I fear I was caught up with real life shenanigans (im starting uni this september thank GOD) (accounting & finance hates to see me coming)
BUT IM ALMOST DONE WITH A LIL SOMETHIN SOMETHIN bear with me y’all 🙏
ALSO tysm for all the love for Give & Take!!! I’ve seen the reposts and everything in my inbox and it got me giggling and kicking my feet y’all. There could be a third part… possibly….
Look, i love joel miller, but some demon in me is whispering in my ear to finish that one Rapunzel AU Mando x reader series thing I started a gazillion years ago (three months) that’s been rotting in my docs for a lifetime (three months).
Summary: Apparently, your IUD failed when your then ex-husband fucked you against your bathroom sink. Luckily for you, when you tell him the news, he fucks you again to make sure it sticks.
W.C: ~6.6k
TL;DR: check for your iud strings, y’all.
Warnings: ex-ex!joel x ex-ex!reader (y'all are fine now), sarah cameo, domestic life, sappy shit, joel is a tits man, breeding kink obvs, softdom!joel, fingering, unprotected p-in-v sex. reader gets called ‘mama’ while they’re doing it. (no outbreak!)
Note: second part of beck and call to appease the horde !! happy late father’s day to this guy
Part One | Part Two
You didn’t intend on falling asleep beside your ex-husband when you invited him over to fix your broken sink.
And you definitely didn’t intend on waking up in his arms, either.
Yet, there you were, tangled together in the worn mattress of your queen-sized bed. His right arm was folded below his head. His left was slung over your waist, holding you close to him as your head rested on his firm chest.
His heartbeat thudded softly beneath your ear. Steady. Familiar. Like a wordless promise to you that he was there. That last night, whatever it was, meant something.
Growl.
You froze.
Even more insistent, groooowl.
Apparently, there were three people in your bed: you, Joel, and your appetite.
As carefully as you could, you freed yourself from Joel’s embrace. He frowned, grunted petulantly in protest, and muttered your name in his sleep, before turning on his side.
And then, you pulled on a ratty old shirt and a pair of sleep shorts before quietly making your way downstairs, careful to avoid the second-to-the-last step of the staircase that always creaked.
The kitchen was still bathed in the golden glow of the early morning, light filtering in through the blinds in soft stripes. You padded across the cold floor and got to work.
Coffee, first. Then, as the machine did its job, eggs.
Eggs for two, just like before.
You stared down at the sizzling pan as if you were waiting for it to answer the question you were too scared to ask.
What now?
Because last night, Joel told you he still loved you.
Because you had kissed him, and he kissed you back, and he made love to you in your bathroom, of all places.
Because, instead of kicking him out, you pulled him to your bed and slept in his arms.
Because this morning, you wanted everything back. You wanted him back.
You rubbed your hand down your face and gave the eggs a stir. And then you turned toward the staircase at the muffled sound of soft, sleepy footsteps.
Speak of the devil.
Joel appeared by the doorway, hair dishevelled from sleep, gloriously shirtless, eyes half-lidded and tender.
“You makin’ us breakfast?” He said, voice low and slightly raspy.
“No, all this is just for me. But I’m sure the McDonald’s a few blocks down is open if you’re hungry.” You deadpanned, smiling to yourself and returning your attention to the eggs.
“Ha-ha.” Joel hummed sleepily and ventured nearer.
The two of you fell into what had been your daily routine. Joel fished out two mugs from the cabinet above the dishwasher and finished the coffee (milk and sugar for yours, black for him), right as you scraped the eggs off the pan onto two plates.
And, there you were, sitting across the kitchen table from the man you thought you’d lost forever.
“So.” You poked at your eggs with your fork.
“So,” Joel echoed, glancing up at you as he brought his mug to his lips.
“Are we gonna … talk about it?”
Joel blinked, then set his mug down. “What, last night?”
“Yeah. Last night.” You pushed around a clump of your breakfast.
“What about it?” His brows furrowed.
“Did you mean it?”
Your mind flashed with his sweet nothings. His confessions of longing and love and all else.
Joel’s gaze softened. “Every word.”
“Okay.” Your heart felt a little lighter. “Well, then, I’d like for us to try again.”
Smiling, he replied, “I’d like that, very much, baby.”
“Okay,” You said again, smiling right back at him.
“Okay.” He repeated, reaching across the table for your hand, softly lacing your fingers together.
And at that moment, you wanted to thank the stars above and the ineffable mercy of the universe for giving you a second chance.
For letting you find your way back to him, and him to you.
You shook your head, laughing. “My lawyer’s gonna have a field day.”
“You think you’ll get a refund?” He raised an eyebrow, lips pulling into a grin.
“Nope.” You clicked your tongue. “Maybe I’ll get my next divorce half-off, though.”
Joel chuckled and looked at you with this quiet, reverent warmth floating in the richness of his dark brown eyes that said he was falling deeper in love with you all over again.
Because he was. And, god help him, he didn’t remember how not to be.
Scooping the last of his eggs off his plate, he then pushed his chair back and stood.
“I’m gonna take a shower.” He walked by you to press a kiss to the crown of your head. “And then… well, we can sort the rest of this out.”
“Okay.” You smiled.
He then shot you a quick wink, and you watched as he disappeared up the stairs, basking in the afterglow of his lips still tingling on your scalp.
And the house went quiet, save for the occasional creak of the pipes and faint sound of running water from the upstairs ensuite.
You stared down into your coffee.
It was still slightly hard to process the dramatic turn of events hurled very suddenly toward you at full force. Just last week, you were negotiating which major holidays you’d get to spend with Sarah (no, Joel could not get Christmas in exchange for St Patrick’s Day—when in your life have you all celebrated St Patrick’s Day?), and now you were very eagerly ‘trying again’.
Not that you were complaining.
You’d try again a hundred more times if that were what it took to be with him again.
Smiling like an idiot, you rose from your chair and collected your plate in your hands, reaching over to stack it on top of Joel’s.
And, at that exact moment, the front door swung open, and a voice called:
“Mom? I’m home!”
You froze in place.
A few seconds later, your twelve-year-old daughter strolled into the kitchen.
“Oh, hey, mom.” She passed you a weary smile, setting down her duffel bag on the table.
“Sarah! You’re home early.” You breathed, voice an octave higher and excessively bright. “I thought your grandparents were still keeping you hostage at the lake house.”
“Yeah, well, Papa threw his back out trying to reel in a muskie.” She rolled her eyes, then walked over to the fridge to pull out a Capri-Sun. “Grandma had to drive us home so he could get checked out quickly. Nagged him the whole way back ‘cause her license expired back when I was still teething, apparently.”
You forced an overly responsive laugh.
It sounded less like a laugh and more like a startled cough that got lost halfway through a choke.
Sarah arched a brow, stabbing into the juice pack. “What’s up with you?”
“Nothing, bug.” You shook your head, glancing at the staircase.
“Okay.” Sarah dragged out the syllables, eyeing you over suspiciously. “How was your date yesterday?”
You choked. “Fine.”
And that was when Sarah’s eyes landed on the two plates you were holding tightly to your chest. Then they moved over to the two mugs sitting opposite each other on the table. And then, over to the pan on the stove littered with fresh egg residue.
“Right.” She made a face, then trudged over to sling her duffel bag over her shoulder. “I’ll see myself out until your guy leaves.”
“Sarah–”
“It’s fine.” She marched back toward the entryway. “I’ll go play outside, for once, or something. Aren’t you always saying that I should do that?”
Should you tell her?
You pressed your lips together, watching her shove her feet back in her worn Converse. “Sarah, would you stop for a second?”
Yeah, you should probably tell her that her dad’s ‘the guy’ upstairs.
Sarah bent down to tie her laces. “Mom, I don’t want to be traumatised by—”
And then her eyes widened.
She straightened up and shot you a look that was some amalgamation of disbelief and extreme confusion, nodding towards the welcome mat.
“Are those…dad’s boots?”
Shit.
To make matters worse, apparently, amidst all the kerfuffle, you had failed to notice that the shower had stopped running a good few minutes ago. And, right after Sarah’s astute observation, Joel descended the stairs. Hair slightly wet and wearing the flannel from yesterday evening.
“Good news, sweetheart, your sink’s still busted, but your shower’s—Sarah?”
The colour drained from his face.
“Dad?” She gaped back at him.
And suddenly, you somehow found yourself locked in what appeared to be a modern-day Western Standoff, except, instead of the threat of gunfire, there was the threat of someone saying something to make this situation even more unbearable.
For a good few seconds, there was absolute stillness.
No one moved. No one spoke. A bird chirped from somewhere outside, completely unaware of the domestic chaos unravelling within the house.
Ultimately, Joel decided to break the silence.
“Hey, kiddo.” He said casually, attempting a relaxed smile. “What are you … doin’ here?”
You held yourself back from facepalming into an early death.
“I could ask you the same thing.” She narrowed her gaze at him. “How long have you been here?”
Joel looked at you. You looked at Joel. Joel looked at Sarah. Sarah looked at you. Everyone looked at the boots.
“Not long.” You cleared your throat. “My sink was broken. Your dad was just helping me. With my sink.”
Smooth.
“So, you called him at eight in the morning and he took a shower in your bathroom?” Sarah said slowly.
