fear and loathing @httphudson - Tumblr Blog

tfcalypso:

Calypso’s nerves racked throughout her entire form, her free hand gently playing with the straw of the juice-box. She had once again let her mouth get the better of her before she could accumulate a proper response in breaking the news to Hudson. Calypso could feel a thousand questions pulsating throughout her body on how he felt about the reveal, but instead she decided to keep her mouth tightly sealed before letting it get the best of her as it always did. Hudson wouldn’t want to see her, would he? His constant state of shock and the tension that built between the quiet air made her nerves grow more, himself only mumbling for a moment before stepping forward, her heart stopping momentarily. The situation was so tense that Calypso felt as if she was going to pass out any moment — as if she was barely holding herself together. “Of course you can see her.” She breathed out silently in relief as well as worry of how Charlotte would interact with Hudson, as well as how Hudson would react as well as interact with finally seeing their child. Taking a few steps backwards towards the room, Calypso forced her feet forward as she quickly whipped herself around and ignored the curious gazes from his teammates before walking into the room that her, or well their, baby girl rested. A large smile quickly overtook the childs features, Charlotte bouncing up at the sight of her mother. “Mommy!” Calypso smiled gently in return as she entered the room, handing Charlotte the juice she had requested. “Hi baby girl.” She simply stated as the girl quickly took the juice, mumbling a thank you shortly after her first sip out of the container. “I have someone I want you to meet, Charlotte. This is Hudson.” Calypso moved her daughters shoulders so that she was facing the direction of her father, Charlottes dough-like eyes looking to the male. “Hi…” she shyly replied, her face cowering behind her juice as she looked at the boy.

Standing there with his ex, the woman he thought was the one when they spent all of high school together, filled him with a sense of hope. Was it really just coincidence that they ended up at the same hospital in all of New York? Hudson chose to think otherwise, but he couldn’t express those feelings in that moment. Not with the sudden revelation that his daughter, their daughter was mere steps away. Hudson breathed out in relief when she approved of him seeing Charlotte, but he tingled with nerves as he followed Calypso into the room, keeping quiet during the mother-daughter interaction. It was something he imagined years ago, when both of them were still wrapping their minds around the idea of parenthood, before the split. Hudson couldn’t help but smile though, the four-year-old resembling her mother more than anyone. Their little girl. Though, when Calypso introduced him as Hudson, his heart fell to his stomach. Of course, a father figure couldn’t be sprung onto a child out of the blue but that didn’t stop the hurt he felt, as if he wasn’t her father at all. Still he managed a wave and a smile, analyzing Charlotte’s features to find any resemblance of himself. “Hi, Charlotte,” he spoke, the slightest hint of hesitance in his voice. Hudson patted his pockets to check if he had anything to give her, stealing a glance at the door that led back to the hall and his team’s table. “I don’t have one on me right now, but I could probably swipe you a teddy bear soon.” Considering he was meeting his daughter in a hospital of all places, he looked back to Calypso for answers. “What happened?”

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#[ pic ]#[ pic:hudson ]#[ pic:calypso ]#lOOK AT THEM

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Once a smile finally graced the boys lips, Calypso realized how much she had truly missed seeing him. Of course part of her wondered what would have happened, what could have been, if she wouldn’t have left him in the midst of her teenage terror, but that was something that would always go unanswered. She had taught not only herself, but Charlotte as well to never dread what could have been, but here she stood battling her very own lesson as she looked up at Hudson once she’d retrieved the juice box. “You didn’t need my support — I knew as much as everyone else that you could accomplish it all by yourself, Hudson. I’mean, look at you now.” She gestured to his uniform, as she put the straw into the juice box for Charlotte so that she could just hand it off to her, knowing that the youngster would be anxious for it once she’d gotten back into the room. However, upon hearing him mention someone visiting the room for Charlotte, Calypso froze in place for a moment as her smile faltered before quickly lacing her lips with the familiar gesture. “Um — no actually, no one has yet. You guys hadn’t reached her room yet I don’t think. You um..” She stumbled over her words as she fiddled with the juice box. “It’s her. Or well — she’s a baby girl, Hudson.” She nervously stated, hoping that she wouldn’t have to address who it was directly, but knowing deep down she had to before Hudson got suspicious. “The girl I’m with is your daughter — you’re the father. Her names Charlotte and she’s four.” She sighed, feeling rather nervous with the reveal as she backed away towards the room a bit, hearing the faint name of mommy being called.. “I know this seems pretty sudden and I’m sorry if I’m scaring you but, like, I just feel like you should know ‘cause my intent was never to keep you from seeing her.”

