If it exists, it has a horse in it

Analyzing horses and horsesque critters found in every video game that exists Unaffiliated with @horsesinvideogames , but do give them a look if you love horses

[horses-in-videogames]

Hello! You can call me Xu (any prnns) and I am here to analyze horses in videogames!

This is my first gimmick blog so things might be a bit janky at first but I intend to keep this going as long as I'm having fun with it. I post pretty sporadically, and queued posts come once a day if I have any.

This is all just for fun & remember everything I say is only my opinion

Feel free to suggest any horse, donkey, zebra, centaur, or other horse-like video game creature you can think of! The askbox is open for submissions until I figure out how to set up a submission form (if ever).

[wouldyoufuckthistaur]

funniest roswin trivia is im alterhuman and not even like. a centaur. certifiably hash tag Not On Brand

[horsefigureoftheday]

How many blogs in the horse gimmick sphere are alterhuman, I gotta know

[horses-in-videogames]

Sorry guys I took a nap

... what do you mean we're already a week into 2026

[horses-in-videogames]

Hardbone Hopper (Hollow Knight: Silksong)

Role: Enemy Type: Horsesque insect Size: Itty-bitty (bug sized) Rideable: No Pettable: No Cool fact: Can walk on semi-solid lava without issue

I know this thing is technically meant to be some sort of deer but it is a horse to me. I want 10 plushies of these things.

Honorary-horse score: 2/5 🪲🪲

Clips:

[horses-in-videogames]

Polle (Mouthwashing)

Role: Npc Type: Anthropomorphic horse Size: About human sized Rideable: No Pettable: No Cool fact: Nothing says "corporate mismanagement" more than having an over-enthusiastic mascot

I've got nothing on this guy, I just find it amazing that even a psychological horror sci-fi game manages to have a horse in it. Wonderful world we live in.

Horse Score: 3/5 🚀🚀🚀

No clips because he doesn't really do anything, he's just kinda there

[horses-in-videogames]

Horse(s) (The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild)

Role: Mob/Ally/Npc Type: Horse Size: Average Rideable: Yes Pettable: Yes Cool fact: Also available in pink & blue varieties

I am one of those weird people who got a switch & BotW just for the horses. In fact, I think this game was my first ever "horsegame", or at least a game with a significant amount of horses.

While the core function of these horses is transport, it's the details that make them truly shine: They have all 3 gaits, and even cleanly switch between them, they follow paths and avoid obstacles, and they show interest in you when you're nearby. The way they jump too feels fittingly clumsy for their build, and while I'm talking about jumping I just have to say I adore how they will only jump of their own volition. Having a jump button for a horse just completely breaks the immersion and it has become one of my pet peeves.

Horse score: 5/5 🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎

Gameplay:

[horses-in-videogames]

the "a pony" item from binding of isaac

A Pony (The Binding of Isaac)

Role: Ally Type: Manless horsehead Size: Small Rideable: Yes Pettable: No Cool fact: Able to float, which somehow makes it even more disturbing

Typically I would be incredibly concerned if someone had a literal horse head hidden in their basement, but somehow it's not even the weirdest thing Isaac can get his hands on. He can use the pony to fly over gaps and charge into enemies, which are two very normal things to do with a horse.

Horse score: 2/5 🐴🐴

Gameplay:

(I know this is from rebirth but they work the same)

[horses-in-videogames]

Orisa (Overwatch)

Role: Player/Enemy Type: Centaur robot Size: Big Rideable: Yes* Pettable: No Cool fact: National hero of Numbani

It's been years since I played OW1, but Orisa will always have a special place in my heart for being the first tank I mained. Even so I have to admit, she kind of sucks as a horse, she's only here on the technicality of being an ambiguous centaur. That, and how they butchered her kit in OW2, unfortunately make her the lowest scoring horse we've had (so far).

Horse score: 1/5 🐎

Clips:

[horses-in-videogames]

*:

Wow that's fucking hilarious. I think they started doing this in OW2 and that's why I missed it, thank you good citizen.

