A Life of Gratitude

One Life's Journey to a Life Worth Living

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Installing Love

Tech Support: Yes, ... how can I help you?

Customer: Well, after much consideration, I've decided to install Love. Can

You guide me through the process?

Tech Support: Yes. I can help you. Are you ready to proceed?

Customer: Well, I'm not very technical, but I think I'm ready. What do I do?

First?

Tech Support: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you located your

Heart?

Customer: Yes, but there are several other programs running now. Is it okay

to install Love while they are running?

Tech Support: What programs are running ?

Customer: Let's see, I have Past Hurt, Low Self-Esteem, Grudge and

Resentment running right now.

Tech Support: No problem, Love will gradually erase Past Hurt from your

current operating system. It may remain in your permanent

memory but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will eventually

override Low Self-Esteem with a module of its own called

High Self-Esteem. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge and

Resentment. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed. Can

you turn those off ?

Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

Tech Support: With pleasure. Go to your start menu and invoke Forgiveness.

Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge and

Resentment have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, done! Love has started installing itself. Is that normal?

Tech Support: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You

need to begin connecting to other Hearts in order to get the

upgrades.

Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. It says, "Error - Program

not run on external components ." What should I do?

Tech Support: Don't worry. It means that the Love program is set up to run

on Internal Hearts, but has not yet been run on your Heart.

In non-technical terms, it simply means you have to Love yourself before

you can Love others.

Customer: So, what should I do?

Tech Support: Pull down Self-Acceptance; then click on the following:

Forgive-Self; Realize Your Worth; and Acknowledge your Limitations.

Customer: Okay, done.

Tech Support: Now, copy them to the "My Heart" directory. The system will

overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching faulty

programming. Also, you need to delete Verbose Self-Criticism from all

directories and empty your Recycle Bin to make sure it is completely gone

and never comes back.

Customer: Got it. Hey! My heart is filling up with new files. Smile is

playing on my monitor and Peace and Contentment are copying

themselves all over My Heart. Is this normal?

Tech Support: Sometimes. For others it takes awhile, but eventually

everything gets it at the proper time. So Love is installed and running.

One more thing before we hang up. Love is Freeware. Be sure to give it and

its various modules to everyone you meet. They will in turn share it with

others and return some cool modules back to

you.

Customer: Thank you, God.

[igiveuponusernames-blog1]

Page 1

Good Morning Ladies: 

I decided I would take today's gratitude list to be grateful for some of the lessons I've learned that have improved my life. Since learning these lessons consumed a good portion of my life and a few nearly killed me, I figured it was time to say thank you to the universe for teaching me, God for guiding me, and myself for finally getting them. They are: 

Pick your battles. It is not important that she eat her green beans, it is important she showers occasionally 

Riding the ass of the guy in front of you will not make him go faster 

Do NOT say it's OK if it's not. Stewing is acid to the foundation of your relationship. If you’re hurt, say so. If you're OK with it, BE OK with it. 

No, he really can't read your mind 

Forgotten birthdays, anniversaries, and valentines days are no big deal. Him holding your hand when you’re sick and scared is. Let it go. 

Forgiveness is freedom. 

Gratitude is the key to a blessed life 

People only know what you put out. Don't get pissed if they don't like you. Work to change their minds or let it go. 

The "well why can't he" tact is a marriage killer 

No matter what someone does to you, it is up to you how you deal with it and move forward. YOU are responsible for your own actions AND reactions 

Your perspective is 98% responsible for determining if you have a good life or a bad one; weather your happy or sad. 

These are just a few of the lessons I've learned and I'm grateful for. I could list more but I have to get to work. 

Love you,

Me

 Lisa taught me unconditional love

Kelly taught me to pick my battles

June taught me to express pure joy

[harrypotterhousequotes]

HUFFLEPUFF: “I can have peace of mind only when I forgive rather than judge.” –Gerald Jampolsky

[booknrd]

[wolveswolves]

By L E

[igiveuponusernames-blog1]

A Life of Gratitude

Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues,

but the parent of all the others. ~ Cicero ~

Preface: 

In this my 205th revision, as a final attempt to remove all of the typos, misspellings and such, I thought it might be time for me to tell a bit more of how I found my way to this life of gratitude. 

In February 2007 I ceased to exist. More precisely, the woman I was ceased to exist. It was not a quick or painless death. It took months of hard work and determination to kill her but dead she is and dead she will stay. Quite honestly, I say good riddance. That woman was an alcoholic, foul mouthed, heavy smoking, vacant and nasty shell. She was an absent mother, a frigid wife and an all around negative person. She made her life a mess and chose to wallow in it, but hey, she's dead and the world is a better place for it. I have taken her place.

