“ ah, it’s actually kinda cute ” star remarks as she walks along the path, grinning goofily at the small baby girl being carried by her mother across the street. she waves and makes silly faces, giggling as she makes the baby smile. the girl had been so distracted, she isn’t able to stop herself before colliding with another person. “ i’m so sorry ! ” she speaks as she stumbles backwards.
he was making his way back to the dorms after a full morning of classes, intending to spend the rest of the afternoon watching anime before he had to head for his evening practice with some of the boys. he momentarily stopped in the middle of the sidewalk to check his phone for the time, before he felt another body collide with his. he holds onto the other's arms to stop them from stumbling back, immediately letting go as soon as she was standing straight. he recognized her— she was just a year older than him and they went to the same high school, it also happened to be the lead rapper of lady. ❝ o-oh, sunbae, i'm sorry— i didn't see you coming. are you okay? ❞
“i’m… you know. i’ve never been the best at giving advice that was always your department but… for you, i’ll try.” she finally managed, hating how stupid she sounded as she struggled to get her words out. “if you’re tired, if it’s showing, do something to distract yourself. even just for a little while. doing things you like can help you focus on the things you need to when you go back into it, you know ? ” she knew her words probably didn’t help him at all and she hated it but in her sleep deprived state, it was the b e s t she could do. “we should go and do something. being stuffed inside of a library when we’re both sleepy is doing us no favours. let’s go do something. what do you say ? ”
he couldn’t stop the laughter from escaping him, but he quickly quieted down as multiple pairs of eyes had glared at him for disturbing their peace. he gave her a bright smile before covering it up with the back of his hand out of embarrassment. ❝ yes, italian cuisine. ever since i went to italy, i’ve been dying to learn how to make some of their dishes. ❞ that detail wasn’t a lie— he was technically the chef of the male trainee dorms, and he’s always looking for something new to make just to extend his knowledge; he’s just lucky that after coming home from practice, there’s several other exhausted, hungry trainees that are willing to eat anything that he’s willing to make. ❝ have i never cooked for you before? i swear i have. but yes, of course i’ll call you. i don’t think i’ve made a traditional italian dish in my life— i just hope i don’t poison you on my first attempt. ❞ he frowned at the thought of even hurting anyone in the slightest, much less someone as important to him as yeun sunmi. his cheeks heated at the compliment, a small chuckle leaving his lips at the thought. ❝ ah, thank you. i don’t know if i could move to italy, i’d miss my family a lot. ❞ he paused, before giving her another smile. ❝ but, if you’re coming with me... i guess it won’t be so bad. ❞
if she thought that he wouldn’t know his own best friend, she happened to be wrong. they may be in different companies and may be seeing less of each other nowadays, but he knew her habits like the back of his hand after nearly eight years of friendship. maybe he’ll ask his brother to check up on her once in awhile when he can, since he couldn’t do it himself. he lifted his head to peek at the group of girls at her words, confused as to why they’d be looking at him when there was an idol just a few meters from them. ❝ why would i even be a topic of interest for them? i’m not famous. ❞ at least, not as famous as he was before becoming a trainee. still, he doubted anyone would recognize him from when he was a kid— he sometimes had trouble recognizing himself in older movies. he immediately put his head back down, closing his eyes momentarily with a small smile. ❝ just saying ‘i miss you’ is overrated, don’t you think? there’s probably a million different things you could say or do that could replace the overused phrases. ❞ he shrugged, a smile still playing on his lips. ❝ but yes, i did miss you, sunmi. i missed you a lot. ❞
there was a million things minho could talk about when he was with sunmi, being able to talk to her with ease as opposed to many others in his life, but he still struggled with voicing anything about the weight that constantly sat on his shoulders. he could only offer a small nod as she admitted what she was going to attempt to do— he’s just unsure of how he’ll take it. he was so used to doing things the conventional way ( aka pretending the problem wasn’t sitting in the back of his mind, always haunting his thoughts and dreams ) that he had forgotten that other options existed. ❝ i just... i feel like i’ve been taking a lot of day offs already. i don’t think i can distract myself for much longer. ❞ but he knew she was right, and that was to be expected of her between the two of them. ❝ do something? you mean right now? ❞ he finally sat up, leaning his elbows onto the table with an expression of obvious confusion. ❝ what do you want to do? i'm just worried that you might be in trouble if you’re seen with me. ❞
it’s one of the rare occasions that the whole of the ahn family is together, and seola hates it. she hates it so much so, that she had shut herself inside her room for the entire day, not even leaving when she heard the yeong family enter. the girl is laying on the bed, on her stomach, flicking through tv shows when the other asks to enter. she takes a few seconds after he enters to stomp down the annoyance of him barging in. count to 10. take some deep breaths. “why are you here?” a little more sharp than she intended for it to sound, but she already knew the reason anyway. “have you been forced up here while the grown-ups talk?” the same routine had gone on since seola was extremely young, so minho’s appearance at her door didn’t surprise her.