“Well, you know your father. Always up at the crack of dawn.” You breathed, trying to sound breezy. Your voice was nothing of the sort.
“Just can’t help it.” Joel nodded.
Sarah blinked once.
Then twice.
And then looked between the two of you, wholly unconvinced, crossing her arms and somehow adopting the role of higher authority in this predicament.
“You two are being weird.” Was her final verdict.
You sighed and glanced at Joel before turning toward your daughter.
“Look,” You began, gently stepping toward her. “This is new. Like, very new. But … your dad and I are just figuring things out.”
“Not really a word, pumpkin.” Joel offered helpfully. “But we’re back together, yes.”
He caught your eye and gave you a small, reassuring smile.
Sarah’s expression softened.
“Jeez. I’m gone for three days, and this is what I miss?” She shook her head and waltzed back inside, past you and Joel, toward the stairs. Before she could set foot on the bottom step, she paused and faced the two of you. “I’m glad you two are whatever you are, but can we talk about this after I’ve taken a nap?”
Joel let out a huff of laughter. “Go and get some shut-eye, pumpkin.”
Sarah shrugged, already halfway up. “Cool. Just, like … warn me next time, maybe. I don’t wanna see things I can’t unsee.”
Your face heated. “Sarah!”
“What?” She called over her shoulder. “It would be extremely harmful to my development!”
And with that, she headed upstairs.
You turned toward Joel, wincing. “Think that could’ve gone better?”
Joel crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.
“Probably.” He sighed. “But, at least that’s over with. Telling our kid, I mean.”
“Right. Next up is telling family.” A shudder ran through your spine.
Joel smiled softly and beckoned you closer with a curl of his finger.
You acquiesced, moving to stand right in front of him. His hands immediately settled on your hips, softly caressing whatever exposed skin his thumbs found.
“We don’t have to tell everyone just yet, if you’re scared, baby.” He said, voice low and sweet and reassuring, his eyes holding yours like a lifeline.
“I want to.” You placed your hands on his chest, fingers fanning out and feeling the steady rise and fall beneath them. “Just … not how we told Sarah.”
“Agreed.” Joel leaned forward to kiss your forehead, closing his eyes as he did so.
You felt yourself smile.
“Next time I stay over, I’ll hide the evidence,” Joel mumbled.
“Stay over?” You pulled back to look up at him.
Joel looked back at you quizzically, a wrinkle making itself known in between his eyebrows.
“Yeah…?” He blinked. “We … well, we aren’t embracin’ some form of celibacy, are we?”
“No, I mean—I thought you were gonna move back in. Eventually.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah,” You inhaled, suddenly feeling your chest tighten. “Or, not. You know, it’s a very big thing, and I’d completely understand if you wanted to keep living in your apartment. I’m just offering it since, you know, we’re working things out and maybe it’d be easier to share a single … living space. Eventually. Not, like, tomorrow. Unless you want—”
Joel smiled. “Baby?”
You winced. “Uh-huh?”
“You’re ramblin’.”
“Am I?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Joel hummed fondly, bringing a hand up to trace his thumb along your lower lip. “‘Course I’ll move back in.” He then pulled you into him, wrapping an arm around your waist, and kissing you like it settled the matter.
Your lips moved slowly against his, savouring the tenderness of his touch and the warmth of his body against yours.
Before you knew it, he spun you around so that your back hit the wall, all but caging you in against it.
A breathless gasp slipped from your mouth, so he took the opportunity to slip his tongue past your lips and—
“Seriously? I leave you two alone for one second.”
You both tore yourselves apart like you were struck by lightning, finding your daughter shaking her head at you.
“Came down to get my bag.” Sarah coughed, holding up her duffel.
“Sorry, kiddo.” Joel ran a hand through his hair.
“Gross.” She muttered under her breath, retreating back to her room.
You held back a laugh, returning your attention to Joel and trailing a hand down his impossibly broad chest.
“You wanna … take this somewhere else, big guy?” You tilted your head, a certain glint of mischievousness dancing in your eyes.
Joel’s eyes darkened, and a smirk carved through his scruff. Right when he opened his mouth to respond to your suggestion, however, an exasperated grunt echoed down the stairs:
“I can still hear you!”
You both burst into laughter.
It had been a few weeks since you and Joel decided to get back together—a very good few weeks, at that.
Life seemed to fall into place perfectly.
Joel moved back in, you two were attending Sarah’s soccer matches at the same time, and nothing at all was going wrong.
Until it all went wrong.
“Dad,” You balanced the phone between your ear and your shoulder as you wiped down your bathroom mirror, already regretting your choice to heavy-clean your ensuite on your day off from work. “Aren’t you afraid you’ll pop out one of your hip replacements or something?
“It’s just fishing. Besides, why have a lakehouse if you can’t even use it this often?”
“The doctor said—”
A hearty chuckle sounded from the other line.
“Peanut, you sound just like your mother. The doctor can say all she wants, but nothing gives her the right to dictate my life!”
“No, no, just a fancy little medical degree.” You grumbled, rubbing at a particularly stubborn smudge in the glass.
“You only live once.” Was his fortified argument.
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes, opting to let out a long sigh instead.
Evidently, he heard it.
“I’m fine. Really.” Your dad insisted. “In fact, better than fine. Reeled in quite the catch yesterday.”
“Oh yeah?” You said distractedly, spritzing the mirror with more glass cleaner.
“Oh yeah.” Your dad parroted, a big, proud grin in his voice. “Caught myself a whopper yesterday—a big ol’ largemouth bass that fought me tooth and nail. Then there was that sneaky little crappie hiding under the dock. Darn slippery fella. Literally. Almost slipped right through my hands. Oh, and don’t get me started on the catfish. Little guy had the longest whiskers I’d seen, too.”
You tried to focus, but your stomach twisted with a sudden sharpness. You set the rag and glass cleaner bottle down.
“Dad, hold on—” You started, but he wasn’t done.
“Had to wrestle that sucker outta the mud, muddy as all get-out, slime glistening in the sun, gills flapping like a crazy bird. It was a damn enthusiastic fighter. I swear, Peanut, if I weren’t as strong as I am, I would’ve lost.”
Your vision blurred a little, and your hand flew up to your mouth.
“Dad, wait, hold on—”
Before you could say anything else, your stomach flipped violently, and you dashed to kneel in front of the toilet, dropping your phone as you felt yourself give way to what had been your breakfast.
The sound of your dad’s voice echoed faintly over the phone. “You alright, darlin’?”
Holding yourself up with an iron grip on the toilet seat, you let out a long breath.
“Yeah, just—can I call you back, Dad?” You managed, slowly reaching for your phone.
“‘Course. I'd better get back to the lake, anyway. Give Porn Stache and my little Sarah-Banana my love.”
“He has a name, Dad.” You smiled weakly.
“He’s gotta earn it back after the divorce.”
“We’re not divorced anymore.”
“You know what I mean.”
And, with the routine exchange of ‘I-love-you’s, you ended the call, squeezing your eyes shut and letting your head hang above the toilet bowl.
This wasn’t normal.
‘This’ being, spontaneously hurling your guts out without preamble or provocation. And people don’t just throw up for fun.
A tiny, traitorous voice elbowed its way to the front of your mind. Unless…
No.
No, you couldn’t be. There was no need to panic; you had an IUD.
Sitting yourself on the toilet seat, you very ungracefully spread your legs and felt your way up your walls.
No strings. No IUD.
Maybe there was a need to panic.
You sighed, angling your head up at the ceiling. There was only one way to test the very realistic hypothesis you didn’t dare say, let alone think, aloud.
So, you cleaned yourself up, grabbed your car keys, and headed to the nearest drug store.
When Joel came home a few hours later, you were already waiting for him at the kitchen table.
He stepped through the doorway, boots heavy against the hardwood, and froze mid-step upon seeing you there. Because you were stone-faced, worrying your lower lip with your upper teeth, and clasping your hands over the table like you always did when you had to get something off your chest.
Joel’s eyebrows knitted together. “Sweetheart? You okay?”
He tentatively neared you.
You didn’t answer. Not right away. You hadn’t exactly prepared a speech in all the hours you had before Joel ended work.
“Baby, you’re scarin’ me.” He whispered, taking another step.
And then, he knelt down in front of you, taking your hands in his and gently running his thumbs over your knuckles.
“Don’t get mad.” You bit the inside of your cheek.
“Now, why would I get mad?” A delicate kiss to your left wrist.
“Because…”
You took a breath. No sense in sugarcoating this.
“I’m pregnant.”
The words slipped out like they didn’t belong to you.
Understandably, Joel’s eyes widened to the size of saucers.
“You’re pregnant?” He repeated, slowly, voice barely surpassing that of a whisper.
You nodded and pulled away to reach to the side, pulling a little brown bag from the drugstore onto the table and tipping it over. Three sticks clattered out.
All positive.
“Before you say anything,” You hugged yourself, watching as Joel’s mind buffered. “Yes, it’s yours. Yes, I thought I had an IUD. Apparently, it fell out. No, I didn’t know before today.”
Joel was still oddly quiet.
Your heart violently pounded against your ribs like it was trying to break free.
“Say something.” You whispered. “Please.”
“I don’t quite know what to say.” Joel shook his head, his eyes meeting yours.
“Anything. Say anything.” You braced yourself for the worst.
