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@iluv-iz
I can't believe the Voltron crisis lasted only two years. Seven seasons in two years. Deranged. Awful time to be online. PEAK shipping discourse. And the evil is defeated.
I understand the confusion in the notes yes the nightmare was incredibly short lived and yet it felt eternal
no cause fr. i look back on it now and think of it as a blurry time in my life. two years?? really??? with seven seasons it felt more like 4 like holy shit. we will never recover by the damage done by voltron.
Ahh, it’s back
i have disproportionately strong feelings about this.
sleep is stolen time. don't let them take it from you anymore. tonight. we are staying up. til one billion o clock.
past 10 pm blues
dununununu
scrolling on Instagram
and my archive from 5 years ago
dununununu
It's all the same anyway
dununununu
questioning my existence
and my lack of a love life
dununununu
to be loved is to be seen
and
to be seen is to be loved
dununununu
En Conclusion
A couple of days ago I finished watching YSBLF from beginning to end and while I was fully aware of the pacing issues and the rush they had in writing the ending of the series in just a few episodes, therefore Armando's whole growth arc was left out, there was still one and Eco Moda left me confused in regards to it(just finished watching that today).
I really don't know what the point of this post is. It might be super long, but as you know, I totally geek over the writing of this show, so I hope you like this post :)
I just found out FG was also the one who wrote Eco Moda therefore it's all canon, which just adds to my damn confusion!
I have done nothing but absolutely love his writing for this Novela and that hasn't changed. His writing for it was amazing. The way he was able to write such well rounded and deep characters is impeccable, non questionable, and even the characters you hate, there's something that makes you hate them a little less(except Gutierrez who is a disgusting human being...and Mario.)
I used to hate Armando Mendoza with a passion when I first started watching this show. I rolled my eyes every time he was on screen. I seriously thought he was the most irredeemable character of the entire show. I felt so bad for Betty, didn't understand why she had such a strong infatuation with him or why all the ladies were crazy about him! And to say that I agonized for Marcela is putting it lightly(Shocker).
However I made myself rewatch the first part of the novela because I really wanted to understand the whole point, his aura, if you will. I think I made it to episode 20 before I decided to re-watch, and it was then that I stopped watching it as a simple viewer and started paying attention to the whole writing of the show and I absolutely fell in love with the writing.
Armando went from being one of the most detestable, disgusting, grotesque, nauseating, and pathetic characters, to one of the best written, diverse, deep, fleshed out, and loveable characters in the show, flaws and all.
Why?
Because, while on the surface Armando is meant to be all of those flaws, deep down, he wants to be more. That's his biggest dilemma from Episode One. Armando craves to be settled down, to start maturing and achieving all of these goals to prove to himself and his parents, that he isn't a child anymore, not someone that will disappoint them time and time again.
There's so many instances where Armando tells the audience this. There were certain lines he wouldn't allow himself to cross, for example: having an affair with personal, like the secretaries, a simple employee from Eco Moda due to the socio economics and position of power, while still having affairs with Models, he knew they weren't in a different social class from him, and that to some degree, they had more power than an employee at a company.
Another great example of this is that he didn't create a shell company to save his butt at the beginning of the show, he wanted a legally legitimate company. When he did business with the con man in Panama, he told Mario to make sure it was all legal, he himself went over to make sure it was a legitimate business deal.
Armando, while he was easily swayed to do questionable things that bordered on the line of ethically and morally wrong, he always placed limits for this, and while the whole thing with Betty( the seduction plan) was tittering on the moral corruption of Betty, and he himself falling for his tricks, that further pushed him to continue with the plan, we know there was always an ulterior motive behind that plan that had nothing to do with money or the company, Armando wanted to make Betty feel special, good, because the guilt of using her made him feel like he was "deceiving an Angel", he learned the art of self-sacrifice, and putting the needs of others before himself, not in order to manipulate, but by the simple fact he enjoyed doing it for her.
That's the whole change.