“where is the better yeong brother? why didn’t you bring minwoo?” she says, growing fondness in her tone for the younger brother, though her expression stays neutral. she glanced over his way once again, suppressing the urge to laugh as he stood in the middle of the room. her attention was focused back on her television as she randomly picked a show to watch, to distract from how awkward it felt in here. a pout lands itself on her face at his next words, and she huffs. “well if dad said i can to then i suppose i will.” her gaze flicking over to her closet. “it’s an excuse to go shopping, so why not?”
a smug grin crosses her features as minho seats himself on the floor. “a wise choice.” she nods down to his position on the floor. “what are you gonna do? drag me there?” she glares at him, before picking up and throwing one of the many, many pillows at his face. “if you sit on the floor, you should sit on that or you’ll hurt your back”, a cross between a smile and a grimace on her face.
he almost couldn't surpress his sigh at her question. he didn't like it any more than she did, but he didn't exactly hate the predicament they were in, either. they used to he really close when they were younger, she was like the younger sister he never had, but somewhere along the years things had changed, and they've grown to develop this mild version of a love-hate relationship— he was the loving side, and she was the hateful. he didn't necessarily mind, she was still one of his closest friends regardless of how far apart they seem to be nowadays. ❝ you know them, they always have something they don't want us to hear. ❞ he almost grew anxious that his parents were specifically speaking of him, but he decided to give himself the benefit of the doubt the majority of the time.
the male tilted his head, a pout on his lips as he relayed the news to her. ❝ he’s sickー minwoo caught a cold from one of his classmates at school, so my parents made him stay home. ❞ he paused, looking around the room he had grown accustomed to over the years of visiting. ❝ hyung was watching him tonight, which is why he isn’t here either. ❞ he could only wish his brothers were hereー minwoo could distract her meanwhile he could hold a conversation with mincheol. he was always so used to bickering and bantering with seola, but he knew his boundaries; he couldn’t take it to their usual level in the comforts of her own home. ❝ don’t you have enough outfits? you’ll probably only wear that outfit once anyway. ❞
he sticks his tongue out at her comment, opting to say nothing that would get him kicked out of her room. minho didn’t really get the details, all he knew was that they were all going to the movie premiere whether the lot liked it or not. ❝ well, i don’t know. it was your dad who made the decision. if i had the choice, i wouldn’t even go. ❞ because he, too, was being forced into attending. not that he didn’t want to support his father during his next success story, he just didn’t feel up to it. he sent a playful glare in her direction once the pillow she had thrown was being hugged by him ( rather than being his seat like she had suggested ), shrugging nonchalantly. ❝ maybe if i hurt my back i can skip practice tomorrow. but more importantlyー
... seola, is that your way of saying you care for me? ❞
☆ﾟ. * · 。ﾟ @ikminho / “yes, mom—” he sighed into the cellphone, turning over onto his other side as he lounged on the flimsy couch that sat flat in the center of the cramped dorm. his whole body ( barely ) fit on the lackluster piece of furniture, with his knee’s ability to bend and fold being the only reason why he hadn’t fallen off the cushions and onto his ass. “yes, i’ve been eating. no, i haven’t met any girls. no, i don’t know how kyuri is doing—why don’t you just call her yourself, mom? she’s a trainee, not a prisoner.” though a slight bit of annoyance laced his tone, the major underlay of his voice held the constant adoration and appreciation he had for his mother. ( but, truth be told, he did wish these daily calls would let up once in a while, especially since the woman practically lived down the block from the galaxy building. ) “yes, i’ve been good—what do you mean you don’t believe me? c’mon, mom—have a little faith—” to which his sentence was cut short by the sound of the keys turning in a lock and of the front door creaking open. his eyes glanced up, taking note of the familiar male strolling in before a figurative lightbulb went off above his head. “hey mom! why don’t you talk to minho?—you love minho, remember?—” cue the taller male basically shoving his cellphone in his fellow trainee’s face, not forgetting the pleading gestures and the several mouthings of the word ‘ please ‘ over and over again.
