bailed
you finally said things I liked, said don't worry I'll come over when I really wasn't asking. you wanted to see me and it made me feel so happy. confidence. hope. for those hours I felt good about you and I and myself. I cleaned. I got stoned with my friends. I decided not to masturbate because I knew I was going to see you. then you bailed. you fucking mean person. you literally crushed me. Like fuck I wasn't expecting that. "I can't wait to see you tomorrow though" you say. I mean ya sure I was excited for tomorrow but more excited that you were excited to come see me tonight. unplanned. you said you had a surprise. it felt exciting and real. but this is real huh? this feeling right now.