“I mean, I’m thrilled—”
What?
“You’re thrilled?” You echoed, not entirely convinced.
“Yeah, fuck, sweetheart. I am. Thrilled, but awfully caught off-guard.” Joel ran a hand down his face.
A breathy laugh escaped from his mouth, and he leaned slightly back on his heels.
“I mean, one minute I’m patchin’ drywall in someone’s guest bathroom, and the next, you’re tellin’ me I’m gonna be a dad again.” His voice cracked a little on the last word, but the big smile growing on his face told you that there was no trace of fear or devastation at all in his voice.
You blinked.
“So… you’re okay with this?”
Joel’s smile widened.
“I love you, baby. ‘Case that weren’t clear enough.” He took your hands in his again, your fingers dwarfed in his big calloused palms. He squeezed your hands gently in a wordless reassurance. “And, I’ve already been fortunate enough to have one incredible kid with you. The thought of doin’ it again … well, that ain’t somethin’ I’d complain about in a million years.”
You were speechless for a moment, lost in the magnetic pull of his impossibly warm, sincere eyes.
God, you loved him.
“This was not how I thought this conversation would go.” You admitted.
“You really thought I’d run for the hills?” Joel chuckled, shoulders bobbing.
“Fifty-fifty.”
He grinned even wider, the wrinkles creasing the edges of his eyes disappearing.
Then, he opened his mouth to say something. And then, apparently, decided against it, pressing his lips together.
You tilted your head to the side. “What is it?”
Joel shook his head and ran a hand through his hair, hesitating again.
“Ah shit,” He eventually muttered. “I was hopin’ to make this a little more special.”
“Make what more special?” You arched a brow.
“Stay right there, sweetheart, don’t you move.”
Before you could ask another question, Joel turned on his heel and bolted out of the kitchen. Judging by the quick, dull thuds ascending the stairs, he had run off to the second floor.
You sat there, stunned.
A full minute passed. Then two. The faint sounds of drawers opening and shutting drifted down the stairs. Almost a ruckus enough to drown out a muffled string of quiet curses.
It didn’t take long for Joel to return after that.
And when he did, he held his hands behind his back and smiled brightly.
“Joel, what are you…?” You laughed.
But the breath from your lungs was stolen for you when he slowly knelt in front of you, revealing what he was looking for upstairs.
Small. Silver. Studded with a single shining diamond. Princess-cut, of course, you picked it out yourself.
“Is that…?” You whispered, covering your mouth with your hands.
“Yeah,” Joel nodded, eyes soft. “Yeah, it is.”
You shook your head slowly. “You were supposed to sell it.”
“Well, I didn’t.” He gave you a sheepish little look. “Y’know, for safekeepin’.”
You didn’t know what to say. Your eyes kept flicking between his face and the ring.
Your ring.
“Are you … proposing again?”
“Is it that obvious?” He raised his eyebrows, gasping slightly theatrically.
You lightly smacked his shoulder, rolling your eyes, but failed to disguise the wide beam forming on your face. “You don’t have to—”
“I know.” Joel interrupted softly. “I want to.”
He drew in a breath, steadying himself and glancing down at the ring in his hands.
“I was gonna wait a little while longer ‘til I did this again. Let things settle, maybe find the right moment. But, well, I feel like this is the right moment.”
And he looked up at you.
And, seeing the tenderness on his face, you already knew the answer to the question he hadn’t even asked yet.
“I love you. And I am dead-set on doin’ things right, this time around. I’ll take out the trash more, cook on weeknights, hell—I’ll even go to those damn parent-teacher meetings. Long as I get to be with you again. Because you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I ain’t lettin’ you go this time.”
You blinked fast, attempting to overcome the emotion swelling in your chest and threatening to leak out of your eyes.
“Meant what I said that night,” Joel murmured, bringing your knuckles against his lips, eyes still holding onto yours. “You’re it for me. You’re everything. Always will be.”
He exhaled, the tension in his shoulders softening as he held your gaze.
“So.” He cracked a shy little smile. “If it weren’t clear enough until now, I’d like to marry you, if you’ll have me. And I’ll spend every last breath I have lovin’ you like you deserve. And you deserve far more than I can give, but I’m willing to try my damndest, anyway.”
Joel raised the ring, the jewel catching the fluorescent lights of the overhead lighting and shimmering softly.
“So … will you marry me, sweetheart?” He asked, voice low and vulnerable and hopeful. And then, he added through a light laugh, “...again?”
His eyes held yours as if the world had narrowed down to just this moment. An entirely fitting simile, because the truth of the matter was that you were his world. And such a fact was written plainly in every line of his face, in how he wore every piece of his heart in his eyes.
You didn’t give him an answer.
Instead, you leaned forward, cupped his jaw with trembling fingers, and kissed him.
You pressed all the feelings you had accumulated over the past day onto his lips. Fear, wholeness, but most potently—love.
And Joel gave the latter and more back to you, curling a hand into your hair and holding you against him, his brows furrowed.
When you pulled back, a smile tugged at your lips.
Breathless, he asked, “That a yes?”
“What do you fucking think?” You outstretched your left hand.
“Just checkin’.” He grinned, gently took your hand, and slid the ring onto your ring finger. It fit just as perfectly as the first time.
Joel turned your hand slightly, admiring the way the diamond glinted, how it sat there like it had never left.
“Looks real good on you,” He murmured, his thumb brushing across your knuckles.
Your heart was full and thudding as you stared down at it. And then at him.
“Always did.”
Through a love-drunk smile, he slurred, “is that right?”
Then you leaned in and kissed him again. Slower this time, but just as deep. His hand came up to cradle your cheek, the other still holding yours, and for a few seconds, the rest of the world vanished.
You were so lost in the kiss, you almost didn’t notice how Joel’s jeans grew tighter, giving way to a hardness in his lap caused by the sensation of your body against his.
However, you did notice how Joel snaked his big hands under your thighs, lifting you onto the table.
You gasped against his lips. “What—?”
Urgently, “Where’s Sarah?”
“Sleeping over at a friend’s house. Why?”
You pulled away just enough to catch the almost depraved grin that split his mouth, heightened by a certain dark glint in his half-lidded stare.
Almost too casually, almost as if it was incredibly obvious, Joel replied, “Gonna make sure it sticks, baby.”
And he pushed you down, causing you to lie flat on your back, a half-baked protest swallowed by his mouth and dying on your tongue. Or rather, his.
He hitched your shirt up, up, up, until the fabric gathered just below your collarbone.
“Oh, sweetheart.” Joel tutted. “Need to show these tits some love before I gotta share ‘em.”
Well, fuck.
With that, he trailed a messy line of kisses down to your sternum, nipped at the peak of your right tit like he just couldn’t help himself, and closed his mouth around your nipple.
You gasped, a hand clinging to his messy curls, holding him to you as he took and took.
He alternated between swirling his tongue around the sensitive bud and sucking it into his mouth, brows knitted as if he couldn’t decide whether pleasure was pain or salvation.
And it wasn’t long before he gave the same amount of attention to your other tit, moaning against your tender skin in desperate need, unable to get enough of you.
You were practically drowning in a pool of your own arousal from Joel’s ministrations, feeling a demanding wetness grow in your underwear by the second.
If he didn’t touch you there, you were very sure you’d—
But your hazy mind was robbed of finishing that thought when Joel came off your tits with a wet pop, leaving a light sheen across your cleavage, and dipped his fingers under the waistband of your sweats.
With an impatient yank, he pulled them down, revealing the dampened seat of your panties. An airy curse left his lips.
“Can I—?” He breathed.
“Yes.” You nodded, instantly.
Feverishly, he shredded the material in half with eager hands, leaving the halves to hang loosely on your hips.
A low growl escaped from his throat.
You were drooling for him, puffy folds glistening with your wetness and beckoning him to indulge himself in the most irresistible of temptations.
And Joel was nothing if not a sinner.
“Fuck that’s pretty.” He sighed. “Need me that badly, huh?”
You whined restlessly in response.
Taking such a noise as assent, Joel easily slid a thick finger into your crying mound, stroking your pulsing walls.
He gave no time for acclimatisation and, shortly after, sunk a second finger alongside the first, curling both again and again and reaching that spot of yours that summoned little black dots to dance in your vision.
“One more, baby.” He cooed. “One more and I give you my cock, hm?”
A third soon joined his motions, and you flung an arm up to grasp his bicep, feeling it tense as he pumped his fingers and dragged down your walls at an erratic pace.
Sweet words spilt in a loose mumble from his mouth, easing you into your orgasm. His lips worshipped you with whispers, ceaselessly praising:
That’s my girl.
C’mon, baby, just like that.
So pretty for me.
And other such gentle murmurs.
He continued fucking you with his fingers, relentless in face of your writhing, until, with a scream of his name and your clint grinding against the heel of his palm, your stomach tightened, fluttered, and let go.
“There we go. Oh, so good for me.” He sighed, breath tickling the hollow of your ear as he worked you through your climax.
When the tingling pleasure had fully subsided, he slid his fingers from you and kissed a path up your neck to your lips, licking into your mouth almost greedily.
As if it were second nature, your hands flew to undo his belt, desperately trying not to break the kiss and feeling Joel smile against you.
