별 보러 가자

yoo jihae, xxiv

[hsjihae]

[hsjihan]

come see me

[hsjihae]

@hsjihan​

“Hmm,” he doesn’t wait for a response. Jihan clicks on her profile to get a better look at her display picture. He wonders how she sounds like now, curious to hear what her voice would be like at this time of the night. He wonders if she’s heard his through the radio.

So he decides to call her. It’s impulsive but he’s sober and he’s sure that he won’t regret it. He sits on his bed, twisting the bed sheet beneath him as he waits.

By the time she’s detached herself from the comfort of her bed in favor of a glass of water, the small yellow number by her message is gone.  With it, the vague sense of restlessness.  She’s still not entirely certain what this means, but it’s not an unwelcome change either.  His names bears a great deal of happy memories-- what bittersweet, adolescent (stupid) feelings she’d ever harbored have long dissipated.  Thank god for that.

( kkt → 우지한 ) A little bird told me ㅎㅎ 2:21 AM

A flock of them’s more like it.  Nosy, chatty things.  Though she can’t say she’s any different.  She reaches for the jacket hanging by the door and slips it on, pushing the screen door open with some difficulty.  Maybe he’ll have a good remedy to fix it, but for now, she wrestles it shut and steps outside.  Midway through a sip of water, her phone buzzes twice, then begins to ring.  

“Hi.” Uncharacteristically succinct.  It’s punctuated by a huff of laughter, and then she’s kneeling down to feel blindly for her sandals.  “Sorry.  Should we stick with formalities?  Should I ask you how you’ve been?”  

Some part of her wonders if she sounds different to him now.  Another part hopes he hasn’t changed at all.  

“It’s been years, hasn’t it?”

[hsjihae]

one night in

[hsjihae]

@hscharoen​

“i’m about to be!” she says, moving back into the living room. “i gotta admit… i haven’t done anything artsy in a while; been wanting to get back into it. i mean, i DOODLE sometimes, but that’s just like what i used to do in school. do you only use paints or do you venture into other mediums?”

Spring cleaning is long overdue.  She makes note of this, tongue-in-cheek, knowing full well that it won’t happen anytime soon.  Tidiness hardly ever presents itself as a priority, especially when visitors are hard to come by.  Maybe one day she’ll come to her senses.  Maybe.

The glasses are set on a cleared spot on the counter.  “D’you want something to munch on?  I don’t have much...”  There’s a half-eaten bag of shrimp chips and some spotty bananas sitting in her basket.  She gestures towards them and grins sheepishly.  “...But help yourself.” 

Water containers, check.  Brushes, paper, check and check.  Giving her set-up a once over, she sinks onto the floor and wiggles her fingers for Charoen to follow.  “No judgement here.  I’m haven’t exactly been using the best materials for my work either.”  Being thrifty has its perks, though she supposes she could afford to be a little pickier about her paper (no complaints thus far though).

“But first...” Empty glasses shouldn’t remain empty for long.

[hsjihae]

@junghanhs​

“i’m trying,” he replies, nonchalant but just as annoyed. doesn’t occur to him that others are still waiting behind him, next to him, some minding their business, others increasingly fed up with him blocking the space. junghan steps back, the ground feeling a little funny on his heel, his back against someone instead of traffic. “shit, sorry,” he mutters, not sure to who. everything is loud, so maybe to nobody.

Here, news spreads more quickly by word-of-mouth than it does through the papers.  Secrets propagate from one house to the next, then to the most frequented storefronts-- by day’s end, nothing is left unshared.  It’s both a blessing and a curse, depending on who delivers it.  Jihae’s inclined to take most gossip with a grain of salt.

(Of course, that’s easier said than done.)

“There’s a new face at the market today.”  One of the mothers from the kindergarten informs her promptly upon arrival in lieu of a proper greeting.  She gestures none-too-discreetly towards the far end of the road and lifts her brows with a conspiratorial smile.  It’s enough to indicate what kind of face she means.  Pursed lips mean another woman, and more likely a young mother; an expression like this suggests otherwise.  

“Your mom seems to be in good spirits today, Seojun.” Hefting the cloth bag over her shoulder, she gives him an affectionate pinch on the cheek and steps closer to rummage through an unattended cart of vegetables.  Last night’s downpour had kept her awake, and she’s feeling under the weather today.  She’s looking forward to some peace and quiet after this.  “Yeonwoo’s mom complained about him last night.  He’s not particularly well-mannered.  City men.” The older woman sniffs, arms over her chest as Jihae pays and waves goodbye.  A grain of salt is the imperative here.