When Betty found out about that plan and executed her revenge against him, Armando had to crash hard against the universe, as he himself said it, in order to learn his lesson, and that he needed to take accountability and right his wrongs.
When he returned from his one month trip around Latin America, he said he wanted to prove he had changed, that he was changing. He was calmer, more at peace, friendlier, and while he still had his moments of yelling at employees, it wasn't to the degree it had previously been at.
The thing that made him implode was that he feared losing Betty sooner than he could prove he had changed, and while one could say that him reading Betty's diary was an invasion of her intimacy, one could also argue that so was Betty when she read the letter, since she consciously saw a package with her boss/boyfriend's name on it, and snooped through it and yes, this was a plot device for her to find out about the plan, in the character arc of hers, it was an invasion of privacy, just as well as Armando reading her diary.
These were plot devices used so that each character could find out the truth. Armando's truth was to find out the torment he had cold heartedly executed towards Betty at the beginning of his sinister involvement in Mario's plan, as well as to learn that it had always been him, and Betty's was to remove Armando from the idolized pedestal she had placed him on, so she wouldn't have blind faith in him.
To concluded, Armando did show growth at the end of YSBLF. How? He didn't stop being himself: Neurotic, rageful, and irrationally emotional, but he did learn how to control those outburst and not be so blindingly violent. He proved this by not having a public fight with Marcela and the launch, like he had previously done(Which just proved the point I made in my post "Marcela Valencia Part A") and when he broke up with Marcela he told her the exact reason as to why, assumed his responsibility, took accountability and was finally honest with her, that he hadn't loved her in a very long time.
Even when he was enraged searching for Betty after he read her diary and found her at the bar with Michelle, he had the clear opening of not telling Betty that he read her diary. We know that he's quick liar and manipulator, but he chose to be truthful and honest and rehashed one of her latest entries. This was his growth.
His growth was displayed when he didn't objectify Alejandra, when he broke up with Marcela, when he kept his promise about staying civil with Michelle, and finally when he renounced his fight for Betty's love. Armando became a half decent man who spoke the truth, even if it hurt. Who learned to manage his emotions, who, from what Betty wrote in her diary on the last episode, proved to her he had changed.
That's what made him redeemable! That he always had those qualities in him, that he was always capable to do good, be good, he just never had the conviction nor understanding of the importance of it! It wasn't until he lost everything that he learned this...
and then Eco Moda's series made him look like a degenerate that slept with any woman, that he had gone to hotels with his affairs numerous times in his past( which is not canon to YSBLF as Armando didn't want to go to a hotel with Betty the first time and told Mario that he wasn't going to go to the motels or hotels he(Mario) was accustomed to) and to top it off, that he would check out women in front of Betty, when while he did check women out in YSBLF, there was a whole canon event that made him not want to desire no other woman, where he composed himself, learned not to objectify women. It waters down and dilutes his entire se*ual arc! Then to top it off there's an episode where Armando gets jealous over Betty's achievements, and while he tells his baby daughter that he is proud of Betty and how smart she is, and that he can't be upset over it because the fact she is so intelligent and still fell in love with him, makes her even more precious to him, their love all the more special, when in YSBLF he always looked so happy to see her get recognition, especially after she became President of Eco Moda, he looked like he was about to pounce on her every time she so confidently proved her intelligence and presented business proposals. Like it literally never bothered him!(tho I'm just being a hater here because honestly I guess that if in the span of two years, all your employees don't respect you and call you dumb, I guess I get that it could upset him.).
I just started watching "Betty La Fea: La Historia Continua" and Armando did the exact same mistake, except this time, stupidly illegal! Dipped into the employees retirement funds, as if in YSBLF the mere fact that he couldn't pay their weekly paycheck, drove him into a depression, all of a freaking sudden he dipped into their retirement funds?! WHAT!
Y como si no fuera mucho, he's back to violently fighting that lawyer dude! He goes through the exact same arc from YSBLF that took him months to learn his lesson, where he had to learn to understand and place Betty's feelings before his own, react better, and be a respectable and honest man for his Betty, in a damn span of six hours?