httphudson

Hudson’s mouth open and shut like a fish out of water, trying to formulate the right response. He wanted to say if he didn’t need her support, he sure wanted it. He was close to blurting out that he missed her support, that he missed her. “It helped,” he mumbled, the only sensible thing coming to mind. Noticing the twitch in her smile when talking about the mystery patient, Hudson wondered if he crossed a line not meant to be crossed. Maybe she was with a child that had a different father, and if that were true, Hudson would probably send for someone else to visit. The way she became nervous only spread to him, unsure of what she was getting at until the truth came out. Calypso was the mother of a little girl, and Hudson the father. He thought he had plenty of questions before but now that he knew some of those answers, more flooded his mind. Hudson’s daughter, his child, was just a few steps away the entire day and he didn’t know until now. Too many emotions ran through him that he ended up with a blank stare and flat line for a mouth. Four years. Four years of not knowing what happened to Calypso or the little girl named Charlotte. Four years that child had to go without a father, and four years that father went without a daughter. “I, um,” he started, rubbing the back of his neck as what he assumed was Charlotte’s voice interrupted. Slowly he stepped toward Calypso and the room. Hudson wanted to see Charlotte, even if it was just a glimpse. He needed to. “It is...pretty sudden, um, am I...allowed to see her?” Hudson asked, his gaze shifting from Calypso to the room.

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tfcalypso:

Watching as Hudson lifted his hand to place on her, he quickly battled that idea mentally before swooping it through his hair, Calypso feeling rather awkward now as he stumbled over his words and appeared just as uncomfortable as she was. She was nearly positive though that this had to be more awkward for her considering she was the one that had left without saying goodbye, running away with their child, which at this moment in time she was nearly positive he had forgot she had. Did he even know before? All Calypso knew was her judgement was clouded and all she could do was offer another small smile in hopes of loosening the awkward tension that floated between the two. “I can see that. I always knew you would make it big, y’know.” She retorted, taking a look at the uniform he was clad in momentarily before looking back up at his face, her heart shattering again as she looked at the boy she clearly never got over. As he spoke again however, Cal’s heart dropped momentarily as he mentioned just forgetting it, but she knew that would never be the same. Now with knowing that team he was playing for regardless of forgetting this moment, Calypso would always find herself keeping tabs on him and she was aware of the fact herself. “Oh — well actually, I need to get a juice really quick for someone. They’re just right over there in a fridge.” Calypso pointed in the direction, happy it wasn’t far away considering they were on a children’s floor. “Maybe you’d want to take this incredibly long walk with me to get it?” She let an effortless and real laugh fall from her lips before she could stop it, beginning to back away from the fridge in small hopes that he would follow.

Hudson had so much to say to her, so much to ask her. No words came from him though. She did leave, and just when things seemed to be so right for them. They had so much positive history behind them and a bright future--a future as a family--ahead of them, but that changed when she disappeared. If others knew where Calypso had gone, they kept that information from Hudson. He was willing to give up everything back then, so long as they stayed together. And if his gut was pointing him in the right direction, one of the kids on that floor was not only Calypso’s but his as well. Hudson avoided those conclusions as much as possible seeing as the only person who would know what happened to their supposed child was Calypso. “Yeah, well, I have you to thank for that. Y’know, for pushing and supporting me all those years,” he nodded slowly, unsure if bringing that up was appropriate. Forgetting this moment was the last thing on his list, in fact, if he never saw her again he’d remember this for as long as possible. Hudson glanced in the direction she was pointing, spotting the stack of juice boxes in the fridge. A smile finally graced his lips when he heard her laugh, like music to his ears. “Yeah, sure.” He had agreed, but his legs didn’t function until she was already away from him, forcing him to catch up with her. “So...has someone from the team visited whoever you’re getting juice for?” the blonde asked as they approached the fridge. His curiosity had taken over about who she was here with. Heck, she could be here with a sibling and that thought caused Hudson’s heart to sink. If it wasn’t who he thought it was behind the curtain, he wouldn’t know of any other way to get Calypso back by his side.

