Swigity Swag

A lonely child. Overly passionate about Radio. Professional morning person.

[just-shower-thoughts]

Shrek is a movie about loving yourself for who you are despite your physical appearance, yet during the entire movie characters always make fun of Lord Farquaad for being short.

[just-shower-thoughts]

If someone told me their wedding anniversary was on September 11th, I would be sure they’ve been married for more than 16 years.

[kingpinnn]

Kids know.

[sale-aholic-deactivated20190809]

I want to rescue that precious child from Trump.

[shittyidea]

Take your family to a titty bar to celebrate Mammorial Day

[tiptons-blog]

[usingtimewisely]

I think about this joke a lot.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

This poor dude is waiting for his date for the prom unknowing he is being watched by the crew of a hit TV show

[hollyweeb-blvd]

The tides coming in, hurry up dude.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

Tide got him but he’s ok.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

He’s texting his girl but she’s not showing up. Is she standing him up?

[hollyweeb-blvd]

His best bud just showed up to help him.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

Tide is really coming in now, he’s on the phone. Things are getting frantic.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

Will she arrive in time? We’re gonna give him a round of applause if she says yes and arrives.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

OH NO!

[hollyweeb-blvd]

CREW IS ENCOURAGING HIM TO RE-DO HIS WORK. WE’RE SHOUTING “DO IT!”

[hollyweeb-blvd]

HE IS RE-MAKING THE MESSAGE! I REPEAT! HE IS REMAKING THE MESSAGE!

[hollyweeb-blvd]

WE HAVE RECIEVED WORD THAT THE GIRL IS ON A TREASURE HUNT IN THE CITY AND THIS IS THE FINAL LOCATION. HIS FRIEND IS STALLING FOR TIME.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

UPDATE: BEACHGOERS HAVE JOINED IN TO HELP THIS BOY REBUILD HIS MESSAGE TO THE GIRL! HIS FRIEND HAS JOINED IN AS WELL.

[hollyweeb-blvd]

IT’S ALMOST DONE! THEY MIGHT MAKE IT!

[hollyweeb-blvd]

THE MESSAGE IS COMPLETED! THE QUESTION IS NOW “WILL SHE SAY YES?”

[hollyweeb-blvd]

BRO OF THE YEAR JUST BROUGHT A GIRL. I THINK THIS MAY BE IT!

I THINK THIS IS IT!

[hollyweeb-blvd]

SHE’S APPROACHING!

YES! THE ANSWER IS YES!

OUR CREW IS CHEERING FOR THESE TWO.

[shittyidea]

T-shirts that say “Comey is my homey”

[shittyidea]

Dropping out of the Paris Agreement

[sinatraaloof]

[karadabvers-deactivated20170430]

someone: whats ur ringtone me, who has had their phone on vibrate since 2008: ???

[abandoned-blog-deactivated20111]

[bravelittlepixel]

tfw coming home from school ready to chill but being told you gotta do chores

[wang-fire]

can waterbenders bend oil can earthbenders bend glass can airbenders bend sound can firebenders bend mixtapes

[britneysbaldhead-deactivated201]

me in hell waiting for all my friends to die

[shittyidea]

Shit your pants at a job interview, then clean it up to show off your problem solving skills

[gnarly]

*snapchats and texts the same person at the same time*

[supasanti]

But it’s two completely different conversations

[thebestmoreorless-deactivated20]

SOMEBODY SHARED THIS WITH ME & OUCH IM LAUGHING SO HARD BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM HURT