Like what?
And don't get me started on Betty's arc!(ACTUALLY DO).
Betty's entire transformation was not only physical, but mental and emotional. Betty changed, not for Armando, not for his family, or anyone but herself, with the help and support from Catalina. She learned to be confident in herself as a woman, as a human being, without the validation of anyone. In fact, she accepted to work for Eco Moda once more, to prove that she was respectable, that her work was good. That she owed it to Roberto.
All of that, so she could feel morally good about herself ONCE more.
And then in Eco Moda, she was all the more confident in her abilities to run Eco Moda and while she had her jealousy induced moments, she never doubted Armando's fidelity(when Mario wasn't involved)(ALSO AGAIN WITH ARMANDO'S ARC, IN ECO MODA HE WON THE BUSINESS PROPOSAL, LIKE HE WASN'T STUPID! HE WAS SMART AND ALL OF A SUDDEN HE IS REPEATING THE SAME MISTAKE AND WAS STUPID? WHAAAAT?).
Point is this: Betty went through a whole transformation, mentally and physically, grew as a professional and a woman, because she wanted to, learned to stand up for herself, all so that she reads a letter from her mother, who told her she changed ONLY to fit into Armando's world and for his family to approve of her, WHEN THEY WEREN'T EVEN TOGETHER WHEN SHE WENT THROUGH THE PHYSICAL TRANSFORMATION!(Not upset about my queen returning to her old aesthetic tho because I missed the bangs and glasses ngl) and THEN HER DIVORCE LAWYER WANTS IN ON THAT JELLY AS IF THE ENTIRE POINT OF THE NOVELA WASN'T A COMMENTARY ON PRETTY PRIVILAGE AND THE FACT BETTY WASN'T DESIRED BY ANYONE BY THE WAY SHE LOOKED! AND THAT'S WHAT MADE WHAT SHE AND ARMANDO HAD SO DAMN SPECIAL AND UNIQUE AND ALL OF A SUDDEN EVERYONE WANTS THAT JELLY?
IT REMOVES THE INTEGRITY OF THE FREAKING PLOT!
Sorry I yelled.
I am very passionate about this.
I am about to shout again.
AND THEN SHE SAYS SHE HAS ALWAYS BEEN THINKING ABOUT EVERYONE BUT HERSELF AND THAT'S WHY SHE'S DIVORCING ARMANDO? LIKE WHAT? AGAIN, GOES AGAINST HER ENTIRE CHARACTER ARC IN YSBLF.
I am on Ep 5 so far.
What the hell happened to the writing? To the character arcs? To the lessons? The plot?
There's so many questions I have, so many...things I want to say.
I once read a book series that I loved and went on a whole "favorite author" obsession, when I was a teen, and some other fan had asked them if there was going to be a fourth book in the series because you know, you want to keep being around that world, and the writer said "No, because they'd probably get divorced". and I have thought about that every damn day of my life as a maturing writer.
Why?
Because if the ending of their unique love story and character arc ends in divorce in the future, you simply wasted everyone's time.
The story had no purposes, no magic, no moral lesson. It simply was a waste of resources and time or worst yet, you are an incompetent writer who could not figure out how to "fix" the flaws.
Maybe I shouldn't be writing this when I'm barely on Ep 5 because I am way too confused and irritated by the writing and lack of sticking to the damn plot, but also, why the hell not?
Basically, Armando's entire crash against the universe, his su*c*dal attempts, become worthless. Betty's whole pain and transformation becomes worthless.
Some stories are meant to end when they do.
I got nothing to add here coz imo this is already a thesis/dissertation, well-written! 👏
I just consider la historia continua non-canon coz FG didn't write it but it's still nice seeing the characters living in the current day and age, I'm still gonna see through the end of it 🤷♀️
@nightcat2609
No absolutely, I missed my girl in bangs and glasses so much! Lowkey really happy to see Marcela and Nicolas too.