as minho eavesdropped from outside the door to the boys' dorm, he pondered if he should actually go inside. from what he was hearing, kyungjae was busy ( being loud ) as he spoke to his mother over the phone, so he wasn't sure if he could manage to sneak in and catch a little nap before his practice later in the afternoon. unfortunately, it wasn't as if he could sleep outside, so there was really only one thing he could do. as he unlocked the door, he had hoped that he could just go inside and sneak by to his room, but clearly kyungjae had other plans in mind— that had minho shaking his head, mouthing 'no' over and over again. still, minho had taken his phone, plastering a smile ( even if she couldn't see it ) as sent a glare to the other male. ❝ hi mom !! uh, yes yes, i'm doing well. i just came back from class actually. how are— ❞ he was cut off almost immediately, rambles of her worries for him and her children entering one ear and leaving the other. they were all responsible, weren't they? ❝ no— they're doing well. ❞ then mischievousness flashed in his eyes, turning away from the taller male as if to tell a secret. ❝ you know, kyungjae really misses his family. he wants to have dinner with everyone soon. ❞ he was expecting her to ask him to relay the message to her son that they'd meet up for dinner tonight, but he immediately regretted it as soon as she began asking him to attend too. ( honestly, minho can't say no. curse his inability to. ) ❝ i-i ... we'd love to join for dinner— tonight? uh— w-we'll be there... yes, see you soon mom. o-okay— bye, yes we'll actually go... bye mom... ❞ as soon as he hung up, he turned to the other, a sheepish smile on his face. ❝ looks like practice might need to be cancelled... ❞
he hated being alone in his family's large home. sure, it was beautiful and had been home to him for many years, but he wasn't used to being alone it in. of course, there was always one or two people running around tending to it after being hired by his parents, but they never necessarily bothered with him unless they were specifically requested to. he had come home on one of the days he was allowed a day off from schedule, but unfortunately he was the only one home at the moment. he had forgotten that his family, too, had schedules that they must attend to. he didn't mind though, he completely understood. it was the reason he had just decided to take a long needed nap on the couch until one of them came home.
so when the sound of the front door opening had woken him up a few hours before his parents were to come home, he couldn't help but be rather alarmed.
the trainee quickly stood up from his position on the couch, grabbing the nearest thing to him ( a pillow ) before quietly advancing towards the entryway. minho could just call the cops, but he’s not even certain if the intruder was actually a friendly face. ( as minho liked to put it, he was really just testing out the ‘white-girl-in-a-horror-movie’ syndrome. but one, minho was not a white girl, and two— this wasn’t a horror movie. ) as he approached the area, he didn’t realize the person coming in was actually his older brother. consequentially, due to his utter lack of sense in the moment, he threw the pillow at his brother’s face before running towards the other side of the room. when he finally realized who he’d attacked, he couldn’t help but fall into a fit of laughter.
❝ oh— oh my god, hyung, i’m sorry !! i thought— i really believed you were— i didn’t know— i mean, welcome home? ❞
i know that in the end i’ll probably just be a page, or maybe even a chapter in your book. even if that’s the case, i hope i’ll be one you go back and read often. and as you run your fingers over our words, i hope you smile.
“minho, come and eat these sweet potatoes with me before they get cold. i just bought them from an auntie outside.” the clattering from his shoes can be heard as the rapper kicked them off clumsily, quick to escape the cold from the hallway and into the dorm’s cozy sitting room. placing the piping hot plastic bag down on the the wooden coffee table, joon was already in the midst up peeling one of the potatoes, the heated skin burning his finger tips. “minho!” the older called again, taking a huge bite of the potato in his possession only to regret it immediately soon after.