Just when you found the outline of his hardness in his boxers, Joel groaned and took your wrists in his hands, pinning them over your head against the cool oak of the table.
“Let me.” He said, breathing raggedly.
And he shifted to take hold of both your wrists with his left hand, while his right hurriedly fished himself out of his jeans.
You never quite got used to the obscene sight, and you doubted that you ever would; thick and tanned and dribbling slightly with pearls of his precome.
And, lord help you, he was big.
Joel hovered his mouth above your needy cunt as he slowly pumped his drooling cock. You held your breath, mistaking his position for a hesitant desire to taste you and fuck you with his tongue.
To your surprise, Joel, instead, spat directly onto your quivering pussy.
You gasped as if it was betrayal, clenching on nothing as his glob of spit slid down your already-dripping mound like a soft caress.
“Please.” You whined pathetically, hands still stubbornly restrained and held captive by the broad span of his left hand.
He lined himself up, nudging his flushed, almost angry tip against your soaked entrance. And, with a firm grip around his base, he dragged his cock through your puffy folds once, then twice. And the creamy blend of his precome, your arousal, and his spit smeared over his head, staining it in a pale blur.
“You don’t gotta beg, sweetheart.” Joel shushed you, dipping down to press a lazy kiss to the corner of your mouth. “You know I’ll give you whatever you want. I’ll give you everything. Give you the whole damn world if you asked for it.”
Despite the almost painful dawdling, his words were a soothing reassurance.
Another pass through your soaked folds. And then another, his tip catching onto the seam of your cunt for a single delicious second.
And then, in a low, possessive rumble, “Anything for the mother of my children.”
You squirmed against his hold, feeling a bolt of heat run through you, unable to stifle a moan bubbling up your throat.
The mother of my children.
Your moan, however, quickly graduated into a shrill wail of his name as he chose that exact second to sink his drooling cock into you, forcing himself in until he was seated fully inside.
A sharp inhale came through his clenched jaw.
“Fuck, you feel perfect.” He whispered, more to himself than to you, but you were happy for the praise.
He was a tight fit; this, you knew.
Oh, you knew.
Every slow push in of his thick cock against your tight walls caused you to choke his length. Every slow drag out pulled a shaky breath from your parted lips.
“Yeah—” His breath caught in his throat as he felt you clamp down on him after an especially rough thrust. “—that’s it, mama, let me in. Jus’ like that. We’ll take it slow, for now. Then I’ll fuck you full of my come, again. Make sure I put a baby in you.”
You felt yourself flutter around him in response, pulling a breathless expletive from his lips. His dick twitched inside you, practically begging to make good on that promise.
And there was that depraved grin again. “Oh, you like that? ‘S true, mama.”
He rolled his hips into you again.
And again.
“I’d give you ten more if I could.” He grunted, cloudy, lust-drowned eyes locked onto yours. “Love knowing that it’s my come in there, swelling you up. My baby. My woman.”
And, with that assertive claim, Joel picked up the pace, setting a tempo that had you on the verge of passing out.
You were overwhelmed by the sensation of his cock pounding in and out of you, the insistent sound of his balls slapping wetly against your ass, the feel of being held in place by his grip on your wrists—powerless to the force of his adamant desire.
Joel’s gaze fell to your tits, which were helplessly jostled by every persistent thrust of his hips.
“And these…” He all but growled, his free hand coming down to brush a thumb over one of your nubs. You shivered in response. “Fuck, they’ll look so pretty, all swollen up.”
A familiar warmth pooled in your gut; your eyes fluttered uncontrollably; your heartbeat sped up against your ribs as if it were going to burst out.
You were going to come. And hard.
“Joel—Joel, I’m close.” You bleated.
He grunted from above you in acknowledgement, stray curls falling over his forehead as he rammed into you. And he brought his hand to press against your belly, feeling the faint outline of him sawing into you.
“Let go for me, then, beautiful. Let me feel you come on my dick.”
And you did.
And it was toe-curling and back-arching and forceful. So forceful, in fact, that it managed to steal your consciousness away for a moment or two.
Your eyes fluttered open after you had ridden out the entirety of your orgasm, finding Joel breathing heavily through his nose above you, his pace paused.
“Shit, that was pretty.” He said, in awe, releasing your wrists from over your head. “You got one more in you, baby?”
Unable to speak, you nodded.
Smiling proudly, Joel whispered, “Attagirl.”
He carefully pulled out of you—which made you involuntarily whine at the sad feeling of being so empty—and gently turned you over, your stomach pressed against the table and your feet planted on the floor.
Not wasting another second, Joel fed you his entire cock in one steady thrust.
You hissed as your walls once again struggled to accommodate his generous size, but were ultimately helpless to the throes of his white-hot need.
His arms came around you, hugging you to him and pinning you flat to the table under his crushing weight as he slowly built up a rhythm that matched his earlier manic tempo.
The carpenter of the table that had stood in your kitchen for over a decade probably hadn’t foreseen that such craftsmanship would be instrumental in the ferocity of Joel dicking you down. But you were, nevertheless, thankful for the sturdiness of his creation.
Because Joel fucked you into that table like he wanted to break it.
Every thrust had his tip kissing your cervix.
Every thrust sent the table knocking against the hardwood floor.
Every thrust had you seeing stars.
“Make some noise for me, mama.” Joel’s voice was in your ear, low and absolutely wrecked. “Show me how good it feels.”
Obediently, your mouth fell agape. An incoherent string of moans and mewls of his name spilt from your lips, tumbling out in a staccato rhythm that was emphasised by every snap of his hips as he frantically chased his release.
It took a dozen more before you felt him seize up.
“I’m … shit, I’m almost there, baby.” He gasped shakily.
And, miraculously, so were you. You would’ve alerted him of such a fact if he hadn’t already fucked your brains out.
Oblivious to your predicament, Joel continued. “You’re gonna take it, aren’t you? S’all you can do, baby. Lay there and look pretty while I stuff you full of my come.”
“Please.” You whimpered. “Please, Joel—”
He came like he had been holding off for an eternity, shooting pearly ropes of his seed inside you, eyes screwed shut in pleasure, and face desperately buried into the crook of your neck.
Thankfully, his orgasm sent you toppling over the edge for what felt like the thousandth time that night, and you fell completely limp against the cool surface of the table as Joel rode out the last of his climax.
He recovered after a minute, pressed a sweaty kiss to the spot in between your shoulder blades, and delicately pulled out, wincing as he did so.
“That enough for you? Hm? Let me see.”
Tiredly, you spread your legs and pushed your ass out. Needless to say, Joel was entranced by the filthy sight of his milky come oozing slowly out of you.
“Oh, baby.” He tutted. “As beautiful as that is, we can’t let that go to waste, now can we?”
He didn’t wait for a response and gingerly plugged your cunt with two thick fingers, pushing his come back inside. You blew out a breath at the sensation.
“That’s it,” Joel cooed, eyebrows furrowed. And then, softer, “that's my girl.”
Satisfied that he probably gave you twins, Joel gently took your chin in his hand and leaned down to press his lips against yours.
It was tender and slow and felt like home. Because, as you finally realised all those months ago, Joel was your home.
“You okay?” He mumbled into the kiss.
You pulled away, a dopey grin on your face. “You know, we should really do this on a bed, sometime.”
Joel laughed, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he did.
“Good thinking.” He smiled.
thank YOU for reading and for waiting (my bad) and ty all for the love & support y'all have given for this two-parter!! hard to believe there are people who are interested in the silly things i write :-) more to come!!
🏷️ (1/3 — sorry if your @ somehow didn’t work?? tumblr isn’t feeling me today): @onlythehobi, @billionairecowgirl, @lonely-ey3s, @kellyxo1, @missxjennipascal, @bloodyfkghell, @marlynn97, @pedritosgfreal, @kja06, @hhallefuckinglujahh, @irmpyrz, @joelspeach, @lostinthestreamofconsciousness, @mori1b2bpad, @hannahmassey30, @staley83, @lanternnightgarden, @themarvelousmaks, @ilovppascal, @yslgreen, @joelspickle, @possiblyafangirl, @strawberrylis, @bonneyszk, @whaddupbaby, @callofdiva, @trixcate, @p1tterp4atter, @immalosersblog, @sohaaa6, @alesomoza99, @faceache111, @pedge-page, @appl3ogr, @heartsandstars34, @niaissodone, @reiketsunomizunomegami, @zohree, @beebloopbleep, @holholliday, @amoooeba, @smexy-bucky-waifu, @keerygal, @pearl-diver-m, @teenytinylilcrawdaddies, @oh-thats-cute, @ivuravix, @kissykris, @lovesbyblog, and @wkuwcb.
“The carpenter of the table that had stood in your kitchen for over a decade probably hadn’t foreseen that such craftsmanship would be instrumental in the ferocity of Joel dicking you down. But you were, nevertheless, thankful for the sturdiness of his creation.”
Excuse me, for I screamed at the sheer poetry and audacity of this prose.
"Did you know people are getting scared when they read your horror stories?? Did you know that people are laughing when they read your comedy stories?? Isn't that gross? Aren't you scandalised??"
Summary: Apparently, your IUD failed when your then ex-husband fucked you against your bathroom sink. Luckily for you, when you tell him the news, he fucks you again to make sure it sticks.
