WHAT IS A GHOST ?
Keni

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@illripyourthroat-blog
WHAT IS A GHOST ?
WHERE IN THE INTERNET IS GEM ?
RP BLOGS: johanna mason / thg –– @illripyourthroat –– main, current hiatus / you are here valkyrie / mcu –– @trashkyrie –– active maz kanata / sw –– @spacepiratemaz –– active dr louise banks / arrival –– @xenoglots –– current hiatus, hoping to revamp k–2so / sw ––– @surviveinspace ––– current hiatus ………. i know my bullshit he’ll be back soon personal: @fieryfigrindan twitter: @ gemslaw discord: available for mutuals.
jo is going on hiatus —— i may be here and do a draft or two or whatever but overall just picture it as that right now if you would. i’m preoccupied with my valkyrie blog @trashkyrie , and i know that maz will be coming back with the new star wars and maybe even my wonderful kaytoo. on top of all that, finals are looming, papers, and all that shit. on top of all that, there’s a lot of bullshit going on in my life. so. yeah. trashkyrie is currently where i am, or you can find me on twitter or discord — mutuals feel free to ask for it. thanks, and apologies for how flighty i am
Sunflower gyal
open.
❛ man, can you imagine giving birth to an old man ? that’s so fucked up. just like, looking down, and your vagina is spitting out some wrinkly big fucker, but it’s not a baby. it’s an old man. with a hairy back and everything. need fucking therapy for when the old saggy balls and ‘ hangs to the left ’ dick come through. mind and vagina would never recover. ––––––––––– . . . so. i’ve never seen ‘benjamin button.’ pass the hot sauce, would you ? ❜
there can only be one
in case you forgot johanna and cassian end up with twins. force sensitive twins. they’re the lights of their lives and also nightmares.
MONSTERS.
HC + torture 8-)
send me HC + a word and I’ll write a headcanon about it regarding my character.
there are days when this is all you can remember.
how it feels to drown. how cold water is. how it feels to have your lungs burn. how it feels to burn from the shocks of wires in the tub. how it feels to almost die, to almost be peaceful. how it feels when they grab you by first your hair, then your shoulder when they shave that off and still, still keep you alive.
it’s loud in your head with this shit. because everything in the cells, not just the tub, lingers there. probably will until you die, whenever that will be. you think of how hard the bed you slept on was, how cold and hard everything was. how bright the lights were, and how dark the dark would be when they plunged you in. how you could hear the muffled sounds of the capitol above, and never know if a party or war was taking place. you think of how once a week they lined you all up naked and sprayed you down with a high pressured hose to wash you. you remember when it suddenly felt painful beyond the pain of the pressure, when the merest lick of water fucked you up.
you remember the first time you tried to cover your naked body, feeling the shame they tried to feed into you for so long. torture taught you all those pieces of yourself you never wanted to learn, in a way that almost dying for entertainment couldn’t even do.
you hands still shake in the rhythm of electricity volts in the waters. if you don’t pay attention, you scrape your tongue against the back of your teeth so you can feel the chunk you accidentally bit off by accident once down there. your body is on fire, always, in the way you always drown. they try to cure you, cure it.
but you know you’re fucked.
i have heard her and can never think about her again in the same way. she’ll never win any awards for kindness, but she certainly is gutsy. or crazy.
mcdouble:
Masturbation Tip: Let me do it for you.
mysterynerd:
she stands at the other’s doorway , a shy thing . ❛ i wasn’t — i wasn’t just waiting here , or anything ! i’m sorry i came by without calling , i just thought you’d be — home . are you going back out ? i can just — ❜
- ̗̀ sc ➝ @illripyourthroat ! ̖́-
❛ mmhmm. i believe you. ❜
she wasn’t expecting to see velma in front of her door when she got to it, but she considers it a pleasant surprise. the nervousness of the other woman makes johanna chuckle as she gets her keys out and goes to unlock the door.
❛ it’s good to see you. calm down, would you ? i don’t think you’re a stalker or some shit. come in. did you want to go out, or have a night in ? ❜
oh i’ll bury the hatchet all right. i’ll bury it in your spine.
vvindex:
@illripyourthroat
“i told your boyfriend to set me up with one of his not-criminal friends and he told me that i couldn’t handle this friends so i think i have to fight for my own honor now.”
❛ he has friends beyond me ? –––––––– alright. how you planning to fight for your honor then ? ❜
@memoryserved [ x ]
if anyone knows johanna mason, it’s kennedy. and if there’s anyone that won’t let kennedy go with this shit they do and say –––––––– you get it. so here’s their stare off. kennedy may have all the time in the world but like hell that johanna will let her stubbornness lose against this bullshit. the smile has her lift an eyebrow, but her mouth is still a straight line.
❛ no. ❜
the word is firm. she isn’t always like this with them but sometimes they need it. and who is johanna mason to ever let anything drop ?
❛ say it again, aloud, don’t mumble, and look at me when you say it. ❜
––––––––– MY BODY / IS BURNING WITH THE SHAME / OF NOT BELONGING.
chaordiic:
Owen feels old instincts flare—- like the black nostrils of some massive beast rising, bristling, lumbering forth from its cave, this amalgamation of instinct-training and muscle memory; chemicals filter into focus like bleeding through a cannula, adrenaline and cortisol and the familiar hypervigilance.
This is different, and exactly the same. The jungle, the danger, the rifle, heavy and chrome in his hands. Owen is visibly calm, calmer than he feels, keeps the length of his finger flat and uncurled along the trigger guard, disciplined. Trained. He pulls his rifle back, silver barrel poised towards the sky, reaches for her with his free hand as if to mimic her; warm palm heavy over his bicep, ushering him aside, under the long, flared leaves of hybrid alocasia. He closes his fingers over her shoulder and pulls her close, scrutinizing.
“Are you hurt?”
Priorities. Here, Owen doesn’t mince words; a sardonic quip stuck under the roof his mouth, desensitization is a mechanism of knee-jerk defiance, but his jaw sets, and he asks first, foremost, are you hurt?
The hard planes of his neck shift as he swallows, pursed-mouthed and serious. “Supposed to be routine growth hormones. But it’s more than that. The lab’s been interfering with the animals’ genetic therapy, and they’re… sick. Just stay low. Don’t go anywhere, and I’ll come back for you when I’ve put her to sleep.”
this is no time for their usual song and dance. johanna only feels the reality of the situation they’re in, no insult to latch onto with him. still, there is a low simmering annoyance within her at him caring. they are hidden, quiet enough now, and he has a weapon. she has –––––––––––– gardening tools. fuck.
❛ i'm fine. scratches just from branches or whatever. nothing from –––––––– them. you ? ❜
johanna mutters a swear under her breath when he explains. growth hormones. the lab coats can’t help but continue to experiment with them as if they aren’t some living things, can they ? they can’t help but continue to experiment with them as if they aren’t dinosaurs, with stomping feet and heavy jaws. even the damn herbivores.
but his insistence of her laying low doesn’t settle in her. she scoffs, pushing owen’s hand off of her and scowling.
❛ lay low my ass, grady. you’re not throw– ing yourself into all this danger while i sit on the fucking sidelines and wait to be rescued. i’m coming. ❜