The strawberries this week are exceptionally sweet, or so she’s told.  She’s been looking forward to them ever since the message had been relayed throughout the neighborhood, steps hastening at the sight of a crowd up ahead.  Clearly, she’s not the only one.  A sharp elbow digs into her side, then the palm of a hand to her arm.  It’s not until someone steps onto her foot (hard) that she speaks up amidst the clamor.  “Hey-” A man.  An unfamiliar face at that.  She glances down at her white sneaker, now dirtied at the toe, and frowns.

“Watch where you’re going, would you?”  

[hsjihan]

come see me

[hsjihae]

@hsjihan

[...]

He immediately regrets messaging her. Jihan doesn’t remember the last time they spoke, and scrolls up to their chat history. February- they had exchanged brief new year greetings. He licks his lips, and-

( kkt → 유지해 ) How are you? 2:04 AM

“Your fates must be aligned.”  And the heavens must look fondly upon you both, she knows.  The saying’s circulated through the rungs of the local market over the years, passed down from one stall to the next and delivered to her with vague, knowing smiles.  At thirteen, she’d taken the message to heart-- now, she only hums, noncommittal.  Turns the apple over in one palm and inspects it for signs of bruising before reaching for another.  Only a beat later does she look up--

“--what?” Gomo’s smile only grows.  With one hand, she beckons her closer and lowers her voice to a soft, secretive hiss. “Jihan, dear.  I saw him with my own two eyes.”

She nearly drops her bag.

Her aunt sails on ahead, undeterred, now whistling cheerfully as they wander deeper into the throngs of people.  Jihae lingers behind, mind set adrift to memories she hadn’t bothered to revisit.  Jihan.  It’s been years since she’s heard his name.  She hardly remembers the last time they’d bother to do more than exchange formalities.  The thoughts follow for some time, through errands and over dinner.  By the time she’s settled down for the night, they’re set aside for a terse phone call with her boyfriend.  Ex-boyfriend.  She ends the call in a sour mood, only to be met with the chipper announcement of a new message.    

In the other room, soft snores traverse the thin walls.  Still, it’s quieter than Seoul- the sound of another message grates, unexpectedly loud.  She thumbs at the screen, rereads his texts over and over again.  Outside, the wind stirs, a faint breeze trickling in through her opened window.  She rolls onto her stomach and contemplates.

( kkt → 우지한 ) Could be better 2:15 AM

( kkt → 우지한 ) I heard you came back too? 2:16 AM

[hsjiseong]

『 check in ; check out 』

[hsjihae]

@hsjiseong

[...]

“I’m not hitting on you, I swear!” Jiseong raises both his hands to the sky, allowing his camera to dangle from the strap around his neck. “I’m just a photographer,” he says as if taking pictures of unassuming individuals enjoying their time at the beach was any less creepy.

Jiseong takes a healthy step back.

She’s reminded about a saying that begins with a snowball and ends with an avalanche.  The point is, all that’s needed is the proper amount of momentum for something to blow completely out of proportion.  

In this particular situation, she’s just the unfortunate bystander.  

Jihae allows him to ramble on until he’s able to collect himself, feeling more sympathetic by the minute (or confused? hard to say).  Lowers her pencils for the time being into her lap, close enough in case the situation begins veering towards an undesirable outcome.  At this point, she just wonders why he bothered approaching her in the first place.  Boys.

“Oh.”  Well, that’s slightly more reassuring.  Is it?  She’s had plenty of unfortunate encounters with ‘photographers’ online; there’s no telling he’s any different.  Summoning up an uncharacteristic amount of bravado, she waves him closer.  “Let’s see the pictures, then.”

[hsheeyeon]

boozy baking

[hsjihae]

@hsheeyeon​​

[...]

Let the record show that tipsy Heeyeon did not have the brightest ideas, and tipsy Heeyeon was a little more rude than her sober counterpart would ever allow her to be. She’d just have to apologize for it with her special clementine bings.  

She’s got a lot on her plate today, more literal than figure-of-speech.  Late-night cooking show binges tend to do that-- one episode in, her stomach issues a plaintive grumble, and her mind automatically begins running through the possibilities.  Sujebi?  Haven’t had that in awhile.  Or maybe some nice, hearty stew with the rest of the veggies she’d been meaning to deal with before they went bad.  An enticing photo of Vietnamese spring rolls lingers on the next tab.  ‘A simple yet delicious meal’, it promises in big bubbly font.

Instant ramen it is.