W.C: ~6.6k
TL;DR: check for your iud strings, y’all.
Warnings: ex-ex!joel x ex-ex!reader (y'all are fine now), sarah cameo, domestic life, sappy shit, joel is a tits man, breeding kink obvs, softdom!joel, fingering, unprotected p-in-v sex. reader gets called ‘mama’ while they’re doing it. (no outbreak!)
Note: second part of beck and call to appease the horde !! happy late father’s day to this guy
Part One | Part Two
You didn’t intend on falling asleep beside your ex-husband when you invited him over to fix your broken sink.
And you definitely didn’t intend on waking up in his arms, either.
Yet, there you were, tangled together in the worn mattress of your queen-sized bed. His right arm was folded below his head. His left was slung over your waist, holding you close to him as your head rested on his firm chest.
His heartbeat thudded softly beneath your ear. Steady. Familiar. Like a wordless promise to you that he was there. That last night, whatever it was, meant something.
Growl.
You froze.
Even more insistent, groooowl.
Apparently, there were three people in your bed: you, Joel, and your appetite.
As carefully as you could, you freed yourself from Joel’s embrace. He frowned, grunted petulantly in protest, and muttered your name in his sleep, before turning on his side.
And then, you pulled on a ratty old shirt and a pair of sleep shorts before quietly making your way downstairs, careful to avoid the second-to-the-last step of the staircase that always creaked.
The kitchen was still bathed in the golden glow of the early morning, light filtering in through the blinds in soft stripes. You padded across the cold floor and got to work.
Coffee, first. Then, as the machine did its job, eggs.
Eggs for two, just like before.
You stared down at the sizzling pan as if you were waiting for it to answer the question you were too scared to ask.
What now?
Because last night, Joel told you he still loved you.
Because you had kissed him, and he kissed you back, and he made love to you in your bathroom, of all places.
Because, instead of kicking him out, you pulled him to your bed and slept in his arms.
Because this morning, you wanted everything back. You wanted him back.
You rubbed your hand down your face and gave the eggs a stir. And then you turned toward the staircase at the muffled sound of soft, sleepy footsteps.
Speak of the devil.
Joel appeared by the doorway, hair dishevelled from sleep, gloriously shirtless, eyes half-lidded and tender.
“You makin’ us breakfast?” He said, voice low and slightly raspy.
“No, all this is just for me. But I’m sure the McDonald’s a few blocks down is open if you’re hungry.” You deadpanned, smiling to yourself and returning your attention to the eggs.
“Ha-ha.” Joel hummed sleepily and ventured nearer.
The two of you fell into what had been your daily routine. Joel fished out two mugs from the cabinet above the dishwasher and finished the coffee (milk and sugar for yours, black for him), right as you scraped the eggs off the pan onto two plates.
And, there you were, sitting across the kitchen table from the man you thought you’d lost forever.
“So.” You poked at your eggs with your fork.
“So,” Joel echoed, glancing up at you as he brought his mug to his lips.
“Are we gonna … talk about it?”
Joel blinked, then set his mug down. “What, last night?”
“Yeah. Last night.” You pushed around a clump of your breakfast.
“What about it?” His brows furrowed.
“Did you mean it?”
Your mind flashed with his sweet nothings. His confessions of longing and love and all else.
Joel’s gaze softened. “Every word.”
“Okay.” Your heart felt a little lighter. “Well, then, I’d like for us to try again.”
Smiling, he replied, “I’d like that, very much, baby.”
“Okay,” You said again, smiling right back at him.
“Okay.” He repeated, reaching across the table for your hand, softly lacing your fingers together.
And at that moment, you wanted to thank the stars above and the ineffable mercy of the universe for giving you a second chance.
For letting you find your way back to him, and him to you.
You shook your head, laughing. “My lawyer’s gonna have a field day.”
“You think you’ll get a refund?” He raised an eyebrow, lips pulling into a grin.
“Nope.” You clicked your tongue. “Maybe I’ll get my next divorce half-off, though.”
Joel chuckled and looked at you with this quiet, reverent warmth floating in the richness of his dark brown eyes that said he was falling deeper in love with you all over again.
Because he was. And, god help him, he didn’t remember how not to be.
Scooping the last of his eggs off his plate, he then pushed his chair back and stood.
“I’m gonna take a shower.” He walked by you to press a kiss to the crown of your head. “And then… well, we can sort the rest of this out.”
“Okay.” You smiled.
He then shot you a quick wink, and you watched as he disappeared up the stairs, basking in the afterglow of his lips still tingling on your scalp.
And the house went quiet, save for the occasional creak of the pipes and faint sound of running water from the upstairs ensuite.
You stared down into your coffee.
It was still slightly hard to process the dramatic turn of events hurled very suddenly toward you at full force. Just last week, you were negotiating which major holidays you’d get to spend with Sarah (no, Joel could not get Christmas in exchange for St Patrick’s Day—when in your life have you all celebrated St Patrick’s Day?), and now you were very eagerly ‘trying again’.
Not that you were complaining.
You’d try again a hundred more times if that were what it took to be with him again.
Smiling like an idiot, you rose from your chair and collected your plate in your hands, reaching over to stack it on top of Joel’s.
And, at that exact moment, the front door swung open, and a voice called:
“Mom? I’m home!”
You froze in place.
A few seconds later, your twelve-year-old daughter strolled into the kitchen.
“Oh, hey, mom.” She passed you a weary smile, setting down her duffel bag on the table.
“Sarah! You’re home early.” You breathed, voice an octave higher and excessively bright. “I thought your grandparents were still keeping you hostage at the lake house.”
“Yeah, well, Papa threw his back out trying to reel in a muskie.” She rolled her eyes, then walked over to the fridge to pull out a Capri-Sun. “Grandma had to drive us home so he could get checked out quickly. Nagged him the whole way back ‘cause her license expired back when I was still teething, apparently.”
You forced an overly responsive laugh.
It sounded less like a laugh and more like a startled cough that got lost halfway through a choke.
Sarah arched a brow, stabbing into the juice pack. “What’s up with you?”
“Nothing, bug.” You shook your head, glancing at the staircase.
“Okay.” Sarah dragged out the syllables, eyeing you over suspiciously. “How was your date yesterday?”
You choked. “Fine.”
And that was when Sarah’s eyes landed on the two plates you were holding tightly to your chest. Then they moved over to the two mugs sitting opposite each other on the table. And then, over to the pan on the stove littered with fresh egg residue.
“Right.” She made a face, then trudged over to sling her duffel bag over her shoulder. “I’ll see myself out until your guy leaves.”
“Sarah–”
“It’s fine.” She marched back toward the entryway. “I’ll go play outside, for once, or something. Aren’t you always saying that I should do that?”
Should you tell her?
You pressed your lips together, watching her shove her feet back in her worn Converse. “Sarah, would you stop for a second?”
Yeah, you should probably tell her that her dad’s ‘the guy’ upstairs.
Sarah bent down to tie her laces. “Mom, I don’t want to be traumatised by—”
And then her eyes widened.
She straightened up and shot you a look that was some amalgamation of disbelief and extreme confusion, nodding towards the welcome mat.
“Are those…dad’s boots?”
Shit.
To make matters worse, apparently, amidst all the kerfuffle, you had failed to notice that the shower had stopped running a good few minutes ago. And, right after Sarah’s astute observation, Joel descended the stairs. Hair slightly wet and wearing the flannel from yesterday evening.
“Good news, sweetheart, your sink’s still busted, but your shower’s—Sarah?”
The colour drained from his face.
“Dad?” She gaped back at him.
And suddenly, you somehow found yourself locked in what appeared to be a modern-day Western Standoff, except, instead of the threat of gunfire, there was the threat of someone saying something to make this situation even more unbearable.
For a good few seconds, there was absolute stillness.
No one moved. No one spoke. A bird chirped from somewhere outside, completely unaware of the domestic chaos unravelling within the house.
Ultimately, Joel decided to break the silence.
“Hey, kiddo.” He said casually, attempting a relaxed smile. “What are you … doin’ here?”
You held yourself back from facepalming into an early death.
“I could ask you the same thing.” She narrowed her gaze at him. “How long have you been here?”
Joel looked at you. You looked at Joel. Joel looked at Sarah. Sarah looked at you. Everyone looked at the boots.
“Not long.” You cleared your throat. “My sink was broken. Your dad was just helping me. With my sink.”
Smooth.
“So, you called him at eight in the morning and he took a shower in your bathroom?” Sarah said slowly.
“Well, you know your father. Always up at the crack of dawn.” You breathed, trying to sound breezy. Your voice was nothing of the sort.
“Just can’t help it.” Joel nodded.
Sarah blinked once.
Then twice.
And then looked between the two of you, wholly unconvinced, crossing her arms and somehow adopting the role of higher authority in this predicament.
“You two are being weird.” Was her final verdict.
You sighed and glanced at Joel before turning toward your daughter.
“Look,” You began, gently stepping toward her. “This is new. Like, very new. But … your dad and I are just figuring things out.”
“Not really a word, pumpkin.” Joel offered helpfully. “But we’re back together, yes.”
He caught your eye and gave you a small, reassuring smile.
Sarah’s expression softened.