We gotta see it through >.<
Ironia
Nadie nunca ve la ironia Casi siempre se dominan Por eso que es del ayer Será que es posible desvanecer ¿Sin estar presente? Digo, ¿Quién lo necesita? Cuando hay tecnología que repite "Por qué emprender si puedes apagar ¿Eso que más anhelas olvidar?" Ya nadie marcha al latido de su corazón ¿Será que son sintéticos? O quizas sean robots Plasticidad del cerebro Úsala para adaptarte a alguien Que no sabe ni amar Juran que no es verdad Cuando se esfuerzan a gritar Moldeame a tu placer ¡Pero no me dejes de querer!
cuerda de mi guitarra
Un dia me marche y deje Recuerdos tuyos que aguarde Eras como una flor que nunca logró marchitarse La amargura y el destino me llevaron a ti Y entendi Que siempre iba a ser asi Tú y yo en esta cuerda de la vida Tal cual como una guitarra
El Querer y el Ser
Estaría mintiendo si dijera que no me afecta Pero cada día sigo esperando algo que no llega Y tal vez nunca llegara, ya lo sé Se me hace tan difícil comprender que tú lo quisieras así No es justo que sigamos pretendiendo Te comprendo, a ti te enseñaron a sobrevivir La vida te dio tus cartas y tú las tomaste como un fin Quisiera que te vieras como yo te veo Sería tan facil Seriamos por fin feliz
En otra vida quizas Tu eras la ola y yo el mar Tal vez eso explicaria Por que siempre regreso a ti Creeme, no es mi intencion Extrañar tanto tu querer Es algo que nunca tuve, es por eso que lo busqué Quisiera que me vieras como yo te veo a ti Quisiera que fuera facil Quiesiera por fin ser feliz
¿Al caso esto llegó a su fin? Es posible que deje de existir ¿Algo que fue tan real para mí? No puede ser que todo de mí te di Fue en vano y muy tarde aprendí Que no se puede salvar Al quien no quiere realmente vivir Es triste saber que no te veré más Quisiera que no fuera así Pero tal vez así por fin Serás feliz
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WOW
conrad fisher si fuera latino...
full playlist on my spotify:
familiar unfamiliarity
I find myself living in a reality where I look around things, people, and situations are different, but that familiar unfamiliarity is still present. I am awake again, yet I catch myself almost wanting to slip back into unprecedented unconsciousness. like my alarm for school keeps ringing somewhere in the back of my mind as it slowly slips into my dreams and into my unconscious.
I find myself breathing shallower and shallower as my anxiety heightens, and I don't know why I am so afraid again. I don't want to be scared, and still the feeling lingers as if it can only be exhaled out from a long, overbearing yawn. a yawn that takes forever to get to the top, though once im there, that feeling of relief is easily forgotten and a new fear takes over. Will I ever feel this relief again?
Surely, my mind knows it's illogical to believe me out of breath, yet my body continues to gasp and worry and begs for one more inhale, desperately seeking that exhale of euphoria.
But I can't let the shadow run wild again; I mustn't allow it to run the show. for it ran it to the ground last time and left me with a multitude of scars and aches.
Who was I before this, and who am I now?
I think about running and how it has made me feel, having gone from dreading the activity to craving it, my body yearning for it. for an escape that is at least healthier than my previous choice of drugs.
I think about how running makes me feel alive, it makes me feel at one with myself - the multiple parts that make me who i am, who i was, and who I'll become.
I used to fill up my time with just about anything and anyone other than myself, and I convinced myself that this was my mission, this was who I was. Yet that only suppressed the parts of me that knew - that always knew - I deserved better.
"Get a life." im really trying.
time after time...
ive been listening to this song a lot lately and it almost always evokes the same emotion in me. one of nostalgia, and desperation, and this deep gut feeling that makes me feel like the tears swaay in me like a mad ocean.
