Phine, thanks...

No PHUN intended.

[onlytwitterpics]

[marbleplant-deactivated20140601]

[zodiaccity]

Dealing With Zodiac Taurus

- Taurus are not complicated people (in theory) but what often complicates things is their desire to want or need things without expressing it in a cohesive or thorough way. 

- They have to see the benefit in doing certain things before they do it. This is why they may tell you they don’t want to do something, even if you think it’s a great idea or suggestion. Simply put, they’re not trying to waste their time!

- Their devotion to the people they love will never waiver… unless the ultimate betrayal is displayed. And because they love so hard, they’re hurt easily by selfless actions.

- When they want to be in their “zone”, leave them be. If they want to watch television or listen to music by themselves, don’t be an idiot and invade their personal space.

- They become more territorial the deeper a relationship gets. Not to the point of trying to control your every move, but wanting to have you more to themselves…. so to speak.

[inkskinned]

HOW TO BE A WOMAN; a style guide based on  things I have genuinely seen on the internet:   CLOTHING: 1. jeans are so cute they show you’re a laid-back kind of girl 2. don’t wear jeans, they’re so lazy 3. DO wear jeans, just not high-waisted ones 4. but never sweatpants 5. unless you’re not wearing underwear (cute winky face)  6. a sweater is fine if you’re half naked, else it’s bulky 7.  dress tasteful, dread the curse that no one will marry you 8. but don’t dress like a prude, fear the reality no one will want you 9. also don’t wear makeup or like fashion because it’s shallow 10. but always be wearing makeup and nice clothes 11. going shopping for new clothes - dumb girls, am i right? 12. but having the same four shirts is legitimately posion 13. crop tops are in 14. and also one of the sixteen traits men HATE that are happening 15. spaghetti straps are way too alluring, bake alive in the summer 16. you don’t deserve cheap but durable clothing, it is a myth  17. and on that note, so are pockets    BODY: 1. you’re not a woman without curves! 2. but like in all the right places  3. not like thin-thin but like thin 4. like be a victoria’s secret model is what we’re saying 5. actually you know what try not to have any body whatsoever, we much prefer a glowing orb of cotton candy and glitter    BEHAVIOR: 1. be confident! 2. well actually men like women who show weakness 3. thirty, flirty, and thriving 4. but actually you should be twenty-five and modest and a housewife 5. know how to cook, clean, and sew 6. and also watch sports, change your own engine, and drive a truck 7. the strongest woman lets a man help her!  8. but really honey when will you clean up the house a little 9. be passionate, be charismatic, be fun 10. but don’t overwhelm him with your obssession, it’s gross 11. and don’t be an attention seeker, save the charm for in private 12. also above all don’t be crazy! follow his lead in adventures 13. speak your mind  14. never do that i lied 15. go out there and find your own guy, there’s no prince charming 16. just kidding the guy you picked is trash all girls love jerks 17. apologize before asking questions or speaking or when existing 18. friendly reminder from an old guy that apologies are a weakness 19. be cute and mysterious: have issues that your partner can solve 20. wait we just realized having real problems isn’t actually cute at all 21. like, you know, let him save you, but don’t be, like, mentally ill 22. also, save him, he is a sad protagonist 23. be funny but never as funny as the guy in the room  24. the real kind of beautiful is unconventional 25. here are sixteen supermodels who look nothing like that 26. kissing girls is only acceptable if a man is present to watch  27. your behavior when drunk isn’t concerning, it’s vine-worthy 28. nobody will help you, you got yourself into this mess 29. say no to food, to sex, to drugs, to liquor, it’s crass to have fun 30. do not write feminist poetry you will get your own reddit thread 31. but don’t be afraid express yourself, make a splash 32. oh god not like that  33. being single is okay as long as you’re straight and pretty 34. everything you do, say, think, or feel will be judged to an extent that you will have to question your own motives and behaviors before engaging in them 35. but go out there, have some fun! it’s great to be a woman!

Pro tip: usually when a straight guy gives you advice on how to be a woman, he’s not telling you to help you. He’s telling you to help himself. [A list I could never finish] // r.i.d (via inkskinned)

[best-of-memes]

[jodiefoster]

do you ever read way too much into something and get your feelings hurt and it’s like for the love of god are we really doing this again

[notchicken]

[thediaryoflaurapalmer]

[vojun]

[charminglyantiquated]

okay listen up motherfuckers because I am going to tell you a story.

everyone on tumblr is inordinately fond of bad taxidermy for no discernible reason so of course we have all seen some of the all-stars in that category and I am no exception

and one day my swedish host parents take me to the national portrait museum, which is this tiny little castle full of portraits, because what did you fucking expect

answer: I did not expect to find a long passageway on the top floor leading to a dusty attic room, and staring through the dusty haze, I could see this majestic son of a bitch:

and I knew what I’d find. I knew.

as I drew closer my host mom said in this tiny voice full of shame, ‘oh. that’s the … lion’

and the doubt in her voice was well deserved because it has a kingly profile but the poor fucker was stuffed by a man who had never seen a lion before and the end result is this:

(I found it in a better light on google)

so basically I spent the rest of the day bursting into peals of slightly hysterical laughter because the entire country is so ashamed of this goddamn thing that they shoved it away in the attic like your mother’s old eighties sweaters and tried to forget it ever happened without actually throwing it out, because that would be rude.

[altamaranempire]

Visit Original Link

if you EVER need to cheer up a friend, send them ‘careless whisper’ played badly on sax accompanied by photos of awful taxidermy animals serenading them with jazz instruments:

[gayasscommie-deactivated2017090]

[i-am-phine]

"Reverse rasism"

[heartsnmagic]

[honted]

i walked in on my 4 year old nephew sitting alone on his bed eating grapes in the dark and i didn’t even get a chance to say anything before he said “i don’t have answers”

[perfuckedtion]

Today I’m wearing a lovely shade of I slept like shit so don’t piss me off

[thezodiacvibes]

Find out which zodiac sign you should date next here

[nentindo-deactivated20210501]