Things Everyone Should Know About Using ๋ฐ๋ง
Iโm making this post just to address one of my biggest pet peeves in Korean: people using ๋ฐ๋ง the wrong way. Yes, itโs hard to pick up ๋ฐ๋ง and ์กด๋๋ง right off the bat, but using ๋ฐ๋ง incorrectly is so incredibly rude. Until you understand politeness levels you should avoid using ๋ฐ๋ง, and once youโve learnt them itโs important to make sure you know it properly.
Common Misconceptions
#1: ๋ฐ๋ง is โcasual speakโ and ์กด๋๋ง is โformal speakโ.
The difference between ๋ฐ๋ง and ์กด๋๋ง is not the level of formality, but the level of respect. While this sounds like the same thing, itโs important to note because using ๋ฐ๋ง or ์กด๋๋ง does not depend on the setting (hanging out vs at work), but who youโre speaking to (your friend vs your boss).
#2: ๋ฐ๋ง is supposed to be used between friends.
I believe this misconception is from a mix of the previous one and a mistranslation of ์น๊ตฌ. ์น๊ตฌ does NOT mean friend.ย A ์น๊ตฌ is someone that is your same age. (More on this in a future post) ๋ฐ๋ง has nothing to do with friendliness and everything to do with age, respect, and politeness.
When Can I Use ๋ฐ๋ง?
You canย onlyย use ๋ฐ๋ง with someone if:
(( 0. You are speaking to a child (unless the child is of a higher position, such as your customer) ))
ย You are not complete strangers (itโs not necessary to be friends, just introduced), and
You are older than them, (technically you donโt need to be introduced in this case but using ๋ฐ๋ง right off the bat makes you look like an ass), or
You are of a higher โpositionโ than them (such as being their boss, teacher, senior, etc. same stuff applies as above), or
You are both the same age or โpositionโ (such as starting work or school at the same time) and you both agree to use ๋ฐ๋ง, or
You are younger and/or in a lower โpositionโ, but they give you explicit permission to use ๋ฐ๋ง with them, and you decide to take the invitation (note it is rude to ask to use ๋ฐ๋ง with an older/higher person; they must mention it first.)
Itโs perfectly normal to have a friendship where the older person uses ๋ฐ๋ง but the younger person uses ์กด๋๋ง. Itโs also perfectly normal for both parties to use ๋ฐ๋ง, or even to both use ์กด๋๋ง. It just depends on the relationship and peopleโs preference.
However, you CANNOT use the SAME ๋ฐ๋ง with an older/higher position person that they would use with you. There is a different ๋ฐ๋ง that you must use with older/higher people. Koreans will probably excuse you using the wrong ๋ฐ๋ง with them because you are still learning the language, but donโt use peopleโs understanding as an excuse to be rude.
Using ๋ฐ๋ง With An Older Person
As we already know, here are the main differences between ๋ฐ๋ง and ์กด๋๋ง (informal)ย
Sentence endings: ํด vs ํด์
Question endings: ํด?, ํ๋?, ํ๋? vs ํด์?, ํ๋์?
โYouโ: ๋ vs ๋น์ , ๊ทธ์ชฝ, honorifics, etc
โMeโ: ๋ vs ์ ย
ย And ๋ฐ๋ง for older/higher people:ย
Sentence endings: ํด (the same)
Question endings: ํด?ย (ํ๋? and ํ๋? are for younger or same age only)ย
โYouโ: honorifics ONLY (๋น์ can be used as an honorific between married couples.)ย
โMeโ: ๋ (the same)
Examples (๋ฐ๋ง vs ๋ฐ๋ง for older)
A) ๋ ์ค๋ ๋ฐ์๋? vs ์ค๋น ์ค๋ ๋ฐ๋น ? Are you busy today?
B) ๋ ๊ทธ๊ฑฐ ์ง๋ฆฌ์ง๋ ์๋? vs ์ ๋ฐฐ๋ ๊ทธ๊ฑฐ ์ง๋ฆฌ์ง๋ ์์? Donโt you get tired of that?
Itโs simple as long as you know about it.
TL;DR:ย DONโT use ๋ or ํ๋?/ํ๋? with ANYONE that is OLDER than you.
I cannot stress enough how incredibly rude it is to call someone older than you ๋. You can use it to start a fight. Even in a fight Koreans wouldnโt go that far. Itโs so rude itโs absurd. Inconceivable. One of the worst things you could ever say to someone. Every time you call someone older than you ๋, King Sejong kills a kitten. Educate yourself today. Save the kittens.
reblog to add that ์ผ (as in "hey" or "you") is also something you should only say to someone younger than you
