what you were looking to watch?”

“Tell that to Kel.” She grumbled. “He kept trying to show me.” It was a bittersweet memory now, as much as she’d enjoyed it at the time, mostly watching how frustrated he got. “Uh, anything but the Kardashians?”

[hollytavarez]

Rock Bottom ~ Task 2

tw: drugs, drinking, blood, death, vampires, etc

Holly is laying in a pool of vomit and what she’s trying not to think of as sewage when she decides that this is it; rock bottom. Somewhere in the back of her head, the thought floats in that she should be worried about someone finding her, but she’s pretty sure she maced some random guy that followed her already, and that kind of thing tends to spread.

The club music is still pounding, loud in her over-sensitive ears, even in the alleyway behind it. She isn’t sure what she took this time, something one of her friends handed her. It wiped her mind blissfully clean for a moment, free from all guilt and worry and little voices that never stopped, in the back of her head. The ones that asked when she was coming home, and why she’d left, and she rolls her head to the side with a groan. She can feel tears start to stream, but she knows it’s just the drugs. As much as she wants to quit right now, she knows it won’t hold. Making promises will only make her feel worse next time.

She opens her eyes again when something blocks out the neon lights that were shining through her eyelids. A man, tall and dark in a black suit that definitely didn’t fit the alleyway or the club. “Are you God?” She whispers, blaming the drugs. He smiles, and she stares at his teeth. They’re too sharp. “No, love. I’m Death.”

Her real rock bottom comes a month later though, with a mouthful of blood and her sire laughing behind her. Her world has been blood dens and parties for the past month, and she is immortal, and famous, and beautiful, and it’s all terrible. She still hates herself, and she knows none of the people she’s surrounded by actually care. It’s terrible.

The blood is fresh, but it tastes rotten, and the drugs stopped affecting her a week ago. Her sire explained that she would adapt to them more quickly, or something. She had stopped listening after two sentences, already working on trying out everything new.

She sinks to the floor, wiping at her chin with the back of her hand as she stares dully at the body in front of her. She misses home. She misses Kel. She misses her girls. She even misses Ella. She can’t go back though. She just can’t, and she crumples further to the floor, tears flowing. 

She’s a monster.

[hollytavarez]

keltontavarez‌:

“Alright.” Kel sat up, hands landing on his knees. He nodded once, then stood. “Tell me when you leave so I can let the girls run around again.” He said shortly, already turning away. 

“Uh, okay. I guess I’ll take off?” Holly said, unsure of whether or not she should stay. Or if he cared. Probably not.

[hollytavarez]

jackainsleyleighton‌:

“Hey maybe the feeling is mutual and that’s why they like to be difficult for you,” he replied as he went about fixing the remote. He didn’t mention how she was starting to sound old which was not only a young vamp, but younger than him too.

“I think it’s because they’re evil.” She said stubbornly. She wasn’t an idiot, she could probably figure it out if she really tried. Maybe. But Kel had always been good with it, so it worked out.

[hollytavarez]

jackainsleyleighton‌:

Jack smiled. “Do you want the honest answer? Or do you want a sugar-coated one?”

Holly groaned, letting her head drop back onto the couch. “I hate electronics.”

[hollytavarez]

keltontavarez‌:

He tried not to let his smile fade in such an obvious manner, but he couldn’t keep it up when he was hit with the sledgehammer reminder that Holly wasn’t his to love anymore. He leaned back with a sigh. “Well, anything else we need to talk about?” 

She had definitely said something wrong, but she wasn’t sure if it was calling him an insufferable dick, or just saying she still loved him. “Um, I guess not?”

[hollytavarez]

just-seraphina‌:

Sera giggled slightly. “I guess we do.” Her smile dropped slightly after that. “Though, honestly I have no idea where those are. So we might just be stuck watching…whatever this is.” She tilted her head curiously, watching the TV and trying to figure out what show was on.