[horses-in-videogames]

Orisa (Overwatch)

Role: Player/Enemy Type: Centaur robot Size: Big Rideable: Yes* Pettable: No Cool fact: National hero of Numbani

It's been years since I played OW1, but Orisa will always have a special place in my heart for being the first tank I mained. Even so I have to admit, she kind of sucks as a horse, she's only here on the technicality of being an ambiguous centaur. That, and how they butchered her kit in OW2, unfortunately make her the lowest scoring horse we've had (so far).

Horse score: 1/5 🐎

Clips:

[horses-in-videogames]

That 2 days took a lot longer than expected but we're resuming regular scheduling tomorrow

[horses-in-videogames]

No horses for about 2 days while I'm busy elsewhere

[horses-in-videogames]

I know it is just a joke but the memetic "it has front facing eyes it is carnivorous" really annoys me, NO! front facing eyes are good for measuring distances between you and something in front of yourself, so it is a good feature for hunting, but for example humans have them because we evolve from the same tree as modern primates and our ancestors jumped from tree branches!

You are absolutely right, especially when it comes to real animals. However, in fictional horses specifically I'd say the joke has a some ground to stand on since horses already have half the skillset of a persistence hunter: maintaining good speed over a long distance. Most animals (that I know of) that both move fast and have good depth perception, need that to see what they're chasing. Real horses don't since prey animals benefit more from a wide field of view. So, when you put front facing eyes on a horse (or imply they have better vision in front, like the minecraft horse), you now have a horse with the same abilities as a wolf. Well, minus the teeth, but I think you catch the drift.

[horses-in-videogames]

Horse (Minecraft)

Role: Mob Type: Horse Size: Average Rideable: Yes Pettable: no Cool fact: Secretly two blocks wide

Sometimes, simple things are beautiful, like our rectangular fellow here. Minecraft has an interesting way of stripping many things into their minimum recognizable features and weaving them together like an abstract painting. A tree is a thing you break down into planks, a cow is a thing you get food and milk from, and a horse is a thing you put a saddle on to take you places. The only unsettling detail is these horses, when looking at the player, will face them directly, which can only mean they are... Carnivorous.

Horse score: 4/5 🐎🐎🐎🐎

Gameplay:

[horses-in-videogames]

Oleander (them's fightin' herds)

Role: Player/Enemy Type: Unicorn Size: On the taller side Rideable: No Pettable: No Cool fact: Has made a pact with the unspeakable

A unicorn who fights using black magic. Right up my alley.

Horse score: 3/5 🦄🦄🦄

Gameplay:

[horses-in-videogames]

hi!!!! could you maybe review kaithes from Warframe? they are very horse shaped (though I am still waiting for a horseframe :D)

Kaithe (Warframe)

Role: Ally Type: Uhhhhhhhhhhh... Alien horse...? Size: Average Rideable: Yes Pettable: No Cool fact: I got nothing. They look sick tho.

As little as I did play Warframe, I did get my hand on one of these buggers, and then had a blast running around Duviri. Not ground breaking as action game mounts often aren't, but they give Duviri Paradox a unique feel and that's neat. They can also fly which is something not all horses often do.

Horse score: 3/5 🐛🐛🐛

Gameplay:

[horses-in-videogames]

I recommend the horses of skyrim. I love using them to scale almost vertical cliff faces

Horse (The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim)

Role: Ally/npc Type: Horse Size: Average Rideable: Yes Pettable: Only when idle Cool fact: Not bound by the laws of physics

I just started playing Skyrim and I already love these chunky little things, I stole one and took her on a ride around a mountain. Their animations and gameplay are a mess but they technically check all the boxes of a perfectly good horse. I will probably mod them to oblivion so gotta enjoy the crust while it lasts. More in-depth review coming once I play a bit more, maybe.

Horse score: 4/5 🐎🐎🐎🐎

Gameplay:

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No post as I am consumed by a headache. Reminder to self to give queuing posts a try later