❝ i'm here, i'm here... ❞ slowly stalking into the living space, his hair was disheveled and his eyes were still closed, clearly still half asleep from the nap he had never meant to take. he had meant to head out early to catch up on practices he's missed due to classes, but he figured one more minute couldn't hurt, yet when he had fell back onto haneuls bed ( far too tired to climb up to his bunk ) he stayed in his slumber longer than he needed to. then a few hours later, he had been awakened by joon's calling and the aroma of sweet potatoes filling their dorm, and although he wanted sleep, he was thankful now that he was woken up. ❝ be careful, hyung, wouldn't want you burning your tongue, or choking on a potato !! i don't have my phone on me, so i wouldn't be able to record it—- be more considerate. ❞
he almost feels offended, but he knows that minho knows him well and won’t take any of the defenses he could throw out. he knows very well that the younger ( it’s almost a complete year, he can call him younger ) will call him out for anything he could say. he was right, he’d not have let the other go back to sleep. he wasn’t past climbing up to minho’s bed if he didn’t come down. ❛ touché, i probably wouldn’t have let you stay away from me. plus, i know you like sleeping with me, you don’t have to play yourself like that. ❜
there is an attempt to shrug despite being against minho and laying down. the shrug turns out to be more of a failure, and instead he hikes his leg over minho’s curled up form. ❛ you’re daddy, that’s why. why do i need more reason other than you’re attractive? you’re so demanding. talk about high maintenance. ❜
with the next question, he quickly moves to land on top of minho, grabbing toward his phone on the table, pulling up the video he was watching. ❛ i was watching this. it’s about murderous children. this one fourteen year old stabbed his best friend, fourteen. and this twelve year old shot his dad with his friend. thats crazy, right? do you wanna watch more with me? ❜
he fights the urge to literally punch his best friend, but he realizes he's far too tired to even try lifting a hand at him. he could only manage a short-lived scowl, though that couldn't be taken seriously when he was snuggling into the other's side so effortlessly. ❝ i'm blocking you again when i'm not half asleep. ❞ minho can't help but sigh, unsure if he should make an attempt to rebuttal—- he wasn't completely wrong, but not completely correct either. ❝ i like sleeping beside you, and that's only on good nights. ❞
❝ shut up. ❞ with a roll of his eyes, he attempted to push himself away from the other, but with a leg wrapped around his waist, there isn't much room for movement—- as if there was any to begin with. ❝ high maintenance? demanding? how could you accuse me of being such a thing? ❞ the trainee feigned offense, a hand clutching his chest dramatically at the other's words. ❝ uh, i appreciate you calling me attractive, i guess... but call someone else daddy. ❞
the male eyes the other incredulously for a moment, before once again letting out another sigh, this one of disappointment. he hated knowing haneul was staying up so late, only for him to train hard once they were in the trainee building. focusing too much on it, though, is something he wouldn't do—- it was none of his business unless haneul wanted to tell. ❝ you should sleep, you'll need energy for practice later and slacking is something you don't want to do, right? can you really not fall asleep? i'll only watch it if you can't... ❞
minho could only stare at the younger boy wide-eyed once he was caught red-handed, a half eaten cookie in his mouth as he cradled four more in his hands. he was alone in the dorms, or so he had thought, and saw a bunch of freshly-made cookies on a plate in the middle of the kitchen—- what was he supposed to do? hunger had gotten the best of him, and without any regards to whom these cookies were for, he took one just to 'test it out' or so he claimed, but eventually he wound up taking nearly half of the contents.
now, seeing seohyung's reaction to what he was doing, minho was quickly regretting such careless actions.
he slowly backed away, back to the plate holding the rest of the cookies he left behind, a sheepish grin on his face as he carefully placed the cookies he held back on top of the others he left behind. guiltily finishing the one in his mouth, he cleared his throat, almost unsure of what to say. ❝ um... i'm really sorry? they just smelled so good... ❞ he almost picked up another one, but stopped himself before sighing again. ❝ were these for byeol? haneul mentioned you might do something to impress her... i could... help make more if you want? ❞
she felt bad sometimes, a majority of the time, really, for never being around for him as much as she used to be. busy schedules had taken her away from her friends, had taken away the free time that she had once had. she knew he understood, but that didn’t stop the guilt. watching him, her gaze would soften for a moment before she groaned, swatting his hand away from her with a silent laugh. “never said you weren’t a good kid, i just know how you are. and don’t poke me.” she whined playfully, childishly before she smiled gently. “i get plenty of rest, don’t you worry about me.” the main vocalist would reply, a reassuring tone to her airy voice as one hand absentmindedly reached out to play with the sleeve of his sweater, eyes closing despite her words as she listened to him. it was then that she realized that, in a few days, sweetheart’s two year anniversary would be upon them and she sighed almost silently. it truly didn’t feel like she’d been at least for almost a year. “really ? should i head over and talk to them ? ” she asked softly, another laugh spilling past her red lips as she momentarily opened her eyes to look over at the aforementioned girls before she hummed silently and closed her eyes once more. “catch a nap… i won’t tell on you. i’ll even build up a barrier around you with my books so no one knows you’re sleeping.” she replied, her tone partially joking and half serious as she continued to toy with his sleeve. “it’s all gonna be worth it… you know that, right ? i believe in you. and so do so many other people… you should believe in yourself as well.”
he wouldn't voice it out loud, but sometimes he wished that she did have a little less time on her hands. as understanding as he is, and how proud of her he is for getting the chance to do all of this like she had always wanted to, he wanted more time with her. she was one of his best friends, and it was inevitable that he'd miss her when she was busy, right? he couldn't help but chuckle at her words, poking her just one more time before dropping his hand onto the table. ❝ yah, who says i haven't changed? i'm came here to study, just like everyone else. ❞ he glanced down at his book before waving it in her face, confident although the both of them knew that he was lying through his teeth. ❝ see? i'm clearly studying... italian cuisines... i changed my major, obviously. ❞ despite the fact that he was being rather unbelievable at the moment, he couldn't help but squint her, unsure if he could believe her. if his coaches already worked him hard as a trainee, he imagined that hers would double the amount of pressure since she's an idol now. not to mention the fact that he's heard of how hard crystal media's training system was through the grapevine—- but being who he is, he wasn't going to press her on it.
