Carpe Scream

[couldimaybehaveeliotback]

hi if you don’t think eliot waugh would deck a cop for free and for FUN you can leave!!! we all know that man says acab with his whole chest

[michaeladavenport]

Michael A Davenport, 3,090 Degrees Fahrenheit (Oil on canvas, 2025)

30in x 48in

[whatbigotspost]

What I wish I could get people who didn’t grow up in highly controlled, abusive environments to understand is that when the very people who are forming you are really fucked up and bad, you are FULLY incapable of knowing that as a kid.

You’re not capable of “damn my dad is really not ok” or “mom is toxic” for a long time. It’s years and years of “this is life. That is my dad. That’s my mom. It’s just how it is.” It often takes PAINFUL moments of realization to get to even questioning if your life isn’t normal. In fact, in my experience, it takes many painful moments to eventually get you there. Someone at school making fun of your parents, for example. Or some outside caring adult noticing things they seem worried about w/ you. Or a particularly extreme incident of abuse that shakes you. Or reading/hearing someone recount abuse they survived and you get the sick realization it’s like a mirror for you.

When your primary caregivers are your means of survival, your brain wraps you in many many many protective layers of denial and whatever the fuck else it needs to so that you can get through it. Many folks like myself will spend more time healing ourselves as adults from our childhood than we spent in the childhood of trauma itself.

Also, let’s be real, an implication I’m making here is that a lot of folks don’t even pick at the thread of “was I abused?” because it’s too overwhelming all together. Or even “was my childhood kinda fucked up?”

Spoiler alert. If your childhood was kinda fucked up, it’s better, in the long run, to acknowledge and address that. Anyway, this is my characteristically long winded way of wanting to recommend some books on the subject that I have found deeply relatable and meaningful:

•Jeanette McCrurdy’s memoir I’m Glad My Mom Died: If you’d be up for an unflinching look at a deeply difficult childhood that includes physical, sexual, and emotional abuse and neglect and disordered eating in the Disney-universe, this is your read. Thinking about what McCurdy has had to overcome chills me to my core but the feelings she shares in words felt deeply relatable and I know they will help many.

•Ashley Ford’s memoir Somebody’s Daughter: I’m biased to love her because she’s a fellow Hoosier but you will love her too. Incredibly well written and deeply moving, Ford’s memoir covers her childhood with an abusive mother, a father in jail for rape, and survivorship of her own rape, as well as her place thriving now. She offers us such meaningful processing of her story. (And just writing style wise, this one is a mega fave.)

•Grace Cho’s memoir Tastes Like War: this one is a deep dive into Cho’s upbringing with a mother (who like one of my parents) has schizophrenia. I found her account of having a first hand seat to a parent’s mental health decline too relatable. The components of her story that focus on her mom’s experience of war and immigrating from Korea and the role that Korean food plays in their lives, are moving beyond words.

•Tara Westover’s memoir Educated: having been raised in a very isolated, survivalist Mormon family and tiny community in Idaho, Westover shares her personal story of a quest for escape and education. Although my family was nowhere nearly so unusual and isolated as Westover’s, I feel what she chronicles will highly resonate with anyone raised by someone who seeks to keep you away from “mainstream influences” or who is any level of survivalist.

Obviously, these are heavy reads and DO NOT check them out if you don’t feel in the right headspace. Each one moved me to tears multiple times. But if your awful/strange childhood and leaving it (them) behind makes you feel alone trust me YOU ARE NOT ALONE ❤️

I also recommend these reads for anyone who wants to see at an anecdotal level what are experiences of people raised in highly abusive environments and/or raised by parents struggling with mental illnesses and/or people raised in high control situations. Chances are you know/love someone who fits that description and you may gain helpful insights.

[bogleech]

How people can mistakenly think or just subconsciously feel food works: there are “unhealthy” foods like pizza or fried chicken and “healthy” foods like fruit salad or steamed vegetables. Every time you eat an “unhealthy” food you’ve harmed yourself in some way.