"if you're lost, you can look, and you will find me.
time after time"
Chills, all over my body, yet they only last a second, and with it that feeling momentarily leaves, and i am left longing again. why does it feel like i am always looking for something? what am i trying to find exactly when i know i have everything i need? but how do i get there? how do i call you? how will i know when im there?
i am reaching out to something i can never go back to yet i know a part of her, a part of me is still there with you. the innocent version of me before life became too messy, too chaotic, an endless play except this time it's not pretend.
all this bittersweetness swirls around me and sometimes i have no choice, nothing else but to listen. the one constant in my life will always be me. I know this already and yet, i wish with all my might, with this ego of mine, for it not to be true. two things can exist at once, there is a balance to every wrong, every dark, ever lie, every mask, every polar has it's own opposite. but, which one is mine?
excerpt from a fanfic i wrote
& never finished:
After meeting once again with Wondae, I headed towards the cafe down the street. As I was approaching, I felt the faint drops of rain slowly pool down my face. One by one, until a light of thunder echoed throughout the sky causing the rain to fall down harder. "Shit." I began to run, closing the gap I had between me and the now-present cafe door. I pushed the door open and made my way inside to warmth, feeling a slight shiver through my body.
"Ah, there's a line." Nothing left for me to do but wait. While I stood there, a man entered, announcing his presence was the same bell that rang for me before. He was tall, with sharp features, black tousled hair, and with an eye for detail, he seemed to fit the "tall, dark, and handsome" box. I watched as he pushed his hair back from the rainwater and removed his gloves. He seemed to notice my gaze and quickly looked my way. I turned, embarrassed, my eyes now locked on the menu. There was an overwhelming amount of items to choose from, and the line seemingly hadn't moved an inch. There was still a while before I would be next.
"Excuse me," Suprised, I turned around to see the man I had been so intensely staring at before was now behind me though he had filled several gaps between us. I quickly stepped back, confused.
"Are you Miss y/n?"
"Yes...?" I answered, now cautious. He smiled, "Forgive me, I didn't mean to startle you. My name is Park Jaechan and I am with the Dongkytown Agency of Investigation (yes this is a dkz fanfic don't judge me). I was sent by my employer to inform you we are interested in your particular case and would like to assist you. My eyes widened, Donkgytown Agency of I.V. is one of the top detective investigation agencies in Seoul. I knew they were incredibly in high demand which is why I never expected to be able to reach them, let alone them seeking to contact me.
Jaechan must've noticed my reaction, his smile now turned into a smirk as he spoke again, "I take it you've heard of us, yes? Well, Miss y/n, how would you like to join me for a cup of coffee and talk business?" I was seriously not expecting this. "Wow, yes, actually I would like that very much," I replied, still in shock.
"Then it's done," he smiled, "Don't worry, I will be paying for this unexpected arrangement."
Those words instantly soothed me, as I was secretly glad I could have just a bit more in my bank account. "Thank you."
Jaechan only smiled and paid for our coffees and additional pastries with a black credit card. He guided us towards a corner of the small cafe as we situated ourselves. He looked at me once more.
"I'd like to discuss our agency's proposal about your case, Miss y/n."
...
AHH.
Okay for some context, yes, this is a dongkiz fanfic inspired by their song, "Lupin," and Jaechan's *very* seductive "let me be your honey" line. So, naturally, this fanfic is based on the original ot5 members of Dongkiz, with each of them being given a personality adjacent and heavily inspired by Sherlock Holmes and a couple of otome games I played when I first got the idea for this fanfic back in 2021. I was an otome game addict, and I'm not exactly proud of that, but I am glad it gave me the idea to write this, and thankfully, now, I have more time to actually execute it, or at least, give it a proper draft. So, I have decided to turn this dead (no offense) IZ imagines blog to a place where I post my wips and drafts for this fanfic, as well as other ideas I've come up with.
So, this is my rebrand!
Elie Saab | Spring/Summer 2025 Couture
Christian Dior - Spring 1998 Couture
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