“It’s trash.” Holly said, making a face. She knew she seemed like the type, but she’d never been a fan of soaps. And this was just a trashy one. “I guess I should figure out something else to do.”

[hollytavarez]

keltontavarez‌:

“Oooh,” Kel couldn’t even pretend to keep a laugh out of his voice. Even as a vampire, there was nothing intimidating about Holly. “I will poke fun at you as much as I want, and I feel you should expect that. Me not being an insufferable dick would be as disorienting as you not being a selfish bitch.” 

“I don’t know why I love you.” She huffed, leaning back with her arms crossed. “You really are an insufferable dick.” She did love him though. It was frustrating. He was adorable, even when he was telling her that she was a selfish bitch.

[hollytavarez]

keltontavarez‌:

“Wow, you just went from one extreme to another, didn’t you? I wonder how much it would take to make you snap. Would coffee deprivation be enough, or do I need to engage in some serious mind games?” It might of come out as a joke, but there was a hint of seriousness behind it. If this was going to work, he knew there had to be total honesty, even it made things uncomfortable.

“Touch my coffee and die.” She shot back, then sighed. “Look, I don’t know how to change, but I’m doing my best. Stop poking at me while I figure it out?” It was selfish to ask, but she was trying, and him poking at her made her really want to snap at him. Which she couldn’t do if she wanted to prove she’d changed.

[hollytavarez]

just-seraphina‌:

Sera smiled and took the remote from Holly. Without warning, she smacked the remote hard against her hand. Not hard enough to break it, just to know it around a little. “They taught me that sometimes the wires get a little loose inside. And just hit it around. Or we might have to go find new batteries.” She handed the remote back with a smile. “Give that a try.”

“Well, okay then.” Holly said, taking the remote and pointing it at the TV again. It still didn’t seem to be doing anything though. “I guess we need some batteries?”

[hollytavarez]

jackainsleyleighton‌:

“You know there was a time when there were only three buttons, but to go back to those days you have to get an antenna.” Jack took the remote from her. “On the bright side at least there is only one remote for this tv and not like the one in the other room.” When he looked down at the remote though, he noticed not only did she have the wrong remote but it was also on the wrong setting even if it had been the right one and it didn’t have any batteries. He looked back at Holly unsure if he should tell her or just fix it.

“Well that sounds dumb.” She said, making a face. She was positive the look on his face meant she was a moron, which was kind of accurate. “How bad did I fuck it up this time?”

[hollytavarez]

keltontavarez‌:

Her glare had no more weight than it ever had, and Kel kept on as if it wasn’t even there. “There’s a difference between being selfish and being honest about what you want, Holly. Unless you have selfish wants.”

“Everyone has selfish wants. That’s why they’re wants, and not needs.” She gave a shrug. “And I already told you what I want.” That wasn’t quite true, she did want more. She wanted her husband back, not just whatever he was planning. But that could wait, until he trusted her again.

[hollytavarez]

keltontavarez‌:

He stopped trying to hide the laugh. “Of course, and adults have to be boring and pathetic and not have a sense of humor and not have a voice of their own. That’s what it means to grow up.”

She definitely was not going to stop glaring at him, even if it had been so long since she’d seen him laugh. “Only when I’m trying to apologize. Why are you trying to make me be selfish again?”

[hollytavarez]

ellahalder-alpha‌:

“If you’re expecting me to believe you, you’re barking up the wrong tree.”

“I don’t expect you to believe me or forgive me.”

[hollytavarez]

lauragables‌:

Laura fixed her with an unimpressed expression. “Maybe next time you can deal with your issues quietly. You break something, you fix it. Sorry if you don’t like how it sounds.” She turned to go, but paused, and gave Holly one last look. “There’s some batteries in the fridge. If you need help remembering to breathe, ask someone else.”

“Thanks so much for all your help, sweetheart.”

[hollytavarez]

waldcns‌:

“Fine. Enjoy your Kardashians. Yell if you need me to fix anything else.”

“I will definitely do my best. Make sure you have something to do and all.”