How food actually works: foods contain carbs, proteins, fats, sugars, vitamins, minerals, fiber and/or other nutrients. Your body needs and uses all of them but it would like to have a little of everything every day. If you ate pizza or fried chicken for lunch then that’s probably your fat and protein for the day with extra that your body will make use of in time, so it’s a good idea to make your next meal something different like that fruit salad or steamed veggies. You can have that fatty lunch every single day if you just maintain balance and stay active enough to actually use what you’re stocking up on because foods aren’t “good or bad;” they just either fit into the rest of your diet and lifestyle or they don’t.

[augustdementhe]

Thanks, OP. 

[zombolouge]

also your body doesn’t necessarily work on a daily cycle, it’s not so neat as to understand linear time and how we choose to divide it. You don’t have to try and find perfect balance every single day, sometimes you will go three or four days eating less or eating more. Sometimes you will crave fats or salts or sugars or greens for a few days at a time before your body will decide it’s gathered enough resources in one particular department. The balance is achieved over time and in uneven tides, and that’s good and fine.

[bogleech]

Original post has been going around for years now but this fairly recent addition is a really good one I needed to be reminded of too. We don’t just reset to 0 every night.

[sirfrogsworth]

The short answer is... a tilt-shift lens.

The slightly more complicated answer is... Mister Rogers.

Depth of field is the area in front and behind your chosen focus point that remains in focus and then slowly gets blurry as you get farther away.

Shallow depth of field only has a narrow slice of the image in focus and gets blurry super quick. This is caused by a large lens aperture and being close to the subject.

Deep depth of field can extend through the entire picture if your aperture is small and you are super far away.

Usually the depth of field lines up with the image sensor of your camera. So if it is tilted forward, the plane of focus matches.

The stuff outside the green area would be blurry. The edges of the green would be slightly blurry. And the dashed green line would be the sharpest area of the photo.

But the tilt-shift lens allows you to create chaos with your plane of focus. In most cases, you would use this to flatten the depth of field so you can get a 2D plane entirely in focus.

If you were to use a normal lens, the bottom left and top right would be blurry.

But with a tilt-shift lens you can do this.

The green area is taking a little nap on the floor.

However, there is an unintended side effect created by this lens. (The "Scheimpflug intersection" if you want to go down the rabbit hole.) You can choose absolutely wacky planes of focus that create a very narrow depth of field over a geographically large area.

Believe it or not, this is when psychology comes into play.

And possibly Mister Rogers.

Our only reference for such a large area having a shallow depth of field is our memories of miniatures on TV. So Mister Rogers and Thomas the Tank Engine trained our brains to see this effect as... small.

Depth of field shrinks the closer you are to something. And when filming miniatures, you are placing the lens close to the scene. But the scene represents something big in our minds. We buy the effect, but not 100%. That blurriness wouldn't be there at a regular scale. So our subconscious remembers we are watching small things pretending to be big. It just files that away in the back of our mind.

And then when we see something like this...

Our brain is all, "Look at all that tiny shit!"

Without Mister Rogers, our brains may have never made these connections and tilt-shift photography may just make us wonder why everything is all blurry. That connection to past experience is vital for this effect to be convincing.

Brains are neat.

[theothersarshi]

This is an awesome explanation, but I've never watched Mister Rogers because of Different Country, and that photo still looked like a miniature to me.

[fawnmisty]

In an alternate universe they're university professors and married I saw it in the wild rune

[dearopheliaimsorry]

While doing my Leverage rewatch, I've also been going to YouTube to rewatch the gag reels! Y'all it's so fun! (I've also been rewatching some amazing fan videos, like the skill of some people is ridiculous).

I may post some more gag reel moments in the future, but for you viewing pleasure, I present this goofy skit done by our favs!

(Also, thank you for all the love on my last post and the constructive criticism, ahaha, it's all appreciated 💖)

[bluedrifting]

[scleroticstatue]

I want a Leverage episode where the whole con is based around a lockpicking competition. And because Parker needs to actually be there picking the locks and cracking the safes, she cannot be the person playing the lockpick/safecracker. And that is the whole premise.

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