“Jeez. I’m gone for three days, and this is what I miss?” She shook her head and waltzed back inside, past you and Joel, toward the stairs. Before she could set foot on the bottom step, she paused and faced the two of you. “I’m glad you two are whatever you are, but can we talk about this after I’ve taken a nap?”
Joel let out a huff of laughter. “Go and get some shut-eye, pumpkin.”
Sarah shrugged, already halfway up. “Cool. Just, like … warn me next time, maybe. I don’t wanna see things I can’t unsee.”
Your face heated. “Sarah!”
“What?” She called over her shoulder. “It would be extremely harmful to my development!”
And with that, she headed upstairs.
You turned toward Joel, wincing. “Think that could’ve gone better?”
Joel crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.
“Probably.” He sighed. “But, at least that’s over with. Telling our kid, I mean.”
“Right. Next up is telling family.” A shudder ran through your spine.
Joel smiled softly and beckoned you closer with a curl of his finger.
You acquiesced, moving to stand right in front of him. His hands immediately settled on your hips, softly caressing whatever exposed skin his thumbs found.
“We don’t have to tell everyone just yet, if you’re scared, baby.” He said, voice low and sweet and reassuring, his eyes holding yours like a lifeline.
“I want to.” You placed your hands on his chest, fingers fanning out and feeling the steady rise and fall beneath them. “Just … not how we told Sarah.”
“Agreed.” Joel leaned forward to kiss your forehead, closing his eyes as he did so.
You felt yourself smile.
“Next time I stay over, I’ll hide the evidence,” Joel mumbled.
“Stay over?” You pulled back to look up at him.
Joel looked back at you quizzically, a wrinkle making itself known in between his eyebrows.
“Yeah…?” He blinked. “We … well, we aren’t embracin’ some form of celibacy, are we?”
“No, I mean—I thought you were gonna move back in. Eventually.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah,” You inhaled, suddenly feeling your chest tighten. “Or, not. You know, it’s a very big thing, and I’d completely understand if you wanted to keep living in your apartment. I’m just offering it since, you know, we’re working things out and maybe it’d be easier to share a single … living space. Eventually. Not, like, tomorrow. Unless you want—”
Joel smiled. “Baby?”
You winced. “Uh-huh?”
“You’re ramblin’.”
“Am I?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Joel hummed fondly, bringing a hand up to trace his thumb along your lower lip. “‘Course I’ll move back in.” He then pulled you into him, wrapping an arm around your waist, and kissing you like it settled the matter.
Your lips moved slowly against his, savouring the tenderness of his touch and the warmth of his body against yours.
Before you knew it, he spun you around so that your back hit the wall, all but caging you in against it.
A breathless gasp slipped from your mouth, so he took the opportunity to slip his tongue past your lips and—
“Seriously? I leave you two alone for one second.”
You both tore yourselves apart like you were struck by lightning, finding your daughter shaking her head at you.
“Came down to get my bag.” Sarah coughed, holding up her duffel.
“Sorry, kiddo.” Joel ran a hand through his hair.
“Gross.” She muttered under her breath, retreating back to her room.
You held back a laugh, returning your attention to Joel and trailing a hand down his impossibly broad chest.
“You wanna … take this somewhere else, big guy?” You tilted your head, a certain glint of mischievousness dancing in your eyes.
Joel’s eyes darkened, and a smirk carved through his scruff. Right when he opened his mouth to respond to your suggestion, however, an exasperated grunt echoed down the stairs:
“I can still hear you!”
You both burst into laughter.
It had been a few weeks since you and Joel decided to get back together—a very good few weeks, at that.
Life seemed to fall into place perfectly.
Joel moved back in, you two were attending Sarah’s soccer matches at the same time, and nothing at all was going wrong.
Until it all went wrong.
“Dad,” You balanced the phone between your ear and your shoulder as you wiped down your bathroom mirror, already regretting your choice to heavy-clean your ensuite on your day off from work. “Aren’t you afraid you’ll pop out one of your hip replacements or something?
“It’s just fishing. Besides, why have a lakehouse if you can’t even use it this often?”
“The doctor said—”
A hearty chuckle sounded from the other line.
“Peanut, you sound just like your mother. The doctor can say all she wants, but nothing gives her the right to dictate my life!”
“No, no, just a fancy little medical degree.” You grumbled, rubbing at a particularly stubborn smudge in the glass.
“You only live once.” Was his fortified argument.
You resisted the urge to roll your eyes, opting to let out a long sigh instead.
Evidently, he heard it.
“I’m fine. Really.” Your dad insisted. “In fact, better than fine. Reeled in quite the catch yesterday.”
“Oh yeah?” You said distractedly, spritzing the mirror with more glass cleaner.
“Oh yeah.” Your dad parroted, a big, proud grin in his voice. “Caught myself a whopper yesterday—a big ol’ largemouth bass that fought me tooth and nail. Then there was that sneaky little crappie hiding under the dock. Darn slippery fella. Literally. Almost slipped right through my hands. Oh, and don’t get me started on the catfish. Little guy had the longest whiskers I’d seen, too.”
You tried to focus, but your stomach twisted with a sudden sharpness. You set the rag and glass cleaner bottle down.
“Dad, hold on—” You started, but he wasn’t done.
“Had to wrestle that sucker outta the mud, muddy as all get-out, slime glistening in the sun, gills flapping like a crazy bird. It was a damn enthusiastic fighter. I swear, Peanut, if I weren’t as strong as I am, I would’ve lost.”
Your vision blurred a little, and your hand flew up to your mouth.
“Dad, wait, hold on—”
Before you could say anything else, your stomach flipped violently, and you dashed to kneel in front of the toilet, dropping your phone as you felt yourself give way to what had been your breakfast.
The sound of your dad’s voice echoed faintly over the phone. “You alright, darlin’?”
Holding yourself up with an iron grip on the toilet seat, you let out a long breath.
“Yeah, just—can I call you back, Dad?” You managed, slowly reaching for your phone.
“‘Course. I'd better get back to the lake, anyway. Give Porn Stache and my little Sarah-Banana my love.”
“He has a name, Dad.” You smiled weakly.
“He’s gotta earn it back after the divorce.”
“We’re not divorced anymore.”
“You know what I mean.”
And, with the routine exchange of ‘I-love-you’s, you ended the call, squeezing your eyes shut and letting your head hang above the toilet bowl.
This wasn’t normal.
‘This’ being, spontaneously hurling your guts out without preamble or provocation. And people don’t just throw up for fun.
A tiny, traitorous voice elbowed its way to the front of your mind. Unless…
No.
No, you couldn’t be. There was no need to panic; you had an IUD.
Sitting yourself on the toilet seat, you very ungracefully spread your legs and felt your way up your walls.
No strings. No IUD.
Maybe there was a need to panic.
You sighed, angling your head up at the ceiling. There was only one way to test the very realistic hypothesis you didn’t dare say, let alone think, aloud.
So, you cleaned yourself up, grabbed your car keys, and headed to the nearest drug store.
When Joel came home a few hours later, you were already waiting for him at the kitchen table.
He stepped through the doorway, boots heavy against the hardwood, and froze mid-step upon seeing you there. Because you were stone-faced, worrying your lower lip with your upper teeth, and clasping your hands over the table like you always did when you had to get something off your chest.
Joel’s eyebrows knitted together. “Sweetheart? You okay?”
He tentatively neared you.
You didn’t answer. Not right away. You hadn’t exactly prepared a speech in all the hours you had before Joel ended work.
“Baby, you’re scarin’ me.” He whispered, taking another step.
And then, he knelt down in front of you, taking your hands in his and gently running his thumbs over your knuckles.
“Don’t get mad.” You bit the inside of your cheek.
“Now, why would I get mad?” A delicate kiss to your left wrist.
“Because…”
You took a breath. No sense in sugarcoating this.
“I’m pregnant.”
The words slipped out like they didn’t belong to you.
Understandably, Joel’s eyes widened to the size of saucers.
“You’re pregnant?” He repeated, slowly, voice barely surpassing that of a whisper.
You nodded and pulled away to reach to the side, pulling a little brown bag from the drugstore onto the table and tipping it over. Three sticks clattered out.
All positive.
“Before you say anything,” You hugged yourself, watching as Joel’s mind buffered. “Yes, it’s yours. Yes, I thought I had an IUD. Apparently, it fell out. No, I didn’t know before today.”
Joel was still oddly quiet.
Your heart violently pounded against your ribs like it was trying to break free.
“Say something.” You whispered. “Please.”
“I don’t quite know what to say.” Joel shook his head, his eyes meeting yours.
“Anything. Say anything.” You braced yourself for the worst.
“I mean, I’m thrilled—”
What?
“You’re thrilled?” You echoed, not entirely convinced.
“Yeah, fuck, sweetheart. I am. Thrilled, but awfully caught off-guard.” Joel ran a hand down his face.
A breathy laugh escaped from his mouth, and he leaned slightly back on his heels.
“I mean, one minute I’m patchin’ drywall in someone’s guest bathroom, and the next, you’re tellin’ me I’m gonna be a dad again.” His voice cracked a little on the last word, but the big smile growing on his face told you that he harboured no trace of fear or devastation at all.
You blinked.
“So… you’re okay with this?”
Joel’s smile widened.