Once the pot’s on the stove, she hunches over the counter, taking a moment to clear her unread messages.  Two from Hyunjin, one from her new coworker ( “Excited to meet you!  Have a nice vacation  ^^b).  She’s just about to stow it away when her phone buzzes with an incoming message.  It’s Heeyeon.

Ah.  And drunk, it appears.  Jihae takes a moment to assess the situation (aka read the text again, not that it reveals any more than it did the first time).  She tears the seasoning packets open, dumps the contents in alongside the noodles and clears the counter for whatever chaos is bound to occur in due time.  By the time she transfers the finished product to a clean bowl, the doorbell chimes.  

“What’s on this week’s menu?” One hand pulls the door shut and promptly locks it; the other comes to a rest at Heeyeon’s elbow, steering her inside.  She takes a peek at her bag.  No additional clues, just the usual culprits.  Hmmm.  The glass of water’s nudged into her hands- a precaution, lest she suffer the consequences of a bad hangover tomorrow.

“I don’t know about you, but I’m starving.”

[hsjihae]

one night in

The list of clutter in the living room grows steadily by day: books abandoned where she’d last left them, mugs in every nook and cranny, stray socks wedged between cushions and beneath the sang. It’s a never-ending cycle of tackling messes and making them.  She’d recently decided to let the natural order of things fall into a progressive disarray.  Regret hits belatedly, long after Charoen steps foot into her house, and well into the good twenty minutes spent hastily digging through the boxes out front.

“Aha!” A hint of chipped plastic emerges from beneath two old magazines dated back to 2015.  At least the lid’s intact, though the same can’t be said for some of the pots inside.  Ultramarine blue’s been worn down to the pan, and there’s a sizable chunk of vermillion missing.  She makes a mental note to run down to The Islander this week; for now, they’ll just have to make do.

“There’s red wine on top of the fridge.” Jihae sets the palette down and fiddles with her speaker until Kim Minki’s voice creeps into the room, low and sweet.  Satisfied, she straightens up from her spot on the floor and ambles over to the kitchen to retrieve some cups.  “Feeling inspired tonight?”

@hscharoen​

[hsjiseong]

『 check in ; check out 』

[hsjihae]

@hsjiseong​

[...]

jiseong flashes a smile and says: “are you checking me out?”

the sentence dawns on him after he’s let it out into the open. fuck. fuck. fuck. abort. not only did he not do the right intonation for it to pass off as a joke he definitely sounds like a self-possessed ass wipe. f u c k.

Today’s itinerary is short and sweet: seafood ramen for lunch, then a quick trip to the market on her way home.  She leaves the house with a fistful of color pencils and a scrappy little sketchbook in her bag, with enough room for whatever she’ll decide on buying later.  Packing light does wonders for long bike rides.  (And saves you from the humiliation of landing face-first into the sidewalk.  In front of the kids from the kindergarten, too. She winces at the thought.)

Turns out she doesn’t have the stomach for an entire bowl of noodles, especially after a generous portion of juk hours before.  Hands patting absently at her uncomfortably bloated stomach, Jihae decides that an impromptu trek to the beach is in order.  She ditches the bike at the racks up front and makes the trip on foot, now content and very, very full.

Clear skies and the full presence of the sun means that she’s not alone-- it takes a good few minutes to find a secluded spot, but a lively crowd is perfect for a bit of sketching practice.  Her gaze wanders aimlessly, strokes loose and quick.  Soon, the blank page begins to fill-- first, with a little girl and her oversized bucket hat, then an older man stooping beside his retriever.  The rest comes easily, from the young woman in the billowy sundress to the man hefting a nice looking camera.  Who is now staring oddly at her.

She stares back.  Then she starts- is he checking me out?? Not that there’s much to see, anyways.  An old t-shirt and running shorts don’t do much for her figure.  Still, there’s something about his gaze that seems a bit...off.  And now he’s walking towards her-

He’s walking towards her?! Jihae automatically reaches into the bottom of her tote for the rest of the color pencils, prepared to fend him off if it comes down to it.  He wouldn’t try anything funny in front of children, would he?

He opens his mouth, and she’s stunned into silence.  Not that it lasts long, because she’s quick to retort- “Excuse me?”

[hsjihae]

when that door opens

Circa June ‘19.

At this time of year, the feverish heat is almost insufferable.  Shorts would have been a better option, but there’s only so much you can pack into a single carry-on.  The vast majority of her belongings are sitting in cardboard boxes somewhere; the rest will probably be thrown out too, but for now they’re buried in the back of his closet.  Her heart sinks at the realization and she hastens her pace, sandals slapping briskly on the pavement.  Stupid, stupid, stupid.

