Horticulture Vulture

"You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think." - Dorothy Parker

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It's November so, you know, get your traffic cones in for spring.

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I lurked around Highgate Woods for a while today, feeling nostalgic for my youth and remembering days of glorious stoned unemployment here. I can't get enough of beech trees. I love the way the light filters through, and the colour change from spring to the deeper green of late summer.

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A favourite sight of mine in Globe Town, calling to mind a time when social housing schemes got things like statues and fountains.

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An innovative solution to dry shade or a prison for garden statuary, you decide.

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In a back street of Stoke Newington, the smallest, most personal and touching memorial garden I have seen. This wins the Hortivulture award for best use of a square yard.

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First conker of the year. You saw it here.

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This is not a home and garden picture posted just because it looks nice. I just fucking love apples and plums. Thank you summer. Your work is done.

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London Fields’ annual summer wildflower meadow causes sporadic outrage when kit is discovered that it is not a real wildflower meadow at all and requires occasional sprayings of glyphosate to keep the weeds down. But you’d have to be a far greater curmudgeon than I not to appreciate its charms.

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I think I found a giant chicken in the woods (of the fungal variety).

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Tyrrell's, what were your marketing department thinking?

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This broom smells amazing. Anyone in the vicinity of the Regents Canal at Mile End: go and sniff it now.

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A scene of horror in the garden. Pan has somehow caught a wood pigeon and is busily munching on it. I'm hiding inside.

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There's a mystery egg in the garden this morning. It's cool and damp with dew. I shake it and feel heavy liquid movement, hold it up to the light and see the colour in it change. What kind of an egg? It's half the length of my finger.

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Bluebell woods near London with friends exceeded all expectations.

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Flowers smell more at night, and what a time it is for lilac and wisteria.

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Working in a part of town with no good parks. I walked for 20 minutes today to investigate a promising green square on a map but found a large patch of lawn with cricket facilities. At least my garden is waiting for me back in Hackney.

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Courgette seedlings thrust into the light. Meaty, aren't they, and how cute is Pan?