“I love you, baby. ‘Case that weren’t clear enough.” He took your hands in his again, your fingers dwarfed in his big calloused palms. He squeezed your hands gently in a wordless reassurance. “And, I’ve already been fortunate enough to have one incredible kid with you. The thought of doin’ it again … well, that ain’t somethin’ I’d complain about in a million years.”
You were speechless for a moment, lost in the magnetic pull of his impossibly warm, sincere eyes.
God, you loved him.
“This was not how I thought this conversation would go.” You admitted.
“You really thought I’d run for the hills?” Joel chuckled, shoulders bobbing.
“Fifty-fifty.”
He grinned even wider, the wrinkles creasing the edges of his eyes disappearing.
Then, he opened his mouth to say something. And then, apparently, decided against it, pressing his lips together.
You tilted your head to the side. “What is it?”
Joel shook his head and ran a hand through his hair, hesitating again.
“Ah shit,” He eventually muttered. “I was hopin’ to make this a little more special.”
“Make what more special?” You arched a brow.
“Stay right there, sweetheart, don’t you move.”
Before you could ask another question, Joel turned on his heel and bolted out of the kitchen. Judging by the quick, dull thuds ascending the stairs, he had run off to the second floor.
You sat there, stunned.
A full minute passed. Then two. The faint sounds of drawers opening and shutting drifted down the stairs. Almost a ruckus enough to drown out a muffled string of quiet curses.
It didn’t take long for Joel to return after that.
And when he did, he held his hands behind his back and smiled brightly.
“Joel, what are you…?” You laughed.
But the breath from your lungs was stolen for you when he slowly knelt in front of you, revealing what he was looking for upstairs.
Small. Silver. Studded with a single shining diamond. Princess-cut, of course, you picked it out yourself.
“Is that…?” You whispered, covering your mouth with your hands.
“Yeah,” Joel nodded, eyes soft. “Yeah, it is.”
You shook your head slowly. “You were supposed to sell it.”
“Well, I didn’t.” He gave you a sheepish little look. “Y’know, for safekeepin’.”
You didn’t know what to say. Your eyes kept flicking between his face and the ring.
Your ring.
“Are you … proposing again?”
“Is it that obvious?” He raised his eyebrows, gasping slightly theatrically.
You lightly smacked his shoulder, rolling your eyes, but failed to disguise the wide beam forming on your face. “You don’t have to—”
“I know.” Joel interrupted softly. “I want to.”
He drew in a breath, steadying himself and glancing down at the ring in his hands.
“I was gonna wait a little while longer ‘til I did this again. Let things settle, maybe find the right moment. But, well, I feel like this is the right moment.”
And he looked up at you.
And, seeing the tenderness on his face, you already knew the answer to the question he hadn’t even asked yet.
“I love you. And I am dead-set on doin’ things right, this time around. I’ll take out the trash more, cook on weeknights, hell—I’ll even go to those damn parent-teacher meetings. Long as I get to be with you again. Because you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I ain’t lettin’ you go this time.”
You blinked fast, attempting to overcome the emotion swelling in your chest and threatening to leak out of your eyes.
“Meant what I said that night,” Joel murmured, bringing your knuckles against his lips, eyes still holding onto yours. “You’re it for me. You’re everything. Always will be.”
He exhaled, the tension in his shoulders softening as he held your gaze.
“So.” He cracked a shy little smile. “If it weren’t clear enough until now, I’d like to marry you, if you’ll have me. And I’ll spend every last breath I have lovin’ you like you deserve. And you deserve far more than I can give, but I’m willing to try my damndest, anyway.”
Joel raised the ring, the jewel catching the fluorescent lights of the overhead lighting and shimmering softly.
“So … will you marry me, sweetheart?” He asked, voice low and vulnerable and hopeful. And then, he added through a light laugh, “...again?”
His eyes held yours as if the world had narrowed down to just this moment. An entirely fitting simile, because the truth of the matter was that you were his world. And such a fact was written plainly in every line of his face, in how he wore every piece of his heart in his eyes.
You didn’t give him an answer.
Instead, you leaned forward, cupped his jaw with trembling fingers, and kissed him.
You pressed all the feelings you had accumulated over the past day onto his lips. Fear, wholeness, but most potently—love.
And Joel gave the latter and more back to you, curling a hand into your hair and holding you against him, his brows furrowed.
When you pulled back, a smile tugged at your lips.
Breathless, he asked, “That a yes?”
“What do you fucking think?” You outstretched your left hand.
“Just checkin’.” He grinned, gently took your hand, and slid the ring onto your ring finger. It fit just as perfectly as the first time.
Joel turned your hand slightly, admiring the way the diamond glinted, how it sat there like it had never left.
“Looks real good on you,” He murmured, his thumb brushing across your knuckles.
Your heart was full and thudding as you stared down at it. And then at him.
“Always did.”
Through a love-drunk smile, he slurred, “is that right?”
Then you leaned in and kissed him again. Slower this time, but just as deep. His hand came up to cradle your cheek, the other still holding yours, and for a few seconds, the rest of the world vanished.
You were so lost in the kiss, you almost didn’t notice how Joel’s jeans grew tighter, giving way to a hardness in his lap caused by the sensation of your body against his.
However, you did notice how Joel snaked his big hands under your thighs, lifting you onto the table.
You gasped against his lips. “What—?”
Urgently, “Where’s Sarah?”
“Sleeping over at a friend’s house. Why?”
You pulled away just enough to catch the almost depraved grin that split his mouth, heightened by a certain dark glint in his half-lidded stare.
Almost too casually, almost as if it was incredibly obvious, Joel replied, “Gonna make sure it sticks, baby.”
And he pushed you down, causing you to lie flat on your back, a half-baked protest swallowed by his mouth and dying on your tongue. Or rather, his.
He hitched your shirt up, up, up, until the fabric gathered just below your collarbone.
“Oh, sweetheart.” Joel tutted. “Need to show these tits some love before I gotta share ‘em.”
Well, fuck.
With that, he trailed a messy line of kisses down to your sternum, nipped at the peak of your right tit like he just couldn’t help himself, and closed his mouth around your nipple.
You gasped, a hand clinging to his messy curls, holding him to you as he took and took.
He alternated between swirling his tongue around the sensitive bud and sucking it into his mouth, brows knitted as if he couldn’t decide whether pleasure was pain or salvation.
And it wasn’t long before he gave the same amount of attention to your other tit, moaning against your tender skin in desperate need, unable to get enough of you.
You were practically drowning in a pool of your own arousal from Joel’s ministrations, feeling a demanding wetness grow in your underwear by the second.
If he didn’t touch you there, you were very sure you’d—
But your hazy mind was robbed of finishing that thought when Joel came off your tits with a wet pop, leaving a light sheen across your cleavage, and dipped his fingers under the waistband of your sweats.
With an impatient yank, he pulled them down, revealing the dampened seat of your panties. An airy curse left his lips.
“Can I—?” He breathed.
“Yes.” You nodded, instantly.
Feverishly, he shredded the material in half with eager hands, leaving the halves to hang loosely on your hips.
A low growl escaped from his throat.
You were drooling for him, puffy folds glistening with your wetness and beckoning him to indulge himself in the most irresistible of temptations.
And Joel was nothing if not a sinner.
“Fuck that’s pretty.” He sighed. “Need me that badly, huh?”
You whined restlessly in response.
Taking such a noise as assent, Joel easily slid a thick finger into your crying mound, stroking your pulsing walls.
He gave no time for acclimatisation and, shortly after, sunk a second finger alongside the first, curling both again and again and reaching that spot of yours that summoned little black dots to dance in your vision.
“One more, baby.” He cooed. “One more and I give you my cock, hm?”
A third soon joined his motions, and you flung an arm up to grasp his bicep, feeling it tense as he pumped his fingers and dragged down your walls at an erratic pace.
Sweet words spilt in a loose mumble from his mouth, easing you into your orgasm. His lips worshipped you with whispers, ceaselessly praising:
That’s my girl.
C’mon, baby, just like that.
So pretty for me.
And other such gentle murmurs.
He continued fucking you with his fingers, relentless in face of your writhing, until, with a scream of his name and your clint grinding against the heel of his palm, your stomach tightened, fluttered, and let go.
“There we go. Oh, so good for me.” He sighed, breath tickling the hollow of your ear as he worked you through your climax.
When the tingling pleasure had fully subsided, he slid his fingers from you and kissed a path up your neck to your lips, licking into your mouth almost greedily.
As if it were second nature, your hands flew to undo his belt, desperately trying not to break the kiss and feeling Joel smile against you.
Just when you found the outline of his hardness in his boxers, Joel groaned and took your wrists in his hands, pinning them over your head against the cool oak of the table.
“Let me.” He said, breathing raggedly.
And he shifted to take hold of both your wrists with his left hand, while his right hurriedly fished himself out of his jeans.
You never quite got used to the obscene sight, and you doubted that you ever would; thick and tanned and dribbling slightly with pearls of his precome.
And, lord help you, he was big.
Joel hovered his mouth above your needy cunt as he slowly pumped his drooling cock. You held your breath, mistaking his position for a hesitant desire to taste you and fuck you with his tongue.
To your surprise, Joel, instead, spat directly onto your quivering pussy.
You gasped as if it was betrayal, clenching on nothing as his glob of spit slid down your already-dripping mound like a soft caress.