It’s been years since she’s come home, but not much has changed.  She passes the painted wall between the old convenience store and her school, still streaked in reds and oranges; the small playground and its winding, yellow slide; houses in dire need of renovation, yet left untouched as they had been for years.  Familiar sights that ease the uncomfortable weight she’s been shouldering for months now, like a much-needed breath of fresh air.  Someone calls her name.  She turns, eyes falling first on the well-loved neon pink cart, then to its owner.  Years have passed, but some things never change.

You’ll have to come over and feast tonight. Jihae loops their arms together and laughs. “It’s just me, Halmang.  Don’t go out of your way t-” The protest is cut short with a single look.  No use in arguing with her once she’s made up her mind.  

Hours pass, the small kitchen brimming with warmth, fond memories exchanged over bubbling pots and sizzling pans.  By the time she looks outside the window, evening’s set in slow and deep-- only a silhouette is visible as it approaches the front gate. Halmang wanders over and follows her line of sight. Eunho’s home. “Eunho,” she echoes. And smiles.

@hseunho

[hsjihae]

read the signals

Old habits have an uncanny way of sticking, stubborn in their own rights and needlessly so. Maybe it’s a matter of convenience. Or maybe it’s just laziness-- not having to make changes in favor of routine.  Jihae ponders over the thought as she autopilots all the way from the bookstore on the far end of the block. By sunset, Canola’s sign looms overhead, and she ducks inside to take her usual seat by the bar. 

“What’s today’s special?” The stool wobbles slightly, elbows plunked onto the counter to maintain balance.  She navigates the menu with practiced ease, scanning nothing in particular and knowing full-well that it isn’t necessary.  By the time she looks up, Jinjoo’s already placed a drink to her right (her usual, hot water with a generous spoonful of yuja cheong-- not exactly bar material, but the weather’s been especially dreary lately).

Heeding the wisps of steam, she lets it sit, taking a moment instead to survey the space.  Mostly familiar faces, which prompts a scattering of hellos.  Nothing to suggest that tonight will be any different from the previous weeks, until the door slides open and an unfamiliar face hovers uncertainly by the front.  Soon, he’s followed by another.  Two relatively young customers coming alone to a place like this can only mean one thing--

Jihae’s head whips back, the plasticky front page of the menu thwacking Jinjoo’s arm (lightly). “Tourists.”

 @hsjinjoo

[hsjihae]

y’all have no idea how excited i am to see this kick off i luv sol 🥺🥺 this is my baby jihae who is currently going through a quarter-life crisis... wish her luck,, here’s her bio, some info, and additional notes below!

recently quit her soul-sucking office job in the city and is now pursuing her true passion, which turns out to be illustrating children’s books! also just broke up with her longtime bf-- they’ve been dating for six years, so she’s uhhhh not taking it that well but it’s fine ha,,ha,,

*cute newly-single starving artist vibes*

jeju native, but her accent’s a bit wonky since they moved to seoul when she was a kid. still has it in her though especially when she’s mad :* big nature gal, will get rid of big scary bugs for u 

romantic at heart, honestly doesn’t know when to shut up! generally easy to like, unless u think l*ve is stupid and u hate people 👍

hangs out at homestay basically EVERY DAY like she has nothing better to do..which is sort of true since she’s taking a break from working atm

oldie at heart, has outdated music taste and is PROUD of it

fun plot ideas

childhood friends....eye emoji @ little forest 

tune in for love inspired relationship PL EASE,, or this

u volunteer at the kindergarten together!! u save her from the four-year-old bullies 👊

ur the annoying bf who happens to be in jeju for a work thing yikes

someone who competes w her to get the best fresh produce at the market, jihae: ᕦ(ò_óˇ)ᕤ 

u think she’s checking u out but she’s really just sketching u oops

ur the granddaughter/son of one of the halmangs that she goes on after-dinner walks with lol

anything and everything please humor me

[hsjihae]

[koreantunes]

Visit Original Link

[wrightedgar]

[soracities]

Marc says the suffering that we don’t see still makes a sort of sound — a subtle, soft noise, nothing like the cries of screams that we might think of — more the slight scrape of a hat doffed by a quiet man, ignored as he stands back to let a lovely woman pass, her dress just brushing his coat. Or else it’s like a crack in an old foundation, slowly widening, the stress and slippage going on unnoticed by the family upstairs, the daughter leaving for a date, her mother’s resigned sigh when she sees her. It’s like the heaving of a stone into a lake, before it drops. It’s shy, it’s barely there. It never stops.

Kim Addonizio, ‘The Sound’, Wild Nights: New and Selected Poems (via soracities)