The transfer of consciousness began February 7th, 2007. It was a dark Thursday morning, not that that's at all important. That morning I was watching, of all things, Oprah. Oh dear, I can hear your audible groan from here but I beg you, hang in there with me. It gets better. That Thursday morning while watching Oprah, I got this bright Idea. "Let's try to be a more positive person" Simple right? Just stop whining, bitching and complaining all the time. That random thought bubble is what killed her. The old me began to die that very moment and I began to grow. What saved me? How did I give up the booze and 3 packs a day? How did I save a failing marriage and become if not a great mother, at least a present one? Well, that's what my book is about.

That very Thursday morning I decided to enlist two people nearly as dark and moody as myself, my mother and my daughter. I decided it would be a good idea for us to email each other daily with little bits of encouragement, inspirational quotes, daily challenges and positive affirmations. One of the very first quotes I came across is what became my life raft.

When realty slapped me in the face and tried to drown me in my regrets, this quote not only saved me, but allowed me to move forward one small step at a time. The quote is:

Cicero: Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues, but the parent of all the others.

Less than 2 months later, I was well on my journey of discovery and had left both my mother and my daughter behind. Not in life, but in change. We simply stopped emailing each other. I became frustrated with their lack of participation and I became a thorn in their sides. At that time, I was simply not strong enough to carry us all. A year later, in April of 2008 my daughter reached out and requested we start again. She was in a dark time of her life and needed something positive to cling to. Gratitude became her life ring and we once again began to email daily. This time we chose to keep it simple. We emailed each other daily a list of things we were grateful for. On days we struggled the list was short. Sometimes consisting of nothing more than "copious amounts of Dunkin Doughnuts Coffee" and on days we soared, they were long and rambling. As I changed I discovered a new passion. Photography became central in my journey and I began to want to share how gratitude was changing my life with my friends so I began to post my emails on Facebook along with one of my photographs I felt suited my list for that day. These postings were used to create the book.

My hope is that you to may find the healing, restoring and transforming power of gratitude.

Sincerely,

 MeAgain

Dedicated to my Angels: The Queen, the Dorkfish and the Pixie. Without you I would cease to be me. And to Ms. Amy. My favorite stalker and biggest cheerleader. 

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Returning to Gratitude

TA DA! THE FIRST POST OF ANOTHER NEW BLOG!

I am bipolar. This is nothing new, or even mildly interesting it is simply one of the way in which I identify myself. It’s an odd thing to announce on the first post of a brand new blog. *shrugs* May as well get it out of the way. 

I’ve been legally medicated for 10 years now. When reading my story one should note that I am not in jail. I have not killed anyone. I am sane, employed, and staying married to my husband. I have not torched his corvette, I have not shredded his clothes, I have not even been in a padded room. I’m on some good drugs dude. I’ve even managed to set a good example to my grown children that no matter what anyone or many ones might say, your life is in your hands. That you can’t do anything about someone else’s actions but are responsible for your own reactions. 

At the moment my life is in crisis. Not the “I’m gonna die” kind, more like “this hurts like hell, how am I going to get through it?” 

In the last 8 months I discovered my husband was cheating on me. That he spent every penny of the savings we took 30 years to build on hookers and blackmail. That the last one he slept with destroyed us. That he did things on his work computer (like hooking up with said hookers) that got him fired thus causing us to loose our medical insurance, our regular income and our general sense of everything. Then he got arrested, his face was on the news before I could tell my kids what was going on. He couldn’t work in our town and had to go nearly 2,000 miles away to get work. The last punch in the face we took was legal. He could spend 365 days in Jail or he could go to trial with all of the evidence that could prove he was just stupid, not evil suppressed by the judge. Facing 66 months in prison, we chose to take the plea. 

*deep breath*

I left out the part about his mother dying and me finding a lump in my breast because that would just sound melodramatic. 

I find myself staring down a long dirt road, waiting for my husband of 29 years to go to jail one month prior to our 30th anniversary where he vowed to keep only unto me. 

What the hell am I going to do? 365 days without the person that helped me carry the load of life. He has not even gone yet and the weight of it all is nearly crushing. 2 weeks till he’s gone. Just 2 weeks to prepare for a life completely different from what was expected. I feel like a house with all of the windows smashed out. 

*puts on her big girl panties*

I am going back to the force that changed my life once before. I wrote a book a lifetime ago titled “A Life of Gratitude” and I’m rereading it and reminding myself that there is no force on earth greater than gratitude. The book’s not good. It sold 27 copies. 4 to me, 5 to my cousin’s rehab center, and the rest to my mother, but it did what it was intended to do, it documented a journey from a life of anger and bitterness to a life worth living. Even now, through all of this, I can say I have a good life and mean it. That has to count for something.  

I’m posting my book just to make myself feel better. Come along with me if you like but really, this is my journey to healing, recovery of a shattered marriage and remembering where I’ve been and how I’m going to get where I’m determined to go.