“Please.” You whined pathetically, hands still stubbornly restrained and held captive by the broad span of his left hand.
He lined himself up, nudging his flushed, almost angry tip against your soaked entrance. And, with a firm grip around his base, he dragged his cock through your puffy folds once, then twice. And the creamy blend of his precome, your arousal, and his spit smeared over his head, staining it in a pale blur.
“You don’t gotta beg, sweetheart.” Joel shushed you, dipping down to press a lazy kiss to the corner of your mouth. “You know I’ll give you whatever you want. I’ll give you everything. Give you the whole damn world if you asked for it.”
Despite the almost painful dawdling, his words were a soothing reassurance.
Another pass through your soaked folds. And then another, his tip catching onto the seam of your cunt for a single delicious second.
And then, in a low, possessive rumble, “Anything for the mother of my children.”
You squirmed against his hold, feeling a bolt of heat run through you, unable to stifle a moan bubbling up your throat.
The mother of my children.
Your moan, however, quickly graduated into a shrill wail of his name as he chose that exact second to sink his drooling cock into you, forcing himself in until he was seated fully inside.
A sharp inhale came through his clenched jaw.
“Fuck, you feel perfect.” He whispered, more to himself than to you, but you were happy for the praise.
He was a tight fit; this, you knew.
Oh, you knew.
Every slow push in of his thick cock against your tight walls caused you to choke his length. Every slow drag out pulled a shaky breath from your parted lips.
“Yeah—” His breath caught in his throat as he felt you clamp down on him after an especially rough thrust. “—that’s it, mama, let me in. Jus’ like that. We’ll take it slow, for now. Then I’ll fuck you full of my come, again. Make sure I put a baby in you.”
You felt yourself flutter around him in response, pulling a breathless expletive from his lips. His dick twitched inside you, practically begging to make good on that promise.
And there was that depraved grin again. “Oh, you like that? ‘S true, mama.”
He rolled his hips into you again.
And again.
“I’d give you ten more if I could.” He grunted, cloudy, lust-drowned eyes locked onto yours. “Love knowing that it’s my come in there, swelling you up. My baby. My woman.”
And, with that assertive claim, Joel picked up the pace, setting a tempo that had you on the verge of passing out.
You were overwhelmed by the sensation of his cock pounding in and out of you, the insistent sound of his balls slapping wetly against your ass, the feel of being held in place by his grip on your wrists—powerless to the force of his adamant desire.
Joel’s gaze fell to your tits, which were helplessly jostled by every persistent thrust of his hips.
“And these…” He all but growled, his free hand coming down to brush a thumb over one of your nubs. You shivered in response. “Fuck, they’ll look so pretty, all swollen and heavy.”
A familiar warmth pooled in your gut; your eyes fluttered uncontrollably; your heartbeat sped up against your ribs as if it were going to burst out.
You were going to come. And hard.
“Joel—Joel, I’m close.” You bleated.
He grunted from above you in acknowledgement, stray curls falling over his forehead as he rammed into you. And he brought his hand to press against your belly, feeling the faint outline of him sawing into you.
“Let go for me, then, beautiful. Let me feel you come on my dick.”
And you did.
And it was toe-curling and back-arching and forceful. So forceful, in fact, that it managed to steal your consciousness away for a moment or two.
Your eyes fluttered open after you had ridden out the entirety of your orgasm, finding Joel breathing heavily through his nose above you, his pace paused.
“Shit, that was pretty.” He said, in awe, releasing your wrists from over your head. “You got one more in you, baby?”
Unable to speak, you nodded.
Smiling proudly, Joel whispered, “Attagirl.”
He carefully pulled out of you—which made you involuntarily whine at the sad feeling of being so empty—and gently turned you over, your stomach pressed against the table and your feet planted on the floor.
Not wasting another second, Joel fed you his entire cock in one steady thrust.
You hissed as your walls once again struggled to accommodate his generous size, but were ultimately helpless to the throes of his white-hot need.
His arms came around you, hugging you to him and pinning you flat to the table under his crushing weight as he slowly built up a rhythm that matched his earlier manic tempo.
The carpenter of the table that had stood in your kitchen for over a decade probably hadn’t foreseen that such craftsmanship would be instrumental in the ferocity of Joel dicking you down. But you were, nevertheless, thankful for the sturdiness of his creation.
Because Joel fucked you into that table like he wanted to break it.
Every thrust had his tip kissing your cervix.
Every thrust sent the table knocking against the hardwood floor.
Every thrust had you seeing stars.
“Make some noise for me, mama.” Joel’s voice was in your ear, low and absolutely wrecked. “Show me how good it feels.”
Obediently, your mouth fell agape. An incoherent string of moans and mewls of his name spilt from your lips, tumbling out in a staccato rhythm that was emphasised by every snap of his hips as he frantically chased his release.
It took a dozen more before you felt him seize up.
“I’m … shit, I’m almost there, baby.” He gasped shakily.
And, miraculously, so were you. You would’ve alerted him of such a fact if he hadn’t already fucked your brains out.
Oblivious to your predicament, Joel continued. “You’re gonna take it, aren’t you? S’all you can do, baby. Lay there and look pretty while I stuff you full of my come.”
“Please.” You whimpered. “Please, Joel—”
He came like he had been holding off for an eternity, shooting pearly ropes of his seed inside you, eyes screwed shut in pleasure, and face desperately buried into the crook of your neck.
Thankfully, his orgasm sent you toppling over the edge for what felt like the thousandth time that night, and you fell completely limp against the cool surface of the table as Joel rode out the last of his climax.
He recovered after a minute, pressed a sweaty kiss to the spot in between your shoulder blades, and delicately pulled out, wincing as he did so.
“That enough for you? Hm? Let me see.”
Tiredly, you spread your legs and pushed your ass out. Needless to say, Joel was entranced by the filthy sight of his milky come oozing slowly out of you.
“Oh, baby.” He tutted. “As beautiful as that is, we can’t let that go to waste, now can we?”
He didn’t wait for a response and gingerly plugged your cunt with two thick fingers, pushing his come back inside. You blew out a breath at the sensation.
“That’s it,” Joel cooed, eyebrows furrowed. And then, softer, “that's my girl.”
Satisfied that he probably gave you twins, Joel gently took your chin in his hand and leaned down to press his lips against yours.
It was tender and slow and felt like home. Because, as you finally realised all those weeks ago, Joel was your home.
“You okay?” He mumbled into the kiss.
You pulled away, a dopey grin on your face. “You know, we should really do this on a bed, sometime.”
Joel laughed, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he did.
“Good thinking.” He smiled.
thank YOU for reading and for waiting (my bad) and ty all for the love & support y'all have given for this two-parter!! hard to believe there are people who are interested in the silly things i write :-) more to come!!
🏷️ (1/3 — sorry if your @ somehow didn’t work?? tumblr isn’t feeling me today): @onlythehobi, @billionairecowgirl, @lonely-ey3s, @kellyxo1, @missxjennipascal, @bloodyfkghell, @marlynn97, @pedritosgfreal, @kja06, @hhallefuckinglujahh, @irmpyrz, @joelspeach, @lostinthestreamofconsciousness, @mori1b2bpad, @hannahmassey30, @staley83, @lanternnightgarden, @themarvelousmaks, @ilovppascal, @yslgreen, @joelspickle, @possiblyafangirl, @strawberrylis, @bonneyszk, @whaddupbaby, @callofdiva, @trixcate, @p1tterp4atter, @immalosersblog, @sohaaa6, @alesomoza99, @faceache111, @pedge-page, @appl3ogr, @heartsandstars34, @niaissodone, @reiketsunomizunomegami, @zohree, @beebloopbleep, @holholliday, @amoooeba, @smexy-bucky-waifu, @keerygal, @pearl-diver-m, @teenytinylilcrawdaddies, @oh-thats-cute, @ivuravix, @kissykris, @lovesbyblog, and @wkuwcb.
I'm going crazy waiting for Give and take to come out. No pressure, but to save my sanity, PLEASE HURRY 😭 Sent with love ofc <3
Just gonna proofread and it’ll be out TMR evening!!!
ALSO issue: I can’t tag more than 50 ppl in the thing … and way more than 50 ppl wanted to be tagged
so do not fret, if you don’t make it on the actual post, ill make a separate one to tag anyone else (probably two more posts bc around 150 of you wanted to be tagged oml)
But yeah!! Hold on tight! It’s almost here, folks! Ty for waiting!🫡🫡
enjoy your graduation girl! don't worry, we're gonna be ok 🤗
i love you sm!!
most of give and take is written, y'all are in for a TREAT, just gotta write the goood shit (the smut lol) but that'll be after i get back from a little trip with my friends (i know, i have friends, thats wild)----but all in good time, i swear!
in the meantime, ty for all the support and comments and everything, ty for nearly 2k (im astonished what the flip), and im just so so very happy some people care about the stupid things i write. WAY more to come very soon.
HOLY. SHIT. Beck and Call was soooooooooooooo good!! TOO GOOD in fact. R u a witch? Why was it one of the best pieces I've read on this God forsaken app? U just earned yourself a new follower!
what? a witch? that would be soooo stupid… so stupid…
how’d that get in there
ALSO exams are done thank the lord!!! I’ll get to finishing give and take soon I pinky pinky promise