❝ ah, alright then. health comes first, remember that. fans are always going to be worrying ahout your health, so i'm going to do what i always do and give you the first warning. ❞ minho wasn't one to fool around; yes, practicing hard was good, but going too hard was something he considered stupid. he often scolded other trainees about it when he caught them, resembling much of a nagging mother without meaning to. he glanced over at the group of girls again, who were whispering amongst themselves in the obvious way girls do as if sharing secrets. he could only scrunch his nose up, before laying his head down on his arm to hide his face. ❝ if you want, i think they'd like that to be honest. maybe it'd stop them from looking here. ❞ his eyes travelled to her closed ones, a small smile on his face as he really got a good look at her for the first time in awhile. they've been friends for years, and they see each other as often as they could, but looking at her now, he can't help but need to memorize all her features before she's gone and busy with schedules again. ❝ i'll be fine; i want to talk to you more. ❞ he couldn't help the sigh that passed his lips at her words, knowing she was right, though slightly unable to believe her. this was a touchy subject. ❝ i know, and i'm always thankful. i'm just... i've been tired lately and it's beginning to show. ❞
triggers » none.
date & location » 170115 @ the trainee building.
word count » 687 words.
featuring » yeong minho.
summary » minho is tired. of everything.
author’s note » ??? why did i have time for this.
anyone who knows yeong minho knows that overworking is not something he's very keen on. he constantly sees trainees alike take the phrase 'go hard or go home' too literally, and it's not something he has ever considered. blindly participating in excessively practicing in order to reach some unrealistic goal of flawlessness was stupid and irresponsible, and minho was against such an act since it ruined one's health the more they continued with a routine like it. he knows the results of working and working non-stop, and he knows how harmful it could be for him if he pushed further without means of taking a break.
he knew better than to do something as reckless as that.
yet he couldn't help but do cave and try it out.
after returning from his classes of the day, he had been working on a routine for the next monthly evaluation. he may not be the best dancer in comparison to other trainees who got into galaxy because of their dancing abilities, but he's worked hard to refine his own skills since he first became a trainee. ( he didn't want to admit it out loud, but he was better at it than he'd like to let on; his nearly nine years of training weren't exactly for nothing. ) yet lately, he'd been feeling as if he was slacking lately. it wasn't the usual missteps or simply getting the wrong moves at the wrong time, it was more that his concentration had been elsewhere, the energy was severely lacking and the life in his movements were gone.
over time, it began to look as if the passion he once had had been fading quicker than he could notice.
and even when he did, he wasn't sure of how to fix this.
he thought maybe if he practiced a little harder, pushed himself to that edge as everyone else seemed to do, he'd find that spark. maybe if he worked twice as hard to meet that unrealistic goal of perfection that simply didn't exist would help show his superiors his potential. maybe if he just did something— literally anything —to make him stand out in the sea of current trainees, perhaps he'd be given that second chance to debut. unfortunately, the entertainment industry didn't work like that and minho knew better to believe that wish would come true. he knew why he wasn't going to debut—- he knew why moon wonjae wouldn't debut him this year in spite of his efforts.
he knew.
he understood.
but that is not what minho wanted despite the reasons why.
he felt as if his efforts have gone to waste. none of this practicing was worth anything; it wasn't going to change anything any time soon. eight years is a long time, and he could've spent those years starring in films and dramas, but he's worked hard towards a different dream and now it just seems so far away. so he continues to move along with the music, tiring his muscles out with every step—- even if he wanted to stop, he couldn't. he's grown comfortable with the ache in his limbs after three hours, and eventually his focus shifted away from the increasing pain in them.
this wasn't worth it.
so he stopped. as the music kept playing in the background, he could only sigh at his appearance in the mirror. he was sweating, his chest was heaving and his hair was disheveled from the amount of times he had ran his hands through it. a smile was vacant on his face, and he wasn't happy with the results he was producing. he didn't remember dancing being this stressful—- where had the fun gone? the more he stared at himself, he wondered if things would change. since the accident, any sense of motivation to continue training was fading away. he was always told that the training process would be difficult, and that it would be easier to stay as an actor since he already had a platform.