#[ gif para ]#LITERALLY A MONTH LATER #DO YOU HATE ME

tfcalypso:

This was what Calypso had dreaded the thought of ever since the day she had left him without saying goodbye — when she had made it her mission to move to New York after graduation, somehow escaping what reality had to offer. If you would have asked the brunette years ago, she would have said that her future entailed Hudson and nothing but Hudson, but that had turned out to be far from the truth, and now standing with her new version of reality, with the old face that she had left her heart with back at home, she was at a complete loss of words. Calypso had promised herself that she would never hold Hudson back from the dreams he wanted to accomplish, and thankfully, that had paid off. So even with that information, why did Cal feel such an intense throbbing pain within her heart as he made his way over, his baffled self finally squeezing out her name. “It is you. I’m just — wow. You look absolutely wonderful it’s so nice to see you.” She awkwardly replied, placing a gentle smile on her lips as she shifted her weight uncomfortably. Calypso noticed a few of his teammates eyeing them skeptically from afar, herself clearing her throat in attempts to rid the lump that had now placed itself in it, but her efforts were useless. She just couldn’t bring herself to believe that this was really happening. “How have you been?” Cal’s eyes darted from Charlottes hospital room back to Hudson, awaiting a reply to break the awkward silence that was lingering between the tension.

Never in a million years would Hudson believe he’d see Calypso again, yet here they were by some freak coincidence. So many thoughts, questions, and emotions filled up that he didn’t know where to begin and was stuck gaping in disbelief at the brunette before him. It tore him apart when she left, not that he would ever admit that aloud. Truth of the matter was that he hadn’t formed any other kind of relationship after she left him, he couldn’t see himself happy with anyone but Calypso. Her smile, always breathtaking to Hudson, caused him to melt just as he did when they were teenagers. She had been everything to him; heck, she still was everything to him. “Yeah, um, it’s great to see you too. You look amazing, I mean...yeah.” He tripped over his words, lifting a hand to place on her shoulder until he remembered their situation and awkwardly set his hand in his hair, combing once through. His heart was pounding a thousand miles an hour, and if she couldn’t hear it beating against his chest, she’d sure be able to feel it. “Um, yeah, I’ve been great. Made it big, so y’know, that’s fun.” Hudson smiled but his gaze quickly followed hers as he asked her the same question, quickly retracting it for a different one. “Am I keeping you from someone? We can catch up another time, or forget this happened. Whichever you want, Cal.” Saying her name came so easy despite the pain he felt the prior years without her by his side. It made him question if he ever really got over her in the first place, and he was sure the answer was no.

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tfcalypso:

All it took was for Charlotte’s dough like eyes to pout in the direction of Calypso for a moments time for her to become putty in the child’s hands. As she laid in the hospital bed after an allergic reaction, Calypso found herself thankful that it hadn’t gotten serious — the reaction caught just in time. The petite yet adorable bundle that wrapped itself in the blankets smiled as her mother sighed in defeat, getting up and pointing a teasing finger at her daughter. “You owe me for this juice. I want three gummy bears in return when we get home.” Calypso smiled warmly at her child as she giggled — it had always been this way. Despite her sleep deprivation at attempting to juggle so many things at once, including successfully raising a child by herself, the two would always banter and the smile she was rewarded with was always the greatest gift. As her feet swiftly carried her out of the room in order to get a juice, apple to be specific, Calypso noticed a charity being held, herself smiling at the thought as she watched multiple players clad in red bulls uniforms make a child’s day. As she watched all of them for a moments time as she continued to walk, one boy made her stop as she squinted her eyes, the face looking all too familiar, and when she realized who it was her heart stopped — no, it couldn’t be. “Hudson?”

The charity event at the hospital was Hudson’s first as a member of the Red Bulls, his hard work and determination finally paying off. Soccer was his only focus. It had been a part of his life from the moment he could walk and he was now living his dream of playing professionally. Of course, success never came easy. Striding through the halls of the hospital, he and a few of his teammates checked out every room to make sure no patient went unnoticed; for it was their duty that day to brighten someone’s life even if only for a few minutes. As they scoured the rooms, their usual banter and inside jokes echoed against the bleak halls and it wasn’t until they joined the rest of the team that the event really began. Hudson shot a smile and wave to any patient passing by, and those who wanted an autograph — even though he was the newest player on the team — were given one. Everything was going according to plan until the blonde heard his name at somewhat of a distance. His head turned to face the voice, and in that moment, Hudson felt time stop. It couldn’t have been her. Out of all the places for them to meet again, a hospital? Excusing himself from the group, Hudson tried to be as calm and collected as possible when nearing the girl who had stolen his heart back in high school. He stammered over her name, a simple syllable even too difficult for his baffled self. “Cal?”